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For_Great_Justice
Apr 21, 2010

JUST CAN'T SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT HOW MUCH I HATE GAMES WORKSHOP!


Roomate has a tuxedo.

So far this cat in 2 years has cost him a pretty expensive guitar in vet bills, has digestive issues so has to be on a schedule yet is the hungriest bastard on 4 legs.

He's chewed through an unknown amount of food stuffs, sticks his face into every cup and plate. He recently chewed into a half a bag of hot dog buns.

Yowls like the neediest thing for hours. I mean hours.

The most determined cat alive to get into any room he is not allowed in including attacking the door knob until he is in.

Broke a shelf and window still cat bed by Batista Bombing off higher shelves.

Brained himself trying to jump through aquarium glass.

Killed two tree frogs by knocking the habitat over.

Looks styling in his pink bowtie. Picture mot available as none are on my phone.

Goes by the name Albert.

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Kyrosiris
May 24, 2006

You try to be happy when everyone is summoning you everywhere to "be their friend".



Partner sent me this on snapchat while I was at work. I feel like it speaks for itself.

Fleta Mcgurn
Oct 5, 2003

Porpoise noise continues.


#JustTuxedoThings~~~~

- smelling your own rear end and then loudly complaining about the odor

- falling in love with a stranger's toolbelt and rubbing your entire body over it

- sulking because even though you brought the Food Giants your very BEST toys, like old Q-tips and twist-ties, and you put them RIGHT THERE in their weird head fur, they didn't wake up and play with you

- eating a shrimp while trilling and blowing shrimp chunks all over

- double-fisting from two food bowls at once because you beat up your mentally-challenged sister, who is at least three times your size

- yelling at Mummy for five straight minutes at 3 AM until she gets up just so you could watch her pee

small ghost
Jan 30, 2013



Fleta Mcgurn posted:


- eating a shrimp while trilling and blowing shrimp chunks all over


My tux is no longer allowed the cat food with whole shrimps in because he insists on doing this on my pillow.

Fleta Mcgurn
Oct 5, 2003

Porpoise noise continues.


small ghost posted:

My tux is no longer allowed the cat food with whole shrimps in because he insists on doing this on my pillow.

She got cat food ON THE CEILING

iospace
Jan 19, 2038




Fun Shoe

Fleta Mcgurn posted:

She got cat food ON THE CEILING

Post the shithead.

Black Griffon
Mar 12, 2005

Now, in the quantum moment before the closure, when all become one. One moment left. One point of space and time.

I know who you are.

You are destiny.





Hey Toff you dumb poo poo. When you've been to the vet and come home knocked the gently caress out and I put your cage in my room and you keep being completely loving comatose and just let poo poo and piss fall out of you and then drowsily escape to the closet and I go to to bed a bit later



Don't hop up on my bed and rub your unwashed rear end directly on my elbow while purring like a dimwit. Disgusting. You smell bad enough, but getting actual poo poo on me is next level.

Black Griffon fucked around with this message at 20:19 on Jan 27, 2020

Fleta Mcgurn
Oct 5, 2003

Porpoise noise continues.


iospace posted:

Post the shithead.

bidet-nappin' boo


spine-twistin' boo

(yes, that's my bra. oh well)

sitting-on-a-throw-pillow-directly-in-front-of-her-actual-bed'n boo


experimentin'-with-physics boo


chair-stealin' boo


bonus: v smol boo



in summary: a boo


edit: LMAOOOOOOOO

Fleta Mcgurn fucked around with this message at 20:46 on Jan 27, 2020

Bust Rodd
Oct 21, 2008

TURDS BOD



This is Cosmo AKA Cosmeow AKA Momo the Clown

This is him screaming at me the literal microsecond I get home from work until I dump his evening meal into his bowl. He also reserves the right to cry as though he is being starved to death in a cage of wolves at 6 AM, 7 AM, and again at 8 AM (when I wake up for work). He eats twice a day, plus treats, but I had terrible roommates in college who have irreparably trained him to cry until his bottomless pit of a chubbo tum-tum has kitty snacks. Please, my little Pumpkin Prince, shut the gently caress up.

Randaconda
Jul 3, 2014

The preceding post has been paid for by the new World order.



tag urself, i'm the random person in the bacl

MrYenko
Jun 17, 2012

#2 isn't ALWAYS bad...


Pictured: Dumbshits.

teh winnar!
Apr 16, 2003




What the hell, Bear? First you try to trick me into falling back asleep by cuddling up to me and getting lots of pettins, then as soon as I stop and start drifting off, you bite the poo poo out of my NOSE. Both nostrils are bruised and the outside is actually bleeding.

Dude... un-cool!

Star Man
Jun 1, 2008

A constellation of faces.


Idiot.





Fleta Mcgurn
Oct 5, 2003

Porpoise noise continues.


Aleta, you precious psycho, STOP LICKING MY ARMPITS WHILE I'M SLEEPING.

