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Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Hero of the soviet union.
Accidental destroyer of planets
This is the Simulation Game - the chat thread has been talking about GM's who like to run worlds as if they are living breathing places. Random tables tell the GM what happens to places, people and random events.
This is that taken to the groggy extreme - a world so reliant on random tables that the PC's have no chance of ever doing anything interesting. Before a lowly level 1 adventurer could even hear of the Mighty Dungeon of the Dark Lord Agog, (a 20 on the streetwise table). a Lvl20 adventurer has stopped off, killed Agog, looted his dungeon and run off with the captured princess. (20 on the random adventure table, +20 for being a Lvl20 GMPC.)

This will not be a game of heroes, this will be a game of random tables. why will this be interesting? well, I'm going to let YOU lot make the tables. So basically this is CYOA where the voting is replaced by a random roll. this will be done one a dice rolling site and displayed to show no cheating has occurred.

The Laws - The immutable laws (not to be confused with the rules, which will change as the GM (me) decides.

1) The Tables are always right, and the GM must abide by the result of the table.
2) The GM cannot create or add to tables. He may modify them, but only to turn them into a rollable format or remove inconsistent results.
3) Tables must conform to a format rollable by dice. The smallest we have been given is a D3, the Largest a D100 - although multiples of said dice may be used (2D6, 2D10 ect) Tables should always be configured to use the smallest dice possible. (i.e, a D100 table with only 20 results on it should be turned into a D20 table). Tables may go above/below the min/max rollable, but only to account for modifiers.
4) Tables must do what they were created for, and be internally consistent. A spellcasting table with no spells on it is out, as is a Combat table with 9 combat results and one result reading "NPC's wife has a baby".
5) Nothing may be deleted from a table, only added and renumbered. Unless it contravenes law 4. Of course.
6) the Table sheets must not be defaced or otherwise made unusable by Goon Antics. please make tables in a neat and organized fashion. make a new tab or request a new workbook if necessary. Try and group tables of similar use together.


The Rules if these get to long, they will be moved to a google docs of their own.
Step 1 - roll for setting

NPCs
NPC's will be represented as a series of bonuses to certain table types. So a warrior may have +5 to rolls on fighting tables, and -20 to spell rolls. This keeps down the book keeping.


Right, time to get started. Of course, we need to pick a setting - and in the spirit of the game. We need a table for that! your suggestions should be the type of game (high fantasy/sci-fi/horror ect) with a little more detail - i.e Low Fantasy, dwarves attempting to found a new mountain hall. Basically an elevator pitch to the campaign.

World Building Tables
Descision Tables
GMPC Tables
Quest Tables

Feel free to create any other tables you think we may need, but please post in thread if you do, I need to keep a list of tables available to me! Also, it may be bets to hold off going crazy until a setting have been rolled.

Also, like any good CYOA, feel free to chat in the thread!

Grey Hunter fucked around with this message at 12:32 on Dec 17, 2014

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Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Hero of the soviet union.
Accidental destroyer of planets

Angrymog posted:

Added a couple of settings that didn't look duplicated on the list.

Is there going to be a game system attached to this on the basis that we might eventually be able to do something?

I'm not sure yet, I'll see how far it goes.

we're up to 75 ideas so far, so once it tops 100 I'll call that a full table and roll.

Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Hero of the soviet union.
Accidental destroyer of planets
Welp! That filled up fast! So double posting so everyone sees.

The setting is .....

Looks like high fantasy, but is actually sci-fi

So, we have a setting, time to get a few more tables going. I now need the following things.

1) A place type table
2) A race/species (because it looks fantasy, but is sci-fi)
3) Name Generators (Places and races I guess)
4) an Evil Plot table.
5) at least one job table (for the soon to be generated BBEG and and good guys I need to throw in)

Basically, go whole hog.

Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Hero of the soviet union.
Accidental destroyer of planets
Welcome to the world of (Actual Place Names) Utopia Great. This is a world where sufficiently advanced science has been confused with magic.
People go around their day to day business without realising they are living on a planet that has been abandoned by a once powerful interstellar empire.

