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Happy Sisyphus posted:why do so many nerds wear hats they look really bad To keep the cringe in.
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 01:40 |
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# ? Apr 29, 2024 04:16 |
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"Are you going to be ok?" A stifled sniffle filled the dark room. Lesnick wiped his eyes, trying not to face the strange man standing in his living room. "I'll be fine," he whispered, letting the xbox 360 controller fall from his fingers. The strange man, clad in tight, neon lit clothing, caught the controller. "Take all the time you need," the man said, wrapping up the controller. He hit the eject button on the xbox and took out the blank disc with "Star Citizen" scrawled in black marker and put it in his pocket. "How...how," Lesnick whispered, shaking his head. "I get this all the time," the man said, kneeling down to face Lesnick, "from you. Different you's mind you. But you. I've traveled to hundreds of alternate dimensions where Star Citizen will never come out. In fact, I have yet to find a universe beyond my own where it did come out. It may have something to do with Erin Roberts taking over after Chris choked on spit and died at Citizencon..." "It can't be. It can't be. My..I mean Star Citizen is coming out. It is," Lesnick said, attempting to fold his arms in protest. Failing that, he pouted. The man smiled and dipped his head towards the ground. "It won't. My computer has determined this is another universe where it will never happen. That is why I came to you tonight. Across the universes your name is spoken as the one true fan. And so I came to you with the only playable copy of Star Citizen so that you may play it one time." Lesnick wiped more tears that appeared on his face. "It just can't be. It was supposed to be a grand game. It was supposed to be...be...more than that." The man slapped Lesnick's considerable thigh as he stood. "I am afraid the reality is worse than the dream. That's all it was ever going to be." Lesnick looked up at the man with hopeful eyes. "But there is still time isn't there? We can turn this ship around, we can concentrate, learn form our mist--" The man held up a hand. "I'm sorry Ben, but it's too late. Just take the gift I have given you and appreciate it for what it is. I have many, many more universes to visit." The man melted into the darkness and disappeared from Ben's view. Ben spent the next hour crawling up the stairs, thinking of the strange visit. By the time he reached bed, where his lovely wife slept without a care, he was out of breath. He got into bed as gently as he could, which meant when his body hit the mattress his wife only flew three feet into the air. She landed on him. "Mmmm, you okay baby?" she said in a sleepy tone. He grasped her, holding her close. She started to sink into his folds. "Yeah. Yeah I will be. I just need to hold you." Ben listened as she fell back asleep, and looked out the window. He sighed. "See you in the 'verse commando," the man's faint voice lifted Ben's face to the corner of the room where he stood. The man winked, then picked up a strange glowing object. "I dropped my teleporter by accident. Goodbye Ben." "Wait." The man hesitated. "I need to know your name. Who are you, who have traveled through time and the cosmos to show me my worst nightmare?" The man smiled and tapped a name tag sewn onto his uniform. "You can call me Major Tom."
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 01:42 |
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CrcleSqreSanchz posted:"Are you going to be ok?" the fanfic developed by this thread is great i am actually super into it
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 01:44 |
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G0RF posted:The implication seems to me that a CIG-friendly goon is running meta-con and it hints (I think?) that Derek's (new?) source(s?) have been feeding him bogus intel to set up for a later big reveal. Which could itself be true. Or could be a reverse meta-con against SC believers in that subreddit. Or maybe I'm just misreading it altogether. I like the possibilities of it for the "Who's Zoomin' Who?" S. All I know is that in 3-4 days some funny poo poo is going to happen no matter how it plays out. And we'll still have plenty of time afterwards to , either a post-mortem or a running commentary of this clusterfuck.
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 01:45 |
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SomethingJones posted:I'm 6 pages behind but transcripts incoming soon. Awesome, I tried watching in normal speed and half speed. It's like a choice between coke and xanax. Also INN's transcripts are a joke.
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 01:46 |
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Will Sandi bring some tears to the announcement when it happens?
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 01:46 |
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jaegerx posted:Will Sandi bring some tears to the announcement when it happens? Someone please post the CryEngine pic with Sandi crying.
