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Seltzer
Oct 11, 2012

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What is Calcio Storico?

Basically this






More Precisely
Calcio fiorentino (also known as calcio storico "historic football") is an early form of football that originated in 16th century Italy. Once widely played, the sport is thought to have originated in the Piazza Santa Croce in Florence. Interest in Calcio waned in the early 17th century. However in 1930 it was reorganized as a game in Kingdom of Italy. Today, three matches are played each year in Piazza Santa Croce in Florence in the 3rd week of June. A team from each quartiere of the city is represented:

Santa Croce / Azzurri (Blues)


Santa Maria Novella / Rossi (Reds)


Santo Spirito / Bianchi (Whites)


San Giovanni / Verdi (Greens)

After playing each other in two opening games, the two winners go onto the final which occurs each year on June 24th.

Rules

The modern version of calcio allows tactics such as head-butting, punching, elbowing, and choking but sucker punches and kicks to the head are banned. The game is played on a field of sand with a narrow slit constituting the goal, running the width of each end. Each teams comprises 27 players who are allowed to use both feet and hands to pass and control the ball. Goals (or cacce) are scored by throwing the ball over into the netting at the end of the field. There is a main referee, six linesmen and a field master. Each match is played out for 50 minutes with the winner being the team with the most goals scored.

What essentially happens is the two teams line up and beat on each other. The team with the ball tries to preoccupy the other team by beating them down or taking them down to the point where a gap is created and the ball runner can go on a run towards goal. The goal is narrow and missing a shot on goal gives the opponents .5 points. Scoring a goal nets the shooting team 1 pt. Because of the penalty for missing, players try to get fairly close before shooting. When it comes to tackling a ball carrier anything goes including kicking his legs out from under him.

That's basically the rules but in actuality what happens is a big clusterfuck wherein a bunch of referees and assistants dressed like renaissance clowns run around calling things as they see fit.

(Respect this man's authority)

Players will break rules if they feel like they can get away with it and justice is arbitrarily dished out. However, players can and frequently do, get ejected for breaking the rules. This usually occurs after the most ferocious of hand gesturing. There seems to be a gentleman's agreement not to kick eachother's asses too bad, but I honestly have no real idea and people do get their rear end kicked.

The winners get a year of bragging rights and a white cow.

When to watch
Semi-final Verdi vs Rossi - 6/13/ 11:00am est
Semi-final Bianchi vs Azurri 6/14/ 11:00am est
Final TBA 6/24 11:00am est

Where to watch
The local Florentine channel that airs the games has a convenient HD web broadcast.
http://www.rtv38.com/livetest.html Be wary of when you click on this because they air ads for strip clubs at night

Why you should watch

Italian amateur striking


Italian amateur grappling


More importantly- It's legitimately crazy, bizarre and entertaining. Also I spent more than 10 minutes on this op

Check this poo poo out of you want
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=imI7dpzKIoE
A semi final from last year. Watch the whole thing, or watch from 15:00-16:00 minutes to get a distilled taste. Seriously watch at least that bit.


A short documentary focusing on the lead up to the game. Not the greatest, but interesting none the less.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XctCNiDICXo

Seltzer fucked around with this message at 23:36 on Jun 20, 2015

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Le Saboteur
Dec 5, 2007

I hear you wish to ball, adventurer..
Answer my question Seltzer! Can men just square off in these games and ignore the ball all together?

Detroit_Dogg
Feb 2, 2008
Aaron Rodgers is gay and lame and oh please cum in me Aaron PLEASE I NEED IT OH STAFFORD YOUR COCK IS NOT WORTHY ONLY THE GAYEST RODGERS PRICK CAN SATISFY MY DESPERATE THROAT

Seltzer posted:

Check this poo poo out of you want
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=imI7dpzKIoE
A semi final from last year. Watch the whole thing, or watch from 15:00-16:00 minutes to get a distilled taste. Seriously watch at least that bit.

At 16 minutes in a man in red has a guy in green completely immobile and a guy comes and gives him a bottle of water while he's still on top of the guy.