On Utopia Great (Races, 3 rolled for) Shoemaker Elves live alongside ((Anthropomorphization of Household Object table)Moe Anthropomorphized Fleshlights and Regular Earth Squirrels.

This story starts in the (Large Scale Locations) Huge Palace of (Mostly mixed races name table) [Location Environment] City.

Here, (Race) (Name, Independent Big Person Roll Human name) Micheal Gauss, leader of the Hivemind Bugs, and (Head of State)A good celebrity and (Race) (Romucan name) Worf(REAL head of state), a Romucan clueless guy following instructions from an ancient prophecy, have just learned that the evil (Race) (Criminal Career) Shadow Eater Assassin (Shadow eater Name) Dolan has begun (Evil Plot) to move following the death of the Great Protector.

His (Evil plot again) desire for riches has led him to send his (Race) Rubyions (Sentient floating ruby crystals) into the countryside around [Location Environment] City to Just mug TONS of people - plundering the countryside. the Rubyons have sided with Dolan to attempt to free thier kin trapped in the vaults of The Great Protector’s vaults, and woe betide anyone found with a precious gem on their purpose.

Micheal Gauss and Worf, as rulers of [Location Environment] City, have a difficult decision to make. How to they respond? The Shoemaker elves are not warriors, and the Fleshlighters are….. let be polite here and call them a service industry. The Great Protector loved two things it seems. And the Squirrels are of no real use unless nuts need storing.

A difficult choice needs to be made.

:bravo: Goons, :bravo:

In one (small) update we have created a race of walking sex toys and precious gems that steal from people Russian reversal style!

So, on to the difficult choice. Now, some, terrible, None Simulationist GMs would call on the players or even (gasp) the PC’s! not here! I need a table to roll on.

Please use this worksheet to create any decision tables you wish to make. One table should be dedicated to the task at hand. You could be random, or remember that the choices are being made by a hivemind celebrity (I’m not even sure how that works) and a guy blindly following an ancient prophecy.

Next up, I think it would help if you made some tables for the creation of GMPC’s. As we all know a good GMPC prevents the players from disrupting your campaign, having the skills needed to push the plot forward and prevent the terrible disease of Murderhoboism. In fact, we need GMPC’s so good that they preclude the need for PC’s at all!

Please supply tables here GMPC’s will need a class, and that should have bonuses/negatives to various activities. GMPC level will be generated with a D20, and that level will be the strength of the bonus. Multiclassing is allowed.


Finally, Quest Tables - these should relate to the actual going on a quest - threats, traps, locations, loot. You know what to do.

Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Hero of the soviet union.
Accidental destroyer of planets

Zybourne Clock posted:

e: I think [Location Environment] means 'take a descriptor from both the location and environments' table, but the current name is much better.

Yeah, it sounds like a corrupt file or something, so I stuck with it. :)

I've also pretty much decided who the Great Protector was, so I'll spout lore on that in the next post.

Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Hero of the soviet union.
Accidental destroyer of planets
Fixed now. Sorry about that.

Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Hero of the soviet union.
Accidental destroyer of planets

frankenfreak posted:

You decided? What happened to tables? :crossarms:

Well, I have an idea of his background, but the rest shall be tables, no fear!

Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Hero of the soviet union.
Accidental destroyer of planets

Something Else posted:

Sounds like someone needs to see what a Great Protector backgrounds table looks like

Yes, Yes I do.

Also, 10 points to the glorious bastard who added "store nuts for winter" to the Actions table.

Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Hero of the soviet union.
Accidental destroyer of planets
The two leaders of [Location Environment] City think long and hard through the night. They finally make their (decision) as dawns light streaks through the window. They shall challange Dolan to a Dance-off! - The Dance off is an ancient tradition enforced by the Great Protector - the two sides pick their champion and then Dance until one side is defeated.

