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I think the worst thing about the EU is that I remember so much of it. Especially the stories about the Solo kids. I think all three had been kidnapped or threatened with kidnapping at least five or six times during their childhood. That seems like bad parenting to me. Thank God I bailed when the Vong thing happened and started reading better books.
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Nov 25, 2014 03:10
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Cubey posted:yet neither the christmas special nor any of the eu poo poo is as bad as episode 2 What sucks about episode 2 is that there were some pretty cool parts in it, it just had some unbearably lovely ones that ruined it.
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Nov 25, 2014 03:10
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remember when the dude poisoned mon mothma by throwing a poison drink in her face that he was allowed to bring into the ultra high security ball dance or whatever
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Nov 25, 2014 03:11
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as bad as the EU was generally the thrawn trilogy loving ruled, was actually competently written, and if they had any sense they'd just have made that episodes 7, 8, and 9
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Nov 25, 2014 03:12
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natetimm posted:What sucks about episode 2 is that there were some pretty cool parts in it no there weren't. this might be true of episodes 1 and 3 but episode 2 is a trainwreck start to finish with zero redeeming qualities or ideas. the holiday special, on the other hand, i watch every year around christmas because it is a masterpiece that needs to be worshipped.
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Nov 25, 2014 03:13
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FizFashizzle posted:as bad as the EU was generally the thrawn trilogy loving ruled, was actually competently written, and if they had any sense they'd just have made that episodes 7, 8, and 9 Counterpoint: Arian_Samurai posted:http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Luke_Skywalker
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Nov 25, 2014 03:14
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that last is a joke tho
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Nov 25, 2014 03:19
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Cubey posted:no there weren't. this might be true of episodes 1 and 3 but episode 2 is a trainwreck start to finish with zero redeeming qualities or ideas. I like parts of the big battle at the end.
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Nov 25, 2014 03:20
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StashAugustine posted:that last is a joke tho I honestly can't remember but Luuke is real though? That is still way too ridiculous.
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Nov 25, 2014 03:21
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That loving Jedi droid has convinced me that there is no limit to EU content. What other inconceivable poo poo is out there? Is there a "Post Padme" Vader love story? Does Leia kill an Emperor clone? Does Lando ever weild a lighsabre? Are Star Destroyers post Endore avaliable on the black market? Is there a third Death Star? Does IG-88 ever drive around in an AT-ST? Do Ewoks ever engage in space travel? Does C3P0 have a love interest?
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Nov 25, 2014 03:59
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Blistex posted:That loving Jedi droid has convinced me that there is no limit to EU content. What other inconceivable poo poo is out there? http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Abominor
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Nov 25, 2014 04:00
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Blistex posted:That loving Jedi droid has convinced me that there is no limit to EU content. What other inconceivable poo poo is out there? Without even knowing examples of any I'm sure that most of those must have happened.
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Nov 25, 2014 04:02
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gohuskies posted:They're called Selonians. this appears to have been an excuse to draw pregnant furry porn 
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Nov 25, 2014 04:05
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So one of those had the hots for 3PO?
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Nov 25, 2014 04:11
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Blistex posted:That loving Jedi droid has convinced me that there is no limit to EU content. What other inconceivable poo poo is out there? quote:Does Leia kill an Emperor clone? Luke and Leia kill the first Emperor clone together: Appearing in his Eclipse-class dreadnought Eclipse above Pinnacle Base, Palpatine demanded the return of his stolen holocron and the presence of Leia, who complied, in exchange for a possible truce with the New Republic. When Leia arrived aboard Eclipse, she implored Luke for help—as foretold by Bodo Baas's Master a thousand years earlier. Skywalker managed to cast off the veil of the dark side that cloaked his mind and turned on Palpatine. Enraged at this latest development, Palpatine brandished a blue-bladed lightsaber and struck at Luke. Despite Palpatine's viciousness, Luke managed to defeat the Sith Lord in a brief but intense lightsaber duel, slicing off his hand. Palpatine was hardly finished, summoning a Force storm against the New Republic fleet. However, the siblings banded together and, with the aid of the unborn Anakin Solo, were able to use the light side of the Force to temporarily sever Palpatine's connection to the Force. The Force storm, no longer under Palpatine's control, destroyed Eclipse, killing Palpatine again while the pair fled, ending the Battle of Pinnacle Base. His spirit survived and found its way into another clone body. quote:Does Lando ever weild a lighsabre? The two Rebels agreed to help the Iskalonians repel the remaining Nagai forces, who had garrisoned themselves in a large tower. Just as they gave their consent, the party was attacked by a group