I want this sport to be The Next Big Thing

MagicCube
May 25, 2004

I was in Florence during the summer in 2013 and stumbled across this happening. I had no idea what it was at the time, but it was definitely the most bizarre thing I've seen live. The spectators get pretty amped up as well and I saw multiple fights in the crowd. It was crazy to me how big of a deal this actually was in Florence. It was really the polar opposite of what I expected to see in Florence, but I had a great time.

Le Saboteur posted:

Answer my question Seltzer! Can men just square off in these games and ignore the ball all together?

That is literally what 9/10ths of the game is. Most of the team fighting in the middle while the guy holding the ball stands near his goal doing jack-poo poo.

Seltzer
Oct 11, 2012

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Le Saboteur posted:

Answer my question Seltzer! Can men just square off in these games and ignore the ball all together?

Yes.

Seltzer
Oct 11, 2012

Ask me about Game Pass: the Best Deal in Gaming!
This will be on at 11am EST tomorrow and Sunday. So wake up, pour some grappa and watch the spectacle.

maffew buildings
Apr 29, 2009

too dumb to be probated; not too dumb to be autobanned
never have i been more proud of the country of my forefathers and their culture

DumbWhiteGuy
Jul 4, 2007

You need haters. Fellas if you got 20 haters, you need 40 of them motherfuckers. If there's any haters in here that don't have nobody to hate on, feel free to hate on me
We watched some replays of this in irc awhile ago and it was great. I'm glad it exists.

StarkRavingMad
Sep 27, 2001


Yams Fan
This sounds incredible and I'm going to try to remember to catch at least some of it. How long does each match usually run?

(edit) nevermind, I see the answer to my question in the OP. Might not be able to catch Saturday's if it is only an hour but hopefully Sunday's.

StarkRavingMad fucked around with this message at 03:57 on Jun 13, 2015

DannoMack
Aug 1, 2003

i love it when you call me big poppa
Are there any pro mixed martial artists who play?

MagicCube
May 25, 2004

DannoMack posted:

Are there any pro mixed martial artists who play?

Nope, it's just local Florentians from their respective neighbourhoods who spend one weekend a year beating the poo poo out of each other.

Sourpuss
Mar 18, 2007

Chomb Chomb Chomb
The best part about this is that the referees break up the fistfights by waving a massive feathered cap at the fighters. Macho

Seltzer
Oct 11, 2012

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it's 10:53 and the tv station is showing a hearing aid commercial on loop. I'm sweating.

Seltzer
Oct 11, 2012

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The pageantry is starting. GO GREENS

Bushmeister
Nov 27, 2007
Son Of Northern Frostbitten Wintermoon

So many shirtless dudes.

So many families leaning out of their living room windows to catch a peek, children and old alike.

I think I could get used to this.

Seltzer
Oct 11, 2012

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By pageantry I mean panning shots of Italians taking their shirts off in the stands and people walking around aimlessly. When will it start? 5 minutes 15? Who knows this is Italy.

DannoMack
Aug 1, 2003

i love it when you call me big poppa
Let's do this!

Bushmeister
Nov 27, 2007
Son Of Northern Frostbitten Wintermoon

:toot: :toot: :toot:

LET'S GET IT ON

Seltzer
Oct 11, 2012

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I wish I knew there was gonna be 40 mins of a dweeb interviewing renaissance clowns so I could've pushed back the start time but I hear horns. I think poo poo is about to happen.

DannoMack
Aug 1, 2003

i love it when you call me big poppa
I heard Leonardo & Michelangelo. I know those words from cartoons!

Lone Goat
Apr 16, 2003

When life gives you lemons, suplex those lemons.




