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Hyperlynx
Sep 13, 2015



Snowglobe of Doom posted:

Well what else do you hold in your hand that is veiny and shaped liked a slot machine handle with a knob at the end????

But.. that's not...

...ok, sure. It's your wanking song. Who am I to take that away from you?

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Failed Imagineer
Sep 22, 2018


This conversation made me imagine a porn studio called FakeCasino where guys with weird dicks that look like one-arm-bandit levers stick them through a gloryhole and get cranked off by unsuspecting* gamblers

(* The gamblers in question would of course be professional sexhavers playing a role, as clarified upfront in the legal disclaimer).

Other possible studio name: MechanicalJerk

flakeloaf
Feb 26, 2003

Still better than android clock



"Slut machine" was right there

Shai-Hulud
Jul 10, 2008

But it feels so right!


Lipstick Apathy

Snowglobe of Doom posted:

Well what else do you hold in your hand that is veiny and shaped liked a slot machine handle with a knob at the end????

A wizards staff?

Snowglobe of Doom
Mar 30, 2012

Because if I tell you, you'll tell your friends, your friends are callin' me on the horn all the time, I gotta show up at shopping centers for openings and sign autographs and shit like that and it makes my life a *hell*. Okay? A living hell.


Shai-Hulud posted:

A wizards staff?

Oh poo poo that'd be a much better music video than the Rod Stewart poo poo about a WW2 soldier

Failed Imagineer
Sep 22, 2018


flakeloaf posted:

"Slut machine" was right there

I stand by my remarks

Dip Viscous
Sep 17, 2019



Snowglobe of Doom posted:

I went to school in the 70s and 80s and the giant world maps in the classrooms grew increasingly outdated and incorrect every year as countries kept changing their names but the school refused to spend money replacing them

I went to school in the early 90s. The singular world map predated World War II and our social studies books went into great detail explaining what a taco is and called them "a type of small pie".

This same school that couldn't buy books spent ~$300k anually on football equipment despite not having a football team and got caught about 10 years later buying PCs and throwing them away to blow their budget.

Phosphine
May 30, 2011




Snowglobe of Doom posted:

I went to school in the 70s and 80s and the giant world maps in the classrooms grew increasingly outdated and incorrect every year as countries kept changing their names but the school refused to spend money replacing them

When I was growing up I had this theory that you could pretty accurately gauge the social status/richness of an area by looking at how long the world maps at school has the Soviet Union on them. I had this idea in about 2004, as both my current and previous school at the time did. I brought this up last year or something and my wife thought it was absurd that any school would have an incorrect map for so long, having grown up in a rich fancy suburb rather than a dying industrial town.

Last week she realized the maps at the school she works now still has the Soviet Union on them, and had to concede that maybe my school in 2004 did as well.

zedprime
Jun 9, 2007

yospos


There's a whole undercurrent of millennials buying globes and maps with the Soviet Union on them for nostalgia sake (I reply millenially sitting next to 2 of the same edition of globes I grew up with). Going to school with a dissolved USSR yet the maps showed it was a small cultural phenomenon.

Weembles
Apr 19, 2004



Phosphine posted:

When I was growing up I had this theory that you could pretty accurately gauge the social status/richness of an area by looking at how long the world maps at school has the Soviet Union on them. I had this idea in about 2004, as both my current and previous school at the time did. I brought this up last year or something and my wife thought it was absurd that any school would have an incorrect map for so long, having grown up in a rich fancy suburb rather than a dying industrial town.

Last week she realized the maps at the school she works now still has the Soviet Union on them, and had to concede that maybe my school in 2004 did as well.

In the early 90s my middle school geography class was playing a game that involved naming countries that started with different letters of the alphabet. When we got to 'D' I called Djibouti - which nobody in my class, including the teacher, belived was real. To prove it, the teacher got out a globe and showed me the country I though was named Djibouti was actually French Somalialand.

Which it was. Fron 1883 to 1967.

fartknocker
Oct 28, 2012

Damn it, this always happens. I think I'm gonna score, and then I never score. It's not fair.