of Nagai divers and stormtroopers. Hoping to cover the escape of the fleeing, unarmed Iskalonians, Calrissian and Skywalker stood their ground. Despite killing several of their assailants, they were eventually overpowered by the Nagai sonic weapons. Just as the stormtroopers trapped the defeated pair with net guns, Kiro sprang from the ocean and dispatched the remainder of the Nagai-aligned party. Kiro swam off without stopping for conversation, leaving the gambler and Jedi to shake off the effects of the sonic weapons. Calrissian was convinced that the Nagai had escaped with Mone and several Iskalonians captive. He feared that, given the school-centric nature of the Iskalonians, and their hatred of the slavery the Nagai were imposing on them, the entire species would rather commit suicide than succumb to the invaders. The two quickly formulated a plan: they would destroy the Nagai tower as quickly as possible. They swam to the ocean floor near the tower, and began hacking away at it—Luke with his lightsaber, and Calrissian with a smaller lightsaber that Luke had "whipped up" some time prior. As they swung at the base of the tower, Calrissian began fearing that the native Chiaki predators would attack them. As he expressed this concern, two Nagai divers approached the pair, but were suddenly intercepted and slain by Kiro. With the Nagai dead, Kiro and Skywalker swam off to rescue the Iskalonians inside the tower, while Calrissian continued destroying the tower. Kiro and Skywalker were successful in their task, and before long, Calrissian had toppled the Nagai construction. Shortly after, having returned to the Cobra, the two Rebels said their goodbyes to Kiro and the Iskalonians. quote:Is there a third Death Star? Third and a half: http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Death_Star_III http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Death_Star_prototype quote:Do Ewoks ever engage in space travel? quote:Does C3P0 have a love interest? R2-D2 gohuskies fucked around with this message at 04:23 on Nov 25, 2014 |
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Nov 25, 2014 04:14
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Blistex posted:That loving Jedi droid has convinced me that there is no limit to EU content. What other inconceivable poo poo is out there? Vader never falls in love with anyone else thank god There is an emperor clone but I can't remember what happened to him. Yeah. I think. In the X-wing books a smuggler captures a Star Destroyer & by the rules of the New Republic gets to keep it (after it got mostly disarmed down to what would be okay for a civilian vessel that size) he paints it red and turns it into a massive mobile trading post/casino. So kinda? Also a lot of the Star Destroyer captains & crew became mercenaries or warlords after the empire fell. No idea Yub yub Commander (at least one does) Probably.
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Nov 25, 2014 04:24
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Blistex posted:So one of those had the hots for 3PO? no, like the rest of the EU it's just terrible
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Nov 25, 2014 04:25
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RAGE HOLE posted:The People vs George Lucas is a very entertaining documentary about how fandom creates a sense of ownership of a franchise, especially when the original creator's work goes downhill. Jar Jar's dad being reminded of his son and subsequently blowing his brains out will always be the high point of any Star Wars related media
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Nov 25, 2014 04:30
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"My father, the Emperor, had many powers of the Dark Side. But without three eyes he could never achieve perfection." ―Trioculus
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Nov 25, 2014 04:38
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platedlizard posted:There is an emperor clone but I can't remember what happened to him. There are two emperor clones - the first one kidnaps Luke and converts him to the dark side, then Leia shows up and converts him back, then they kill the emperor with his own force storm. The second clone tries to kidnap Anakin Solo but Luke and Leia confront him and Han comes around and shoots him in the back.
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Nov 25, 2014 05:28
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suspicious donkey! posted:so why did that r2 unit have a bad motivator?? i need to know the epic back story Applewhite posted:The droid was actually force sensetive and just as it was heading over to Uncle Owen, it had a premonition of the important events to come and how vital it was that R2 D2 play a part in them. It used its force powers to blow its own motivator. Jesus Christ I thought Applewhite was making that up but there we go.  Half the time in this thread I can't tell if people are just making up the dumbest poo poo they can think of or whether they're accurately reporting on genuine EU content.
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Nov 25, 2014 05:41
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Snowglobe of Doom posted:Jesus Christ I thought Applewhite was making that up but there we go. It's genuine EU content. No one is making anything up.
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Nov 25, 2014 05:43
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Snowglobe of Doom posted:Jesus Christ I thought Applewhite was making that up but there we go. All of the dumb poo poo is true. Even the dumb poo poo that Blistex thought he made up.
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Nov 25, 2014 05:44
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Snowglobe of Doom posted:Jesus Christ I thought Applewhite was making that up but there we go. Ok lets play a game, guess if the following phrase is a real EU thing or if I made it up (answer below)... "Han Solo versus Space Zombies" http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Death_Troopers
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Nov 25, 2014 05:48
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gohuskies posted:Luke and Leia kill the first Emperor clone together: Of course Luke cuts off the Emperor's hand. Of course he does.
