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Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



GrossMurpel posted:

That's for evading a moose though, not to check whether the car can survive ramming one.

Tests like that have been done, but I don’t think they’re routine.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7va6-0StIK4

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Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012




quote:

“It started because somebody emailed us under the name Deez Nuts,” says Jim Williams, an issue polling specialist a Public Policy Polling. “He said, ‘I’m Deez Nuts. I’m running. Here’s my filing statement. Would you poll me?’”

Williams thought “this is something Public Policy Polling would do,” so he squared Nuts off against Trump and Clinton in Minnesota a few weeks ago. He polled at 7 percent.

Platystemon has a new favorite as of 00:48 on Aug 21, 2015

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012





Meerkat-keeper guilty of assaulting monkey-keeper over love triangle with llama-keeper

Platystemon has a new favorite as of 22:17 on Sep 25, 2015

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



AlphaKretin posted:

This reads like one of those sentences constructed specifically to illustrate points about grammar like "eats shoots and leaves" or "the strippers JFK and Stalin".

It’s a garden path sentence.

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012





Sailor DID NOT use raccoon to bypass breathalyzer[

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



Police called to meeting of beard fans in Sweden after passer-by confuses them with Isis terrorists

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



Karma Monkey posted:

You all seem to be missing the bigger question here, which is, if I have a self-driving car, will my insurance rates be higher or lower?

It depends. Are you a young male?

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



Choco1980 posted:

I swear, this past week, Carson has decided he doesn't want to win and is trying to deliberately appear to have a full on meltdown. There's this, there's the whole pyramids quote that's just bizarre to even exist, there's him screaming at CNN anchors that they're stupid for believing he said something they just played a video clip of him saying, etc etc.

This would be a better theory if his original pyramids quote did not date from 1998.

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



cyberia posted:

If I haven't played the other Far Cry games should I start at 4 or get the other ones first?

Their plots are unrelated, but all four are great games.

Just don’t start with 2. I love it, but it’s definitely divisive in a way the others are not.

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



Trent posted:

How the gently caress do you get the basic shape of the map wrong

And then publish it without anyone noticing

I am at a loss

You have all the states (except Hawaii and Alaska, lol) in your graphics design program as separate layers.

Then you drag a selection box around what you think is the whole country, but accidentally fail to include New England.

You move the rest of the states and fail to notice your mistake before publishing.

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



I like how they say the kid was abducted, which is technically true, but the car thieves were more responsible than the mother.

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012




quote:

She now resides with an adoptive 'mommy and daddy' and spends her time playing with dolls and the couple's young grandchildren

Definitely not going to gently caress with those kids’ heads at all.

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



“Women still outnumbered in medical leadership by men with mustaches, study finds”

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012




Look below those papers.

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



quote:

Judge rules monkey cannot own selfie photos copyright

Yeah, but neither can anyone else.

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



foobardog posted:

I'm pretty sure photographers normally do have the copyright on pictures they take, which includes selfies. It's referring to that, not the idea of selfies themselves.

When I saw the headline, my first thought was that that a court had reversed the ruling that the photo was in the public domain and given the guy who owned the camera the copyright. That is not what happened.

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



The irony is that the guy probably made up the part about the monkey tripping the shutter.

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



Next you’re going to tell me that the Tree That Owns Itself is a fraud.

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



Bloody Hedgehog posted:

"For the second time in a week, the US throws out a billion dollars that probably could've gone to much better use."

That’s not how money works.

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



Henchman of Santa posted:

Is there a joke behind "Grauniad" or is this the British newspaper equivalent of a Rivals.com pun?

Wikipedia posted:

The paper's nickname The Grauniad (sometimes abbreviated as "Graun") originated with the satirical magazine Private Eye. This anagram played on The Guardian's early reputation for frequent typographical errors, including misspelling its own name as The Gaurdian.

The very first issue of the newspaper contained a number of errors, perhaps the most notable being a notification that there would soon be some goods sold at atction instead of auction. Fewer typographical errors are seen in the paper since the end of hot-metal typesetting. One Guardian writer, Keith Devlin, suggested that the high number of observed misprints was due more to the quality of the readership than the misprints' greater frequency. The fact that the newspaper was printed in Manchester till 1961 and the early, more error-prone, prints were sent to London by train may have contributed as well to this image. When John Cole was appointed news editor by Alastair Hetherington in 1963, he sharpened the paper's comparatively "amateurish" setup.

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



Cereal offenders: Tony the Tiger begs furries to stop tweeting him porn

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



Florida Man accused of tossing gator into Wendy's drive-thru window

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012




Not necessarily eating them. I think the leading theory is that a hunter got monkey blood on a wound.

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



Hitler did only have one ball. That puts him slightly above average.

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zkrcj8L7gf0

South Australia’s main rescue helicopter has been grounded after being rammed by a goat

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



With mattress as centerpiece, family celebrates Presidents Day like no other

quote:

“The No. 1 symbol for Presidents Day is the Presidents Day mattress,” Joe Vanourney explained, “because all the stores have mattress sales on Presidents Day.”

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



Guinea pig to become father to 400 after breaking into female enclosure

quote:

They noticed that the exhausted father-to-be, now nicknamed Randy, had lost a little weight, but did not realise why until they discovered he was actually a male rodent being kept busy in the wrong pen.

Shine on you crazy diamond.

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012





e: sorry tables

Platystemon has a new favorite as of 03:39 on Apr 24, 2016

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



The U.S. is familiar with British chips. They’re called “steak fries”.

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



Regardless of your position on hot dogs or open‐faced sandwiches, I think everyone can agree that burritos are not sandwiches.

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



duckmaster posted:

If they're curly they're always fries and if they've got the skin on them they're wedges.

What if they have the skin on them but they also have a small, rectangular cross section?

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



I didn’t notice the “shits” because I was distracted by open jacket spelling “SETTLE” .

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



FAROOQ posted:

I love it when goons try to correct people with incorrect, probably racist, facts

?

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



flosofl posted:

Christ, that's creepy. And I'm not talking about the dog.

Agreed; it’s the dog’s owner that’s wrong here.

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



DOWN JACKET FETISH posted:

what does "the smallest radioactive element" mean, to you

It’s the smallest‐numbered element with no stable isotopes. I assume that.

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012





Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



Canadian curling world swept up in ‘Broomgate’

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



Polish man stars in Helen Keller joke.

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



Mu Zeta posted:

She looks like she makes frivolous complaints about a lot of things



I’m pretty sure that’s Ted Cruz with a wig.

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Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012



Florida man arrested when cops mistake donut glaze for meth

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