The next decision is who to send in as the Dancemaster of [Location Environment] City. One person springs to mind. (Drone NameDrone NumberHuman Last Name) 2655 Tesla

pre:
2655 Tesla Level 14[url] [url=http://orokos.com/roll/239360]Drone Bee
Stats)
Physical Stats = 5
Survival Stats = 3
Combat Stats = 4
Mental Penalties= 1

Skilled at:
Sexing the Ladies
Doesn't need internal organs to live.
Can increase their power level by screaming.
Too heavy to be moved involuntarily
Can take a punch
4 extra limbs
A backup brain
Purifying urine into something potable.
Night vision
Knows how to fight while drunk and/or high
Killing Voice
Bonus to using laser weapons
Killing Body Odour

Terrible at:
Lifespan
In love with a fictional character
Thier thinking was sound. Bees dance all the time, and with its extra legs and backup dance brain, 2655 Tesla was a perfect choice. Popular with the Fleshlights, its piercing voice made it a well known singer. The smell was a bit of a problem however.

The next thing to do was to choose a location. Worf decided that (Location Scale Location type) the Military Base of (erm… armourers table?) Stayin' Alive would be the host. A message was sent to Dolan.

One day later A messenger from Dolan returns. He is furious that a military base has been chosen for the neutral ground, but accepts the Dance off anyway. The messenger then reads out Dolon’s Dancemaster, and the hearts of the court sink.

pre:
Kirbu - Fuchsion Level 15 Mystic Punurge
Skills

Physical skills = 4
Mental Skills = 6
Combat Skills = 5
Negative Survival Skills = 5
skill rolls, (read left to right)

Skilled at:
Puns
Fast runner
SWOLE
Knows how to dance
Ridiculously buff
Levitation
Inflict Fear on opponent
Can swap people's minds.
Predict the future
The Force
Knows the forbbiden dance
Projectile vomiting
Has a glare that makes opponents surrender.
Bonus against multiple opponents
Always shoots first

Terrible at:
Good jokes
No sense of smell
Cuts himself
Is a fan of Bear Grylls
Hates trees
Kirbu is a perfect match for 2655 Tesla. Not only can he dance the forbidden dance, but the pink spherical creature has been eating powerful opponents all its life. Its list of skills is impressive, even 2655 Tesla’s terrible smell will not affect Kirbu.

The date for the competition is set for (four days ) hence. both sides are to arrive with their chosen Dance Master, then the Danceoff for [Location Environment] City can being!




Oh God, this gets better and better. Not only do we get a dance off, but the BBEG’s guy has TWO dance skills.
Although, I don’t think the people of [Location Environment] City are the good guys - just to let you know nlike any good Simulationist GM, I describe the situation, then roll for the result and apply it come what may. Hence the “neutal” army base result - that coupled with the comment I made about the Rubyions wanting to free their kin makes me think this is going to be one of those stories where the baddy turns out to be the good guy!

Table Talk
Obviously, I need a dance off table. This should go on the Quest Table sheet, most likely on a new tab. I plan to do it in a series of rounds, to make it more tense, and I’ll be running a first to the post in score. Therefore, I need a random target number table as well!

For the dance off, I’ll be making a skill check, which will be dice(depending on table size)+modifiers, modifiers are [level] in an appropriate skill. The table should be made up of a description, a score and possibly a modifier to either sides next roll. No “one side wins” or to high modifiers please.

i.e -
1- Dude dances badly +0 to dance score and -1 to his next roll
10 - Dude crotch thrusts at opponent, +2 Dance score, -5 to his opponent's next roll.

Finally, I’m going to need a “curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal” table for ideas what either side could do if the dance-off does not go their way - on the Decisions sheet please.

Sorry if the updates are a little short, I lost this one and had to redo it, and also I keep running out of tables! Once we have more tables and I’ve figured out my formatting a bit, we should get longer updates.

Also, statted characters take a while to generate :)

Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Hero of the soviet union.
Accidental destroyer of planets

Angrymog posted:

I think the journeys of both sides to the dance off location should be described.

Those encounter tables need some use.

Also it's Bees? not Bees.

You are absolutely right!

