bitcoin: a sisyphean nightmare, forever trapped in an endless wall of sperg

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Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

Using your bitcoin savings is so easy

http://www.reddit.com/r/Bitcoin/comments/2lr7t3/whats_the_safest_way_to_open_up_cold_storage/

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# ¿ Nov 9, 2014 16:58

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# ¿ Apr 25, 2024 20:42

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

Shows the boatman a qr code

# ¿ Nov 9, 2014 20:35

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

Linguica posted:

Feels good to be an investor

# ¿ Nov 10, 2014 00:36

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vnm4xFC2xNo

# ¿ Dec 20, 2014 06:11

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

https://bitmaintech.com/productDetail.htm?pid=000201412171033028658LE40FU705ED

Description:

1PH/s (500 units of S4) for $425,000 USD
Electricity: $80/KW per Month

Purchaser will own the physical S4 unit and electricity rate is locked for up to 12 months.

All necessary hardware is included to mine. Miners will be pointed to the pool of your choice. (Pool1-3)

Hosting Location will not be disclosed to the customer, other than it is in USA. If you�d like to resell used miner, we will provide shipping logistic for you via UPS. (These S4 will not have a packaging box)

If you want to move the hosted miners outside of our control, 30 days notice is needed. (when you need to remove out the bulk quantity of miner, there will be at least $2,000 per 14� truck load fee will be charged to the customer)

90-days parts/labor warranty is provided from the date of purchase.

Feel free to contact Yoshi with any concerns before you place an order:
Phone: +1 844-248-6246 x635
Email: yoshi @ bitmaintech.com

# ¿ Dec 20, 2014 06:23

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

Aleksei Vasiliev posted:

https://www.reddit.com/r/Bitcoin/comments/2pnoga/1250th_of_the_network_antminer_christmas_sale/cmykbwl
this is good news for money launderers

Looks up laundering in the dictionary

# ¿ Dec 20, 2014 06:37

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

Remember when people paid $1200 each for bitcoin cause it was only going up

# ¿ Dec 21, 2014 03:41

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

Krinkle posted:

No but I remember when people were desperately trying to sell their bitcoins for any price and getting robbed in parking lots at knife point, and showing up with garbage bags full of expired gift cards, and at least once just waiting for the transfer to confirm and walking out of the coffee shop like nothing happened without handing the headphones in trade, because everyone knew in their bones that mt.gox was insolvent, that the price was artificial, and that the house of cards was coming down any day now and they had to get out even at 400$/per.

No wait I also remember people buying the locked up mt.gox bitcoins for pennies on the dollar because hey they might eventually get out?

Backstory on the headphones and gift cards plz.

# ¿ Dec 21, 2014 03:56

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

Turns on bitcoinality

why did bitcoin crash this tims

# ¿ Jan 4, 2015 00:24

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

[�]WellsHunter 0 points 4 months ago
The way the charts are looking, and the prices have been acting, I would say "Try to be a bit more patient".
The prices are going to pop within the next few days here, and if you must exit, you should see a good opportunity within the next couple of months.
Try to hold out another 90 days, and if you must exit, then so be it. I wouldn't be surprised if we saw bitcoin sitting north of $2500 within the next 90 days.

# ¿ Jan 4, 2015 07:11

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

o_O
http://www.reddit.com/r/Bitcoin/comments/2rijcl/sending_money_with_bitcoineffortless/

# ¿ Jan 7, 2015 05:49

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

Simone and I

# ¿ Jan 7, 2015 05:54

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

With CEX.IO controlling a little over 10% of hashing power I expect to see a large increase in confirmation times from the time the shut off their machines, though the next 10 days until the next difficulty update.
I hope this doesn't effect bitcoin in a negative way.
Until now, when its an extremely volatile time, you want faster confirmations. I'm not talking in a retail setting; but when you want to send your BTC to an exchange to be able to convert to fiat, it could take 3 hours easy just to get your BTC in the exchange. Most exchanges require 3-6 confirmations. The best thing about alt coins is their confirmation times.
Just my 2 satoshi's while pondering and watching the avalanche show.

