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Nyaa
Jan 7, 2010

Q.E.D.



Observe ufo aduction.

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Swedish Thaumocracy
Jul 11, 2006

Strength of >800 Men
Honor of 0


Grimey Drawer

Whats Updog?

You tell your crew to spread out without entering the clearing, keeping all their eyes out for danger and in general being on high alert.
You creep closer to the hovering dog and look at it thoughtfully.

You try to think of something elaborate to say, something to show your team that you are still in charge of the situation, no matter how weird it gets.

But all you come up with is:"Hey, Dog." "What are you doing up there?"

The dog, being a dog, looks super excited at having been addressed, wags his tail and starts running towards you. Tries too at least.

But each step forward brings it further away, higher into the air.
It gives a confused whine, which sounds to your ears as if coming from far, far away.



Another breeze. And somewhere is the distant a deep, guttural roar.



What do you do?

Theantero
Nov 6, 2011

...they shall march out of my laboratory and sweep away every adversary, every creed, every nation, until the very planet is in the loving grip of the Pax Bisonica. And then peace will reign, and the world, and all humanity, shall bow to me in humble gratitude...

Okay. I'm suspecting some sort of displacer beast or equivalent. Have Kvelar and Skvababt ready their ranged weapons, but stay out of sight. If the beast goes to eat the dog, allow it to approach it. Then observe if chunks start to disappear. If it really is a displacer beast, then it probably is not where it appears to be, and we should shoot where the chunks start disappearing from instead.

Of course, it could be something entirely different. We'll have to wait and see.

Nyaa
Jan 7, 2010

Q.E.D.



I still laments the fact that we don't have explosive gnome.

Have Skvababt circles to A9 for two-pronged range attack.

Swedish Thaumocracy
Jul 11, 2006

Strength of >800 Men
Honor of 0


Grimey Drawer

Who took the dogs out? Chomp, chomp chomp!

You motion for Skvababt to circle around to try to get a bead on the beast, telling her to shoot not where it looks to be but rather where it's eating from.
She looks at you quizzically with one of her giant eyes, tilting her head to one side to get a better look at you.


"Whatever you say, gorgeous."

You can't help but feel slightly tingly as she leaves your presence, running around the edge of the clearing to get a better shot at whatever monster dare (not?) show its face.

"Kvelar! Crossbow!"

"Aye, at the ready!"

"The rest of you, lay low! We don't know what we are facing but it probably won't be where it seems like it is!"

They nod, they wait. Every muscle tense.

The dogs ears perk up, it turns to look at something that only it can see and gets very frightened.
As if in a waking nightmare it tries to reach your embrace, the only source of comfort in this twisted world, but for all it's efforts finds itself retreating, dragged ever upward and away from you.

The world around it distorts into the lack of a shape, the wrongness of it all fascinating rather than startling.

The dog whines, looking terrified. It covers it's eyes with it's paws and runs around in a circle, desperate to figure out how to get away.

The absence covers it entirely, the dog disappearing and reappearing in view as if your view was blocked, yet there is nothing visible to block it.

Yet there is obviously something there.

*TWANG*

Skvababts arrow flies through the air, sails right through the nothing and right through the dog as well. It appears unharmed

Kvelars bolt flies true, but bounces of off something invisible? halfway to it's target.



What do you do?

1 :Keep firing?
Yes/No

2: Any other orders?

Nyaa
Jan 7, 2010

Q.E.D.



Throw a bottle of oil at G6, if it covers something invisible, throw a torch to lit it.

Nothingtoseehere
Nov 11, 2010



Nyaa posted:

Throw a bottle of oil at G6, if it covers something invisible, throw a torch to lit it.

Area effect weapons, the best weapon aganist invisible monsters. Do we have any bags of sawdust, fine grain, or any other type of powder?

Swedish Thaumocracy
Jul 11, 2006

Strength of >800 Men
Honor of 0


Grimey Drawer

nothing to seehere posted:

Area effect weapons, the best weapon aganist invisible monsters. Do we have any bags of sawdust, fine grain, or any other type of powder?

