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tao of lmao

sometimes I go to the pet store, stare at the fish and pretend I'm one of them. then, i forget why I'm even there. or who i am

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Kazvall

I like those sucker fish that clean the sides of the tanks

tao of lmao

Sometimes I'll look for the dumbest looking employee and ask them for food for a random pokemon.

Me: Do you have Diglett food?
Them: Piglet? I'm pretty sure they eat anyth--
Me: Nono, Diglett. They're like a mole.
Them: Zuh?

tao of lmao

Me: Hi do you have Squirtle tanks?
Them: Actually, Squirtles don't live in tanks, they live in pokeballs, idiot.
Me: I gotta go

alnilam

wth posted:

Me: Hi do you have Squirtle tanks?
Them: Actually, Squirtles don't live in tanks, they live in pokeballs, idiot.
Me: I gotta go

lol

tao of lmao

Sometimes if I see an elderly couple with their dog in the store, I'll ask if I can walk it for them. I then take it to the dog cages and request to "try another one," and return the new dog to the couple. Sometimes they don't even notice.

alnilam

Sometimes i go into the grooming room and pretend to be a dog, saves me lots on haircuts

tao of lmao

I don't actually own any pets, so pet stop is pretty much my only chance to play with them. I'll bring my own laser pointer, and make a dog chase the dot while Fido's owner is carrying a huge bag of food. It also works pretend-throwing toys for them.

i am he

wth posted:

Sometimes if I see an elderly couple with their dog in the store, I'll ask if I can walk it for them. I then take it to the dog cages and request to "try another one," and return the new dog to the couple. Sometimes they don't even notice.


alnilam posted:

Sometimes i go into the grooming room and pretend to be a dog, saves me lots on haircuts

Dotcom Jillionaire

Social distortion
i like to go to the pet stores and feed the animals some of my nachos or pretzel or whatever i got at the mall food court. it's like i'm sharing lunch with a friend

tao of lmao

Me and my friend, a conure named Toby, sharing a Cinnabon.

Dotcom Jillionaire

Social distortion
parakeets LOVE nachos i know this for a fact

tao of lmao

I really love the snakes. They're so cool and slithery. Sometimes, I'll catch some mice in my yard and bring them to feed the snakes. Everyone freaks the gently caress out and I'm like wtf, the snake's just gonna eat them anyway who cares.

Mapparu

Whenever I go to the pet store, I go in the back where the large dog cages are and bring my blanket. Then, I make my bed and lay in the dog cage, locking myself in. Then I take a little nap, it always helps during my lunch break so I can recharge my batteries.

Bwee

wth posted:

Me: Hi do you have Squirtle tanks?
Them: Actually, Squirtles don't live in tanks, they live in pokeballs, idiot.
Me: I gotta go

bwatts

Mapparu posted:

Whenever I go to the pet store, I go in the back where the large dog cages are and bring my blanket. Then, I make my bed and lay in the dog cage, locking myself in. Then I take a little nap, it always helps during my lunch break so I can recharge my batteries.

Salmiakki


wth posted:

Sometimes if I see an elderly couple with their dog in the store, I'll ask if I can walk it for them. I then take it to the dog cages and request to "try another one," and return the new dog to the couple. Sometimes they don't even notice.

mags

I am a congenital optimist.
i ask about pets on display but only refer to them by the noises they make.

Bwee
I was kicked out of pet stop for repeatedly asking to see the snails with human tits

WindmillSlayer

Bwee posted:

I was kicked out of pet stop for repeatedly asking to see the snails with human tits

a snail with human tits

GEExCEE

snail with human tits trafficking is a major problem, in the us and abroad. and most pet stores are complicit.

Lock

hardcore sound gets you hypah

hwo do you empryquote an enitre thread

i have a need

A Spider Covets


sometimes it is good to go into the kitten section and poke your fingers through the bars to gently scratch the kittens on their cheeks as they try* to get your attention





*succeed, without fail

tao of lmao

Bwee posted:

I was kicked out of pet stop for repeatedly asking to see the snails with human tits

They keep saying the don't know what it is, but they're hiding it from me, I just know it!

A Spider Covets


wth posted:

They keep saying the don't know what it is, but they're hiding it from me, I just know it!

you have to go to victoria's secret for snails with human tits, not a pet store. that is what her secret truly is

Lil Cunty


A Spider Covets posted:

you have to go to victoria's secret for snails with human tits, not a pet store. that is what her secret truly is

tao of lmao

Mapparu posted:

Whenever I go to the pet store, I go in the back where the large dog cages are and bring my blanket. Then, I make my bed and lay in the dog cage, locking myself in. Then I take a little nap, it always helps during my lunch break so I can recharge my batteries.

This but with the doggy beds in the back of the store. If you take two of the larger ones and make a clamshell with them, you can comfortably sleep for a while before anyone notices. Slept straight through till morning one time and not a single person realized.

alnilam

$5 for a bale of straw? Yeah right. I just stroll right into the rabbit and rodent area and collect their bedding. The store can't stop you, if there's no price listed it's free.

Lil Cunty


i fired my life coach after i realized the puppy training courses at the pet store were teaching the same skill sets. plus i get treats for sitting, staying and accomplishing other life goals

FluffieDuckie

WD-40 posted:

i fired my life coach after i realized the puppy training courses at the pet store were teaching the same skill sets. plus i get treats for sitting, staying and accomplishing other life goals

alnilam

WD-40 posted:

i fired my life coach after i realized the puppy training courses at the pet store were teaching the same skill sets. plus i get treats for sitting, staying and accomplishing other life goals

cuntman.net

i like to go to the pet store and make faces at the animals there. eyes wide and teeth showing, stuff like that so they get spooked. eventually they get spooked just when i show up. i can tell when they get new animals because they have no reaction to me but my friends think its because i recognize all the animals. im dr doolittle, but evil

City of Glompton

I only go to the pet store on free sample day. That's how learned I prefer rice & lamb over chicken

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN


I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.


WD-40 posted:

i fired my life coach after i realized the puppy training courses at the pet store were teaching the same skill sets. plus i get treats for sitting, staying and accomplishing other life goals

FluffieDuckie

Siluvayne posted:

I only go to the pet store on free sample day. That's how learned I prefer rice & lamb over chicken

bacalou


the pet shop said they were having a sale on bearded dragons but the girl tried to sell me some tiny gecko or something. i keep trying to sneak into the back but they always hide the dragons somehow

tao of lmao

Siluvayne posted:

I only go to the pet store on free sample day. That's how learned I prefer rice & lamb over chicken

lol

Savage For The Winjun


i am seriously considering getting a chameleon, they are the most chill of pets and i could just bring him anywhere he would just blend in on my shoulder or something

Slot


WD-40 posted:

i fired my life coach after i realized the puppy training courses at the pet store were teaching the same skill sets. plus i get treats for sitting, staying and accomplishing other life goals

lmao

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verily carefree

i have very strong opinions about pets and pet stores let me assure you.

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