We do seem to be missing terrain tables though! I might [shudder] have to make something up! Thats a horrifying thought!

Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Hero of the soviet union.
Accidental destroyer of planets
The Dance-off Delegation (officially called the Krew) leaves [Location Environment] City. The journey to Stayin' Alive - a journey that will take 2 weeks.

The first week takes them through the barren lands around the city. There is a low chance of encountering something this close to the seat of power - (Encounter 20 or lower - rolled a 33) and nothing was seen. The rule of the Great Protector had not been kind on the terrain around the city, and there were few people to be seen.

The second week, Terrain + Encounter the landscape changes to that of the Fungal Doomworld that the base of Stayin’ Alive was built to protect against. (Encounter) The party is moving along the road when they are met by 3 Space Marines! - What the Marines are doing so deep into the Fungal Doomworlds is anybodies guess, but they are not friendly! and launch into an attack on the convoy!

Oh dear, it looks like we need some combat tables…..

And some NPC stat generators so we know how hard the Marines are!

Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Hero of the soviet union.
Accidental destroyer of planets
Combat Matrix Roll
= Both sides charge into legal battle. Proceedings take so long, each side forgets its original goal, and both agree to call off the whole thing!

Ahh, the bureaucracy of the Space Marines is legendary - when it becomes clear that neither side has properly filled in subsection C of form 1192/d/01f#, neither side can be bothered to submit the forms in triplicate and wait the requisite six months for them to come back. the combat it written up as a “misunderstanding” and not filed under Article 9.

The Danceoff party resumes their journey and arrives at Fort Stayin’ Alive. There the defending soldiers have just finished the daily burn-off of fungal spores. The landscape around them is surrounded by tree sized mushrooms that sprout mushrooms of their own. the ground is not covered in grass but in a thick layer of multi colored fungal growth. People wrap cloths around their mouths to prevent inhaling any of the 20 different deadly spores.

Dolan and his forces are already here, Kirbu can be seen flexing his formless body in preparation, 2655 Tesla also prepares.

The contest begins, and the Disco Ball of Fate is lowered into the room. Both sides cheer for their Dancemaster, and the Danceoff begins!

(Danceoff Target = 13)

2655 Tesla steps up first and begins to shake its honeymaker. (Danceoff round 1 =2) He launches right into the Truffle Shuffle! - A risky manuver (url=http://orokos.com/roll/240161]score +extra[/url]) Which impresses the Judges somewhat and 2566 Tesla notices a Candy Bar on the floor! it quickly retrieves the Heath and pockets it for later!

Kirbu responds. (1d4+5 = 7) - He does not mess around and goes right in with the electric slide! (round penalty+points[.url]) - bolts of power arc into 2655 Tesla and disrupts its grove. The Neutral ([url=http://orokos.com/roll/240165]Judge Race) Uplifted Rats on the judging panel squeak appreciatively.

#End of Round 1
2655 Tesla - 1 point, shocked for 4 rounds, Heath Bar.
Kirbu - 2 points.


The second round begins.
2655 Tesla tries to continue dancing amongst the arcing bolts of the electro slide - (Dance Round 2 at -2) - but the flashing lights and pain are too much for it, and it it beings to have a seizure (-4 points!)

Kirbu does not stop though, and starts phase 2 of his dance routine! It is time for the dreaded Disco Inferno! - 2655 Tesla goes up like Guy Fawkes and its screaming is only drowened out by the squaking-chants of the judges.

End of Round 2
2655 Tesla - -3 points, shocked for 3 rounds, On fire, rapidly melting Heath Bar.
Kirbu - 6 points.


Micheal Gauss and Worf Panic - they know that the Dance-off is lost as 2655 Tesla tries to fight through the pain, but can only think of the moves to Gangnam style (only result he can rolls now!) -
(Curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal!)

