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Why do old people take so goddam long to get out of the car after they park?
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May 20, 2020 17:05
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| # ? Apr 19, 2024 18:45 |
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Even the most minute movement is pure agony to them.
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May 20, 2020 17:26
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Edgar Allen Ho posted:Why do old people take so goddam long to get out of the car after they park? Death’s vision is based on movement.
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May 20, 2020 17:28
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FreudianSlippers posted:Even the most minute movement is pure agony to them. Only when they are moving to the left.
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May 20, 2020 17:50
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Edgar Allen Ho posted:Why do old people take so goddam long to get out of the car after they park? And another thing, why does it take women so long to get dressed am I right fellas?
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May 20, 2020 17:57
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Brawnfire posted:I've never seen anything so stupid in my life, besides the guy who drove with a dog in a pickup bed on the highway.
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May 20, 2020 23:31
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It doesn't seem like a dog would enjoy that in the slightest but there are some real stupid dogs out there so who knows maybe they don't care that they're in mortal danger.
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May 20, 2020 23:42
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PancakeTransmission posted:This is normal here though, a lot of tradies (tradesmen) have a ute with a dog in it, usually it's leashed to a post. Sometimes they might have an actual cage for the dog. As long as they're restrained in some way, it's legal. Yeah, unfortunately this dog was restrained by idiocy alone, and decided to try to jump down off the bed because it couldn't tell the visual difference between still pavement and 45mph pavement 
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May 20, 2020 23:55
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Sunswipe posted:I loving hate it. I can just about accept that SOME dogs are dim enough that they'd be all "i can haz snakkz nao?" but cats? gently caress off. Talk like that to any cat I've known and they'll give you a withering look that means they know what you're doing and they think very poorly of you as a result. Even with my dog, i imagine she goes like "father, i think it's time to go for a stroll" in her head. besides, dogs aren't goodly oafs like most people seem to think, they're sweet but also manipulative and sly, like children except more competent and with a better nose
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May 21, 2020 14:04
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i hate it when people cant navigate. i've seen my sister in law try to find a specific place in her own neighborhood, which has streets on a grid shape, she'd go west a few blocks, then south 1 block, and just walk back east for 2 blocks parallel to the road shed originally taken, like with no concept of cardinal directions at all. do all city people do this or something?
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May 21, 2020 14:07
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City people can’t drive. This is why there’s so much traffic and accidents. It is known.
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May 21, 2020 14:09
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Cardinal directions are meaningless to me unless I have a compass, but rotating the map so the direction I'm facing is up has always worked out fine.
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May 21, 2020 14:19
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CJacobs posted:It doesn't seem like a dog would enjoy that in the slightest but there are some real stupid dogs out there so who knows maybe they don't care that they're in mortal danger. They absolutely do, because they are bozos who literally don't understand the danger.
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May 21, 2020 14:37
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Dip Viscous posted:Cardinal directions are meaningless to me unless I have a compass, but rotating the map so the direction I'm facing is up has always worked out fine. I used to do this until some sexist rear end in a top hat told me 'girls do this because their brains have weaker spatial processing' so I forced myself to stop and learn how to do it 'properly'
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May 21, 2020 16:18
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My take on it is that if he kicked the dog for any other reason than feeling threatened he is a piece of poo poo. That being said, imagine you once got bitten really hard by a dog and you are always nervous around them because of this. You are trying to have a peaceful time outside and some dog jumps you and you panic the gently caress out. Then some guy yells at you because they don't understand that we come from the animal kingdom and have these things called instincts.
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May 21, 2020 23:07
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i hate the idea that in writing, you should constantly vary your expressions to "avoid repetition", which just leads to people using stupid words like "indicates" or "sheds a light on" instead of the perfectly clear "says" (or "argues" or "contends", if you absolutely must create variation). i'm proofreading my wife's thesis and while i'm very impressed by her use of english as a nongermanic nonnative, unfortunately somewhere along the line someone got this idea into her head and it's a lot of work to just weed this stuff out in favor of clear expressions. in general academic writing suffers from professionalization, a tendency imported from business and PR writing related peeve: i hate it when native english speakers assume that it's easy to learn english "because i managed to learn french/spanish" without any awareness of how languages are related or how distant some languages are from others or how comparatively easy it is for them to learn another germanic or romance language
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May 22, 2020 11:35
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I feel you, man. I edit scientific documents on the side for a service built to help non-native English speakers tune their English papers up for journal publication, and it’s always a huge jumble of weird syntax or twisting words to avoid saying the same thing twice in a row. It’s totally okay to say the same thing twice in a row, people! It gets weird if it’s five sentences in a row but sometime the simplest way to state a thought is the best way!
