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vains
May 26, 2004


Cole posted:

my beard makes my chin look so much nicer. like i could really take a punch.

not that i want to, just saying it looks like i could crack walnuts with it.

probably pretty good to jack off onto then

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Kung Fu Fist Fuck
Aug 9, 2009


Cole posted:

my beard makes my chin look so much nicer. like i could really take a punch.

not that i want to, just saying it looks like i could crack walnuts with it.

my beard makes it so any fist looking for my chin is about to embark on an exciting adventure into a dark and unexplored region

Cole
Nov 24, 2004

DUNSON'D

Kung Fu Fist gently caress posted:

my beard makes it so any fist looking for my chin is about to embark on an exciting adventure into a dark and unexplored region

comb your beard you nasty gently caress

Kung Fu Fist Fuck
Aug 9, 2009


Cole posted:

comb your beard you nasty gently caress

i have acquired a fro pick and i use it every day dont be jealous you scrub

Victor Vermis
Dec 21, 2004


WOKE UP IN THE DESERT AGAIN


Since waking up sometime yesterday afternoon, I've had 3x Rip Its, 3x Mt.Dew Kickstarters, and 1x Full Throttle.

My eyeballs are vibrating. This might be worse than trying to sleep with a headful of blow.

The Rat
Aug 29, 2004

You will find no one to help you here. Beth DuClare has been dissected and placed in cryonic storage.



On my first contract, one of the Ugandans on the opposing shift team literally had a heart attack and died at age 40 from Rip It overdose. They found him in his room, on his cot, dead, bowels voided, surrounded by Rip It cans.

WAR CRIME GIGOLO
Oct 3, 2012


The Rat posted:

On my first contract, one of the Ugandans on the opposing shift team literally had a heart attack and died at age 40 from Rip It overdose. They found him in his room, on his cot, dead, bowels voided, surrounded by Rip It cans.

haha

Bolow
Feb 27, 2007



The Rat posted:

On my first contract, one of the Ugandans on the opposing shift team literally had a heart attack and died at age 40 from Rip It overdose. They found him in his room, on his cot, dead, bowels voided, surrounded by Rip It cans.

This is me in literally 10 years

Naked Bear
Apr 15, 2007

Boners was recorded before a studio audience that was alive!


The Rat posted:

On my first contract, one of the Ugandans on the opposing shift team literally had a heart attack and died at age 40 from Rip It overdose. They found him in his room, on his cot, dead, bowels voided, surrounded by Rip It cans.
Welp.

Eugene V. Dubstep
Oct 4, 2013
Probation
Can't post for 10 years!


The Rat posted:

On my first contract, one of the Ugandans on the opposing shift team literally had a heart attack and died at age 40 from Rip It overdose. They found him in his room, on his cot, dead, bowels voided, surrounded by Rip It cans.

let this be me but also with my tighty-whities around my ankles and Busty Black Belchers Vol. 32 in the VCR

Kung Fu Fist Fuck
Aug 9, 2009


The Rat posted:

On my first contract, one of the Ugandans on the opposing shift team literally had a heart attack and died at age 40 from Rip It overdose. They found him in his room, on his cot, dead, bowels voided, surrounded by Rip It cans.

yea this guy was doin it right

Godholio
Aug 28, 2002

Does a bear split in the woods near Zheleznogorsk?


Nostalgia4Dicks posted:

idk how ya'll are getting fat after the fact you know you took every opportunity to dodge any kind of PT and were limdu your whole career anyways plus poo poo food and long hours and an overall lovely lifestyle contributing to obesity


You can have a beard or obesity not both :kiddo:

CHALLENGE ACCEPTED










Edit: I'm actually down about 40 lbs off my peak and still making progress. I have not shaved or trimmed my beard or gotten a haircut since October. I comb my beard daily.

Godholio fucked around with this message at 04:12 on Mar 3, 2015

Nostalgia4Dogges
Jun 18, 2004

Only emojis can express my pure, simple stupidity.



It is funny watching people balloon up on Facebook after they EAS. It's like the opposite of watching them marry a fat dependa after boot camp and having 2-3 kids

quantumfoam
Dec 25, 2003



Godholio posted:

CHALLENGE ACCEPTED










Edit: I'm actually down about 40 lbs off my peak and still making progress. I have not shaved or trimmed my beard or gotten a haircut since October. I comb my beard daily.

requesting you self namechange to Nostalgia4AFBlue
seriously though, good luck with the ANG & if it gets you out of Utah, gently caress yes.

