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 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wo_Ejfc5hW8 Carly Fiorina is a woman and also happens to be running for the Republican nomination for president. She is not Sarah Palin and is a super huge business person who will make America great again. Here is her official campaign site. She probably would make a better president than most of the top polling GOP candidates. Thoughts? DutchDupe has issued a correction as of 19:08 on Jul 18, 2015 |
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Jul 18, 2015 11:07
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now you're just making them up
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Jul 18, 2015 11:19
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give me her bones so that I may foresee the true GOP candidate
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Jul 18, 2015 11:29
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 I wonder how well this would go over if a male candidate issued a statement like this. Thank god Carly is here to play her roll.
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Jul 18, 2015 11:52
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Her name is a made up name that is supposed to be a play on California, right? e: Er, I mean made up in that she made it up, not her parents Matey has issued a correction as of 12:33 on Jul 18, 2015 |
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Jul 18, 2015 12:30
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Carly Fiorina is good, but Meg Hitman is the really funny one imo
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Jul 18, 2015 12:44
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“I also think the argument for Common Core is frequently, ‘Oh, we have to compete with the Chinese,’” Fiorina said in the interview with Iowa political blog Caffeinated Thoughts. “I’ve been doing business in China for decades, and I will tell you that yeah, the Chinese can take a test, but what they can’t do is innovate,” Fiorina said. “They’re not terribly imaginative. They’re not entrepreneurial, they don’t innovate, that’s why they’re stealing our intellectual property.”
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Jul 18, 2015 12:45
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Repubicans will never vote for a woman. Next.
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Jul 18, 2015 14:12
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Her presidential campaign is a failure until she produces something on the same level as demon sheep: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wo_Ejfc5hW8 I am not accepting lack of budget as an answer for the lack of ads because firstly this is the SuperPAC era and secondly Mike Gravel's 2008 ad probably cost $7 and thats a real contender for best political ad ever.
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Jul 18, 2015 18:11
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She should outsource the VP spot to some dude in India who communicates via Skype and is paid $3 a day. It's a good way to cut costs, she could do that with the various cabinet positions as well.
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Jul 18, 2015 19:43
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The only candidate who'll drive America into bankruptcy faster than Trump.
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Jul 18, 2015 20:08
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I didn't realize demon sheep was a real thing and I thought the otherwise excellent CNN Too Many Cooks thing just made that up to be rAnDoM. Did Keith David do the voiceover to that ad?
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Jul 18, 2015 20:08
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i agree OP! carly for prez https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TeccAtqd5K8 i don't care if she's canadian she makes good music
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Jul 18, 2015 20:23
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Reminder that while Fiorina was CEO, HP desktop printer drivers literally included a web server. I don't think this has any real bearing on her political skills, but still: what the gently caress.
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Jul 18, 2015 20:44
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Proposition Joe posted:Her presidential campaign is a failure until she produces something on the same level as demon sheep: was this made by the same people who did the king roy the rat ad https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lt35BYEOlEw
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Jul 19, 2015 01:22
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this is a thing https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tq5OQafDVxc
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Jul 19, 2015 01:30
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 Fiorina's campaign for senate in 2010 also produced this masterpiece called Hot Air: The Movie where Barbara Boxer mutates through the t-virus or something into a giant, Brave New World blimp that flies across America attacking people with nonsense. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lJKlc77K5dg
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Jul 19, 2015 01:37
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Proposition Joe posted:Her presidential campaign is a failure until she produces something on the same level as demon sheep: Are you talking about the ad where he stares into the camera for over a minute then throws a rock into a river and walks away?
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Jul 19, 2015 02:13
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Funny computer
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Jul 19, 2015 02:28
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DutchDupe posted:Are you talking about the ad where he stares into the camera for over a minute then throws a rock into a river and walks away? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0rZdAB4V_j8
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Jul 19, 2015 06:45
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Technogeek posted:Reminder that while Fiorina was CEO, HP desktop printer drivers literally included a web server. Wait what the. How... Wh...why in the gently caress would you even.... Huh Also, HP stock like doubled the day she was tossed on her rear end.