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 01:49 |
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Toops posted:Weekly update is up guys!
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 01:50 |
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these little moments are my new favorite thing.
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 01:55 |
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Toops posted:Weekly update is up guys! Like, a couple of dude doing this for laffs can make something faster than CIG... lookin' good!
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 01:57 |
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CrcleSqreSanchz posted:"Are you going to be ok?" It continually amazes me how this thread manages to turn eternal incompetence into inspired work. Well done!
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:00 |
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In the last two pages, TWICE I've had to stifle my laughter into the sleeve of my hoodie so as not to wake anyone. SP is looking awesome, and the Lesnick Chronicles are print-worthy material.
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:02 |
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G0RF posted:The implication seems to me that a CIG-friendly goon is running meta-con and it hints (I think?) that Derek's (new?) source(s?) have been feeding him bogus intel to set up for a later big reveal. Which could itself be true. Or could be a reverse meta-con against SC believers in that subreddit. Or maybe I'm just misreading it altogether. I like the possibilities of it for the "Who's Zoomin' Who?" S. It looks like an inverse-reverse troll to me. Best to disregard it. e.g. https://www.reddit.com/r/DerekSmart/comments/4ccejv/dereks_prediction/d1gwmoo
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:04 |
you can call me major tom
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:04 |
also I had sage fried chicken, waffles with bacon in them, and fried leeks for dinner it owned
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:05 |
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Aw shucks thanks all. This thread has given me so many goddamn laughs it's high time I try to pay it back. That and wrestling is boring me the gently caress out right now.
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:05 |
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From 10 for the Chairman: Episode 80 Erin Roberts Mar 28, 2016 @ 10:52 Q: Do you ever find yourself being challenged with a "dream big" mentality vs a "be realistic" mentality? How does that play out for you in your role? A: All the time! Ah, so... uhm... we... eh... we have obviously this HUGE LIST of what we want STAR CITIZEN to be, ah... and what we try and do is really work on, eh, you know, the different stages of getting to... to... you know... THE STARS as it were. And so we spend a lot of time on... um... and if you know if you guys saw the... the size of our, um, DESIGN and what we have and all the different levels we have, which are just like WELL BEYOND you know, um, STUFF WE'LL EVEN DO THIS YEAR and so forth, and a lot of STRETCH GOALS, um, we have... we've got a MASSIVE PLACE we wanna take it, and right now we're just really focussing on the FUNDAMENTALS... of... getting... and you know especially the persis... persistent universe... getting the STANTON SYSTEM in place, getting the CORE, sort of um... features such as PERSISTENCE so you basically can you know, like EARN MONEY, you, you can TRADE, you can do MINING and so forth and those are the first things that we're focussing on... and then also we've got all the smaller things around that, WOTSIT MEAN if you do a CARGO RUN you know, um... how do you have abilities to pirate and intercept a cargo, HOW DOES THAT WORK... if you're in a cargo run and you get taken out of um... ah... getting tak... get... you get taken out of QUANTUM DRIVE, how can you CALL FOR HELP in, you know in the middle of NOWHERE and so forth, and so all these THINGS are sort of... THINGS that we answer as we go along all those kinda STUFF, and we have DESIGNS FOR... but they're the things we're focussing on now to drop in there so players can really get into this... SYSTEM which... you know... the... (sigh)... STANTON SYSTEM is gonna be... a BIGGER PLAY ENVIRONMENT with more going on than... than pretty much any game there already and THEN, we're gonna be dropping in the other systems along with that as well. But YES, it... it's always a BIG TASK to work out, you know... THIS IS WHAT WE WANNA DO and then just focus it down to actually, 'what are the next steps', and that is actually what I've been spending a lot of time here this week in meetings and just working out what are our next steps, ehm you know... ehm you know... for the LATTER HALF OF THIS YEAR on the PERSISTENT UNIVERSE, um, you know to get this STUFF out.
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:06 |
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MilesK posted:Awesome, I tried watching in normal speed and half speed. It's like a choice between coke and xanax. Yeah, they'd save a fortune by cutting down on the amphetamines. edit - oh you mean the different speeds. Normal speed sounds like it's already coked off its tits.
