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Io_
Oct 15, 2012

woo woo



Pillbug

New thread needs more Gizmondo:



also:

Bootcha posted:

:eyepop:

Simon/Nicolas Elms

I WONDERED WHO THE gently caress THAT WAS

loving gently caress gently caress

WHAT THE poo poo gently caress IS loving GOING ON loving HERE

HOLY gently caress BALLS

loving gently caress gently caress

gently caress

:psyboom: :psypop:

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Io_
Oct 15, 2012

woo woo



Pillbug

Bleremiah posted:

How is Broken Age anyhow?

OK? If you're into adventure games then grab it in a sale otherwise I wouldn't bother.

The first half is reasonably satisfying. It has modern Tim Schafer writing (i.e. more introspection and "deep thoughts", less humor), moves at a decent pace with a decent story build-up and ends with a genuinely good cliff hanger. The puzzles are however busy work rather than challenge.

In the second half the writing takes a dive, the puzzles get obtuse in the worse adventure game kind of way and the story in the game abruptly ends with what is essentially a "lolz sorry! We ran out of money!" and then sort of stumbles to a limp and unsatisfying conclusion in the credits sequence.

Summary: Even with the huge delay and two parts it feels like the first 2 acts of a 3 act game, with the second act being rushed and not as well thought out. Then the credits sequence happens which feels like it should have followed a third act which never got made.

Io_ fucked around with this message at 11:20 on Oct 26, 2015

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

woo woo



Pillbug

Star Citizen: Shave Yourself

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

woo woo



Pillbug

SneakyFrog posted:

should be a lazer razor. :catbert:



What the balls is a lazer razor :stare:

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

SneakyFrog posted:

its like star citizen

So in reality it's a broken chopstick with a sharpened penny ineffectively taped to it?

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

You get REC points awarded for services performed to Croberts' hoop.

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

Everything is under control. No need for concern.

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

SelenicMartian posted:

Perfect!

But add the face to the hairy mikes too.

Sandi is unhappy with the hairy mikes...

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

Dunite posted:

It seems like Redditors impression of goons more correctly reprents their own actions than it does that of SA forum members.

Does that mean Reddit is better at being Goony than goons are?

Can you really describe it as "better" if it's a result of Savant Syndrome?

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

woo woo



Pillbug

Star Citizen: Return of the Stepford Fans

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

MeLKoR posted:

I've been a consumer of "gaming journalism" since the days of the ZX Spectrum and it was always "bribed opinion".

Amiga Power is and always will be the best gaming journalism to have existed, they really just did not give a gently caress.

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

woo woo



Pillbug

On wheelchairgate:

Being in a wheelchair doesn't excuse you from the consequences of being a dumbshit. However it's also one of those handle it quietly with the parents because discretion is the better part of valor moments.

It is however still funny as gently caress and I have no sympathy.

Beer4TheBeerGod posted:

Given how horrible Sandi is when speaking directly to staff imagine what she says about Wulf behind his back.

I guess that depends whether or not the Wulge is a smoothie.

Io_ fucked around with this message at 12:43 on Oct 28, 2015

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

woo woo



Pillbug

Truga posted:

Orbital mechanics. Can't have that in a space game.

also momentum.

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

Unfunny Poster posted:

I like how these people are even threatened by the mere existence of Photoshops on a comedy website and somehow blame Derek Smart for it.

Well when your whole life is jpegs...

:gary: PAAAAARRRRRRRRRRP!

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

MeLKoR posted:

quote:

SemiGaseousSnake 3 pontos 27 minutes ago*
Well that's reassuring that they're able to do this given that sections of the game are indeed getting completed. As milestones are met teams usually get leaner and leaner. While CIG is by no means getting lean, this is a healthy and perfectly normal thing in the industry.
Edit: typing on phone words bad no talk good bad talk do

Shart Citizen: Now 5S Compliant.

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

DoctorStrangelove posted:

In case you don't realize this Derek, it costs him :10bux: to change your avatar but only costs you :5bux: to change it back.

It's like making money! :gary:

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

woo woo



Pillbug

Yeah, I'm going with 2.0 being a hot mess of half-implemented fever dreams and megajank. They desperately need to squeeze something out their fetid pipe for the backers to roll around in to keep the hype train/jpeg sales going.

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

Hopper posted:

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Games > Star Citizen: I would rather believe in Santa Claus

Can we make this the December thread title please?

At least Santa Clause brings you cool poo poo (or socks (plaid socks are also a better gift than a jspeg)) and only charges milk + cookies.

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

Gwaihir posted:

This is the really salient point. Which engine they picked doesn't help anything when Chris decides that the boots on the marine character model are not up to his exacting standards, or that the Constellation needs to be re-designed for the 5th time.

And they have been solving technical issues with cryengine, but again that doesn't magically make a fun game or make their design choices not be steaming piles of dogshit.

Or telling a programmer to drop everything to write a fluid simulation for a drinks mixing mini-game.

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

Beet Wagon posted:

Also, is 10:30 in the morning too early for a burrito?