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Jul 19, 2015 09:29
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FilthyImp posted:Wait what the. How... Wh...why in the gently caress would you even.... Huh It was for the printer control panel. Hewlett-Packard posted:The following components are necessary for the current Toolbox to operate:
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Jul 19, 2015 22:11
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At Hewlett-Packard Fiorina was responsible for the ill-fated merger with Compaq, as well as firing nearly 30,000 employees and sending tens of thousands of jobs oversea. Never lacking in chutzpa, Fiorina celebrated the latter coup as “Right Shoring.” Things got so bad for H-P that in 2002, Arianna Packard, granddaughter of founder David Packard joined with Bill Hewlett, Walter Hewlett’s son, in a proxy fight to oust Fiorina. That moved failed, but in 2005, Fiorina was finally fired, and given a $20-million dollar settlement to just go away. In response H-P’ stock price bounced back by 10% in a single day. About Fiorina’s service at H-P Arianna Packard wrote, “I know a little bit about Carly Fiorina, having watched her almost destroy the company my grandfather founded.” yeah she seems like a good lady.
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Jul 19, 2015 22:34
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SpeedGem posted:At Hewlett-Packard Fiorina was responsible for the ill-fated merger with Compaq, as well as firing nearly 30,000 employees and sending tens of thousands of jobs oversea. Never lacking in chutzpa, Fiorina celebrated the latter coup as “Right Shoring.” Things got so bad for H-P that in 2002, Arianna Packard, granddaughter of founder David Packard joined with Bill Hewlett, Walter Hewlett’s son, in a proxy fight to oust Fiorina. That moved failed, but in 2005, Fiorina was finally fired, and given a $20-million dollar settlement to just go away. In response H-P’ stock price bounced back by 10% in a single day. About Fiorina’s service at H-P Arianna Packard wrote, “I know a little bit about Carly Fiorina, having watched her almost destroy the company my grandfather founded.” My uncle was one of the original Compaq employees and was laid off by Carly. It's kinda nice watching her fail at everything.
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Jul 20, 2015 00:18
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Do you think he regrets going the Dadaist route or is he immensely proud (should be the later). Also lol, .us
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Jul 20, 2015 00:41
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DutchDupe posted:Are you talking about the ad where he stares into the camera for over a minute then throws a rock into a river and walks away? Holy moly, again I just assumed this had to be hyperbole. Nope.
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Jul 20, 2015 01:11
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Ralp posted:Holy moly, again I just assumed this had to be hyperbole. Nope. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lRwizmuCnOw
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Jul 20, 2015 01:21
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drat, Mike Gravel was on one Good Ol Gravelpit, where'd ya go?
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Jul 20, 2015 01:24
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I expect the value of this thread has increased by at least 10% now that Carly Fiorina has been ousted and replaced with Mike Gravel.
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Jul 20, 2015 02:35
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The last HP printer I had sucked rear end. THANKS CARLY 
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Jul 21, 2015 04:20
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Lord of Pie posted:The last HP printer I had sucked rear end. THANKS CARLY Brother printer = only good printer
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Jul 22, 2015 05:39
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SEC Charges Hewlett-Packard With FCPA Violations Company to Pay $108 Million to Settle Civil and Criminal Cases FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE 2014-73 Washington D.C., April 9, 2014 — The Securities and Exchange Commission today charged Hewlett-Packard with violating the Foreign Corrupt Practices Act (FCPA) when its subsidiaries in three different countries made improper payments to government officials to obtain or retain lucrative public contracts. Hewlett-Packard has agreed to pay more than $108 million to settle the SEC’s charges and a parallel criminal case announced today by the U.S. Department of Justice. The SEC’s order instituting settled administrative proceedings finds that the Palo Alto, Calif.-based technology company’s subsidiary in Russia paid more than $2 million through agents and various shell companies to a Russian government official to retain a multi-million dollar contract with the federal prosecutor’s office. In Poland, Hewlett-Packard’s subsidiary provided gifts and cash bribes worth more than $600,000 to a Polish government official to obtain contracts with the national police agency. And as part of its bid to win a software sale to Mexico’s state-owned petroleum company, Hewlett-Packard’s subsidiary in Mexico paid more than $1 million in inflated commissions to a consultant with close ties to company officials, and money was funneled to one of those officials. “Hewlett-Packard lacked the internal controls to stop a pattern of illegal payments to win business in Mexico and Eastern Europe. The company’s books and records reflected the payments as legitimate commissions and expenses,” said Kara Brockmeyer, chief of the SEC Enforcement Division’s FCPA Unit. “Companies have a fundamental obligation to ensure that their internal controls are both reasonably designed and appropriately implemented across their entire business operations, and they should take a hard look at the agents conducting business on their behalf.” According to the SEC’s order, the scheme involving Hewlett-Packard’s Russian subsidiary occurred from approximately 