OMFG PTSD LOL PBUH
Sep 9, 2001


On antipsychotics I got close to 300 pounds a year and a half ago.

I Was 178 this morning and peeping my stomach muscles in the mirror and my balls without a mirror unlike a year and a half ago.

Yay for medical marihuana.

Being fat suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucked. I'm putting a bullet in my head if I ever get morbidly obese again. :toxx: If I'm too lazy to do it, would one of you American Patriots be my angel and not let me go out like Hags and instead give me a high speed hollow point lead diet in the dome when I'm sleep apneaing one night? Then just burn my house down with me in it, the crane would just add to the embarrassment.

P.S. We need Cole to find my body and try to wake me up to really make this off meds mess of a sidebar into a true Gilbert Grape joke.

tyler
Jun 2, 2014



OMFG PTSD LOL PBUH posted:

On antipsychotics I got close to 300 pounds a year and a half ago.

I Was 178 this morning and peeping my stomach muscles in the mirror and my balls without a mirror unlike a year and a half ago.

Yay for medical marihuana.

Being fat suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucked. I'm putting a bullet in my head if I ever get morbidly obese again. :toxx: If I'm too lazy to do it, would one of you American Patriots be my angel and not let me go out like Hags and instead give me a high speed hollow point lead diet in the dome when I'm sleep apneaing one night? Then just burn my house down with me in it, the crane would just add to the embarrassment.

P.S. We need Cole to find my body and try to wake me up to really make this off meds mess of a sidebar into a true Gilbert Grape joke.

If you turn in to a disgusting fatboddy I will evacuate your brain matter for you bro.

OMFG PTSD LOL PBUH
Sep 9, 2001


Master Bateman posted:

If you turn in to a disgusting fatboddy I will evacuate your brain matter for you bro.

Thanks broheim.

WAR CRIME GIGOLO
Oct 3, 2012


OMFG PTSD LOL PBUH posted:

On antipsychotics I got close to 300 pounds a year and a half ago.

I Was 178 this morning and peeping my stomach muscles in the mirror and my balls without a mirror unlike a year and a half ago.

Yay for medical marihuana.

Being fat suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucked. I'm putting a bullet in my head if I ever get morbidly obese again. :toxx: If I'm too lazy to do it, would one of you American Patriots be my angel and not let me go out like Hags and instead give me a high speed hollow point lead diet in the dome when I'm sleep apneaing one night? Then just burn my house down with me in it, the crane would just add to the embarrassment.

P.S. We need Cole to find my body and try to wake me up to really make this off meds mess of a sidebar into a true Gilbert Grape joke.

antipsychs loving suck good on you brah

Burt
Sep 23, 2007

Poke.





The Rat posted:

On my first contract, one of the Ugandans on the opposing shift team literally had a heart attack and died at age 40 from Rip It overdose. They found him in his room, on his cot, dead, bowels voided, surrounded by Rip It cans.

One of the rigs I worked on was in Bangladesh and we had an old 40 foot container that had been turned into a Mosque for the locals to pray in.

One guy was giving it the "bend over touch you head to the carpet" bit when he suffered a stroke. He was knelt there for 8 hours with dozens of guys just walking round him thinking "Super serious musselman" before anyone noticed that, you know, he's been knelt there 8 hours. :downs:

Mr. Nice!
Oct 13, 2005

c-spam cannot afford



I'm at 150-155 right now which is lower than when I enlisted back in 06. I'm slowly withering away.

Nice and hot piss
Jan 31, 2004



Getting fat in Amurrica is actually easier than it sounds. Even with some exercise and an attempt at trying to lose weight can still lead to marginal increases in weight gain. We don't really "binge" on food every so often which leads to weight gain, but I think the last study showed we eat between 75-200 calories extra a day, which is half a can of coke to almost a 20 ounce bottle of coke.. So not really much at all, but over the time span of a year leads to 10 pound increases, add 2-3 years post military service and there's your 30-60 pounds.

Nostalgia4Dogges
Jun 18, 2004

Only emojis can express my pure, simple stupidity.



Doesn't Australia and the UK have more fats per capita or are we just all tied for 1st place

Nice and hot piss
Jan 31, 2004



Fortunately we still retain the title of fattest country in the world. That being said, just like the space race both Australia and the UK are clawing their way to fattest country in the world.

edit: I guess we can't even eat the best in the world anymore. Mexico has us beat.