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:07 |
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SomethingJones posted:From 10 for the Chairman: Episode 80 Yes, basically it's all bollocks.
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:08 |
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D_Smart posted:It looks like an inverse-reverse troll to me. Best to disregard it. do you trust your life with the source(s) you got Mr Smart?
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:12 |
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D_Smart posted:Yes, basically it's all bollocks. There is almost no difference between this and one of Chris's transcripts, honestly. They have a HUGE LIST but don't know how a cargo run will work, how you will earn money, or basically any of the basics needed for persistence.
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:14 |
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My prediction is that by the end of the week nothing will happen and Derek will point to his blog post from 127 months ago when he said just that. More lovely patches, more bad sales, more cultists, more goons, but I don't think anything big is happening. Fool me once derek smart...
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:14 |
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I skipped over the last 50 pages andBeer4TheBeerGod posted:Actually that's a lie. I did read it. I just didn't give a poo poo.
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:16 |
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SomethingJones posted:From 10 for the Chairman: Episode 80 EVERYTHING CIG has done from the beginning has been a sales pitch- none of the things in the game are meant to be small pieces of a larger world- they are all just proofs-of-concept. Stanton cannot be integrated as it stands now unless they straight up just have everyone's landing pad be clientside and everyone lands at the same one, forget any sort of visiting of each other's hangars that doesn't involve a Willy Wonka elevator. Arena Commander, Stanton, Crusader- they're all just scraps. Stanton is a separate cryengine level from Crusader, and Crusader itself is its own level with the zero coordinate probably being Olisar. You would think if they were going to build up Crusader into something that would be in the PU, they would make the 0 coordinate be the central star, and throw in some textured sphere placeholders for the other planets with all the Crusader stuff being in a large empty space. That's what they WOULD have done, if Crusader wasn't just a "see??!" thing they pushed out to serve as a proof-of-concept. Okay, so they get those procedural planets into the game- guess they'll just copy-paste the Stanton stuff onto the surface. Oh wait, now not only do they need to completely flesh out the rest of the city because you'll be seeing it from space, but also it makes it obvious how hosed up the scale of everything is. The planet in that video everyone spergs about looks smaller than the moon.
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:16 |
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DigitalMocking posted:Fool me once derek smart... there's an old saying in tennessee-- i know its in texas, probably in tennessee
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:16 |
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What the gently caress, I was down to 7 pages and come back to 34? What the hell happened since 2674? Should I try the Derek Catch-up Protocoltm?
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:17 |
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Daztek posted:I'm not sure which redditors' meltdown I'm looking forward to the most. Either Cymelion or samfreez. Maybe agent mothman I would add wesha and Tarkaroshe to that list.
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:17 |
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The thing is, Derek is right. It's not that the cash was running out to the point where people were going to stop getting paychecks - it ran down (several months ago) to the point where projections placed them running out before getting either Star Citizien or SQ42 done. The cash got to where Chris had to make a choice - Star Citizen, or Squadron 42. Instead of choosing his backers, he chose himself. Anyone who's following this project from the beginning, and those who know Chris's history, knew this. He has been hands on with writing his godawful script, shooting cringe-inducing mo-cap scenes, and paying A-list actors enormous sums so he can pretend he's a director, and his wife can pretend she's an actress. Star Citizen proper may have been his cash cow, but he never really did know how to build it. So he put together a huge team and basically expected them to, but even that was hosed up by his constant meddling and persistent belief that he's a visionary. Other than that meddling, he's done absolutely jack and poo poo to help move the PTU along, aside from his ludicrous "10 For the Chairman" videos. His entire heart and soul has been in his little movie, and the faithful footed the bill. He's justifying this betrayal with the narrative that the income from Squadron 42 will keep the development limping along long enough to fund more PTU development. This is ridiculous on the face of it, since nobody really cares about SQ42, and they never have. Even those who did care, are already getting the first part for free. Yet he's deluded himself into believing that his personal project will somehow enter the mainstream and redefine gaming, and bail him out financially. There is an additional part to this. Since Chris has abandoned his backers in favor of SQ42 when the money got tight, and he has announced that SQ42 is going to be released in several parts, this raises an important question: what is his motivation to turn his attention to the PTU even if all his prophecies come to pass? Even if the funds were miraculously renewed, that does not change the reality that the PTU is doomed technically, but there's another aspect to this. So let's take it even further. Let's hand Chris all the cards: SQ42 releases, makes a shitload of money, and now has plentiful funds to move forward. What exactly do the backers think he'll move forward with? Star Citizen? Hardly. He's going to blow every goddamned cent on more mo-cap, more scripts, and more "I'm a director!" bullshit on his next chapter of SQ42. Meanwhile, he'll stall any token efforts to improve the PTU with his rampant autism. The facts are as Derek stated: Star Citizen has been abandoned, and the people leaving are the ones who are fed up that the entire direction and focus of this project has been changed. These were people who believed in the dream, and wanted to build the BDSSE. Now they're having to make a choice: stick around and help with SQ42, or run for the hills. The dream is dead. The nightmare is beginning.