[b]In the midst of defeat, a squirrel charges into the dance floor carrying a jar of brain. "Chip, chip, chip!" It says. Then hands 2655 the backup brain of Michael Jackson![b]
With such an item of power in his hands, the whole scene changes in a moment! the fire burns off in a second and the bolts of electricity arc off in the most visually pleasing manner possible. 2655 Tesla suddenly stands before the crowd decked out in a rhinestone suit with matching hat and 5 gloves all worn down one side of the body.

The Danceoff continues, but as soon as 2655 Tesla begins to moonwalk like only a ten legged bee can moonwalk, it is obvious it is all over. As more squirrels pour from the sides to help him with a perfect rendition of “Thriller”, Kirbu begins to lose shape and collapses into a pool of goop just in time for 2655 Tesla to begin “Kirbu are you okay?”

The [Location Enviroment] Citians begin to cheer, but Dolan is furious! This is blatant cheating! and worse, it is Necromancy and Celebriomancy!


Another desicion table is needed, how will Dolan react to this chain of events?

Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Hero of the soviet union.
Accidental destroyer of planets
Dolan is Furious. He (Decision 3) sends his Rubyion’s to mug the brain of Michal Jackson!

All hell breaks loose as 2655 Tesla prepares to defend himself against 1d4) 4 Rubyions! .
(Combat Table) - Combat lasts 2 round. Attacker gets--2 penalty.
(Rubyion’s levels)

quote:

8 = -4 Combat penalty.

12 = -1 Combat bonus - (Bonus/Penalty chart)(Split + rolls) 2 Physical bonuses, 3 Physical penalties - Incredibly, insanely flexible, Can spit with deadly force. Has hair in awkward places x2, Nearsighted.

12 = -1 Combat bonus - (Bonus/Penalty chart) (Bonuses/Penalties)- 2 survival bonuses, 3 Physical Penalties. Can eat dead things safely. Knows how to hide his presence. Deaf in the other ear, Unwieldily long hair or other useless feature. Needs frequent transfusions of bodily fluids.

13 = no Combat bonus(url=http://orokos.com/roll/240508)Bonuses[/url]) - 4 Physical Bonuses (Bonuses) - Charming, Fast runner, 4 extra limbs, HUGE

No combatants yet have hitpoints

Not sure what Survival or physical scores are. Just going to go for level+3d6
(All the HP)
2655 Tesla = 23
Rubyion 1 = 21
Rubyion 2 = 24
Rubyion 3 = 21
Rubyion 4 = 20

Initiative!

2655 Tesla - (+14 (level), +1 Night vision) = 32
(Rubyion init rolls)
Rubyion 4 = 28 (+5 fast runner)
Rubyion 2 = 23 (-5 Nearsighted)
Rubyion 3 = 17 (-1 deaf in one ear)
Rubyion 1 = 9

Round 1 ---- FIGHT!

(2655 Tesla’s Stratergy) - 2655 Tesla moves first, and decides to Buff up! - (Success check +3 for screaming.) + 4 to attack rolls for next 6 rounds.
The fastest of the Rubyion’s moves next, deciding to Snipe from a distance, he Hits doing 3 points of damage

Next the nearsighted Rubyion makes aRanged attack, hits, doing 10 points of damage.

The slightly deaf Rubyion choses to launch a flurry of punches Being a limbless ruby, it realises this cannot do anything!

The slowest Rubyion’ course of action is to CHAAAAAAAAAAAARGE!. He misses, slamming into a wall like a Batman villan, doing 4 points of damage to himself!

Round 2 ---- FIGHT!

2655 Tesla, now properly buff, attempts to Mentally command Rubyion 3 - he is able to pull it off, and the Rubyion switches sides.

Rubyion 4 continues to attack 2655 Tesla. continueing to Snipe from a distance, he misses

Rubyion 2 begins the Dance of death - He pulls it off perfectly - (4 Leathal mental Damage rolls!) - Tesla 2566 is not ready for this, and his mind snaps like a twig - even Micheal Jacksons secondary brain is impressed by this skilled display of dancing!

Rubyion 3 attacks Rubyion 4 by Launching fireballs at it! the great balls of fire hit, causing 11 points of damage(Fire effect), roll again The fire just kind of peters out without doing anything interesting… but the Rubyion is disoriented and hits one of his own allies next turn!