Nice and hot piss fucked around with this message at 15:09 on Mar 3, 2015

Booblord Zagats
Oct 30, 2011




Pork Pro

Nostalgia4Dicks posted:

Doesn't Australia and the UK have more fats per capita or are we just all tied for 1st place



Mexico is the leader right now believe it or not.

Cole
Nov 24, 2004

DUNSON'D

Booblord Zagats posted:

Mexico is the leader right now believe it or not.

somethingsomething illegals somethingsomething

Vriess
Apr 30, 2013

Select the items of interest in the scene.

Returned with Honor.

gently caress you guys I am going to eat pizza buffet for lunch.
$4.99 which includes a soda.

CRUSTY MINGE
Mar 30, 2011

Peggy Hill
Foot Connoisseur


Don't eat Cici's pizza. /\

Mr. Nice! posted:

I'm at 150-155 right now which is lower than when I enlisted back in 06. I'm slowly withering away.

I'd ask about your workout routine but we all already know you got the gov issue belly bugs or whatever.

I'm a fat 210. Calves of steel though, even if one has wasted away a bit (gently caress nerve problems).

Cole
Nov 24, 2004

DUNSON'D

LITERALLY SHAKING posted:

I'm a fat 210. Calves of steel though
this basically just means you're an active fatty.

i respect active fatties.

CRUSTY MINGE
Mar 30, 2011

Peggy Hill
Foot Connoisseur


What can I say, I don't really care for lifting things.

Did plenty of that fixing brass assholes trucks.

Nice and hot piss
Jan 31, 2004



The best way to get big calves is to get morbidly obese, walk around and live life, then drop an obscene amount of weight.

bloops
Dec 30, 2010

Thanks Ape Pussy!


MurderBot posted:

The best way to get big calves is to get morbidly obese, walk around and live life, then drop an obscene amount of weight.

Goons know the one trick for sick calves.

CRUSTY MINGE
Mar 30, 2011

Peggy Hill
Foot Connoisseur


Or be raised on a farm.

Seriously had monster calves when I was a teenager. I was stacking the leg press machines at 15. The rest of me was fat though.

Kawasaki Nun
Jul 16, 2001

by Reene


215 right now. Moved between 190-210 in the navy. As a career fatbody I've always taken pride in burning people in races and the like. Gotta drop some LBS for spring though, about to have my first full kayaking season

Vasudus
May 30, 2003


In at 112, out at 174. I'm at like 160 right now. Moderately in shape, getting better though.

It was cool to hulk out of my clothes I wore in high school when I came back from OSUT.

bloops
Dec 30, 2010

Thanks Ape Pussy!


Vasudus posted:

In at 112, out at 174. I'm at like 160 right now. Moderately in shape, getting better though.

It was cool to hulk out of my clothes I wore in high school when I came back from OSUT.

112?! At what height?

Vasudus
May 30, 2003


holocaust bloopers posted:

112?! At what height?

4'

five nine

Grem
Mar 29, 2004

It's how her species communicates



Sitting in my insomnia clinic and everyone else is talking about how we should nuke Iran, China, all of the middle east... Please don't engage me you loving loonies.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008



Buglord

Cole posted:

somethingsomething illegals somethingsomething

It's like selective permeability.

CRUSTY MINGE
Mar 30, 2011

Peggy Hill
Foot Connoisseur


Grem posted:

Sitting in my insomnia clinic and everyone else is talking about how we should nuke Iran, China, all of the middle east... Please don't engage me you loving loonies.

That's going to be you in 10 years.




I'm playing gently caress-gently caress waiting games at the VA. Couldn't find a goddamn parking spot so I moved poo poo around and parked on a sand mound after rolling around the lot for 45 loving minutes. Haven't been able to get a PCP appointment because "the operator was sending you to a phantom line" which is loving bullshit since I've been calling for two months and still managed to get my psych appointment rescheduled (because they cancelled it without calling me).

I had to drag into the patient advocates office and raise a bitchfit to get poo poo scheduled for a simple check-up and maybe some vaccines before I wander off for six months (also some mis-shapened moles). So a last minute appointment is scheduled.

So now I'm two hours early to my shrink appointment, because I got here early to find parking and bitch to PA.

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Kung Fu Fist Fuck
Aug 9, 2009


Vasudus posted:

4'

five nine

jesus gently caress did you have to get a weight waiver? thats some concentration camp victim poo poo

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