Dirt Road Junglist
Oct 8, 2010

There's a ghost in me
Who wants to say I'm sorry
Doesn't mean I'm sorry






Fleta Mcgurn posted:

Aleta, you precious psycho, STOP LICKING MY ARMPITS WHILE I'M SLEEPING.

Better or worse than being awakened by your cat's stankity fish-breath because he decided to wake you by licking your nose?

iospace
Jan 19, 2038




Fun Shoe

Fleta Mcgurn posted:

Aleta, you precious psycho, STOP LICKING MY ARMPITS WHILE I'M SLEEPING.



Dirt Road Junglist posted:

Better or worse than being awakened by your cat's stankity fish-breath because he decided to wake you by licking your nose?

Post the offenders

Dirt Road Junglist
Oct 8, 2010

There's a ghost in me
Who wants to say I'm sorry
Doesn't mean I'm sorry






iospace posted:

Post the offenders



He's mad because I won't let him sleep on my wrist while I type. Honey, it's cute, but you're making mom's wrists hurt, please stop.

Bust Rodd
Oct 21, 2008

TURDS BOD



Azalea, I understand that you donít get enough attention from your mommy, and I do my very best to give you all the love you deserve when I nanny for you, but the $4,000 couch (pictured here) that you destroyed by eating a fancy pen and rolling around in it is... well the resale value is looking pretty grim. Please, Azalea, stick to the 200 kinds of dog treats she buys you and leave her expensive Doctor pens ALONE

DarkSoulsTantrum
Apr 6, 2011

this kills the crab

Sure, they're visually impressive, but a lot of posters find large avatars physically uncomfortable. Furthermore, the owners of large avatars often rely on their size alone and don't bother to develop more refined posting techniques.


Grimey Drawer

Bust Rodd posted:


Azalea, I understand that you donít get enough attention from your mommy, and I do my very best to give you all the love you deserve when I nanny for you, but the $4,000 couch (pictured here) that you destroyed by eating a fancy pen and rolling around in it is... well the resale value is looking pretty grim. Please, Azalea, stick to the 200 kinds of dog treats she buys you and leave her expensive Doctor pens ALONE

Azalea is a good girl for teaching her owner that buying a $4000 white couch is dumb as hell when you have a dog.

Black Griffon
Mar 12, 2005

Now, in the quantum moment before the closure, when all become one. One moment left. One point of space and time.

I know who you are.

You are destiny.





more like azalea just helldumped butt rodd fukken OWNED

Fleta Mcgurn
Oct 5, 2003

Porpoise noise continues.


iospace posted:

Post the offenders

Scroll up! There's a boo-rear end boo about 7 posts up from this.

mind the walrus
Sep 22, 2006



DarkSoulsTantrum posted:

Azalea is a good girl for teaching her owner that buying a $4000 white couch is dumb as hell when you have a dog.

YeahTubaMike
Mar 24, 2005

*hic* Gotta finish thish . . .


Doctor Rope

Dirt Road Junglist posted:

Better or worse than being awakened by your cat's stankity fish-breath because he decided to wake you by licking your nose?

My cat likes to chew on my eyelids so I have to keep my bedroom door closed.

D34THROW
Jan 29, 2012

RETAIL RETAIL LISTEN TO ME BITCH ABOUT RETAIL


Dirt Road Junglist posted:



He's mad because I won't let him sleep on my wrist while I type. Honey, it's cute, but you're making mom's wrists hurt, please stop.

He reminds me of my Bootsy! He likes to walk across my keyboard and headbutt my face while I type.

Princess, stop loving sleeping 2 inches from my wife's face. She can't breathe and it's weird when I wake up and my cat is petting my wife.

Bremma
Sep 7, 2007

She was a terrible creature and did not deserve our love


Ayla

Lay the gently caress down

Stop pacing on the edge of the covers at 4am or walking on my hair

Iron Crowned
May 6, 2003


Yams Fan

Bremma posted:

Ayla

Lay the gently caress down

Stop pacing on the edge of the covers at 4am or walking on my hair

Is cat, functioning as normal.

Camrath
Mar 19, 2004




Digby, youíre a magnificent, majestic creature. Youíre also better bred than I am.

So will you please stop with the following:

1. Attacking my feet when Iím fast asleep, making me yelp and scaring my wife.

2. Constantly trying to Ďplayí with Bob. Yes heís a grumpy sod, but you need to respect his boundaries.

3. Clean your goddamned arse and stop smelling of poo.

4. Learn to purr. You have literally one job in life ffs!



Bob, I know youíve had a rough life and I respect your boundaries, but it would be nice if you tolerated affection from time to time on our terms. Also Digby is not trying to annoy you every time he walks past; heís big and rambunctious but you donít need to swear and swipe when heís within two feet of you for any reason.

zakharov
Nov 30, 2002

Tater Love


Based on these pictures I would not have guessed Bob was the grouch.

Camrath
Mar 19, 2004




zakharov posted:

Based on these pictures I would not have guessed Bob was the grouch.

