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THE PENETRATOR
Jul 27, 2014

by Lowtax


Hello, TVIV posters! While you were off in your dens watching shows on your televisions, sitting on a loveseat with your significant other or hanging out on a couch with friends or small children (hopefully your own), an exciting new innovation hit the cyber-streets. “What is it!” I hear you cry from behind your cellphone screens or laptop monitors, glued to the ‘telly’ as you are. Why, I’m here to tell you.



It’s called ‘YouTube,’ a product owned by Google Corporation, and maybe you’ve heard of it; some famous ‘YouTubers’ – this means, a person who posts videos to YouTube and interacts with the YouTube community – have their own shows. An example of such a show is ‘Jack Vale Offline,’ a family-friendly prank series where Jack Vale pulls harmless tricks on unsuspecting strangers. Oh, you’ve seen this show? Well now you know his origin!



“But THE PENETRATOR,” you begin to ask, “how is it that a website where users can upload their own content possibly be an alternative to the well-produced series and sitcoms on ABC that I know and love?” Well hold your horses right there, partner, because you seem to be forgetting how television got its start.

If we go back all the way to December 22, 1944 and tune to NBC, we see the very first television program to run on that network – The World in Your Home. It was black-and-white and only ran for 15 minutes an episode, and was by all accounts crude and nothing like current programs, but it was television. It was what people watched. It was popular enough to run for four whole years, which even by today’s standards is a lot. Well, similar video series are being uploaded to YouTube, every day!

“You crazy motherfucker, give us some examples of content on this You Tube thing!” Alright, friends, hold your horses! I was getting to that! See, there are plenty of categories to choose what to watch, and below are a couple graphics to represent them.



Can you guess what they are? Go ahead. Movies, Music, and Education. Seems a lot like what your television provides, doesn’t it? And the best part is, as I may have mentioned earlier, thousands upon thousands of new and original content gets uploaded every day! You can never run out of shows to watch!

I bet I can guess what you’re screaming, right now. “Jesus Christ, you beautiful animal! Tell me more!” Well, I could do it, but that would be a lot to post and I just don’t have that kind of time – I’m too busy watching YouTube! But what I can do for you is provide you with a feature list and a current lineup of shows that you might enjoy seeing.

The Many Features of the Mystical Medium: YouTube
  • Videos buffer and play in real-time.
  • Unlike with a cable box, if you pause a YouTube video to continue watching later it won’t continue to play after 30 minutes – there’s no DVR!
  • After every video, you’re given a list of suggested watches based on your likes and history.
  • Don’t have an internet connection at home? No problem! YouTube works on every computer device, even your phone!
  • Web 1.5? What the heck is that! No Flash if you don’t want to use it – YouTube now supports HTML5 video!
  • When you register an account, you can share your thoughts on the video you just watched and read the thoughts of others. You can even have a conversation!
  • You can upload content of your own easily and in no time at all!
  • Ads? Unlike Hulu and Netflix, they don’t exist if you’ve installed an ad-block plugin! But remember: content creators need to make a living, and the only way they can monetize the videos themselves is with ads.
  • User-Creator interaction!
  • And More!


Current Content Club

Dragon Ball Z: Abridged by TeamFourStar
Ever wanted to watch Dragon Ball Z, but found the number and length of episodes unappealing? Well worry no longer! Every video TFS puts out under their DBZ Abridged series is under 15 minutes long (excluding specials) and condenses episodes to their very essence. Action and laughs aplenty, you’ll love this series!

VLOGS by Tyler Oakley
He’s hip, he’s young, he’s gay, and he makes video blogs. What more could you want? Follow Tyler Oakley’s life as he updates you on his week, every week, in 10 minutes or less. Did he have an exciting hiking adventure? Did he finally marry his boyfriend? Find out next episode! Also includes viewer mail!

Britain’s Got Talent by Britain’s Got Talent and whoever produces it
Don’t live in Britain? Do live in Britain, but want to catch up on tryouts or the trials and tribulations of your favorite contestants? Never fear, because this channel offers clips and episodes from the show as well as behind-the-scenes footage. Television has never been this easy!

Interesting Stuff by TAOFLEDERMAUS
Ever wanted to know what gun nuts get up to in their spare time, but don’t want to brave TFR because you’re terrified of social contact with goons outside of your subforum inner circle? Well just watch this guy and his friends shoot guns and destroy a variety of objects. Experiments with candy slugs (the shotgun kind), dry ice, and liquid nitrogen will blow you away – LITERALLY.

The Slingshot Channel by Joerg Sprave
Similar to TAOFLEDERMAUS, but with rubber! Joerg Sprave is a German slingshot enthusiast and master of his craft. Find in-progress videos of things that he’s working on or skip right to the end in this exciting series. You can even join in on his forum, and maybe win a slingshot in a contest that you can show to your friends and brag about!

A Bunch of Video Game Bullshit by me, acanthocybium
Are you interested in game and Let’s Play videos, but haven’t found anyone cool enough to watch? Well look no further because I’m here, I’m queer, and you’d better get used to it because you’re going to see a lot of me. I post videos sporadically whenever something cool happens in game, or a lightbulb turns on in my head, but I’m going to be expanding my brand and getting my name out there with some long-running LP series and possibly weekly uploads. Make sure to watch my Counter-Strike videos!

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Fuck the Police
Jan 20, 2012


How do I use this You-Tube?

THE PENETRATOR
Jul 27, 2014

by Lowtax


It's simple - just go to http://www.youtube.com/ and sign up for an account, then search for videos using the top bar or the suggestions under the "Browse Channels" button and #PopularOnYouTube. Ten minutes and you'll be Tubing for the rest of your life.

Fuck the Police
Jan 20, 2012


What if I don't want to Tube?

THE PENETRATOR
Jul 27, 2014

by Lowtax


Go back to your cable box, grandpa.

scary ghost dog
Aug 5, 2007


i guess u couldnt just make a thread for ur gaming channel lol

WeedlordGoku69
Feb 11, 2015

by Cyrano4747


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CARL MARK FORCE IV
Sep 2, 2007

I took a walk. And threw up in an English garden.

Yeah that was the most pointlessly complex attempt at self-promotion I've seen in a while.

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