He is of no interest now, as both Champions in the dance off have fallen![/i]

The Delegation from [Location Environment] city begin to scream murder, while Dolan’s forces are still imploring the judges to disqualify the now brain dead dancer for illegal use of a celebrity and backup dancers.

Things are beginning to look ugly!




We are going to need an escalation table now, to find out who wins. We could also use a table to decide if Rubyion 2 can advance to GMPC status!
I’m going to say both sides have other GMPC’s in the wings, and they will be generated when called upon. Will the Judges return order to the dance floor? Is this the start of general warfare? or will something totally random happen? only the dice (and your tables) can decide!

Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Hero of the soviet union.
Accidental destroyer of planets
Yeah, I've just been a bit busy over the festive period. I've not forgotten this though!

Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Hero of the soviet union.
Accidental destroyer of planets
Things Escalate!. Both sides declare war on each other, and their leaders decide to duke it out right here, right now. Initiate combat; keep on going until one side is dead!

Dolan and Micheal Gauss launch eat each others throats!

quote:


Dolan - Level 16[/b] Shadow Eater Assassin.
([url=http://orokos.com/roll/241736]Bonuses
Penalties)
Physical Bonuses = 1
Mental Bonuses = 4
Survival Bonuses = 4
Combat Bonuses = 1
Tech Penalties = 6
All the rolls

Good At:
Can make poison from anything
HUGE
Astral Projection
The Force
MINDCRUSH
Some degree of mind control
Stealthy
Expert counterfeiter
Knows how to hide his presence
Can hibernate for hundreds of years.
Won't die until the battle is over.

Terrible At:
Dislikes this modern world
Likes everything on Facebook x 2
Enemy of the Nanobots
Refuses to use anything but the latest model.
Bad at video games
Has cybernetic implants that malfunction 5% of the time. Roll on Sub-Table B to find out which organ it replaces - Appendix

HP = 20

Dolan is a Shadow Assasin. Huge and well developed in the matters of the force and mind control, he is the master of attacking from the shadows and the surprise attack. He has a love/hate relationship with technology.

quote:

Micheal Gauss - Level 8 Hivemind Bug Origami Black Belt
Bonuses/Penalties
Combat Bonuses = 9!!!!
Survival Penalties = 3
Tech Penalties = 4
All the rolls

Good At
Origami
Using opponent as human club
Killing Body Odour
Bonus to using laser weapons
Won't die until the battle is over. x2
Projectile vomiting
Bonus against multiple opponents
Good at hitting people in the nuts
Dodge melee attacks

Terrible At
Conventional uses for paper
Eats meat raw
Stuffy nose
Gets panic attacks when cut off from civilization.
Infected with a computer virus.
Can't drive anything with wheels
Penalty on disarming traps
Refuses to use anything but the latest model.

HP =24

Micheal Gauss rose to fame as a master paper folder, but his many combat abilities cemented his fame and allowed him to become leader of [Location Environment] City. He is pretty useless when he does not have an army of servants and fans around him.

Round 1! FIGHT!
Initutive!
Dolan = 36
Micheal Gauss = 13

Moving with all the speed and grace of a Shadow Assassin, Dolan reacts first, he decides to make a Verbal assault on Gauss - he pulls his logbook from his pocket, logs onto Facebook and dislikes a post by Guass! This shocking display shocks the Hivemind leader. (-6 for 4 rounds!)

Gauss responds with a CHAAAAAAAAAAAARGE! - he Hits, doing (/Damage dice) 8 points of damage - He and Dolan are carried across the Dance floor and into a far wall.

Dolan = 12/20 HP
Micheal Gauss = 24/24 HP


Round 2! FIGHT!

As he slams into Dolan, he Brings his Sparkblade down - it cuts into Gauss for 10 points of damage. Icor begins to spray.

Guass is forced to fight defensively against this attack, This causes Dolan to miss his next attack! and is -2 for his next two combat rolls as he tries to penitrate Gauss’s numerous feints and parries.