You would have, had you voted to bring those with you when preparing for the trip. As it is, you only have basic tools, armour and weapons.

I suppose you could cut down a tree or two with your battleaxe and hack at it for an hour, collect all the dust in a coat and then throw that?
The monster might eat you before then, however. I make no guarantees.

You did pack extra oil though. Don't think I haven't noticed your constant urges to set everything on fire.

Hot Dog Day 80
Jun 23, 2003


Nyaa posted:

Throw a bottle of oil at G6, if it covers something invisible, throw a torch to lit it.

burn it to the ground

Arkanomen
May 6, 2007

All he wants is a hug


When in doubt, toss fire about. Throw a torch at it!

It's a shame it's not a little darker so we could see if the thing casts a shadow. Some smoke may help in tracking. I also want to see if it's forcefield deflects objects based on speed.

Ms. Happiness
Aug 26, 2009



Should we throw the oil at G7 since that's where the arrow bounced off something?

Swedish Thaumocracy
Jul 11, 2006

Strength of >800 Men
Honor of 0


Grimey Drawer

Whatever you are fighting is within range for your archers but throwing a torch or bottle of oil at it is another matter.
None of you are expert throwers, even if Kvelar probably does have pretty decent upper body strength.
Khami could attempt a chain-swing-oil-sling but it would take some time to rig up.

Not to mention the fact that the monster seems to be up in the air.

To have any decent chance of hitting whatever it is you need to get a bit closer.
Do you wish to enter the clearing to get a better shot at it?

Nyaa
Jan 7, 2010

Q.E.D.



New plan: Toss oil bottle upward to the top of G6, Kvelar & Skvababt shoot an arrow at the bottle mid-air to rain oil.

Everyone else throw their lit-torch.


Edit: Not sure if shooting a fire arrow would be better.

Nyaa fucked around with this message at Nov 8, 2015 around 21:16

Theantero
Nov 6, 2011

...they shall march out of my laboratory and sweep away every adversary, every creed, every nation, until the very planet is in the loving grip of the Pax Bisonica. And then peace will reign, and the world, and all humanity, shall bow to me in humble gratitude...

Ok so a brilliant plan:

Konnie seems to be the lightest of us (well, except Skvababt but she is too far away) Have Khami tie his chain around Konnie, then have Konnie advance into the clearing and throw the lit oil at the creature (or where-ever we think it is), and then have him retreat. If the monster tries weird spacetime pulling shenanigans, we can just pull Konnie back as a group. Or at least try to.

Now I admit this is very dangerous and possibly dumb, but it at least gives us a failsafe if things go wrong. Also, plan Nyaa is unfeasible, since I doubt we are that accurate.

Theantero fucked around with this message at Nov 9, 2015 around 16:26

Swedish Thaumocracy
Jul 11, 2006

Strength of >800 Men
Honor of 0


Grimey Drawer

Nyaa posted:

New plan: Toss oil bottle upward to the top of G6, Kvelar & Skvababt shoot an arrow at the bottle mid-air to rain oil.

Everyone else throw their lit-torch.


Edit: Not sure if shooting a fire arrow would be better.

I'm not saying this is impossible, but it is a VERY tricky shot to pull off. Not only do they have to hit the bottle, they have to break it as well.
In midair, when the arrow is on fire.

Not to mention the fact that your oil is of the slow-burning torch variety and not Naphta or Alchemist Fire, and wouldn't actually explode.
(Should have recruited that Gnome I guess!)

If the idea is to just spread oil over a large area, just throwing the bottle should do the trick as it would shatter when it hit the ground.

Nyaa
Jan 7, 2010

Q.E.D.



Swedish Thaumocracy posted:

If the idea is to just spread oil over a large area, just throwing the bottle should do the trick as it would shatter when it hit the ground.
Will this include enemy on air?

Swedish Thaumocracy
Jul 11, 2006

Strength of >800 Men
Honor of 0


Grimey Drawer

Nyaa posted:

Will this include enemy on air?

I.... you don't know?

