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rocket_man38
Jan 23, 2006

My life is a barrel o' fun!!

What are your memories of horrible guides you spent your allowance on years ago to buy, only to find they weren't worth poo poo? The guide to Majora's Mask by Brady Games was the worst. They drew their own maps for each area using some lovely 3d design software. The guide also put things in the wrong places or just didn't show them at all. It was also full of typos.

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koolkal
Oct 21, 2008

this thread maybe doesnt have room for 2 green xbox one avs

as a kid i used gamefaqs

Endorph
Jul 22, 2009


final fantasy 9 op

But Rocks Hurt Head
Jun 30, 2003

DAMN, THAT MUST BE KOOPA. I'M SURE IT'S ALSO HIM WHO'S TAKEN THE PRINCESS AWAY. OK, LET'S GO GET HIM TOGETHER!


Pillbug

rocket_man38
Jan 23, 2006

My life is a barrel o' fun!!

koolkal posted:

as a kid i used gamefaqs

I did to an extent. Back in the days of dialup though, I wouldn't get much time online.

Mach2
Feb 28, 2014



that dragon has a knife penis

RME
Feb 20, 2012



Endorph posted:

final fantasy 9 op

want to found out why? go to playonline and enter IMGAY

Discount Viscount
Jul 9, 2010

FIND THE FISH!


I kept shooting the cyberdemon and it never loving died.

Fargield
Sep 27, 2008



Ive never purchased a strategy guide in my life

Silver Striker
May 21, 2013



When I was a kid I used to buy strategy guides a lot. A lot of them seem to be not very helpful, though. I remember in Chrono Cross there was this fight the guide hyped as insanely difficult (F.A.T.E.) that I've never had any trouble with, whereas other fights that I actually could have used some hints for they refused to print anything.

Silver Striker
May 21, 2013



For example, in order to get the good ending in Chrono Cross you have to fight the final boss, and then cast spells in a specific order, and then cast the Chrono Cross spell. The guide absolutely refused to tell you what the specific order was, with the person who wrote the guide instead printing some rambling note about how you would know it if you paid attention. It's not hard to figure out, but it's loving dumb to not print it.

But Rocks Hurt Head
Jun 30, 2003

DAMN, THAT MUST BE KOOPA. I'M SURE IT'S ALSO HIM WHO'S TAKEN THE PRINCESS AWAY. OK, LET'S GO GET HIM TOGETHER!


Pillbug

lol nintendo power

Scalding Coffee
Jun 26, 2006

You're already dead


http://www.amazon.com/Lunar-Silver-Complete-Unauthorized-Strategy/dp/0761516425
Pretty much any Prima guide was poo poo and this one is in B&W and very lovely.

Lumpy the Cook
Feb 4, 2011


When I was 10 I bought a Super Mario 64 strategy guide which I found out later had a printing error, so worlds 1-6 were just printed over and over again and none of the rest of the game was in the book.

Mach2
Feb 28, 2014


The only strategy guide I ever owned was for Luigi's Mansion, because my mom bought it for me that Christmas and must have gotten conned into buying the guide too. It was actually really good and helped a lot.

Soral
May 30, 2009



Plebian Parasite
Oct 12, 2012



Most of the strategy guides I owned were extremely quality except for a hastily made 'pokedex book' that I bought a decade ago from a jr. high book fair.

Fellis
Feb 14, 2012

Kid, don't threaten me. There are worse things than death, and uh, I can do all of them.


rocket_man38 posted:

The guide to Majora's Mask by Brady Games was the worst.

Jen X
Sep 29, 2014

To bring light to the darkness, whether that darkness be ignorance, injustice, apathy, or stagnation.


I used to buy these for the sake of finding lots of secrets

then I discovered the internet

Mill Village
Jul 27, 2007



FF9's guide made you go to this lovely website to get the rest of the information that should've been printed in the guide in the first place.