Dolan = 12/20 HP
Micheal Gauss = 14/24 HP

Round 3! FIGHT!

Flipping back from Dolan, Gauss Peforms a ranged attack with his laser pistol - something he is skilled at! He scrapes a hit and does a massive 12 damage! - The bolt looks like its going to miss for a second, then slams into the head of Dolan, who becks backwards in a shadowy gout of blood.

Hitting the floor, the Rubyions flood around their fallen leader and spirit the body away. But what of the Rubyion that killed 2655 Tesla? it does nothing.



The Great Mugging Crisis is over, but many ask, Dolon is renowned for not dying before the battle is over, and is the battle truly over?

There is no time to wonder though, as 1 month later news arrives of TWO new crises!

In the (Compass Direction) North news comes of (Evil Plot Rolling em twice!) - A vast international conspiracy to see the future! While from the West there are rumblings of (Plot 2) someone is meddling with a plan to go about Poking Cthulhu!

What should the reactions to these two plots be? Can they respond to both?

Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Hero of the soviet union.
Accidental destroyer of planets
A decision is made to enter a rock-paper-scissors double elimination tournament to win a grand prize of 1,000,000 [Currency].

What does this have to do with the looming threats? Nothing! Its a sad state of affairs, but both the treats are far away, and the people of [Location Environment] city are close. They string of muggings has left many a Fleshlight and Shoemaker Elf unable to pay their taxes! The squirrels, being horders, are of course unaffect. This has only lead to an increase in Elf and Fleshlight on Squirrel violence. The Government needs an injection of cash to keep it solvent!

Micheal Gauss calls for the greatest Rock-Paper-Scissors player…. A shadow eater called DOLAN!!!
(dun-Dun-DUN!!!!) - people gasp, is this the same dolan? with gaseous forms like the Shadow Eaters, there is no way to be sure. Rumours being to circulate, from Clones to brainwashing, to hidden deals. No one is sure!

quote:

(Character Gen rolls])
Actually Is Dolan - Level 19 Shadow eater Technofetishist
39 HP

(Bonus/penalty numbers)
Tech Bonuses = 15
Physical Penalties = 2
Mental Penalties = 3
Survival Penalties = 4
(All dem rolls)
(subtables)


Good at -
Sex with robots
Is a cyborg. Can repair themselves.
Identify and use unknown electrical object
Can use a lawnmower x2
Identify and use unknown mechanical object
Repairs energy weapons with ease x2
Skilled in operating medical technology x3
Good at video games
Has a jetpack and isn't afraid to use it
Friend of the Nanobots
Understands basic scientific methods
High chance of carrying just the right spare part


Terrible at -
dealing with other living creatures
Morbidly obese
Deaf in one ear
No confidence whatsoever
Porn addict
Thinks they are immune to a result from Carbon
Hates trees
Hated by Animals (Humans)
Gets panic attacks when cut off from civilization.
Is a fan of Bear Grylls

Guass addresses the frightened population.

“People of [Location Environment] City! Be not afraid. This is infact the remains of Dolan! The Rubyons were happy to hand over his body in exchange for a armistice. We have the Technology, so we have rebuilt him!”

Stunned Silence - its pretty impressive how they have managed to graft cybernetic implants onto a ball of gas…..

“Do no worry, he is not the monster you once knew. we have worked technomagic to instill a fierce loyalty into him! he will now represent us in the grand Rock Paper Scissors Championship!

Day of the competition dawns. and the much larger remains of Dolan takes it seat at the first round.

I don’t think tables would help us here, so I’m just going to rolling a D3 for both sides - 1 = rock 2= Paper 3=Scissors. I’ll roll 5 times to give best of three. There will be five rounds Then we can get back to more important decisions!


(Round 1), and Dolan is facing a Fleshlight, he goes scissors against paper, then paper against scissors. 1 each. next up Dolan uses a rock to smash his opponents scissors then again is hit in the reversal! The deciding round is started with double scissors.
With the next win taking the round, Dolan pulls out paper and wraps the rock!