# ¿ Jan 13, 2015 05:37

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

Robawesome posted:

[�]ArcoponyBearish [score hidden] 22 minutes ago

i'm going to get margin called at $238. It's inevitable now. I'm drinking a lot and calling the suicide line now and then. I'm NOT actually planning to off myself, but having a non-judgmental voice is helping me get through this.

See you tomorrow gentlemen.

[�]ArcoponyBearish [score hidden] 15 minutes ago

i was actually going to get called at $550, so i sent a bit more to keep it afloat. Then i was going to get called at $430, so i sent a bit more. Then i was going to get called at $360, so i sent some more.

Now it's all i have, i can't send more to increase my margin. This is it.

Yes, judge me and trash me all you want. Nothing anyone says is going to compare to when it hits $238.

link?

# ¿ Jan 13, 2015 05:38

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

o_O

http://sakurity.com/blog/2015/01/10/hacking-bitcoin-exchanger.html

# ¿ Jan 13, 2015 05:45

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

[�]Hunterbunter [score hidden] 50 minutes ago
Don't panic. If you're a long term holder, use dollar cost averaging to your advantage. There will be a bottom sooner or later, and you're better off buying regularly than pumping it all in at a particular price.

[�]AKANotAValidUsernameLong-term Holder [score hidden] 32 minutes ago
I was doing this but I ran out of dollars. =/

# ¿ Jan 13, 2015 05:52

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

I'm sorry. I really am. Sometimes people lose far more important things than money, like their legs, and they feel much better than they expected after the initial greif. Your loss is real and I don't want to downplay that, but remember that you will feel better about it. Someday you'll even be able to laugh it off at a party, but for now just take care of yourself.

# ¿ Jan 13, 2015 06:04

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

To the moon

https://www.tradingview.com/v/sd3mZ4wH/

# ¿ Jan 13, 2015 06:08

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

The worst part: I made a small buy this past Friday and it is taking until next Friday to get my bits. It's rough just watching their value drop. No biggie though, It was never my intention to sell anytime soon.

Currency of the future

# ¿ Jan 13, 2015 06:31

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

Ron Paul Atreides posted:

Lol someone out there is selling butts on margin, they know what's up

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dfFlr9imxLg

# ¿ Jan 13, 2015 06:34

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

theflyingexecutive posted:

how do people think cloud mining works? like someone is just gonna let you get rich off of their money printing machines?

Also selling mining hardware

# ¿ Jan 13, 2015 06:39

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

https://bitcointalk.org/index.php?topic=922591.0

# ¿ Jan 13, 2015 15:33

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

lullllll

# ¿ Jan 13, 2015 16:18

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

les larmes

http://www.reddit.com/r/Bitcoin/comments/2sbtgw/how_much_money_have_you_people_lost/

[�]TheMonkeyMind 16 points 3 hours ago
At one point I had accumulated 104 coins. I now have 10. Tried to day trade and lost it all. I had accumulated since the price was at ~$90 in 2013. Lost ~$29 000. Lesson: don't day trade unless you're a professional.

# ¿ Jan 14, 2015 03:28

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

People on /r/bitcoin really dont think ross is DPR and Ross are the same person even though this was in his diary

# ¿ Jan 14, 2015 03:37

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

Some dude buying 40k today lol. All of it over current price

http://www.reddit.com/r/Bitcoin/comments/2sfap7/im_buying_40k_worth_in_last_24_hours/

# ¿ Jan 14, 2015 23:26

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

My bitcoin strategy (self.Bitcoin)
submitted 55 minutes ago by Stamplover
I am a simple bitcoin trader and I used to love the bitcoin volatility. I thought I could take the strategy of buy low and sell high. However when there was a massive sell off wave going on I sold at $80 only to never be able to buy at that price (although with the current sell off I might get there). Now I have a new strategy: 1) Never invest more than you can afford to lose (so you are not forced to sell) 2) Never sell lower than what you have bought for. With this strategy I aim for a yearly average return of 25%
Anything wrong with it?

