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Cricket
This poll is closed.
Blackface in crowd 129 55.36%
References to Lord of the Rings 104 44.64%
Total: 233 votes
[Edit Poll (moderators only)]

 
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garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
Aleem Dar is the worst loving umpire, jesus christ.
It's like he went "That might be out, gently caress it, give it and they can review". Absolute pillock

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garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
I wish I had a time machine so I could go back in time 1 month and tell myself the second test depends on the batting of TPaine and SMarsh, what the gently caress.

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
Steve Smart just dropped, I mean, didn't review, the Ashes

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo

The Rabbi T. White posted:

That was loving daft. I don't think the umpire's decision was awful - he was wrong as DRS showed, but it wasn't a howler as it was heading down leg. But it was obviously close enough that even it wasn't out, it would've been ump's call and they wouldn't have lost their review - so not doing so was stupid.

e: was that Starc flipping off the Barmy Army?

I think Starc was upset they said his bouncer was above the shoulder, because it wasn't. He was pissed with the square leg ump.

To be honest about the lbw, live I said "not out, going down", so the ump wasn't to blame.

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo

The Rabbi T. White posted:

I know this probably isn't advice that Australia will heed, but having your two strike bowlers throwing shade at the people officiating your game could cause them to not rule in your favour during borderline decisions.

You mean act like an adult?

That's unAustralian.

Whinge and complain is the Aussie way!

But I called it, Poms are gonna walk this in. loving lolstralia

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
No matter who wins from here always remember, both teams are complete poo poo and should be mocked. All players and umps executed.

Except Lyon, he's dreamy

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo

tarbrush posted:

In related news, I only just caught up with the wickets from yesterday and my goodness Smith should never have been given.

That one was strange because I agree he was unlucky to be out, but the one beforehand I think he should have been out, I think DRS is poo poo and it totally pitched in line.

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
I think Smith should lose his review privileges

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
Root got the poo poo bagged out of him early in the match, but holy poo poo has Smith been worse. No runs, poo poo reviews, poo poo bouncing the tail tactics, poo poo non follow on enforcing, poo poo catching. I think if he doesn't score runs, Smith is a bad cricketer.

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo

Burn Down Canberra posted:

Captaincy is overrated to a pretty large degree. A captain normally looks good because of his players. that said where a captain can look good is doing things like enforcing the follow on like he should have last night.

True. Maybe I'm just upset he dropped a catch off Gary, the best cricketer. I hate Wade for it, so I guess Smith is the new Wade

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
Can't believe anyone thinks Australia are still a chance. Look at Smith and Starcs faces. They know they're hosed. The series is gone. Ashes stay in Pomgolia

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
I hope theres a biff. Way things are going, Root would knock Handscomb the gently caress out.

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
As a straight man, Pat Cummins is beautiful and I would be heaps gay for him.

England still gonna win but.

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo

EMC posted:

He'd cummins you

Unlike the other Aussie quicks, he wouldn't spray it down my legside.

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo

Mister Chief posted:

Any Australian who says England are in with a chance is doing this.

I'm Australian. I hate England and want them to lose.

I legitimately think England are going to win and Australia have been on the backfoot ever since the Woakes/Overton partnership in the first innings.

Besides, I thought a Spoonboying had to be completely unintentional to work.

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo

RideTheSpiral posted:

lol australians are so butthurt

I should add I want to beat the poo poo out of most Australian players, commentators and selectors. The fact that Australia are poo poo seems to escape them and they all actually seem to believe all that "Three deadly fast bowlers will make the poms poo poo themselves and fall on the stumps!" bullshit.

Even a loss probably won't make them realize that the team is carried by Smiths batting and major changes to the entire setup are needed.

This has been obvious for years and nothing is done.

P.S. England are also poo poo and the way dickheads like George Dobell carry on about Stokes is terrible.

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
I don't think he hit that, but I have no explanation for the spike on snicko

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
Ok, I was wrong, England have blown it

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
Like Smith in the 2nd innings I think Ali can feel a bit dirty

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
Don't forget.

Two bad teams.

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
What I still don't like as an Aussie is the fact that at the presentation Smith was asked if not enforcing the follow on was a mistake and he basically said "Well, we won so who cares? If we lost I'd think about it, but we didn't, no need to reflect on mistakes and improve!"

Like, the team will never improve unless they try to learn lessons, even if it doesn't matter in the end and they win.

Sometimes I think cricketers might be as dumb as rugby league players, they're like only two molested dogs away from being the same.

Both Cummins and Lyon are going to bowl worse than they did in this innings, at some point in this series, but actually take like five wickets each. If you watched the way each Australian bowled, Starc was far and away the worst but somehow he gets the five for. poo poo gets wickets? It would explain Shane Warne.

Cricket just doesn't make sense.

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
Holy poo poo, allegations of match fixing ahead of the third test being reported on Sky News.

From the Sun in the UK, does anyone have more details?

https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/5133944/sun-investigation-smashes-bookies-multi-million-pound-plot-to-rig-third-ashes-test/

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
Australia would be on top if not for MMarsh.
Clearly he was the match fixer, send him to jail.
Maxwell would have taken the catch.
Root is going to be so angry with himself

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
Can they call Stoneman back after he's left the field?

I thought they couldn't, so why were they checking again?

I don't think he was out

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
Renshaw would have caught that

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
Fancy letting a ginger score a 100.

Shameful

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo

a real chump posted:

you know who else was ginger and had no obvious flaws...

...hitler?

The queen?

Oh, the Duke of Bellington!

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
How was that inline?

I don't trust the ball tracking

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
Scientists are still collating data and running tests but it seems Smith is better than all the other batsmen combined. Yes, even the Marshes.

Australia would be hosed without his batting. Captaincy needs work though.

Data also shows Root is confirmed fraud.

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
That was out so no problem, but...

That was far more inline than Bancrofts lbw, yet it was umpire's call here and totally inline on Bancrofts. Visually it looks totally opposite to that.

The ball tracking is hosed up.

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo

RideTheSpiral posted:

its because he’s got the worlds most annoying and irking voice

It's his laugh that shits me, I can see why his teammates hated him

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
If MMarsh scores a 100, they should cancel test cricket. Embarrassing.

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
Australia have scored 4 centuries this series.

Two by Smith and two by the Marshes.

Two Marshes= 1 Smith?

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
Good to have the real MMarsh back

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
Why the gently caress are Australia still batting?

They need 10 wickets not more runs.

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
Obviously he min/maxed and put all his points into batting and fielding and treated captaincy and reviewing as dump stats.

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
Unlucky but lol anyway.

Cook and Root both frauds

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
Poor Vince, that poo poo was literally unplayable

garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
I feel someone should remind the commentators that Australia haven't regained the Ashes yet

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garycoleisgod
Sep 27, 2004
Boo
Just play, who cares about fairness?

But how the gently caress did water get through in only one spot? Did moths get to the covers?

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