Have you ever thrown a bottle at a dog before? Did it break?

The monster, whatever it is, seems to be invisible, or something else entirely? An arrow went right through it.
If you where to take a guess; the bottle might break on the grown beneath it? But you can't hit it with a bottle without going closer.

paper bag with a face
Jun 2, 2007
Fighting poverty...one bum at a time.

Theantero posted:

Ok so a brilliant plan:

Konnie seems to be the lightest of us (well, except Skvababt but she is too far away) Have Khami tie his chain around Konnie, then have Konnie advance into the clearing and throw the lit oil at the creature (or where-ever we think it is), and then have him retreat. If the monster tries weird spacetime pulling shenanigans, we can just pull Konnie back as a group. Or at least try to.

Now I admit this is very dangerous and possibly dumb, but it at least gives us a failsafe if things go wrong. Also, plan Nyaa is unfeasible, since I doubt we are that accurate.

Seems like a p. good plan.

Outrail
Jan 4, 2009

www.sapphicrobotica.com


Just found this CYOA, it's wierd.

Throw handfuls of mud all over the place.

Swedish Thaumocracy
Jul 11, 2006

Strength of >800 Men
Honor of 0


Grimey Drawer

You Seem to Want to Set the World On Fire

You bark swift orders. You reason the monster must have noticed you by now and you don't like your odds of facing it head on, considering it seems to be invisible.
At least in this moment you know where it is.

Khami wraps his chain around Konnie at your command, and the rogue readies his bottle of oil just as you ready your torch and your archers ready their respective bows.

The Absence covers the alleydog completely, but you can still hear it, far off. It doesn't sound happy.

Neither does Konnie as he steps into the clearing. He goes partly transperant and seems to wobble for a moment, before stabalizing five feet to the left of where he entered.

He looks sickly pale, as if he is about to vomit, but finds a second wind somehow and shakes it off.
Precious seconds are lost, however and a sickly slice is heard from where you guesstimate the monster to be.
He throws the oil bottle, taking care to arc it upwards as possible.

Kvelar and Skvababt both fire their arrows, but they don't hit anything of note.

The bottle smashes into something in the air, breaks, and leaks its contents all over the area.
Unless your eyes deceive you, it seems to be running down the side of a hill?
The clearing does have a downward incline, but no protrusions or even hints of harbouring what the oil has now revealed.
It must have also been invisible?

Your suspicion is confirmed a moment later when Konnie yells back to you.

"I can see it! I can see it! It's right there on the hill! Shoot it! It's big and dark but it's right there, shoot it! Pull me back!"

You nod to Khami and throw your torch, it lands right next to the rapidly spreading pool of oil.
Any moment now it will catch fire, you just hope it's soon enough.

Kvelar and Skvababt fire more arrows in it's general direction, but both miss.
The bolt embeds itself in the hill and the arrow goes straight through the monster again.
It roars in defiance.



What do you do?

Nyaa
Jan 7, 2010

Q.E.D.



Everyone move to Skvababt

Hot Dog Day 80
Jun 23, 2003


MORE FIRE

GloriousDemon
May 1, 2009


Yell for Skvababt to shoot the peak of the hill and not directly at the monster.

Theantero
Nov 6, 2011

...they shall march out of my laboratory and sweep away every adversary, every creed, every nation, until the very planet is in the loving grip of the Pax Bisonica. And then peace will reign, and the world, and all humanity, shall bow to me in humble gratitude...

So Konnie could see the monster huh? Okay, so here is what I think is going on. The monster somehow forms a bubble in space around itself, so that light and arrows and other projectiles pass through it, even through living creatures (and their equipment? I don't know about the specifics, maybe only things that are going fast enough such as light and arrows are warped) making it invisible and unassailable by projectiles. The weird flickering happens when you enter the bubble, and that is why Konnie could see it.

Basically, I think this monster can only be assailed within the bubble. Perhaps the flames can sneak inside the bubble, so we should wait for the oil to light up, and tell people other than Skvababt to ready melee weapons, tell them the bubble hypothesis so they will be prepared and also:

GloriousDemon posted:

Yell for Skvababt to shoot the peak of the hill and not directly at the monster.