I'm bugging my Italian friend to watch this and translate for me, here's what I've gotten out of him so far:


"I just watched for a bit. They haven't said when it starts, but they are currently talking about making the sport more "Florence-like" by making the rules more stringent: you need to have lived in Florence for 10 years, you need to have been a member of coloured neighbourhood competing for at least 1 year and you can't have a penal conviction of more than 6 months. Also, 2 "outsiders" are allowed per team"

Detroit_Dogg
Feb 2, 2008
Aaron Rodgers is gay and lame and oh please cum in me Aaron PLEASE I NEED IT OH STAFFORD YOUR COCK IS NOT WORTHY ONLY THE GAYEST RODGERS PRICK CAN SATISFY MY DESPERATE THROAT
I'm going to move to Italy so I can join a team

Seltzer
Oct 11, 2012

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I apologize for not realizing this would open with a loving hour long drum and flag routine. It seems the refs are entering now.

Seltzer
Oct 11, 2012

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Seltzer posted:

I apologize for not realizing this would open with a loving hour long drum and flag routine. It seems the refs are entering now.

Naturally the musketmen, crossbowmen, and all the teams would have to come out first before this could start.

BENGHAZI 2
Oct 13, 2007

by Cyrano4747
i've nevee been less excited to see a crossbow

canada jezus
Jul 18, 2011

Who are we rooting for?

Seltzer
Oct 11, 2012

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canada jezus posted:

Who are we rooting for?

The choice is yours. I've been a Greens fan for literally days, so they're my team.

Seltzer
Oct 11, 2012

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Literally The Worst posted:

i've nevee been less excited to see a crossbow

Consider this a cultural experience.

R. Mute
Jul 27, 2011

canada jezus posted:

Who are we rooting for?
the reds, cj. always the reds.

Seltzer
Oct 11, 2012

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Ok the trumpet has been played, the scroll has been read, and the flagmen are loving off.

Triticum Guzzler
Jun 16, 2002
i clicked on the 38 minute long video and no matter where i skipped to it was a shot of two rows of guys with their hands up but not actually fighting each other

Seltzer
Oct 11, 2012

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Greens out of the gate with a ko. I always believed.

Bushmeister
Nov 27, 2007
Son Of Northern Frostbitten Wintermoon

31 seconds and the first guy is out & stretchered. Red team go!

Detroit_Dogg
Feb 2, 2008
Aaron Rodgers is gay and lame and oh please cum in me Aaron PLEASE I NEED IT OH STAFFORD YOUR COCK IS NOT WORTHY ONLY THE GAYEST RODGERS PRICK CAN SATISFY MY DESPERATE THROAT

Triticum Guzzler posted:

i clicked on the 38 minute long video and no matter where i skipped to it was a shot of two rows of guys with their hands up but not actually fighting each other

Imagine like 20 Clay Guidas lined up

The ideology eater
Oct 20, 2010

IT'S GARBAGE DAY AT WENDY'S FUCK YEAH WE EATIN GOOD TONIGHT
Does anyone know what's going on with the gentle hugging?

Seltzer
Oct 11, 2012

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Poor ball handling by the reds. Ominous

Lone Goat
Apr 16, 2003

When life gives you lemons, suplex those lemons.




LorrdErnie posted:

Does anyone know what's going on with the gentle hugging?

You're not allowed fight 2 on 1, so if you're hugging, somebody nobody else can hit you.

Seltzer
Oct 11, 2012

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Terrible attempt on goal by the greens

Detroit_Dogg
Feb 2, 2008
Aaron Rodgers is gay and lame and oh please cum in me Aaron PLEASE I NEED IT OH STAFFORD YOUR COCK IS NOT WORTHY ONLY THE GAYEST RODGERS PRICK CAN SATISFY MY DESPERATE THROAT

Lone Goat posted:

You're not allowed fight 2 on 1, so if you're hugging, somebody nobody else can hit you.

That's dumb as heck, if you're just going to lay on him and not do anything you should be able to get kicked in the head by someone else

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DannoMack
Aug 1, 2003

i love it when you call me big poppa
Two guys laying on the ground looked super pissed that two other guys were boxing near them. I assume because they thought they might step on their fingers or kick sand in their faces. It's also got a lot more arguing with the refs than you'd expect

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