Wedge Regret

Phosphine posted:

When I was growing up I had this theory that you could pretty accurately gauge the social status/richness of an area by looking at how long the world maps at school has the Soviet Union on them. I had this idea in about 2004, as both my current and previous school at the time did. I brought this up last year or something and my wife thought it was absurd that any school would have an incorrect map for so long, having grown up in a rich fancy suburb rather than a dying industrial town.

Last week she realized the maps at the school she works now still has the Soviet Union on them, and had to concede that maybe my school in 2004 did as well.

Hell, it could even vary within the same school. The high school I went to from 2004-2008 was originally built in like 1964, but added new buildings over time. The classrooms in the oldest building still had chalk boards, old school overhead slide projectors, and maps with USSR and whatnot. The newest building, which at that point was maybe just a year or two old when I started, had updated maps, white boards, projectors that could link to the computers, and in a few rooms, smart boards as well.

Rascar Capac
Aug 31, 2016

Surprisingly nice, for an evil Inca mummy.

We should probably offer a prize to the first goon who finds a school map or globe with Eswatini on it.

SneezeOfTheDecade
Feb 6, 2011

2:35 PM, 5 April 2017. 153 decibels. Caused the cat actual harm.





Rascar Capac posted:

We should probably offer a prize to the first goon who finds a school map or globe with Eswatini on it.

They'll likely be in the most up-to-date districts - the name changed back from "Kingdom of Swaziland" to "Kingdom of Eswatini"
three years ago.

Rascar Capac
Aug 31, 2016

Surprisingly nice, for an evil Inca mummy.

SneezeOfTheDecade posted:

They'll likely be in the most up-to-date districts - the name changed back from "Kingdom of Swaziland" to "Kingdom of Eswatini"
three years ago.

Yes, that's what I was saying.

Milo and POTUS
Sep 3, 2017

I will not shut up about the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. I talk about them all the time and work them into every conversation I have. I built a shrine in my room for the yellow one who died because sadly no one noticed because she died around 9/11. Wanna see it?


Rascar Capac posted:

We should probably offer a prize to the first goon who finds a school map or globe with Eswatini on it.

Why? They've probably got money to spare

christmas boots
Oct 15, 2012

To these sing-alongs of siren songs
To oohs to ahhs to big applause
With all of my anger I scream and shout
America, I love you but you're freaking me out


Biscuit Hider

Milo and POTUS posted:

Why? They've probably got money to spare

lol the prize is a Ban + 30

SneezeOfTheDecade
Feb 6, 2011

2:35 PM, 5 April 2017. 153 decibels. Caused the cat actual harm.





Rascar Capac posted:

Yes, that's what I was saying.

Ah, I thought you were implying that any maps with Eswatini would date back to the turn of the 20th century.

AKA Pseudonym
May 16, 2004

A dashing and sophisticated young man

Doctor Rope

I don't even associate with people who have maps that don't list Nur-Sultan as the capital of Kazakhstan

RoboRodent
Sep 19, 2012



When the USSR dissolved, my dad tried to correct my globe by colouring in the various now-independent nations.

I appreciate the idea now, but at the time I was upset that he'd defaced my globe. He probably should have discussed it with me before and not after.

Nameless Pete
May 8, 2007

Get a load of those...

I got into a big argument with the substitute in sixth grade when the workbook told us to count the number of landlocked countries in Europe. It had only been like five years at that point, but Czechoslovakia was still two countries goddamnit.

Hyperlynx
Sep 13, 2015



Didn't we just have this exact discussion - that these days we can look things up on the internet instead of relying on books - and the consensus was that no, looking things up in books was just fine?

learnincurve
May 15, 2014

What is this boring crap we're watching? Check if Antiques Roadshow is on




Snowglobe of Doom posted:

Another beloved favourite



Blast. I have been spied.

Only registered members can see post attachments!

MariusLecter
Sep 5, 2009

NI MUERTE NI MIEDO


Hyperlynx posted:

Didn't we just have this exact discussion - that these days we can look things up on the internet instead of relying on books - and the consensus was that no, looking things up in books was just fine?

In theory, yes.

In practice, lol.

learnincurve
May 15, 2014

What is this boring crap we're watching? Check if Antiques Roadshow is on




“Why does google always give me American measurements” I ask with a shelf full of cookery books.