http://www.reddit.com/r/Bitcoin/comments/2sgzng/my_bitcoin_strategy/

# ¿ Jan 15, 2015 04:11

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

Just explain this to grandma

Transaction confirmed 24hrs+ (self.Bitcoin)
submitted 2 hours ago * by honestlyimeanreally
Edit: gently caress me I meant UNCONFIRMED.
https://blockchain.info/address/1NfGc3ouJnY36yXzhyhsoKAHSKjVCPLYow
I forgot a to pay a priority fee.
However, the sending wallet has a total balance of 0.00; the recieving wallet lists the ~.33 as pending, but not available.
Both of the wallets are bitcoin-qt (or do they refer to it as bitcoin core?)
I've read I can somehow cancel the transaction on the sending wallet by importing the wallet.dat into a different program (e.g. pywallet) and then running a -rescan, but I'm hesitant to do this when the sending wallet says it has no funds. I don't want to lose the funds to the ether!
Help would be really appreciated

# ¿ Jan 15, 2015 04:58

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

How do you get the court artist job and how much does it pay?

# ¿ Jan 15, 2015 06:16

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

Tayter Swift posted:

morrissey moolah

# ¿ Jan 18, 2015 15:35

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

I have been buying bitcoins on every big downswing in price since $1000. My average buy-in price is around $410 for a little over 38 BTC.
While I was out with friends last night my apartment got broken into and both my laptops and safe were stolen. My paper wallets were in the safe and my wallets and back-up wallets were stored on the stolen laptops.
I called the police but I don't expect to see that money ever again. Coins were the majority of my net worth as I have been actively investing my income into them.
In hindsight I see that not having offsite backups was stupid but it shouldn't have cost me this much to learn that lesson. I am going to go drown myself in liquor and cry some more.

So much better than a bank

# ¿ Jan 18, 2015 15:41

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

and then everyone stood up and clapped

# ¿ Jan 18, 2015 15:50

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

rjmccall posted:

i don't want my noisy dishwasher to run at 3am

This is a big problem when you sleep in your kitche

# ¿ Jan 19, 2015 02:24

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

SynthOrange posted:

Look I have enough problems in my life without my dishwasher calling people over for anonymous gay hookups.

/r/gaydadjokes

# ¿ Jan 19, 2015 03:20

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

Has he claimed to be a sovereign citizen yet?

# ¿ Jan 19, 2015 14:48

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

Anyone have a link to the sorry for your loss here is 25c tip?

# ¿ Jan 19, 2015 16:26

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

CSM posted:

Whoa, what just happened here?

People giving away literally fractions of a penny to make someone feel better for their lots.

# ¿ Jan 19, 2015 19:28

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

m'bassey

# ¿ Jan 19, 2015 20:11

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.

Its so easy!

