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DancingShade
Jul 26, 2007

Thank God I avoided that AAA-trainwreck!

Instead I spent 488 hours and 750 American dollars on Richard Garriott's Shroud of the Avatar.


Obviously I'm dumb as fuck, so I'd appreciate you not making fun of me. Thank you!


Prop Wash posted:

If your space court is not displaying a star citizen flag with gold edges then it is not a legitimate space court of law, also my name is *click burp bwzzzzzzt* so good luck getting that right

What a coincidence, *click burp bwzzzzzzt* is exactly the same sound a fat space cop makes when he tazes a "Free Man".

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Sushi in Yiddish
Feb 2, 2008




Mods, please rename thread to "Doubters, inc"

Seraph84
Aug 9, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 2836 days!


Sushi in Yiddish posted:

Mods, please rename thread to "Doubters, inc"
"You can join in for a small fee" ought to be changed to "the first dose is always free". My first pledge was for $35 in November '13. I remember thinking it wouldn't be a big deal if the game ended up as vapor, cause I'd only be out $35.

Sjonnar
Oct 22, 2011


Seraph84 posted:

"You can join in for a small fee" ought to be changed to "the first dose is always free". My first pledge was for $35 in November '13. I remember thinking it wouldn't be a big deal if the game ended up as vapor, cause I'd only be out $35.

Hey, you're a bitcoin billionaire. Even when the game ends up as vapor, you're only out a couple grand, no big deal.
Unless of course, you're not really rich and you blew your life savings on pictures of spaceships.

Sjonnar
Oct 22, 2011


Hey, what do you think of my spaceship names seraph, pretty cool huh?

Seraph84
Aug 9, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 2836 days!


Sjonnar posted:

Hey, what do you think of my spaceship names seraph, pretty cool huh?
Sorry plebescrub, I only talk to cool guys with avatars.

Sjonnar
Oct 22, 2011


Seraph84 posted:

Sorry plebescrub, I only talk to cool guys with avatars.

Then buy me an AV, dirtbag.

Seraph84
Aug 9, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 2836 days!


Sjonnar posted:

Then buy me an AV, dirtbag.
Get a job kid, or earn your av with funny posts like everyone else did.

On second thought, just get a job. I can already tell you don't have what it takes to make me so much as smirk, let alone laugh.

Sjonnar
Oct 22, 2011


Hey, i dunno if you noticed, but your "girlfriend" has no hips and a flat butt.
Are you sure that's not your butt wearing some 13-year-old's panties you bought off ebay?

Fil5000
Jun 23, 2003

HOLD ON GUYS I'M POSTING ABOUT INTERNET ROBOTS


Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me
I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed
She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb
In the shape of an "L" on her forehead

Sjonnar
Oct 22, 2011


Seraph84 posted:

Get a job kid, or earn your av with funny posts like everyone else did.

On second thought, just get a job. I can already tell you don't have what it takes to make me so much as smirk, let alone laugh.

But why would you want me to be a poor wageslave like you? I thought you were a cool anti-capitalist anarchist who wanted to free the world from the tyranny of fiat currency.

Seraph84
Aug 9, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 2836 days!


Sjonnar posted:

I thought you were a cool anti-capitalist anarchist who wanted to free the world from the tyranny of fiat currency.
I want to liberate everyone except you.

Beer4TheBeerGod
Aug 23, 2004

*BEEP*
*BOOP*
M'SPREADSHEET



Exciting Lemon

Dusty Lens posted:

If the Cutlass ends up being the ship people use to do things that otherwise are reserved for $73289038120 behemoth ships that's not a terrible thing.

The ship still doesn't justify its huge engines or cross section. But, oh well.

Maybe it'll have a space court module.

In another thread Calix acknowledged that the Cutlass needs to be fixed from a thruster standpoint.

motorocker posted:

Does anyone own a ship on this thread?

Im vested in my Retaliator joke. Beer seems sad about the Cutlass.

Does anyone else, aside from that weird guy, actually have a ship? Just curious.

If you sold it on Reddit for dollars, congratulations.

I have a pair of Avengers, Reliant, Delta, Cutlass, Caterpillar, and Retaliator. The Avengers and Delta were from cheap packages I bought with that AMD game promotion last year (like $10 each) and they're so I can lend them to Goons.