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Nov 25, 2014 05:54
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Leviathan Song posted:All of the dumb poo poo is true. Even the dumb poo poo that Blistex thought he made up. The Vader love interest and IG-88 driving an Imperial walker were the only ones that didn't happen. How about... Chewbacca's wife and kid(s) die at the hands of the Empire. Mom Mothma sacrifices herself to save the new republic. AT-AT's are used (post Endor) as farming implements. There is a planet of Sith just chilling out during all the movies, then they decide to stir poo poo up. Darth Vader is cloned and for some inexplicable (yet eye-rolling) reason appears in his suit. Akbar gets to announce that "it's another trap". The Empire (post Endor) decides that "insert mythical item" will restore them to power instead of the shitload of ships and men they still have at their disposal.
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Nov 25, 2014 06:20
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Blistex posted:The Vader love interest and IG-88 driving an Imperial walker were the only ones that didn't happen. How about... This happens multiple times. quote:Darth Vader is cloned and for some inexplicable (yet eye-rolling) reason appears in his suit. http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Darth_Vader_(clone) quote:At some point before 0 ABY, Darth Vader visited ancient Jedi ruins on Dantooine which housed an active, yet unmanned, cloning facility. He was ambushed by security turrets and his squad was all killed. Vader was injured during this visit and some of his blood was left in the facility. So yeah quote:The Empire (post Endor) decides that "insert mythical item" will restore them to power instead of the shitload of ships and men they still have at their disposal. Again, this happens multiple times, although sometimes it's a person not an object.
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Nov 25, 2014 07:44
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gohuskies posted:Third and a half: Plus the Darksaber. http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Darksaber
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Nov 25, 2014 08:10
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ThePutty posted:what happened to that thread dedicated to goons reading and reviewing loving horrible star wars EU books and comics? Someone closed it randomly and it wasn't remade.
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Nov 25, 2014 08:12
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burritolingus posted:Plus the Darksaber. If you include the Darksaber in the Death Star family because it has the same superlaser, you have to include the Tarkin as well. http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Tarkin_(superweapon)
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Nov 25, 2014 08:17
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You know, Star Wars Rebels isn't all that bad. I didn't care for the cgi Clone Wars but Rebels is alright. It'd be a lot better if it weren't for the kid character. He should be a bit older, like more Luke's age in the original film, and less annoying. Or scrap him altogether, because it isn't like there aren't other characters on that show that couldn't be interesting if they were given the spotlight. And those are all the words I have right now for a children's television cartoon.
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Nov 25, 2014 08:17
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platedlizard posted:In the X-wing books a smuggler captures a Star Destroyer & by the rules of the New Republic gets to keep it (after it got mostly disarmed down to what would be okay for a civilian vessel that size) he paints it red and turns it into a massive mobile trading post/casino. So kinda? Also a lot of the Star Destroyer captains & crew became mercenaries or warlords after the empire fell. First thing in the thread that actually sound fun
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Nov 25, 2014 08:19
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thrawn trilogy was really dumb. "battle meditation by a crazy jedi" lol i don't even remember the other lovely parts. there's like "wookies but COOLER" species i think that thrawn keeps as servants or something. also, i don't think ig-88 ever drove an at-at, but i'm pretty sure his brain took control of the death star ii seconds before it blew up or something
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Nov 25, 2014 12:13
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loving ysalamiri
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Nov 25, 2014 12:31
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Star Wars has a lot of dumb names for dudes in it, but I think this one is the worst name Savage Opress He's Darth Maul's older brother. For some reason someone thought this was a good idea for a character
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Nov 25, 2014 12:41
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FizFashizzle posted:like i can't think of anything specific but kevin j anderson was consistently the worst author i've ever seen published. Karen Traviss
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Nov 25, 2014 13:26
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Howard Beale posted:loving ysalamiri Yep, there are parts of Thrawn that are okay, but even the Best of The Best EU is full of really dumb bullshit.
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Nov 25, 2014 13:42
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Cyberball 2072 posted:Yep, there are parts of Thrawn that are okay, but even the Best of The Best EU is full of really dumb bullshit. The Thrawn and X-wing stuff really isn't that bad when you realize it's written for 12 year old boys. It's funny how bad Kevin J. Anderson is, even in that context.
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Nov 25, 2014 13:59
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Cnut the Great posted:
Have you seen some of the other Darth names? They're really stupid.
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Nov 25, 2014 15:53
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Aesop Poprock posted:There's literally a clone of Luke Skywalker in them who is an evil Skywalker and his name is Luuke and he has a tiny evil goatee (he was made out of the hand that got cut off in empire strikes back) and nobody thought it was dumb at the time I refuse to believe this. You're making this up.
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Nov 25, 2014 15:55
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