gently caress. marry. t-rex posted:

"Let's All Call 911"

Text: funny story of you crank calling the cops

pig slut lisa posted:

I've never prank called 911. sorry. but one time in high school i was babysitting these two kids (approx age 9 and age 6) and they were real squirrly shits plus i was probably unqualified to ride herd. anyway, one time they were like "we're gonna call 911 it will be funny" and i was like "no please don't" but they split up for different phones and i guess one of them actually dialed because when i was scolding them on the couch (the timeout spot) the phone rang and it was 911 dispatch. they asked if everything was alright and i said "yeah sorry i'm babysitting these kids and they were trying to prank call you."

the hosed up thing is that they didn't send a cop car out to check, they just took my word for it. so now i know what to say if i'm ever committing a crime and someone calls 911 i guess.

BIG BIC SQUAD posted:

I have never prank called the cops but I've had to call them once because my friend was attempting suicide

pig slut lisa posted:

i've called 911 on at least three different races

nonazis posted:

One time, i got really high and prank called random people from the phone book, saying that they had overdue porn. one dude took it really seriously, and got the cops to trace my number (*67 doesn't really work), and I got a harassment charge. I literally got my probation extended for six months because of a prank phone call.

pig slut lisa posted:

i want to hear more about this. also when you say overdue porn do you mean like the library or what.

Hick Magnet posted:

Hick Magnet posted:

My phone has a habit of accidentally going in to emergency dialer mode when it's in my pocket, and sometimes it actually calls 911. This usually ends with them disconnecting and calling me back and I explain that everything's fine.

Last summer I had no one to buy weed from and I was going through a really rough time and was desperate for weed. I had been mooching off of my friends for months because I didn't have much money, and ever since medicinal weed started chron is the only thing you can buy, and it's really expensive. One day I met a kid who smoked me out at a bus stop and then told me he could get me reggies, so I was pretty pumped to find a source of cheap weed that I could afford. We exchanged numbers and about a week later he hit me up telling me he desperately needed $40 and could get me an ounce for $40. Okay, what a screamin' deal, yeah sure I'll be there.

It was the middle of the day and it was like 110 degrees out. I walked to the bus stop, sweated my balls off waiting for the bus, and then called him when I got to the area he said he would meet me at. I waited at a circle k for about 20 minutes before he called me, and told me we would have to go to an apartment complex and he was on his way to pick me up. I waited around for another 15-20 minutes before he showed up... on a skateboard. He explained that we were heading to an apartment complex under a freeway overpass that I had never noticed before, despite walking by it often.

He started skating in that direction and I followed on foot. On the way there I found out that he was a 17 year old juggalo and started to get a little sketched out, but I wanted weed and I had already committed to much time to this trip so I pressed forward. He told me the names of the people that we were going to meet and told me it was extremely important that I knew their names and didn't address them by any other name. He said there was a big guy named Rebel who would be guarding the door and I had to be cool with him. When we showed up at the apartment complex he told me that we had to stop by his apartment first and wait until they gave him a call before heading over to pick up. We had to hop some fence to get in to his patio and then we smoked a bowl before heading inside. When we got inside there were three other teenage juggalos sitting around cross-legged on the floor studying with flash cards. The kid told me he would be right back and disappeared for about a long time while I awkwardly sat around with these other kids who didn't even acknowledge my presence.

He came back and told me that we were ready to go pick up and we hopped the fence out of his patio again and walked to this other apartment. He knocked on the door and sure enough, a shirtless skinny-ripped guy with a bunch of missing teeth and tattoos answered. He let us in, past a bunch of people sacked out in the living room, and lead us to a room where a big juggalo queen sat smoking from a tobacco pipe. There was another shirtless methed-out guy lying on her bed. The kid sat down on the floor and the juggalo queen directed me to do the same. She pulled out a legend of zelda piece and loaded a bowl and handed it to me. I took a big hit and passed it to the kid who was like "ahh naw man, it's yours." I tried passing it in the other direction to the juggalo queen and she told me to smoke all of it.

It was a really fat bowl so I kept smoking, it was reggies and I was used to chronic so I wasn't super high, but we basically sat around in silence for a few minutes while I smoked the entire thing and the lady kept prompting me to tell her how cool her legend of zelda piece was. When I was done she explained to me that I was going to have to hang out for an hour or two so that it didn't look like a drug deal. She was telling me that I looked familiar and seemed sketched out at first, but she took a liking to me as we sat there. At one point she made the kid come over and sit on her lap, and she mostly talked about how she got a green card and had weed delivered to her now. Some random guy came in to the house and walked in and started passing around a vape pen that they made me hit and I got high as gently caress. He also told me I looked familiar and was saying things like "Can't wait to see you around here again."