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:18 |
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Ultimate irony would be that someone legit is desperately trying to feed Derek inside info but Derek has him on ignore. But given Eight Ace's predictions earlier combined with the all-in approach of Derek, sounds like something big is coming down the pipeline.
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:18 |
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Anything happen in the last 1000 pages? I have a job and family and can't read it all.
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:20 |
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D_Smart posted:Aha!so this time there is a thing you didn't see it coming.I think your powers are waning. My guess from page 2681 is one of the government people you had a meeting with has finally decided to take a look at CiG instead of giving you the you're-just-jealous runaround. edited well I hosed that quote up royally Haskell9 fucked around with this message at 02:37 on Mar 29, 2016 |
# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:21 |
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I Greyhound posted:Anything happen in the last 1000 pages? I have a job and family and can't read it all. Someone stole art but no one has been sued yet. CIG collapsed???? But hasn't yet. The last 1000 pages have been very good but we remain on the precipice.
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:21 |
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:22 |
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Scruffpuff posted:The thing is, Derek is right. It's not that the cash was running out to the point where people were going to stop getting paychecks - it ran down (several months ago) to the point where projections placed them running out before getting either Star Citizien or SQ42 done. The cash got to where Chris had to make a choice - Star Citizen, or Squadron 42. It's worse than that. If you can imagine that.
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:23 |
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If CIG knew what they were doing they would have had tools to generate planets and stars and asteroids all the way back in 2013. It's like if Rockstar environment artists focused on making rocks and plants and different types of grass and super advanced water shaders for GTA with a bunch of ultra-realistic cars, then don't even bother making any sort of spline-based road tool or building assets until the project is 1 year from "completion". Like, imagine being able to buy cars in advance for GTA6 for like hundreds of dollars, but being completely fine with Rockstar never showing any sort of roads to drive them on or pedestrians to mow down/thieve autos from.
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:23 |
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I think there's a way to pull the raw data? I don't know how far back it goes but if Solar Plebian ever has an ExciteBike race course I have a pretty good idea of a track map.
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:23 |
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Dusty Lens posted:I think there's a way to pull the raw data? I don't know how far back it goes but if Solar Plebian ever has an ExciteBike race course I have a pretty good idea of a track map. SC was at one point supposed to have buggy racing so it fits the whole "parody" theme... silvercatte buggy racing?
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:25 |
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Haskell9 posted:
I can neither confirm, nor deny that.
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:27 |
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D_Smart posted:It's worse than that. If you can imagine that. It may be, but it doesn't need to be. As the months go by, it's going to become progressively more obvious to the cultists that they've been taken advantage of. The 5 portions of the autism spectrum will combine to form Sperg Voltron, and they'll descend on CIG with fedoras and fury. That's all that has to happen to wipe out CIG. If there's more, I'd love to hear it.
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:27 |
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# ? Apr 29, 2024 04:16 |
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I Greyhound posted:Anything happen in the last 1000 pages? I have a job and family and can't read it all.
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 02:31 |