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Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





Oodles posted:

I don’t get those options on iOS.



Tap and hold so you get that menu, and then select img and upload.

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Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





Salisbury Snape posted:

So my wife dreamt that I was having an affair and is now really angry with me.
Are all women this crazy, or is it just mine?

There was a girl in my sixth form who was furious with me for a day because I had been mean to her in her dream. She realised around lunchtime this wasn't the most rational response...

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





Galewolf posted:

I'm having a hard time to believe the government going full on "haha money machine go brr" mode doesn't have enough money to also include takeaways for a limited amount of time, which would, you know, have the added benefit of less people not spreading deadly pandemic to eat half priced Nando's.

Because a big part of the strategy is to convince people that it’s safe to eat out again, to stop all of the restaurants (which employ more people than takeaways) from going under.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





Pistol_Pete posted:

I've been through this process 3 times and fully intend to die in my current place and be buried under the floorboards rather than ever go through it again.

Certainly creating a refurbishment issue for the new owners. I like it.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





oh no computer posted:

tour de france starts today

Got my team ready.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





oh no computer posted:

It was based of that american bloke, and the problem with that (other than, well, you know) is that he was very obese, like >30st, and when you're that big you can still lose a poo poo load of weight while eating a fair few calories because your maintenance is so much higher. The same doesn't apply to someone literally half that weight trying to lose a few pounds.

Yes, Jared Fogle - originally the spokesman for Subway. and now serving 15 years in federal prison for possessing child pornography and traveling to pay for sex with minors. Hence the 'nonce' comment earlier.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





NotJustANumber99 posted:

loving what! Wetherspoons app disables screenshots. How can this be allowed?

Obviously it’s bizarre they’d do that. But any app that blocks this all you have to do is swipe up / double tap to zoom into the multitasking view, screenshot that and crop. Works on things like snapchat too that report your screenshots.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





Actually thinking it through that might only working for the 'report' apps like snapchat, not the blocking ones like netflix and, erm, Wetherspoons.

loving hell, 'freedom breakfast'.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





This is how 13 Sins starts, don't do it.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





Camrath posted:

Orders are still open! Shoot me a pm or check out the fb page at fb.me/Fudjit for the ordering instructions.

Or I guess I could just put them in this thread too if people don’t mind?

:justpost: IMO. It's easy to scroll by if people don't want to see it, and it's nice to see someone doing well business wise at the minute.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





EL BROMANCE posted:


She never should've threatened Limmy's dick.

Speaking of Limmy, I hear in sadder news that he had the pleasure of meeting Diana Rigg at a charity do once. Apparently she was surprisingly down to earth, and VERY funny.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





crispix posted:

LETSH ORL TORLK LIKE.................. CHEREMY CLORKSHON

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





Cyril Sneeer posted:

I possibly should not admit this,but arnold swariznneger is a big hero to me. I am a HUGE fan of his. I think it was after I saw terminator II, judgement day in the early 90s n that changed my life abit.

he is not a total oval office also, he seems to understand what it is to be filmstar, and all that goes along with that.

so anyway, this is arnie talking about going to uni: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJsvR_gSEjg

Yeah, does seem to be on the right side in a lot of the 'debates' that matter.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





I had some custom ones made from here https://www.my-picture.co.uk/home-lifestyle/custom-face-mask.jsf

great price and comfortable

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





Tiniest little fireflighting ladder :3:

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





When my parents got a new oven John Lewis wanted £80 or something to take the old ones away, so they decided they’d just take it to the tip themselves, and put it on the driveway.

Within minutes of the delivery van leaving two guys pulled up to the house and asked if they could have them, which was perfect. Seems like they were either following the van round or got a call from their mate in the van.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





kecske posted:

haddock's on the buckfast

Haddock’s on nothing but the finest Loch Lomond, anything else is slander.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





Pseudohog posted:

Roald Dahl lied to me! But I can still get away with murdering someone with a frozen leg of lamb and then roasting it and serving it to the coppers, right?

That was a loving weird story to read as a kid when your precious Dahl experience was all Matilda and James & the Giant Peach.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





Sunday is for chilling, after meeting a girl on Monday, taking her for a drink on Tuesday and making love Wed-Sat.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





Danger - Octopus! posted:

One of the problems that financial services firms have these days is convincing people they're not scammers when they do need to contact you, because people are so used to scams. It's apparently a nightmare for the fraud alerting that banks do where they want to tell customers something doesn't look right on their account, because it just looks like a scam every time even when they're trying to be helpful

Which would be very easy to fix by having a codeword on your account that only the bank knows, and they have to tell you down the phone. But they won't do this because they need to keep a reason why any fraudulent transactions are 'your fault'.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





My favourite bit of 5 Guys trivia is it was founded by a couple and their four sons. And they only named it after the men in the family.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





cynic posted:

Only place I've ever lived where the landlord had a bodyguard with him at all times, fun times. Many years later I caught a news report about hookers/people trafficking and they were plying their trade from my old room so I guess it's a whorehouse now?