2000 to 2007. The bribes were paid through agents and consultants in order to win a government contract for computer hardware and software. Employees within the subsidiary and elsewhere raised questions about the significant markup being paid to the agent on the deal and the subcontractors that the agent expected to use. Despite the red flags, the deal went forward without any meaningful due diligence on the agent or the subcontractors. The SEC’s order finds that bribes involving Hewlett-Packard’s subsidiary in Poland occurred from approximately 2006 to 2010. Acting primarily through its public sector sales manager, the subsidiary agreed to pay a Polish government official in order to win contracts for information technology products and services. The official received a percentage of net revenue earned from the contracts, and the bribes were delivered in cash from off-the-books accounts. According to the SEC’s order, Hewlett-Packard’s subsidiary in Mexico paid a consultant to help the company win a public IT contract worth approximately $6 million. At least $125,000 was funneled to a government official at the state-owned petroleum company with whom the consultant had connections. Although the consultant was not an approved deal partner and had not been subjected to the due diligence required under company policy, HP Mexico sales managers used a pass-through entity to pay inflated commissions to the consultant. This was internally referred to as the “influencer fee.” Hewlett-Packard consented to the SEC’s order, which finds that it violated the internal controls and books and records provisions of the Securities Exchange Act of 1934. The company agreed to pay $29 million in disgorgement (approximately $26.47 million to the SEC and $2.53 million to satisfy an IRS forfeiture as part of the criminal matter). Hewlett-Packard also agreed to pay prejudgment interest of $5 million to the SEC and fines totaling $74.2 million in the criminal case for a total of more than $108 million in disgorgement and penalties. The SEC’s investigation was conducted by David A. Berman and Tracy L. Davis of the FCPA Unit in San Francisco. The SEC appreciates the assistance of the U.S. Department of Justice’s Fraud Section and the U.S. Attorney’s Office for the Northern District of California as well as the Federal Bureau of Investigation, Internal Revenue Service, and Public Prosecutor’s Office in Dresden, Germany.
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Jul 22, 2015 10:09
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SpeedGem posted:At Hewlett-Packard Fiorina was responsible for the ill-fated merger with Compaq, as well as firing nearly 30,000 employees and sending tens of thousands of jobs oversea. Never lacking in chutzpa, Fiorina celebrated the latter coup as “Right Shoring.” Things got so bad for H-P that in 2002, Arianna Packard, granddaughter of founder David Packard joined with Bill Hewlett, Walter Hewlett’s son, in a proxy fight to oust Fiorina. That moved failed, but in 2005, Fiorina was finally fired, and given a $20-million dollar settlement to just go away. In response H-P’ stock price bounced back by 10% in a single day. About Fiorina’s service at H-P Arianna Packard wrote, “I know a little bit about Carly Fiorina, having watched her almost destroy the company my grandfather founded.” why did they give her 20 million?
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Jul 22, 2015 16:34
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Top City Homo posted:why did they give her 20 million? Most executives have a severance package in their contract if it's terminated early. HP was willing to eat that cost to get rid of her. e: Details: http://www.nytimes.com/2005/02/12/business/fiorina-exiting-hewlettpackard-with-more-than-42-million.html
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Jul 22, 2015 16:51
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AreWeDrunkYet posted:Most executives have a severance package in their contract if it's terminated early. HP was willing to eat that cost to get rid of her. talk about merit pay
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Jul 22, 2015 17:05
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Top City Homo posted:talk about merit pay It's the ultimate failing upward.
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Jul 22, 2015 17:54
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the free market basically assessed carly fiorina's value to HP at approximately negative three billion dollars
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Jul 23, 2015 17:30
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the financial unproductive markets only constitute 10% of GDP but hold 40% of the liquid capital in the GDP our economy is based on non productive paper shuffling and we are in the calm before the next bubble crash in fact all economic activity that doesn't account for private debt and unproductive revenue means that we will always crash the economy think of it like this people are playing a giant game of poker and borrow from the house to muscle out other players for position Players bet and crowd out smaller players and some just cash with the borrowed cash and leave with it despite never winning a round, eventually the house shits its pants and calls in its chips in the middle of the game everyone who is still playing loses and the chips are flushed they then go back to the house and start over and the ones who cashed out early come in with an early advantage now you know the game
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Jul 23, 2015 21:05
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Matey posted:drat, Mike Gravel was on one He went on to bigger and better things: quote:In December 2014, he was announced as the new CEO of KUSH, a company which makes marijuana-infused products for medicinal and recreational use, and a subsidiary of Cannabis Sativa, Inc.[196]
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Jul 23, 2015 21:29
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JfishPirate posted:
My nigga
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Jul 23, 2015 21:54
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