Bob is.. complicated. He used to belong to our neighbour, who has a home life thatís chaotic at best, insane at worst. Poor thing was living in their play-house in the garden in the middle of winter; my wife took pity on him and started leaving him hot water bottles and tuna, then basically catnapped him.

He wouldnít let us touch him at all for the first year or so, and was super bitey (he gave me an enormous abscess in my arm), though if we were lying in bed heíd climb on us and purr.

Now heís a bit more chill, and is hopelessly bonded to the wife. She calls him her familiar.

Digby meanwhile is just this massive ball of energy. Having had old cats for years a Maine coon kitten was a bit of a change-up lol

Bust Rodd
Oct 21, 2008

TURDS BOD


they are both so beautiful I want to cry

ShootaBoy
Jan 6, 2010

Anime is Bad.
Except for Pokemon, Valkyria Chronicles and 100% OJ.


Digby's got that Ron Perlman look going on.

Faerie Fortune
Nov 13, 2004



Rocky and Rubble

Stop being so cute, my friends keep asking if they can buy you and then getting mad when they realise how much a purebred english bulldog puppy actually sells for, and how far away my sister (who actually has these dogs) lives from where we are. I know they're cute but why are you getting mad at me for it??

Picture tax;


small ghost
Jan 30, 2013



Momo please learn to eat without someone cuddling you the whole time and stop trying to share bowls with Macready, he doesn't like it.

Macready you have no compunctions beating the poo poo out of Momo at any other time, just smack him when he tries to share your bowl instead of looking at me forlornly and sulking. He's not even trying to steal your food, he just likes to eat with you. You spent a whole year stealing his kitten food at every opportunity so I'm not sympathetic tbh.

Fleta Mcgurn
Oct 5, 2003

Porpoise noise continues.


Aleta, when I said I needed help editing, this is not what I meant:


Please don't call the po-po.

Also, remember the other day when you decided to put your foot right on a candle flame? Don't do that again, either, please.

ChickenWing
Jul 22, 2010



Fun Shoe

For gently caress's sake Leona you just got spayed it's like you know every way to rip a stitch and you'd like to try them all at once, thanks.

I appreciate you finally figuring out that the kong is more fun when you chew it instead of trying to lick it to death, though

Wiggity
Oct 22, 2016

Old school cool
Now with all of the millenial bullshit

I LOVE welding on things where chlorinated solvents are present - Phosgene ams your friend!




Chip, you are the worst. I understand that you are just a puppy but for fucks sake STOP EATING MY FURNITURE. You cannot digest pleather, stuffing, upholstery pins, or anything else you may find on or in furniture. You broke one of your teeth clean in half somehow (probably chewing metal legs) and now I have to check you and make sure it doesn't get infected before you lose it.

It would also be nice to just once wake up on my own, not because you are slapping me in the face with your paws, trying to dig into my chest/rip my heart out, or straight up sitting with your butthole right on my face. I don't enjoy any of these things, but you clearly do (somehow the pain from chest digging outweighs how gross the butthole on my face is). I know that you're a lab and you think that you will never get food again starting the instant you finish eating, but waking me up unpleasantly and earlier every morning so that I MIGHT feed you (i never do) does nothing but piss me off. If you do this kinda poo poo when you're 70+lbs, we're gonna have problems.

Then your dumbass does this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vyJqy0rMiwo
As funny as it was, I had to help you out of it. HOW ARE YOU SMART ENOUGH TO KNOW EXACTLY WHEN YOU GET FOOD (8AM/6PM) YET GET YOURSELF STUCK IN A WAY YOU CAN'T ESCAPE?

Wiggity fucked around with this message at 23:22 on Feb 27, 2020

Black Griffon
Mar 12, 2005

Now, in the quantum moment before the closure, when all become one. One moment left. One point of space and time.

I know who you are.

You are destiny.





Wiggity posted:

Then your dumbass does this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vyJqy0rMiwo
As funny as it was, I had to help you out of it. HOW ARE YOU SMART ENOUGH TO KNOW EXACTLY WHEN YOU GET FOOD (8AM/6PM) YET GET YOURSELF STUCK IN A WAY YOU CAN'T ESCAPE?

dog in an exoskeleton

InvisibleMonkey
Jun 4, 2004


Hey, girl.

We were gone for less than an hour and apparently also left a bag of bread out.

Plus the perp, refusing to look at me or at what she did.

https://twitter.com/invisiblemonkey...650983264079872

Zodiac5000
Jun 19, 2006

Protects the Pack!

Doctor Rope

God damnit DB Cooper stop sleeping on my noodles you fat gently caress! Go to bed in the many towers around the apartment, stop breaking into the cupboard!

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Mister Speaker
May 8, 2007



Fallen Rib

I got this funky little three-in-one lens from Lensbaby because I apparently am addicted to new glass and it's got some really neat bokeh effects. Natch, first thing I shot was my kitters.







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