Sounds like it might still be the same landlord then?

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





FullLeatherJacket posted:

but if you adjusted rents to reflect actual demand, you'd have to write down the value of your portfolio, which is bad

if you allow the council to put a laminate in the window of what a shop would look like if the shop wasn't closed and also it was the cote d'azur in the 60s, you can borrow against the value of the shop at full price, which is good

Welcome to the concept of a rent free period!! I’m looking at retail space right now and an example of this would be:

“This shop is 20k p/a. If you take it on a five year basis with a 2 year break clause then we will offer a 12 month rent free period as a sweetener”

This allows them to have ‘rented out’ the place for 20k a year, meaning the portfolio isn’t written down and they can point to that rent as a comparison.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





mrpwase posted:

What do you think the stork dressed up as?

Grim Reaper. Real sense of the lifecycle that one.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





Salisbury Snape posted:

Slimming world diet is actually going pretty OK. I'm below 12st for the first time in probably ten years. All this excess beer fat is well on its way out the door

No mean feat over lockdown - congratulations.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





learnincurve posted:

One of the good things about not having played a game in 10 years are all the awesome fully patched game of the year edition games I’ve never played before, Skyrim, fallout, the Witcher III, LA Noir, GTA V and so on are all new to me.

I'm just the same, got back into my consoles after finishing some studies in 2019 and it's been great to catch up on everything.

For what it's worth I think the best 'show off' for the PS4 is Horizon: Zero Dawn. Witcher 3 was a bit of a disappointment graphics wise, RDR2 is very nice, but nothing quite matches Horizon. Spider-man is also great.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





kecske posted:

the new covid jab is being offered to 18-29's lol, I'm too old for that and too young for the other one

:mad: :respek: :mad: rip last jab gang

They're not getting it any sooner I don't think - just when it gets to that age-group they'll be offered a different one.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





When I was working at Tesco in Durham, the self-service checkouts were just becoming a thing, and I was surprised/concerned about the incredible excitement of the staff about them because "It'll make it all much easier / take some of the pressure off staff / etc."

Oh no honey, that's not what corporate is going to do at all. They're just going to get rid of a load of us.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





CancerCakes posted:

Big Tesco or Tes-co met-ro

Big Tes-Coh.

Also, everyone talking about shoplifting being a victimless crime - when I worked at a Tesco express our monthly bonus was linked to not only mystery shopper but also “general loss” which was a combination of expired food (to encourage people to rotate) and “shrinkage” (shoplifting), so it does (did? This was early 2000s) affect staff.

Which is lovely of the companies

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





Non-refundable (taken off your tab) deposits are the way forward, and they've been needed for a while to be honest. Now is the time to get people on board with it - they're desperate enough for a space that they'll put up with it in a way they wouldn't have before all this happened.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





Then that's fine, but like all people you have to invest in your hobby.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





Ratjaculation posted:

Meats leaky shower
watching plumber vids to “learn”
“whoops” this is pornhub

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





I'm assuming this is because they can't go door-to-door at the minute?

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





I had a lift in a friend's new car the other day and the thing parallel parked itself. It was amazing, used cameras to scan for a space, alerted him when it had found one and then at the press of a button parked itself. It's the future.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





God dammit I was just going to post that.

Everyone watch it, it’s incredible. The payoff at the end :discourse:

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





learnincurve posted:

I can’t believe people linked to bike maintenance sites without mentioning the King.

https://sheldonbrown.com/

The absolute King himself. I didn't realise people were still updating his website - that's incredibly awesome.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





Choose Your Gear: cyclists and heroin users compete in a gruelling mountain race, and each has to pick - trade the mountain bike for a single speed, or keep it and take a bunch of smack before the start.

Thinking about it early days of the Tour was all single speeds and coke so it’s not that different.

Red Oktober fucked around with this message at 07:25 on Apr 22, 2021

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





hemale in pain posted:

Do we have a time frame for that? Like do we gotta do it in a week

It’s over a year.

Frankly I think it’s really irresponsible reporting. Pubs are under enough pressure as it is, as asking people to cut down from the last year is poor form.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





Steakandchips posted:

I just got naturalised as a British Citizen this morning. It was a nice ceremony.

CancerCakes posted:

Congrats, your racism is in the post

Yeah, but where are you really from.

congratulations!

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Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!





learnincurve posted:


Naturally they all have the daisy lanyards with mask exempt cards in them.


It’s such a weird correlation this. All but one of the ones that work around my area (south east London) have these lanyards and no masks as well.

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