It is never too early for a Burrito.

Wish they sold Burritos where I live unfortunately tex-mex is considered "dangerously exotic" here. :saddowns:

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

Crobbits is going to sell you a jpeg of a stick.

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

MeLKoR posted:

How many do you need? I'm sure they can sell you a few concepts if you need something that isn't on the list.

Concepts are too much effort just stick up a big ole "?" in a fancy font.

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

You can gets good idea of their development priorities from that video and it's not making a video game.

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

Agrajag posted:

my eye opening moment was back in school when I trusted the fucker who sold Spore.

Rise of the Robots. Now that was a very shiny turd.

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

The Kins posted:

I read a making-of about that game a few years ago. If I remember it correctly, it was a small, inexperienced team behind it... but one of them knew 3D Studio MAX and the publisher decided to basically pin vast amounts of marketing expense upon it purely for that reason.

That was also a nice "lessons learnt" for kid me regarding the gaming press. So many articles in magazines hyping that game up as The Game Which Will Redefine The Industry.

Coincidentally Start Citizen will also redefine the industry and has a bunch of people who are good with 3DS Max.

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

Beer4TheBeerGod posted:

This sounds hilarious. What kind of beer would it be?

The obvious choice would be a bitter ale... maybe call it riggwelter which is yorkshire for a "sheep stuck on it's back".

A pretty apt description of the Shitizens.

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

An Enron type scandal with shell companies siphoning money all over the place / hiding losses and numerous other financial malfeasance would neither shock nor surprise me at this point in time. I also predict that the games press will be woefully under equipped to deal with it because they mostly have the business reporting skills of a stunned hedgehog and will run spend most of their energy running around asking 'how could this happen?' and stating the obvious.

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

CrazyTolradi posted:

At this point, as some have said so well, they want Space Second Life. They want to be able to ply the spaceways with their strange blowup doll cargo and indulge in weird sexual fantasies with their crews.

I think they want to engage in weird sexual fantasies with their ships, which is why so many of them have a multi-purpose hose attachment.

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

woo woo



Pillbug

Or they have some really spiffy gear but Crobber fired everyone who knew how to use it.

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

They needed the awesome physics so they could sell a working space toaster for many spacebucks.

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

The mocap space sex dungeon needs a tower of power in the corner, would really finish off the look.

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

ShredsYouSay posted:

Does anyone still like the original Deus Ex? :corsair:

Original Deus Ex was fantastic. 2000 was a good year for video games: Icewind Dale, BG2, Red Alert 2, Quake 3, Soldier of Fortune.

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

woo woo



Pillbug

It's like poetry. It rhymes.

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

toanoradian posted:

I wonder how bad a game this thread will compare Star Citizen to until we reach the point of "Actually, Star Citizen is better."

Big Rigs Over the Road Racing.

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

woo woo



Pillbug

DoctorStrangelove posted:

I still can't completely get over how lovely a callsign "Old Man" is.

Maybe it's the same deal as the POTATO, it was meant to be a placeholder and Crobbits just forgot to take it out and by the time he realized it was too late.

Jobbo_Fett posted:

Is CR so creatively bankrupt that he literally took Col. Blair or whatever his name is, aged him 20 years and gave him a lovely nickname?

I played through, and for the most part enjoyed, the Wing Commander games as a kid and the story was never the attraction. They played OK and looked cool and when you're 12 looking cool goes a long way.

Christ, the main enemy were the Kilrathi who liked to Kill and were full of wrath. They also, as I found out a few years later, were pretty much a copy/paste of the Kzin from Larry Niven's Ringworld.

Most of the stuff in Wing Commander was just Crobbed from previous fictional works, largely unchanged and what spin he put on it was to the original source materials detriment.

Io_ fucked around with this message at 09:18 on Dec 7, 2015

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

woo woo



Pillbug

So moving the slider back and forth would simulate the rape? Would this be like another minigame?

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

woo woo



Pillbug

Then it's going to be pretty amusing seeing what else gets "forgotten". Sorry! We forgot this freighter thingy should have a cargo door at the back! Our bad!

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

Wise Learned Man posted:

And what about the whole Command & Control module thingie for capital ships? At one point Croberts was promising RTS-style command of a fleet from an idris or bigger. I haven't heard anybody even ask about that poo poo in ages.

The command and control module will be a clone of Missile Command, the bonus feature will be that it has a 1:5 chance of causing your ships computer to CTD.

Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

Tank Boy Ken posted:

They've asked the "community" to post reference pics for 2 new ships. I mean if your job is to: "Make it like this, with a bit of that, but make it more ... hmf .... ahhh... VISIONARY", it's going to show. Though you'll certainly be also able to find similar design to those found in Elite Dangerous.

Crobbles hand waving while he says this is also a critical part of the design process and communicates key information non-verbally.

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Io_
Oct 15, 2012

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Pillbug

Slime Bro Helpdesk posted:

As a Project Manager my ears always perk up when someone reports they're "doing a big push"

At CIG hearing that from Shitloaf just means you shouldn't go near the lavatory for a while.

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