This, tell Skvababt to fire at the invisible parts of the hill. Maybe I'm wrong, and projectiles can hurt the monster after all and she was just firing at the wrong spot. Its not like she can contribute in any way if I'm right, so might as well use her to test if I'm wrong.

(GM Question: Did Kvelar's bolt embed itself on the invisible part of the hill?)

Ask Konnie: Did he spot any differences in the terrain while he saw the monster? Maybe its bubble is completely detached from this reality and the fire won't even hurt it.


In addition, it seems that the creature tries to catch prey by teleporting them, since that (or something similar) is what it did to Konnie.

Swedish Thaumocracy
Jul 11, 2006

Strength of >800 Men
Honor of 0


Grimey Drawer

Theantero posted:

(GM Question: Did Kvelar's bolt embed itself on the invisible part of the hill?)

That is what it looks like, yes.

Theantero posted:

Ask Konnie: Did he spot any differences in the terrain while he saw the monster? Maybe its bubble is completely detached from this reality and the fire won't even hurt it.

You yell "What's it like in there?!"


"By the Emperor's bulgin' muscles it's weird! Everythin's shiftin, all the colours are gone and and it's raining upwards.
Some sort of giant animal is eating the dog?, or it was, it's spotted us now. I think it's angry!"

Theantero
Nov 6, 2011

...they shall march out of my laboratory and sweep away every adversary, every creed, every nation, until the very planet is in the loving grip of the Pax Bisonica. And then peace will reign, and the world, and all humanity, shall bow to me in humble gratitude...

Swedish Thaumocracy posted:


"By the Emperor's bulgin' muscles it's weird! Everythin's shiftin, all the colours are gone and and it's raining upwards.
Some sort of giant animal is eating the dog?, or it was, it's spotted us now. I think it's angry!"

HOW GIANT!?

Nyaa
Jan 7, 2010

Q.E.D.



Theantero posted:

HOW GIANT!?
This hill is the monster

Theantero
Nov 6, 2011

...they shall march out of my laboratory and sweep away every adversary, every creed, every nation, until the very planet is in the loving grip of the Pax Bisonica. And then peace will reign, and the world, and all humanity, shall bow to me in humble gratitude...

Nyaa posted:

This hill is the monster

Not necessarily. There could be empty space there too, since the monster seems to live in some sort of weird pocket dimension.

Swedish Thaumocracy
Jul 11, 2006

Strength of >800 Men
Honor of 0


Grimey Drawer

Theantero posted:

HOW GIANT!?


"Is [removed by the ministry for common decency] huge innit?
Like a bear or somethin'? Sgivin me a headache just to look at it."

Theantero
Nov 6, 2011

...they shall march out of my laboratory and sweep away every adversary, every creed, every nation, until the very planet is in the loving grip of the Pax Bisonica. And then peace will reign, and the world, and all humanity, shall bow to me in humble gratitude...

Use our keen Dwarven Spatial Awareness to figure out if the invisible hill lump is about bear-sized.

Swedish Thaumocracy
Jul 11, 2006

Strength of >800 Men
Honor of 0


Grimey Drawer

Theantero posted:

Use our keen Dwarven Spatial Awareness to figure out if the invisible hill lump is about bear-sized.

The invisible hill is hill sized. The monster is probably standing on top of it?

Theantero
Nov 6, 2011

...they shall march out of my laboratory and sweep away every adversary, every creed, every nation, until the very planet is in the loving grip of the Pax Bisonica. And then peace will reign, and the world, and all humanity, shall bow to me in humble gratitude...

Swedish Thaumocracy posted:

The invisible hill is hill sized. The monster is probably standing on top of it?

Huh. Well, let's go with the original plan then. Order archers to shoot at the hilltop while waiting stuff to catch fire. Brace for impact, keep an eye out for changing distortions to figure out if the monster is on the move.