(Round 2) - This time, facing another Shadow Eater. Double scissors starts, then Dolan cuts the paper. He does it again before double rocking. His opponent sweats as much as a ball of gas can sweat before falling for the same ploy!

(Round 3) And a half human matchs up to a quivering Dolan. Double paper is followed by the Human cutting Dolan. Double Paper and Double Scissors follow, then Dolan allows himself to be wrapped! 2-0 down! Then he smashes his opponent’s scissors. This is a short recovery thought as the Rock is once more wrapped.

(Round 4) - This is double elimination, so he’s not out yet! A Rubyon is his next opponent, who gets cut right away. Double paper is followed by Dolan getting cut. he then wraps his opponent who cuts him back. Down to the final point, Dolan goes for good old, dependable rock and is wrapped up and out of the competition when the Rubyion goes paper!

Dreams of tax relief shatter, and some hard truths are going to be looked at.




I hope you don’t mind me skipping the tables for the RPS game. We have a lot more interesting things to make tables for!

Firstly, the return of Dolan - the RNG is a gift that keeps on giving. The name generated says “Actually Dolan” so I rolled with it. Especially when I rolled him up as a cyborg!

Next up, we need to find out how the people of [Location Environment] City respond to the need for taxes. Then we have two evil plots that have been ignored. Lets have advancement tables for them as well!

Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Hero of the soviet union.
Accidental destroyer of planets
well, with orokus doing pretty much any random number, I may as well rescind the table limits.

Go whole hog!

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Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Hero of the soviet union.
Accidental destroyer of planets
Things are not good in [Location Environment] City. without the desperately needed [Currency], the people Revolt! Micheal Gauss and Worf are forced to flee into the Fungal zone before they are dragged off to Madam Mess Eviscerator.

12 Months of chaos ensue, and the Government that comes out of it is unrecognisable, and the city is now a ( State rolls) Empire ruled by an executive council. (More state rolls) The Head of State is The Head of Government, only bound by the law, while The Executive has significant powers, implied, constitutional and delegated by legislature. The constitution leaves the Government unbound by previous laws or precedent with no significant opposition. The Voting system is Plurality.

The members of the Head of State council call themselves Kings and Queens, and there are 16 of them. This has thrown away the last semblance of the Great Protectors rules and laws, and a new dawn has begun for the city.

it may quickly turn once more to dusk though, as the threats have not been quiet in the last year - In the North, the vast international conspiracy to see the future has Unleashed a Temporal rift that erased all Fleshlights from existence. - They have been replaced by Shadoweaters. - not that most people can remember this. now Fleshlights are only remembered as a gimmick sex toy, not as a proud , erm, businesslike race! Is this a mistake, or part of a sinister and overly elaborate plot?

The Plot to poke Cthulhu meanwhile, has lead to Steampunk discovering the Cthulhu Mythos - the Memetic saturation that has occurred has produced a huge number of jokes that were funny once before being beaten to death by people who think they have a sense of humour but don’t. This cunning plan has lead to people no longer even considering Cthulhu to be a threat! So used are they to seeing his cheery face on the side of kid’s cog-shaped lunch boxes that he is no longer a figure of terror and insanity!

The Kings and Queens of the the Executive Council meet. for the first time, the topic of discussion is outside the walls of [Location Environment] City. The Shoemaker Elves shadoweaters and Squirrels are content with the new rulers for now, but what should the council do?

Some say they cannot be an Empire with only one city, some say the Conspiracy or the Cthulhu plot should take precedence, others have an insular look on things. This discussion will shape the fate of the [Location Environment] Empire!



What do the council decide to do? I may need an expanded table of plot advancement if they once more look inwards rather than outwards.

To be honest, after the terrible decisions of Worf and Micheal Gauss , I’m not surprised that there was a revolution, now maybe the new government will do good, rather than a series of rather evil decisions.

Or maybe this is a new wave of terror - only the tables can decide! remember they now have no upper limit! the more randomness the better!

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