"Please note, this is only for storing your bitcoins safely offline. It is not a guide to having a secure offline wallet for everyday use.
Also note, there is a million other ways to store your coins offline - I am sure some will be suggested in the comments, however this guide is aimed at simplicity, ease of use and paranoia of loosing coins. However, there are more secure ways of generating private keys than used in this guide, but I think most will agree the method used here is very, very safe.
Ever since I got a few coins I've been wanting to secure them properly offline, but haven't gotten around to it before now. I made this guide because I know it would have helped me, so hopefully it can help someone else sparing some time or even better securing their coins in a safer way.
This guide is intended for the new user, explaining every step thouroughly in the process. It does not involve using specialized software such as Armory or Electrum, however it requires a certain amount of technical know-how (such as changing settings in the bios of a computer).
I HIGHLY SUGGEST TESTING THE METHOD BY COMPLETING THE GUIDE WITH A SMALL AMOUT FIRST. ONLY THEN, REPEAT THE PROCESS WHEN YOU FEEL CERTAIN YOU KNOW AND UNDERSTAND, WHAT YOU ARE DOING.
WHAT THIS GUIDE WILL DO
Create a multisignature N-by-M Shakira Sharing Secret address to which you will send the coins you want to store. Store the private keys on printed paper and on USB sticks, ready to be distributed to people you trust, bank deposit boxes or something similar.
This is done through an offline Linux invironment, using well known open source software to generate the private keys.
WHAT YOU NEED
Bitcoins ready to send to the cold storage address. This could be on an exchange (i.e. Bitstamp), in a hot wallet (i.e. Blockchain) or elsewhere.
A(n old) computer. For maximum security (paranoia) a computer that has never been connected to the internet.
An online computer.
Three or four USB sticks. Brand new or formatted.
A printer that can connect to the computer by cable.
STEP BY STEP GUIDE
ON YOUR ONLINE COMPUTER
1. Download Linux Mint .iso file by going to this webpage and click on a proxy near you. (Please note, if your offline computer is a 32bit system, you need to go here instead)
2. Download Universal USB Installer by clicking this link.
3. Insert a USB stick in your computer and run the program Universal USB Installer. Select Linux Mint, the iso file you downloaded in 1. and the flash drive in each of the drop down menus.
ON YOUR OFFLINE (OLD) OFFLINE COMPUTER
4. Get into the bios. If possible, disable all wifi. Set boot priority to USB before disk storage.
5. Insert the USB stick you made in 3 and boot the machine in Linux Mint.
6. On the desktop is a file that reads "Install Linux Mint". Double click. Choose to erase the disk and install Linux Mint. When prompted, select the "Overwrite free disk space" option. (Can't remember if that's the exact wording).
7. Pull out the USB and reboot in Linux Mint from the Hard Drive.
ON YOUR ONLINE COMPUTER
8. Insert the USB stick and format it.
9. Download https://www.bitaddress.org by clicking this link.
10. Extract the folder and copy it to the USB stick.
ON YOUR OFFLINE (OLD) OFFLINE COMPUTER
11. Insert the USB stick and run the file bitaddress.org.html
12. Move the mouse around until you see the menu tabs. Go to the Split Wallet tab
13. Select the number of shares you want to distribute and the amount of keys needed to re-create the private key. I did 4 and 2 - that way I hold two shares in separate locations and gave the last two to different family members.
14. Shrink the Firefox window so only share1 is visible. Hit Alt + Print Screen and save the screendump to the desktop.
15. Repeat this for the other shares as well as the address.
16. Connect the printer to the computer and install it though the Start -> Printers menu (works 99% as in Windows).
17. Print each screendump to seperate peaces of paper.
18. Insert a new USB stick and copy the bitaddress.org-master folder and the share1 screendump to the USB stick.
19. Do the same for the amount of shares you have on separate USB sticks.
20. Laminate the poo poo out of each paper.
21. Insert the USB stick you made in step 3. and boot the computer.
22. Repeat step 6. This will format the offline computer once again removing the information of all the shares.
23. Now you have a set of each share comtaining a paper print and an image on a USB stick. Distribute the set of shares in various locations that you can trust.
24. Send your bitcoins to the Address the way you prefer. From an exchange, a hot wallet or something else.
WHEN YOU NEED THE COINS AGAIN
When you need the funds, simply go to the "Split Wallet" tab on bitaddress.org on your offline computer and insert the shares in the bottom white space separated and generate the private key. This can then be used to sweep or import to your preferred bitcoin wallet service in the future."

# ¿ Jan 21, 2015 16:15

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# ¿ Apr 25, 2024 20:42

Don Lapre: Mar 28, 2001; If you're having problems you're either holding the phone wrong or you have tiny girl hands.