Sushi in Yiddish
Feb 2, 2008



Fil5000 posted:

Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me
I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed
She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb
In the shape of an "L" on her forehead

Well the pledge starts comin' and it don't stop comin
Plead to the whales and you hit the crowd fundin'

flamingdawg
May 25, 2006


Seraph84 posted:

So what's everybody naming their ships? Here's my ideas so far:
  • Mustang: Sally
  • P-52 Merlin: Hitachi Magic Wand
  • Super Hornet: A Better Mousetrap
  • Starfarer Gemini: Tor Pedo Bait
  • Redeemer: Bite the Pillow
  • Caterpillar: Goin in Dry Awkward Boner
  • Merchantman: Seems Legit
  • Reclaimer: Pubbie Donation Processing
  • Endeavor: Fat Pink Mast (ship will obv be pink; currently this ship exists as a Carrack awaiting melt day)
  • Javelin Destroyer: Problem Child

shut up

DoctorStrangelove
Jun 6, 2012

IT WOULD NOT BE DIFFICULT MEIN FUHRER!



Seraph84 posted:

So what's everybody naming their ships? Here's my ideas so far:
  • Mustang: Sally
  • P-52 Merlin: Hitachi Magic Wand
  • Super Hornet: A Better Mousetrap
  • Starfarer Gemini: Tor Pedo Bait
  • Redeemer: Bite the Pillow
  • Caterpillar: Goin in Dry Awkward Boner
  • Merchantman: Seems Legit
  • Reclaimer: Pubbie Donation Processing
  • Endeavor: Fat Pink Mast (ship will obv be pink; currently this ship exists as a Carrack awaiting melt day)
  • Javelin Destroyer: Problem Child

u should name you're ships after the kids you've diddled.

Seraph84
Aug 9, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 2836 days!


DoctorStrangelove posted:

u should name you're ships after the kids you've diddled.
Guize I am ships?

Variable 5
Apr 17, 2007
random

Grimey Drawer

Seraph84 posted:

Guize I am ships?

Stop posting

Seraph84
Aug 9, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 2836 days!


Variable 5 posted:

Stop posting
Please refer to my avatar, the alphagoon does not take instructions from betas. In order to challenge my Alphagoon status you will need to provide proof (to the satisfaction of this committee) of:

Until then, sit down and shut up.

Thank you and warm regards,

Seraph,

The real Alphagoon

Seraph84 fucked around with this message at Aug 22, 2015 around 16:56

DoctorStrangelove
Jun 6, 2012

IT WOULD NOT BE DIFFICULT MEIN FUHRER!



Seraph84 posted:

Please refer to my avatar, the alphagoon does not take instructions from betas. In order to challenge my Alphagoon status you will need to provide proof (to the satisfaction of this committee) of:
  • Physical fitness
  • Financial solvency
  • Non-fat girlfriend or gently caress buddy
  • Intelligence
  • Wit

Guess that means you're more of a gamma goon.

Sjonnar
Oct 22, 2011


Guys, stop pissing him off. Some barely adolescent girl is gonna pay for that later.

Decrepus
May 21, 2008

In the end, his dominion did not touch a single poster.

I spent my whole SSD check on Star Citizen this month lol

Tank Boy Ken
Aug 24, 2012
J4G for life

Fallen Rib

Seraph84 posted:

[*] Physical fitness
[*] Financial solvency
[*] Non-fat girlfriend or gently caress buddy
[*] Intelligence
[*] Wit[/list]

I don't recall any proof you posted here.

Seraph84
Aug 9, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 2836 days!


DoctorStrangelove posted:

Guess that means you're more of a gamma goon.
I almost forgot, there's a sixth criterion for alphagoon status here in the Star Citizen thread. It's one that most of the evegoons will forever hopelessly fail at: twitch skill.

Tank Boy Ken posted:

I don't recall any proof you posted here.
Please refer to my Alphagoon Assertion Post, now with links.

Seraph84 fucked around with this message at Aug 22, 2015 around 16:52

Variable 5
Apr 17, 2007
random

Grimey Drawer

Sjonnar posted:

Guys, stop pissing him off. Some barely adolescent girl is gonna pay for that later.

Oh? Is he looking for slightly older targets now?

DoctorStrangelove
Jun 6, 2012

IT WOULD NOT BE DIFFICULT MEIN FUHRER!



Seraph84 posted:

I almost forgot, there's a sixth criterion for alphagoon status here in the Star Citizen thread, one that most of the evegoons will forever hopelessly fail at: twitch skill.

Don't loving talk to me about FPS skill you little faggotbitch. I am Somethingawful-dot-com's top rated JOHN ROMERO'S DAIKATANA, the only true pure expert FPS, player and I will loving destroy you. Come on, 1v1 me bro. Unless you're too scared.

Tank Boy Ken
Aug 24, 2012
J4G for life

Fallen Rib

Seraph84 posted:

I almost forgot, there's a sixth criterion for alphagoon status here in the Star Citizen thread. It's one that most of the evegoons will forever hopelessly fail at: twitch skill.

