helldump your pets [petshaming ITT]

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Pet Island > helldump your pets [petshaming ITT]

BigBallChunkyTime: Nov 25, 2011; Kyle Schwarber: World Series hero, Beefy Lad, better than you.; Illegal Hen

Dear cat,

I swear to god if you nip my arm one more time because you want me to feed you I'm going to punt you like a little furry yellow football.

Dear other cat,

Stop pissing on the clean laundry. Next time I piss on you.

Dear dog,

You're great with the kids, but you're quite possibly the dumbest creature on the planet. Also, stop eating your poo poo and puking it up. And stop whining at me when there is no room for you on the furniture. You're a loving dog. Lay on the floor, like every other dog.

BigBallChunkyTime fucked around with this message at 05:47 on Mar 13, 2016

# ¿ Mar 13, 2016 05:42

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# ¿ Apr 26, 2024 17:26

BigBallChunkyTime: Nov 25, 2011; Kyle Schwarber: World Series hero, Beefy Lad, better than you.; Illegal Hen

SneakyFrog posted:

"Dear animals, stop acting like animals, get a loving JOB and contribute around here, and pick up my dry cleaning ffs, its been there for weeks."

Right?

# ¿ Mar 13, 2016 16:12

BigBallChunkyTime: Nov 25, 2011; Kyle Schwarber: World Series hero, Beefy Lad, better than you.; Illegal Hen

Laundry-pissing cat,

Stop taking socks and putting them in your water dish. They are not mice, and you don't drown mice in water anyway you stupid moron.

# ¿ Mar 13, 2016 16:22

BigBallChunkyTime: Nov 25, 2011; Kyle Schwarber: World Series hero, Beefy Lad, better than you.; Illegal Hen

Beemer, stop loving howling directly outside my bedroom door at 3 in the morning because you want wet food instead of the dry food in your dish.

# ¿ Dec 13, 2019 22:45

BigBallChunkyTime: Nov 25, 2011; Kyle Schwarber: World Series hero, Beefy Lad, better than you.; Illegal Hen

Beemer, Midnight, and/or Gizmo:

Which one of you little assholes pissed on the clean laundry? Now I habe to do it over again which takes twice as long as it should with our piece of poo poo dryer.

# ¿ Jan 8, 2020 15:04

BigBallChunkyTime: Nov 25, 2011; Kyle Schwarber: World Series hero, Beefy Lad, better than you.; Illegal Hen

Had to put down the dumbest idiot and bestest boy ever today. He went suddenly. He was fine this morning, collapsed around noon, and was gone before 3. A tumor was leaking blood into his belly. He was 11 years old. I love you, Booth, you dumbass. May there be endless walks and infinite piles of people food on the other side. Also, hopefully you won't get your leash tangled up when they let you outside. It's not that hard to go around a single rock!

God, I miss you.

Forgive my leg and my daughter's foot.

# ¿ Mar 21, 2020 05:59

BigBallChunkyTime: Nov 25, 2011; Kyle Schwarber: World Series hero, Beefy Lad, better than you.; Illegal Hen

Dirt Road Junglist posted:

Oh no, I'm so sorry

My fur jerk has a tumor on his leg. I had it looked at in February, before poo poo got wild, and the advice was to wait 3 months and come back in May for a re-evaluation. In the meantime, it's gone from the size of a small lemon to the size of a large orange. Meanwhile, the vet's office has emailed to say they're only doing emergency care and end of life care, because the state of Oregon wants them to be able to donate supplies to human hospitals if needed.

I don't know if it's an emergency, but...it's not NOT an emergency? And also, I live alone and he's my only companion at the moment. And we're about to go under quarantine in the Portland Metro.

I don't know what to do And what happened to Booth makes it sound like it could be more of an issue than I thought.

Is there emergency vet care in your area? I'm in Wisconsin and there's that service for me but I'd have to drive 45 minutes for pet 911. My local vet only keeps normal business hours during the week.

# ¿ Mar 21, 2020 06:22

BigBallChunkyTime: Nov 25, 2011; Kyle Schwarber: World Series hero, Beefy Lad, better than you.; Illegal Hen

Lightning Knight posted:

Look at this little poo poo

Oh yeah, (s)he's plotting something.

# ¿ May 16, 2020 15:23

BigBallChunkyTime: Nov 25, 2011; Kyle Schwarber: World Series hero, Beefy Lad, better than you.; Illegal Hen

Beemer? Gizmo? Midnight? Which one of you keeps pissing on the clean laundr

# ¿ Sep 18, 2020 04:54

BigBallChunkyTime: Nov 25, 2011; Kyle Schwarber: World Series hero, Beefy Lad, better than you.; Illegal Hen

Rocky, why do you find literally everything you're NOT supposed to have and pay no attention to your toys?

# ¿ Sep 30, 2020 21:07

BigBallChunkyTime: Nov 25, 2011; Kyle Schwarber: World Series hero, Beefy Lad, better than you.; Illegal Hen

rye on white posted:

STOP jumping in the shower and getting mad you get wet. it's pretty funny but you need to stop doing this to yourself

I have a Siamese that actively wants to get wet. He comes in to say hi to me when I take a shower, and then he just.... lingers. It's weird.

# ¿ Jun 14, 2021 16:36

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# ¿ Apr 26, 2024 17:26

BigBallChunkyTime: Nov 25, 2011; Kyle Schwarber: World Series hero, Beefy Lad, better than you.; Illegal Hen

Party Boat posted:

this idiot:

- was so excited about being near the river that she fell down a four foot drop into it
- was too upset by this to swim to a part where she could easily get out
- required me to wade in and rescue her
- was completely unharmed and learned nothing from the experience

She's not sorry. Not even a little.

# ¿ Jun 19, 2023 00:51

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Pet Island > helldump your pets [petshaming ITT]