At some point a little girl came in to the room and was trying to tell Rebel and the juggalo queen that there was a phone call for them, and they started screaming at her, telling her she knew she wasn't allowed to leave her room when mommy had guests over and that they were going to punish her later. One of the guys picked her up and carried her back in to the room she came from and she was starting to cry and yelling about how she just wanted to tell them that they had a phone call. I was getting uncomfortable so I told the juggalo queen that I had to get to work and that I was sorry to just smoke and dip out but I appreciated her selling me some reggies. One of the meth guys turned to me and said "That's good, you got a job, we like earners." The juggalo queen told me she wanted me to come back later in the week and spend some time around them all and I was like "oh yeah, definitely, I'll be back for sure" and then got up and silently walked out the front door alone.

At this point I was about 3miles from home, carrying an ounce of weed which is intent to sell, and a little weirded out so I pulled out my phone to call my buddy and ask if he could swing by and pick me up. As I pulled my phone out of my pocket I got a call, from police emergency, who explained to me that they had just listened to several minutes of a concerning conversation and felt that I was now in a safe place to give me a call back. They started asking what it was all about and where I was at and I didn't really know what to do so I told them that because of mandatory reporting laws I wanted to report that a child might be in danger and gave them the address, in this hushed batman voice because I was literally right outside the door of the apartment and was afraid they would hear me. They thanked me and said they would send an officer and like 10 seconds later I hear a siren outside the complex. I still have an ounce of weed on me plus at this point it would become very obvious to the juggalo queen that I had just reported something so I took off running and hopped a fence in to an alley, which I ran down until I got to the agrarian science part of the local community college campus where they raise goats and poo poo, where I ended up rolling a joint which I smoked with some goat-tender kid while I waited for my friend to pick me up.

City of Glompton posted:

we just got a visit from two nice officers because my boss accidentally called 911 and hung up lol

Hick Magnet posted:

My phone has a habit of accidentally going in to emergency dialer mode when it's in my pocket, and sometimes it actually calls 911. This usually ends with them disconnecting and calling me back and I explain that everything's fine.

Last summer I had no one to buy weed from and I was going through a really rough time and was desperate for weed. I had been mooching off of my friends for months because I didn't have much money, and ever since medicinal weed started chron is the only thing you can buy, and it's really expensive. One day I met a kid who smoked me out at a bus stop and then told me he could get me reggies, so I was pretty pumped to find a source of cheap weed that I could afford. We exchanged numbers and about a week later he hit me up telling me he desperately needed $40 and could get me an ounce for $40. Okay, what a screamin' deal, yeah sure I'll be there.

It was the middle of the day and it was like 110 degrees out. I walked to the bus stop, sweated my balls off waiting for the bus, and then called him when I got to the area he said he would meet me at. I waited at a circle k for about 20 minutes before he called me, and told me we would have to go to an apartment complex and he was on his way to pick me up. I waited around for another 15-20 minutes before he showed up... on a skateboard. He explained that we were heading to an apartment complex under a freeway overpass that I had never noticed before, despite walking by it often.

He started skating in that direction and I followed on foot. On the way there I found out that he was a 17 year old juggalo and started to get a little sketched out, but I wanted weed and I had already committed to much time to this trip so I pressed forward. He told me the names of the people that we were going to meet and told me it was extremely important that I knew their names and didn't address them by any other name. He said there was a big guy named Rebel who would be guarding the door and I had to be cool with him. When we showed up at the apartment complex he told me that we had to stop by his apartment first and wait until they gave him a call before heading over to pick up. We had to hop some fence to get in to his patio and then we smoked a bowl before heading inside. When we got inside there were three other teenage juggalos sitting around cross-legged on the floor studying with flash cards. The kid told me he would be right back and disappeared for about a long time while I awkwardly sat around with these other kids who didn't even acknowledge my presence.

He came back and told me that we were ready to go pick up and we hopped the fence out of his patio again and walked to this other apartment. He knocked on the door and sure enough, a shirtless skinny-ripped guy with a bunch of missing teeth and tattoos answered. He let us in, past a bunch of people sacked out in the living room, and lead us to a room where a big juggalo queen sat smoking from a tobacco pipe. There was another shirtless methed-out guy lying on her bed. The kid sat down on the floor and the juggalo queen directed me to do the same. She pulled out a legend of zelda piece and loaded a bowl and handed it to me. I took a big hit and passed it to the kid who was like "ahh naw man, it's yours." I tried passing it in the other direction to the juggalo queen and she told me to smoke all of it.