Dexters Secret
Jun 19, 2014



Mach2 posted:

that dragon has a knife penis

lol if you dont have a knife penis

Cake Attack
Mar 26, 2010



the guide for the gba fire emblem calls one of the chapters "Wigglers"

i want to know why

darealkooky
Sep 15, 2011

You sayin' I like dubs?!?


had a prima guide for wc3 that straight up lied in spots, doing stuff like saying how a character died in the intro to a level when you proceed to use that character in the level

darealkooky
Sep 15, 2011

You sayin' I like dubs?!?


then again I also had a prima guide for dark cloud 2 that was insanely detailed besides not knowing about one of the support characters because she's super obscure

sharrrk
Feb 13, 2012

It's time to party!


gently caress prima

Gumdrop Larry
Jul 30, 2006



I remember having one guide that didn't give you any sort of actual useful statistical or strategic info at all in favor of telling the game's progression as if it were the journal of the main character. I want to say it was maybe Baldur's Gate? I don't remember for sure but holy gently caress it was so useless.

AHungryRobot
Oct 12, 2012


didn't get much use out of the mega man legends prime guide but it had some pretty concept art in it.

lesbian baphomet
Nov 30, 2011



I had the Baldur's Gate 2 strategy guide (maybe it was just for BG2:ToB but still, same point) from Prima and it had a full list of spells+analysis of each spell at the end

"Death Spell" says in its in-game description that it instantly kills anything below level 6 without a saving throw, in a wide area. It automatically wins a surprisingly huge number of encounters even lategame, including one of the ones that the guide described as the hardest in the game (that one spot in ToB where you get swarmed by like 100+ regular soldiers and guardsmen). Prima described the spell as "ineffective against bosses" and basically useless

it had a lot of other minor inaccuracies that i didnt care about too, but ive always found that one kind of funny

lesbian baphomet
Nov 30, 2011



Scalding Coffee posted:

Pretty much any Prima guide was poo poo

get that OUT of my face
Feb 10, 2007



brady games guides were worse than prima guides

Scalding Coffee
Jun 26, 2006

You're already dead


I disagree.

Orthodox Rabbit
Jun 2, 2006

This game is perfect for empty-headed dunces that don't like to think much!! Of course, I'm a genius... I wonder why I'm so good at it?!


I once bought a strategy guide from gamestop for a penny while on a bad family vacation and read it like 100 times

Bolverkur
Aug 9, 2012



SarutosZero posted:

I once bought a strategy guide from gamestop for a penny while on a bad family vacation and read it like 100 times

what game

Orthodox Rabbit
Jun 2, 2006

This game is perfect for empty-headed dunces that don't like to think much!! Of course, I'm a genius... I wonder why I'm so good at it?!



I was tying to figure that out but I cant remember. It was some kind of puzzle/horror game for ps1 or ps2 but I cant find it.

I do remember one of the earlier puzzles you had to collect cards or something and one of the cards said dog and the other one said god.

Eye of Widesauron
Mar 29, 2014



The Ogre Battle one for SNES stopped giving you maps and detailed hints about halfway through for no real reason and just gave you broad often incorrect summaries.

Slur
Mar 6, 2013

It's the Final Countdown.



Not sure if this counts, but this certainly comes to mind.

ForeverSmug
Oct 9, 2012



I love players guides, even if I don't own the game. Reading enemy data at looking at stats is a bunch if fun



Sometimes the best game is your imagination

Bolverkur
Aug 9, 2012



ForeverSmug posted:

I love players guides, even if I don't own the game. Reading enemy data at looking at stats is a bunch if fun



Sometimes the best game is your imagination

posted this in another thread but idgaf



that guide and that game set my imagination on fire as a kid. now i am a broken shell of an adult and nothing does it for me.

i never bought guides though, just got the one above for free. i did however subscribe to N64 Magazine which regularly came with booklets with guides on games. that was p. cool especially when collecting skulltulas and pokémon and poo poo.

Gumdrop Larry
Jul 30, 2006




Finish the game in 60 hours.

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sharrrk
Feb 13, 2012

It's time to party!


Slur posted:



Not sure if this counts, but this certainly comes to mind.

what the hell guide is that from, goddamn that's awful

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