Theantero fucked around with this message at Nov 10, 2015 around 16:05

Theantero
Nov 6, 2011

...they shall march out of my laboratory and sweep away every adversary, every creed, every nation, until the very planet is in the loving grip of the Pax Bisonica. And then peace will reign, and the world, and all humanity, shall bow to me in humble gratitude...

Actually, after speaking with Thaum on IRC and thinking about this a bit, I'm starting to feel that this waiting around plan is a no-go. Perhaps we should just advance, and tell everyone to prepare for warpy shenanigans. Konnie could see the monster, and I am increasingly confident it can only be engaged in the clearing. If the internal dimensions are at all similar, Skvababt should still be able to shoot since she will be far away from the monster. Kvelar should take the point, us advance behind them, Khami and Konnie on our right flank (aka. where they are now).

Theantero fucked around with this message at Nov 10, 2015 around 16:07

Nyaa
Jan 7, 2010

Q.E.D.



change to plan theantero

Outrail
Jan 4, 2009

www.sapphicrobotica.com


Do we have spears? Slow advance with a spear wall sorts most things out.

Wentley
Feb 7, 2012


Is it a magic snail?

Swedish Thaumocracy
Jul 11, 2006

Strength of >800 Men
Honor of 0


Grimey Drawer

Outrail posted:

Do we have spears? Slow advance with a spear wall sorts most things out.

No. Your recruits weapon, estimate skill and weapon preferences are listed in last months Inventory briefing.

To summarize it you currently have:

Kvelar with an axe and hand crossbow.
Yourself with an axe.
Skvababt with a longbow.
Konnie with daggers.
Khami with an iron chain.

Swedish Thaumocracy
Jul 11, 2006

Strength of >800 Men
Honor of 0


Grimey Drawer

The Other Clearing

You rush your team up to Skvababt to mount some sort of group-offence, taking care to pull Konnie back in before the monster notices him fully.

Behind you the oil catches fire, and through the flickering flames you can piece together an absence of some great forest creature, all rage and hunger.
The void of it's arms is tearing into the corpse of a dog as fire spreads all around it, but it doesn't seem fazed.



You step into the clearing. The colour drains from your world, a rain that wasn't there before caresses your cheeks on it's way into the sky.
The fire is nowhere to be seen and your first step takes you somewhere else -.
Your brain is ready for the sudden jault since you saw it happen to Konnie, but your body still finds the experience extremely disturbing.

Instead of a clearing you see a large hill in the distance, the ground towards it inclining upward far more than your feet tell you it should.
You close your left eye experimentally and see yourself standing back in the clearing and your sudden headache tells you this is a really bad idea.
You open them again and focus, trying to find any trace of the monster that Konnie was screaming about.

"Ain't anything there? Alright, ITEC! Advance! Get ready for anything!"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nff5AOJbEOs
(still image)

As if on cue, the monster appears, phasing into view. The size of a large bear, it stands on two thick legs and menaces with long sharp claws on it's front paws.
The head is crowned by skeletal antlers and it's lack of eyes look directly at you. It's jaws open, but you cannot hear anything.
All sound except that of your own voice and an echo of fire is muted.

Your team steps into the clearing behind you, and everyone except Kvelar seems to take the trip well.
He is down on his knees, clutching his head.

"Ugh, What is this place?" He says, shaking it off.

You ready your weapons, the monster charges.
Battle is upon you.

What do you do?

Swedish Thaumocracy fucked around with this message at Nov 10, 2015 around 21:14

Nothingtoseehere
Nov 11, 2010



FIIIIIIIGHT!

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Arkanomen
May 6, 2007

All he wants is a hug


Continual ranged harassment while ranged weapon users hammer it.

We cannot engage in melee. We don't know if it's toxic to touch. We can keep it shifting direction and attention by throwing rocks etc. so it can't get close with those claws. Be ready for some acid vomit or other terrible crap, but it's a bear. Just harass it until it's dead, or tired enough we burn it.

I'm thinking that some undead realm is leaking into the world, or maybe the veil between the mundane and spiritual is thinning, allowing celestial repo men and weindigo-bears to sneak through. Poor dog.

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