It was a really fat bowl so I kept smoking, it was reggies and I was used to chronic so I wasn't super high, but we basically sat around in silence for a few minutes while I smoked the entire thing and the lady kept prompting me to tell her how cool her legend of zelda piece was. When I was done she explained to me that I was going to have to hang out for an hour or two so that it didn't look like a drug deal. She was telling me that I looked familiar and seemed sketched out at first, but she took a liking to me as we sat there. At one point she made the kid come over and sit on her lap, and she mostly talked about how she got a green card and had weed delivered to her now. Some random guy came in to the house and walked in and started passing around a vape pen that they made me hit and I got high as gently caress. He also told me I looked familiar and was saying things like "Can't wait to see you around here again."

At some point a little girl came in to the room and was trying to tell Rebel and the juggalo queen that there was a phone call for them, and they started screaming at her, telling her she knew she wasn't allowed to leave her room when mommy had guests over and that they were going to punish her later. One of the guys picked her up and carried her back in to the room she came from and she was starting to cry and yelling about how she just wanted to tell them that they had a phone call. I was getting uncomfortable so I told the juggalo queen that I had to get to work and that I was sorry to just smoke and dip out but I appreciated her selling me some reggies. One of the meth guys turned to me and said "That's good, you got a job, we like earners." The juggalo queen told me she wanted me to come back later in the week and spend some time around them all and I was like "oh yeah, definitely, I'll be back for sure" and then got up and silently walked out the front door alone.

At this point I was about 3miles from home, carrying an ounce of weed which is intent to sell, and a little weirded out so I pulled out my phone to call my buddy and ask if he could swing by and pick me up. As I pulled my phone out of my pocket I got a call, from police emergency, who explained to me that they had just listened to several minutes of a concerning conversation and felt that I was now in a safe place to give me a call back. They started asking what it was all about and where I was at and I didn't really know what to do so I told them that because of mandatory reporting laws I wanted to report that a child might be in danger and gave them the address, in this hushed batman voice because I was literally right outside the door of the apartment and was afraid they would hear me. They thanked me and said they would send an officer and like 10 seconds later I hear a siren outside the complex. I still have an ounce of weed on me plus at this point it would become very obvious to the juggalo queen that I had just reported something so I took off running and hopped a fence in to an alley, which I ran down until I got to the agrarian science part of the local community college campus where they raise goats and poo poo, where I ended up rolling a joint which I smoked with some goat-tender kid while I waited for my friend to pick me up.

diabeetz posted:

most recent time I've had to call 911 was because a friend was spiralling into a psychosis because of some bad drugs.

I tried to calm him down for nearly an hour, but in a house full of four other freakout cases, and one very drunk girl, I was overloaded and worried he was going to loving die.

so I called 911 and it sucked hard, but thankfully we were all white and I spoke to the emergency team and apologized for wasting resources on New Years Eve.

literally the worst night of my life, and we got off lucky.

pig slut lisa posted:

haha justkidding,that was a good thing you did and I'm glad everyone ended up ok

diabeetz posted:

most recent time I've had to call 911 was because a friend was spiralling into a psychosis because of some bad drugs.

I tried to calm him down for nearly an hour, but in a house full of four other freakout cases, and one very drunk girl, I was overloaded and worried he was going to loving die.

so I called 911 and it sucked hard, but thankfully we were all white and I spoke to the emergency team and apologized for wasting resources on New Years Eve.

literally the worst night of my life, and we got off lucky.

diabeetz posted:

yeah it's not like the fucker went back to doing mdma again four months later, without testing or anything. :/

Hick Magnet posted:

My phone has a habit of accidentally going in to emergency dialer mode when it's in my pocket, and sometimes it actually calls 911. This usually ends with them disconnecting and calling me back and I explain that everything's fine.

Last summer I had no one to buy weed from and I was going through a really rough time and was desperate for weed. I had been mooching off of my friends for months because I didn't have much money, and ever since medicinal weed started chron is the only thing you can buy, and it's really expensive. One day I met a kid who smoked me out at a bus stop and then told me he could get me reggies, so I was pretty pumped to find a source of cheap weed that I could afford. We exchanged numbers and about a week later he hit me up telling me he desperately needed $40 and could get me an ounce for $40. Okay, what a screamin' deal, yeah sure I'll be there.

It was the middle of the day and it was like 110 degrees out. I walked to the bus stop, sweated my balls off waiting for the bus, and then called him when I got to the area he said he would meet me at. I waited at a circle k for about 20 minutes before he called me, and told me we would have to go to an apartment complex and he was on his way to pick me up. I waited around for another 15-20 minutes before he showed up... on a skateboard. He explained that we were heading to an apartment complex under a freeway overpass that I had never noticed before, despite walking by it often.