48% win, 1.26 Kd. Are those your stats? And do you consider them good?

Fil5000
Jun 23, 2003

HOLD ON GUYS I'M POSTING ABOUT INTERNET ROBOTS


It seems the only winning move is not to put any effort into posting

Seraph84
Aug 9, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 2836 days!


Tank Boy Ken posted:

48% win, 1.26 Kd. Are those your stats? And do you consider them good?
I prefer to play the underdog team, and will usually switch to the losing side when a game becomes one-sided, as they often do. PTFO stands for "play the loving objective". Battlefield isn't about KDR, go back to Counterstrike, child.



Fil5000 posted:

It seems the only winning move is not to put any effort into posting
There is no winning move. The game is already over, you've lost.

Seraph84 fucked around with this message at Aug 22, 2015 around 17:00

Tank Boy Ken
Aug 24, 2012
J4G for life

Fallen Rib

Seraph84 posted:

I prefer to play the underdog team, and will usually switch to the losing side when a game becomes one-sided, as they often do. Battlefield isn't about KDR, go back to Counterstrike, child.

same.

The Marauder
Dec 1, 2013

Why walk out when you can outrun?


Seraph84 posted:

I almost forgot, there's a sixth criterion for alphagoon status here in the Star Citizen thread. It's one that most of the evegoons will forever hopelessly fail at: twitch skill.

Please refer to my Alphagoon Assertion Post, now with links.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NsZMbs5PC64

Raskolnikov
Nov 25, 2003



I am the only white noise poster that matters in this thread.

I also have spaceships.

quote="Fil5000" post="449282125"]
It seems the only winning move is not to put any effort into posting
[/quote]it is the star citizen thread.

Tank Boy Ken
Aug 24, 2012
J4G for life

Fallen Rib

Seraph84 posted:


"intelligence"

Seraph84 posted:

You are gravely mistaken if you think a twenty-first century revolution would be so similar to the ones you've read about in your history books. The future is almost always unrecognizable to the past, just as the past almost always appears to be farcical lunacy to we who occupy the present.

Violence is the lifeblood of capitalism, sustaining it even now. It will not be a violent seizing of wealth that closes this chapter of human history, but anti-violence - empathy. It will be an emerging ethical framework well-rooted in reason and untainted by economic fundamentalism.

When we're ready, we won't have to force the rich to give up their fortunes at the barrel of a gun. They will give it to us willingly, because by that time sufficient needless tragedy will have been caused by capitalism that (almost) no one will want to play that game anymore. A decent analogy for this is the total impossibility of a properly fascist regime emerging in Germany today. As an aside, I suspect Germany will likely be one of the first places the new civilization emerges.

"Wit" != this;

Seraph84 posted:

Methinks thou doth protest too much. The way to spot a closet hebephile is the same way you spot a closet homosexual - look for the ones who bash it.

ITT: A bunch of dudes so terrified by their own sexuality that they witch hunt anyone who dares to plainly tell it like it is. We all know 75% of you nerds beat it to pubescent-girl anime porn three or more times per week, so just drop this asinine moral-pretense and admit you want to gently caress teenage looking girls.

Your posts are the best arguments against your "proofs". I guess this doesn't make you think.

Seraph84
Aug 9, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 2836 days!


I don't think you understand how this process works, Ken. Trying to knock me off the pedestal that you yourself have elevated me to from down there in the smelly crowd of turdlings only makes you look bad.

You have to put up or shut up.

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

(USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST)

DoctorStrangelove
Jun 6, 2012

IT WOULD NOT BE DIFFICULT MEIN FUHRER!



You have no loving claim to FPS skill until you 1v1 me in JOHN ROMERO'S DAIKATANA you goddamn cockbreath commie motherfucker.

Raskolnikov
Nov 25, 2003



I honestly don't understand why none of these losers get it.

*kisses curled bicep and points in mirror*

Sedisp
Jun 20, 2012



Did you know Seraph that it's scientifically proven that most men don't have their brains tell them it's time to reproduce when they're looking at teenagers?

So maybe stop projecting?

Goredema
Oct 16, 2013

RUIN EVERYTHING



Fun Shoe


Fil5000
Jun 23, 2003

HOLD ON GUYS I'M POSTING ABOUT INTERNET ROBOTS


http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=qTxUKRkOoHM

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Tank Boy Ken
Aug 24, 2012
J4G for life

Fallen Rib

Seraph84 posted:

I don't think you understand how this process works,
shut up.

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