Snowglobe of Doom
Mar 30, 2012

Because if I tell you, you'll tell your friends, your friends are callin' me on the horn all the time, I gotta show up at shopping centers for openings and sign autographs and shit like that and it makes my life a *hell*. Okay? A living hell.


learnincurve posted:

“Why does google always give me American measurements” I ask with a shelf full of cookery books.

It's about time that we adopted a true standardized global unit of measurement

knife_of_justice
Aug 11, 2007

103 and still BITCHIN'

RoboRodent posted:

When the USSR dissolved, my dad tried to correct my globe by colouring in the various now-independent nations.

I appreciate the idea now, but at the time I was upset that he'd defaced my globe. He probably should have discussed it with me before and not after.

There’s a huge globe sculpture/installation outside the London School of Economics and every so often they have to hire the original artist to literally ‘colour in the democracy’ in the way you’ve described.

To make matters worse, the globe is installed upside down, because art.

Failed Imagineer
Sep 22, 2018


knife_of_justice posted:

To make matters worse, the globe is installed upside down, because art.

Sounds pretty NATO-member-centric of you

MariusLecter
Sep 5, 2009

NI MUERTE NI MIEDO


Failed Imagineer posted:

Sounds pretty NATO-member-centric of you

Warsaw pact countries don't have a flipped globe.

Unless Egypt was part of the warsaw pact, with their whole Nile-centric view.

Failed Imagineer
Sep 22, 2018


MariusLecter posted:

Warsaw pact countries don't have a flipped globe.

Unless Egypt was part of the warsaw pact, with their whole Nile-centric view.

I just don't like saying First World because the whole concept is dumb, whatever

Hyperlynx
Sep 13, 2015



Failed Imagineer posted:

I just don't like saying First World because the whole concept is dumb, whatever

Northern-hemisphere-centric, then.

Failed Imagineer
Sep 22, 2018


Hyperlynx posted:

Northern-hemisphere-centric, then.

Sure whatever, although I guess the point (inasmuch as there is one) is that this is a visual which plays to the biases of Western "developed" countries. But now the Sorkin-level joke which was never funny is thoroughly kill

Snowglobe of Doom
Mar 30, 2012

Because if I tell you, you'll tell your friends, your friends are callin' me on the horn all the time, I gotta show up at shopping centers for openings and sign autographs and shit like that and it makes my life a *hell*. Okay? A living hell.


The globes they sell here in Australia look like this:

Failed Imagineer
Sep 22, 2018


Snowglobe of Doom posted:

The globes they sell here in Australia look like this:



Does it properly display the land of Rand McNally tho

Regarde Aduck
Oct 18, 2012

haha


Grimey Drawer

Failed Imagineer posted:

Sure whatever, although I guess the point (inasmuch as there is one) is that this is a visual which plays to the biases of Western "developed" countries. But now the Sorkin-level joke which was never funny is thoroughly kill

you have advanced cspam brain

zedprime
Jun 9, 2007

yospos


Snowglobe of Doom posted:

The globes they sell here in Australia look like this:


Well you'd have to make them like that or they're going to look upside down while you're in Australia.

Failed Imagineer
Sep 22, 2018


Regarde Aduck posted:

you have advanced cspam brain

Probably true, maybe I should start posting there

zedprime
Jun 9, 2007

yospos


Hyperlynx posted:

Didn't we just have this exact discussion - that these days we can look things up on the internet instead of relying on books - and the consensus was that no, looking things up in books was just fine?
If you think people have goldfish level memories of geopolitical borders that only refresh when looking at maps, you are right. But I have bad news about the corporate policies of live map providers concerning disputed borders that make live maps less of a home run in the digital info era.

Aphrodite
Jun 27, 2006



Do Australians just think of north as down?

christmas boots
Oct 15, 2012

To these sing-alongs of siren songs
To oohs to ahhs to big applause
With all of my anger I scream and shout
America, I love you but you're freaking me out


Biscuit Hider

That’s why they refer to Australia as the land “up-over”

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Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

I canne has cîsebœuf?


(: spuǝᴉɹɟ uooƃ ǝɹǝɥdsᴉɯǝɥ uɹǝɥʇnos ʎɯ oʇ ollǝH

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