He started skating in that direction and I followed on foot. On the way there I found out that he was a 17 year old juggalo and started to get a little sketched out, but I wanted weed and I had already committed to much time to this trip so I pressed forward. He told me the names of the people that we were going to meet and told me it was extremely important that I knew their names and didn't address them by any other name. He said there was a big guy named Rebel who would be guarding the door and I had to be cool with him. When we showed up at the apartment complex he told me that we had to stop by his apartment first and wait until they gave him a call before heading over to pick up. We had to hop some fence to get in to his patio and then we smoked a bowl before heading inside. When we got inside there were three other teenage juggalos sitting around cross-legged on the floor studying with flash cards. The kid told me he would be right back and disappeared for about a long time while I awkwardly sat around with these other kids who didn't even acknowledge my presence.

He came back and told me that we were ready to go pick up and we hopped the fence out of his patio again and walked to this other apartment. He knocked on the door and sure enough, a shirtless skinny-ripped guy with a bunch of missing teeth and tattoos answered. He let us in, past a bunch of people sacked out in the living room, and lead us to a room where a big juggalo queen sat smoking from a tobacco pipe. There was another shirtless methed-out guy lying on her bed. The kid sat down on the floor and the juggalo queen directed me to do the same. She pulled out a legend of zelda piece and loaded a bowl and handed it to me. I took a big hit and passed it to the kid who was like "ahh naw man, it's yours." I tried passing it in the other direction to the juggalo queen and she told me to smoke all of it.

It was a really fat bowl so I kept smoking, it was reggies and I was used to chronic so I wasn't super high, but we basically sat around in silence for a few minutes while I smoked the entire thing and the lady kept prompting me to tell her how cool her legend of zelda piece was. When I was done she explained to me that I was going to have to hang out for an hour or two so that it didn't look like a drug deal. She was telling me that I looked familiar and seemed sketched out at first, but she took a liking to me as we sat there. At one point she made the kid come over and sit on her lap, and she mostly talked about how she got a green card and had weed delivered to her now. Some random guy came in to the house and walked in and started passing around a vape pen that they made me hit and I got high as gently caress. He also told me I looked familiar and was saying things like "Can't wait to see you around here again."

At some point a little girl came in to the room and was trying to tell Rebel and the juggalo queen that there was a phone call for them, and they started screaming at her, telling her she knew she wasn't allowed to leave her room when mommy had guests over and that they were going to punish her later. One of the guys picked her up and carried her back in to the room she came from and she was starting to cry and yelling about how she just wanted to tell them that they had a phone call. I was getting uncomfortable so I told the juggalo queen that I had to get to work and that I was sorry to just smoke and dip out but I appreciated her selling me some reggies. One of the meth guys turned to me and said "That's good, you got a job, we like earners." The juggalo queen told me she wanted me to come back later in the week and spend some time around them all and I was like "oh yeah, definitely, I'll be back for sure" and then got up and silently walked out the front door alone.

At this point I was about 3miles from home, carrying an ounce of weed which is intent to sell, and a little weirded out so I pulled out my phone to call my buddy and ask if he could swing by and pick me up. As I pulled my phone out of my pocket I got a call, from police emergency, who explained to me that they had just listened to several minutes of a concerning conversation and felt that I was now in a safe place to give me a call back. They started asking what it was all about and where I was at and I didn't really know what to do so I told them that because of mandatory reporting laws I wanted to report that a child might be in danger and gave them the address, in this hushed batman voice because I was literally right outside the door of the apartment and was afraid they would hear me. They thanked me and said they would send an officer and like 10 seconds later I hear a siren outside the complex. I still have an ounce of weed on me plus at this point it would become very obvious to the juggalo queen that I had just reported something so I took off running and hopped a fence in to an alley, which I ran down until I got to the agrarian science part of the local community college campus where they raise goats and poo poo, where I ended up rolling a joint which I smoked with some goat-tender kid while I waited for my friend to pick me up.

bog pixie posted:

i got covered in gasoline which was gross

bog pixie posted:

i had to wrestle a guy so he wouldn't light himself on fire and my mom called the cops

Hick Magnet posted:

I took a big hit and passed it to the kid who was like "ahh naw man, it's yours." I tried passing it in the other direction to the juggalo queen and she told me to smoke all of it.

She was telling me that I looked familiar and seemed sketched out at first, but she took a liking to me as we sat there.

He also told me I looked familiar and was saying things like "Can't wait to see you around here again."

One of the meth guys turned to me and said "That's good, you got a job, we like earners."

The juggalo queen told me she wanted me to come back later in the week and spend some time around them all and I was like "oh yeah, definitely, I'll be back for sure" and then got up and silently walked out the front door alone.