GODSPEED JOHN GLENN posted:

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN posted:

funny headlines aren't that funny, it turns out

Stormyish posted:

Iggy Koopa posted:

this about me and is the real reason i cant get a job

http://www.thefountainpen.com/cgi-bin/showstory?id=8165

Iggy Koopa posted:

this about me and is the real reason i cant get a job

http://www.thefountainpen.com/cgi-bin/showstory?id=8165

Iggy Koopa posted:

on the positive side of things prison terrified me and i havent so much as taken extra change when im given it at a store any more

The Fresh Prince posted:

The Fresh Prince posted:

The Fresh Prince posted:

From: admin@pegasus.k12.edu
Subject: August Announcements

Hello! I'm Bunion Skullswizzler, and if you're reading this then you're one of the parents/guardians that have checked off that either choose not to have a Facebook or would like to be part of our monthly email blast. Since we started school off late in the month of August, we'd like to actually use this first email to introduce those of us that put this email blast together. First we have a few announcements. Firstly, When you pick up and drop off your offspring, be sure to be careful phasing in between the world of the living and the world of the dead. We've had a few mishaps with sloppy dimension warping, and its a real mess for everyone involved. Secondly, we must remind you that IF YOU HAVE NOT SIGNED UP FOR HOT LUNCH, YOUR OFFSPRING SHOULD NOT EXPECT TO HAVE A HOT LUNCH READY FOR THEM. The reason we have the hot lunch signups is because it can be hard keeping track of dietary needs and restrictions, and so that we don't order too much food, and we can't do either of those things with students who aren't signed up getting lunches. So please make sure you either sign up, or send your student with a packed lunch. Lastly, Pegasus is an all inclusive school, so please, make sure to talk to your children about bullying so that they know what it is and what is wrong with it. We generally don't have issues, and we'd like Pegasus to remain that way.

INTRODUCTIONS:
First off we have me, Bunion Skullswizzler

I've been the principal here at Pegasus for the past 385 years, and have enjoyed every bit! Before I was a principal, I was a math teacher for the younger pupils, and I still occasionally will guest teach a math lesson or two. I hope that you won't have to see too much of me, but that we still remain in touch ad you feel welcome to come to me for anything you might need.
Next up, we have Selma Toadsmacker

I'm the Secretary in the front office at Pegasus for 50 years now, and people still think of me as the newbie around the office. I love working here, and look forward to coming in and seeing your offspring's faces every day. I'll probably meet you face to face at some point this year, and I can't wait to meet you then!
and finally, we have Tom Louseroaster

Hi Everyone! My name is Tom Louseroaster, and I'm Pegasus' Modern Media teacher. IN addition to helping with this email blast, I run Pegasus' Facebook, run the website, and the head advisor for both the school newspaper, and the school's TV Channel. I'm super excited for the upcoming school year, mostly because I get to work with your excellent kids! If you ever have any need to contact me, my email is on the website, and my twitter handle is @tomrealdemon

We hope that you have enjoyed reading about us, and we're glad to have you in this email blast. If you ever have any questions, feel free to email or call any of us any of us!

The Fresh Prince posted:

BREAKING NEWS: Forums User Lizard Wizard sucks

Malcolm posted:

Help break this down for me. The duck story says "[...]they've been watched by the facilities residents and employees ... and, on one day, by a curious duck." Would it be more proper to use the possessive "facility's" or not? I can't decide

Security Drone posted:

Funnypost Collabo posted:

GODDAMNIT, JOHN GLENN