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May 22, 2020 12:16
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That seems like literary advice (Whether it’s good advice or not is an opinion I guess) being applied to scientific papers, which have a totally different set of standards.
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May 22, 2020 12:20
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Edgar Allen Ho posted:That seems like literary advice (Whether it’s good advice or not is an opinion I guess) being applied to scientific papers, which have a totally different set of standards. The whole don’t repeat yourself thing? Absolutely. Writing a scientific pub is way different and people don’t think it is, sometimes. Also data doesn’t “prove” anything! Stop using that word!
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May 22, 2020 12:25
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To that end: Dear aspiring amateur writers everywhere, "said" is the most invisible word in the english language. It is ok to use it more than one time in your entire story after someone says something. Sometimes you can use it multiple times in a row and nobody will even notice!
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May 22, 2020 12:32
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Edgar Allen Ho posted:That seems like literary advice (Whether it’s good advice or not is an opinion I guess) being applied to scientific papers, which have a totally different set of standards. even in literary writing i'd say it's not. good writing is always very precise, it's fine to use obscure or very specific synonyms if they are appropriate to what you're trying to say, or to use an odd grammatical construction if what you're trying to describe is itself odd, in literary writing this is very effective. but once you start consciously substituting one word for another just because you're concerned that your sentence is "not pretty enough" you're entering the realm of lowly forms of writing like business letters, TED talks or satanic websites like grammarly that will eventually make us all illiterate by teaching us linguistic parlor tricks instead of real writing and oratory the difference is that in literary writing, you can contort grammar or use weird words to achieve a desired effect, so it's done with the intent to convey, while the kind of thing i'm talking about is specifically done to obfuscate Shibawanko has a new favorite as of 12:37 on May 22, 2020 |
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May 22, 2020 12:32
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We're talking about language. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3MWpHQQ-wQg
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May 22, 2020 12:47
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Shibawanko posted:the difference is that in literary writing, you can contort grammar or use weird words to achieve a desired effect, so it's done with the intent to convey, while the kind of thing i'm talking about is specifically done to obfuscate When I worked on a weekly paper I had a colleague who had obviously had the 'never use the same word twice' thing drilled into him...and he applied too far and too literally. Which just resulted in paragraphs of tortuous, opaque and painful-to-read copy which I had to sub. He got really tetchy whenever it was brought up or when he saw that I had basically rewritten his work to be understandable. He didn't get that it's fine to use the word 'Ford' more than once in a news story about the car company It didn't have to be 'Ford' then 'The Blue Oval' then 'the Dearborn-based car maker' then 'the world's number-five car manufacturer' then then 'the 110-year old company', then 'Henry Ford's eponymous firm' and so on. And when the news story is about Ford testing a new braking system you could end up with nonsense near the end of the article like "The company known for the Model T and Mustang hopes to introduce its new retarding mechanisms next year." Verging on cryptic crossword clues! I suppose the real pet peeve is people stubbornly sticking to a method of work when repeatedly asked not too and so just make extra work for other people.
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May 22, 2020 14:16
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CJacobs posted:To that end: Dear aspiring amateur writers everywhere, "said" is the most invisible word in the english language. It is ok to use it more than one time in your entire story after someone says something. Sometimes you can use it multiple times in a row and nobody will even notice! This was a MASSIVE discovery for me. When I writing I was like "omg I've written said after every line" I'd start putting like "he chuckled" or "she moaned" or "they ejaculated" and other embarrassing constructs, he scoffed. Then I realized the eye seeks out the words in the quotation marks, then attribution, then fucks off to the next line.
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May 22, 2020 14:16
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BalloonFish posted:When I worked on a weekly paper I had a colleague who had obviously had the 'never use the same word twice' thing drilled into him...and he applied too far and too literally. Which just resulted in paragraphs of tortuous, opaque and painful-to-read copy which I had to sub. I'm sorry about your editorial work for HP Lovecraft
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May 22, 2020 14:51
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BalloonFish posted:'Henry Ford's eponymous firm' i lost it at this one, did the writer also drive an actual model T and smoke a pipe?
