im losing blood (serious post)

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Mapparu

im going to die., i woke up with a bloody nose and blood all over my sheets. i went to the skin i coughed up blood.
this is the end.

# ? Jul 12, 2015 00:23

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# ? Apr 24, 2024 05:46

Mapparu

i was thinking about sleeping in the bathtub and making hte water all bloody and then inviting someone to come over and think i am dead but that would be problematic.
thoughts and comments about my day so far?

# ? Jul 12, 2015 00:23

alnilam

sounds like youre bleeding?

_{ty manifisto}

# ? Jul 12, 2015 00:24

alnilam

try to become less bleeding

_{ty manifisto}

# ? Jul 12, 2015 00:25

Mapparu

no its a bloody nose and ive gotten two so far and i got one when i was asleep... just wanted to share with byob

# ? Jul 12, 2015 00:25

Miss Psychosis

Sorry Mapparu.

# ? Jul 12, 2015 00:25

alnilam

i think i figured it out, did you get in fisticuffs with freeddy kruger last nite?

_{ty manifisto}

# ? Jul 12, 2015 00:26

Qwerinty: by zen death robot

blood's cool, that's a sign of victory, friend

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# ? Jul 12, 2015 00:26

Miss Psychosis

[In a giant pool of blood] Uhhh what the gently caress guys. Start the pink floyd already.

# ? Jul 12, 2015 00:27

Qwerinty: by zen death robot

it's a pink floyd laser show, which will cauterize the wound

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# ? Jul 12, 2015 00:29

POWERBALL: by zen death robot

[bleeding from every orifice] Knife to meet you.

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# ? Jul 12, 2015 00:31

alnilam

Qwerinty posted:

it's a pink floyd laser show, which will cauterize the wound

lol

_{ty manifisto}

# ? Jul 12, 2015 00:31

Barco Fiesta: a fantasy of olives

tilt your bead back and pinch your nose! :eng101:

# ? Jul 12, 2015 00:33

alnilam

don't tilt your head back but do pinch your ose

_{ty manifisto}

# ? Jul 12, 2015 00:34

weird: by zen death robot

when i get a nosebleed its a rush to shut all the blinds so no one sees and calls 911 or something dont worry its JUST a nosebleed

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# ? Jul 12, 2015 00:40

cat_herder: BE GAY
DO CRIME

tampons up the nose can be effective in soaking up blood

# ? Jul 12, 2015 00:40

fema crisis actor: bweee-ooo-eee-ooo-eee-ooo

Mapparu posted:

i was thinking about sleeping in the bathtub and making hte water all bloody and then inviting someone to come over and think i am dead but that would be problematic.
thoughts and comments about my day so far?

When you do this, make sure there is a small radio next to the tub playing that Alice song by Jefferson airship ala fear and lotheing

Serious part: what is the relative humidity where you are, how much water do you drink?

# ? Jul 12, 2015 00:44

Miss Psychosis

meteloides posted:

tampons up the nose can be effective in soaking up blood

And, coincidentally, also good for cosplaying a walrus.

# ? Jul 12, 2015 00:52

Qwerinty: by zen death robot

i accidentally sliced my finger open a few months ago to the meat and had to get stitches at the joint. lots and lots of blood. i asked the doctor if i could keep the blood as a souvenir, plus hey, free blood

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# ? Jul 12, 2015 00:58

fema crisis actor: bweee-ooo-eee-ooo-eee-ooo

Qwerinty posted:

i accidentally sliced my finger open a few months ago to the meat and had to get stitches at the joint. lots and lots of blood. i asked the doctor if i could keep the blood as a souvenir, plus hey, free blood

what did the dotcor say

ty bacalou!

# ? Jul 12, 2015 01:02

Qwerinty: by zen death robot

fema crisis actor posted:

what did the dotcor say

he said, some bullshit about biological hazards. it's my blood, it belongs to me. he also refused to stitch it into a smiley face. I bet he didn't even know how

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# ? Jul 12, 2015 01:08

pogi

One time I took an aspirin and a hot bath. I dozed off in the tub, and when I woke up the water was pink and my face was covered in blood. The end.

# ? Jul 12, 2015 01:08

joke_explainer

in movies if someone has a nosebleed they're like gonna die really soon. thankfully they're like, the most minor of injuries irl

# ? Jul 12, 2015 01:11

verily carefree

alnilam posted:

try to become less bleeding

have you tried this yet op?

# ? Jul 12, 2015 01:22

Damp Star Baby: Staying Legend. CA Exempt DEATH

joke_explainer posted:

in movies if someone has a nosebleed they're like gonna die really soon. thankfully they're like, the most minor of injuries irl

I just watched blow and this happens. I hope you don't have some sort of vague cancer mapparu!! :ohdear:

I must create a system or be enslaved by another mans; I will not reason and compare: my business is to create. - William Blake

# ? Jul 12, 2015 01:26

fuck. marry. t-rex

Watc h out for Noseferatu

# ? Jul 12, 2015 02:27

Miss Psychosis

pogi posted:

One time I took an aspirin and a hot bath. I dozed off in the tub, and when I woke up the water was pink and my face was covered in blood. The end.

Pogi was accidentally in Pink Floyd.

# ? Jul 12, 2015 02:27

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN: I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.

joke_explainer posted:

in movies if someone has a nosebleed they're like gonna die really soon. thankfully they're like, the most minor of injuries irl

Sometimes they cough into a handkerchief and when they look at it there is blood. Watch out for that also

# ? Jul 12, 2015 02:31

ron color

ive only ever had one

# ? Jul 12, 2015 02:37

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN: I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.

Have you tried coagulation, Op?

# ? Jul 12, 2015 02:37

Qwerinty: by zen death robot

i'm just glad mapparu was able to get some sleep, despite the terrible price

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# ? Jul 12, 2015 02:39

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN: I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.

Qwerinty posted:

i'm just glad mapparu was able to get some sleep, despite the terrible price

RIP mapparu, sleep tight

# ? Jul 12, 2015 02:45

GEExCEE

Mapparu posted:

im going to die., i woke up with a bloody nose and blood all over my sheets. i went to the skin i coughed up blood.
this is the end.

lucky...

# ? Jul 12, 2015 02:48

GEExCEE

all the cool byob posters are dying... why not me?

# ? Jul 12, 2015 02:49

mags: I am a congenital optimist.

turns out making yourself start dying is pretty easy

paul_soccer12 posted:

everyone in the idf must die

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# ? Jul 12, 2015 02:53

GEExCEE

it's easy, but not "cool." you have to make your death seem graceful and effortless, like you didn't even really want to die, anyway

# ? Jul 12, 2015 02:58

deep dish peat moss

I keep misplacing my blood

# ? Jul 12, 2015 03:03

deep dish peat moss

Grandma keeps losing blood... I guess you get really forgetful when you're a grandma

# ? Jul 12, 2015 03:04

mags: I am a congenital optimist.

GEExCEE posted:

it's easy, but not "cool." you have to make your death seem graceful and effortless, like you didn't even really want to die, anyway

secretly ingest carcinogens until you develop a rare cancer like cancer of the artery walls or something

paul_soccer12 posted:

everyone in the idf must die

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# ? Jul 12, 2015 03:10

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# ? Apr 24, 2024 05:46

mags: I am a congenital optimist.

loved one: "Angio sarcoma? How...what are the odds? Oh god..."

me: "Hmm, yes, what are the odds...hah hah..."

paul_soccer12 posted:

everyone in the idf must die

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# ? Jul 12, 2015 03:11

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