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May 22, 2020 15:04
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sephiRoth IRA posted:The whole don’t repeat yourself thing? Absolutely. Writing a scientific pub is way different and people don’t think it is, sometimes. Also data doesn’t “prove” anything! Stop using that word! sort of opposite to this, when a writer shies back from making a strong claim or statement where appropriate and hides behind "might be" or "possibly", this is maybe okay in data sciences where it serves as a reminder not to jump to conclusions from measurements, but it's a problem in humanities where the unwillingness to make a strong statement usually just means that the writer has little to say
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May 22, 2020 16:09
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I don't quite know where this fits in, but when I was studying speech therapy I once had marks docked because everything I said was backed by scientific evidence. Prof wanted 'more of my own opinion'. What the hell does opinion have to do with patient results?
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May 22, 2020 16:17
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Killingyouguy! posted:I don't quite know where this fits in, but when I was studying speech therapy I once had marks docked because everything I said was backed by scientific evidence. Prof wanted 'more of my own opinion'. What the hell does opinion have to do with patient results? You're supposed to draw your own conclusions from evidence instead of just stating the evidence? I don't know the circumstances of your situation but I can see it making sense?
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May 22, 2020 16:28
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I was recommended a Halo 2 play through the other day and had to close out of it because of the awful humor. At the very beginning of the game, the player and an NPC named Sergeant Johnson take an elevator together. The commentator decided this was the perfect time to unload these gems: "I hope he doesn't RAPE me. You gonna RAPE me, Sergeant? Hope he doesn't RAPE ME in this elevator." People still think this poo poo is funny?
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May 22, 2020 18:35
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I just noticed QCS was changed to “quiet calm sincere” when it seems like the word “serene” would be a better choice?!
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May 22, 2020 19:28
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Shibawanko posted:nongermanic It took me a few tries to read that as “non Germanic” instead of “nongermanic” which sounds like a british insult. Like a word for a bipolar pedophile or something.
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May 23, 2020 02:02
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Mainly a work thing: people who always flag their emails as "high importance". I'm capable of checking all my emails and deciding what's most urgent/important. You're not jumping the queue or getting to the top of the pile, especially as every other fucker is doing the same thing so it becomes completely meaningless.
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May 23, 2020 08:51
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franco posted:Mainly a work thing: people who always flag their emails as "high importance". I'm capable of checking all my emails and deciding what's most urgent/important. You're not jumping the queue or getting to the top of the pile, especially as every other fucker is doing the same thing so it becomes completely meaningless. This, and also putting a read-receipt on it. I have literally never allowed a read-receipt to go back to the sender, because gently caress them. On the subject of language and academia, when I used to have to read and engage in literary criticism for my degree, I used to hate the amount of florid language critics would use when discussing literature. It just served to highlight that a lot of them were more interested in showing off their own creative writing chops than actually deconstructing the work in any meaningful or edifying way. Really, though, I just hate myself because I was really good at spouting off this flatulent nonsense, and my lecturers loved it and gave me good marks
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May 23, 2020 09:34
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i enjoyed literary criticism as long as it stuck close to the actual work being discussed and let you see things in the work that you might not have noticed yourself
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May 23, 2020 12:43
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I was at a gas station/corner store earlier to pick up some smokes, and a woman who usually flirts with me was working. So we were talking and our conversation turned to global warming. (She asked me if I wanted a plastic bag for my single pack of cigarettes and it went from there you get it) I made a joke about how global warming isn't real, and she immediately turned ice-cold. I thanked her and left, and realized that I'm peeved at myself for having such a dry sense of humour that no one can really tell if I'm kidding around or not. So I did what any sensible person would do and rushed home to post about it on the Something Awful dot com forums.
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May 25, 2020 06:23
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The Mighty Moltres posted:I was at a gas station/corner store earlier to pick up some smokes, and a woman who usually flirts with me was working. Once when I was a teenager my mom was driving me back to her house and I joked that I could never apply for a job at Papa Johns because my dad would disown me (Older brother had a job there and bought home so many defect pizzas that everyone got very sick of it very quickly). She took me seriously, I really should not have had to clarify. My current major pet peeve is that I'm a small woman with the approximate grip strength and dexterity of a drunk chipmunk. gently caress jars, they shouldn't have to be such a process.
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May 26, 2020 02:08
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Agaragon posted:My current major pet peeve is that I'm a small woman with the approximate grip strength and dexterity of a drunk chipmunk. gently caress jars, they shouldn't have to be such a process. God same and when this happens to me I feel like such a stereotype
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May 26, 2020 03:05
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Agaragon posted:My current major pet peeve is that I'm a small woman with the approximate grip strength and dexterity of a drunk chipmunk. gently caress jars, they shouldn't have to be such a process. Stick a butter knife up the side to break the seal.
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May 26, 2020 06:58
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Just smash the jar open and eat the contents using a piece of the broken glass you idiot.
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May 26, 2020 07:34
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