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Chri--Christ Roberts did 9/11? 
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Oct 28, 2015 20:40
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peter gabriel posted:I am now a personal trainer full time so if anyone needs any tips just ask How do I work on my glutes while shaving my pubes and scamming nerds out of their welfare checks?
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Nov 3, 2015 03:15
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Meanwhile in a game that's actually a game: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0jE7UhIyRnA
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Nov 7, 2015 01:56
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So the thing that really sticks out to me in all these videos is how "floaty" the ship movement looks. It honest seems like the ship isn't so much moving through space as it is space moving around the ship, which feels weird somehow. In my mind I know that that's how Wing Commander and TIE Fighter did it, but that was loving 20 years ago. Freespace had a better flight model. Elite may not be 100% perfect, but one of the things that Frontier nailed was the feeling of WEIGHT behind this slab of metal that is moving at crazy speed through space. I can't quite place why, but I don't get that feeling with SC. It's like the world outside the cockpit is what's moving, not the ship itself. Like you're skating on ice rather than flying a ship. Maybe the flight model is just early, or maybe Christ Roberts is literally space hitler. I don't know anymore, man.
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Dec 17, 2015 03:37
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Mirificus posted:
Meanwhile, E:D is a game that is released, functional, playable, successful, and is being developed by a company that is actually interested in making a GAME rather than A loving MO-CAP MOVIE.
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Dec 17, 2015 05:41
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fuctifino posted:He has the class and style that Sandi so desperately craves: Ah yes, Sandi has to make sure she gets a picture with her requisite black friend in order to prove that she is NotRacist (tm)
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Dec 19, 2015 18:25
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I like to imagine that St. Christ of Roberts is going to see Star Wars this weekend only to run back to his backer-bought mansion, do 200 lines of coke off the asses off six overpriced whores, and then rewrite the entire script for his mo-cap movie because he saw something done by a competent filmmaker and got sad. Then Sandi will fire someone (while she is on vacation in Tahiti or something) for being unshaven. And that is Star Citizen.
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Dec 19, 2015 19:02
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Verus posted:That's only for indirect speech. Dat Latin tho  Meanwhile, if Christ Roberts is hiring... I have exactly 0 skills relevant to game design, I have never worked on a game, and I don't even like video games... so I am approximately twenty thousand million percent qualified to work on Star Shitizen. Let Sandi know that the boys are shaved. I'm even a completely unoffensive shade of white. I expect no less than 80,000/year. I'm low balling this because I want to watch this poo poo go up in flames from a front row seat. Call me, CIG. Call me.
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Dec 20, 2015 20:02
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Pgabz for president of Internet posting, 2016.
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Dec 21, 2015 10:30
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alphabettitouretti posted:Well he wasn't wrong was he?? This. I find it difficult to comprehend the levels of head-up-rear end required to think like this dude does. Sure, ok, maybe Elite isn't his cup of tea, that's fine. Talking up SC as a "working prototype" versus AN ACTUAL, PLAYABLE, RELEASED GAME is an entirely different tier of willful ignorance. Elite ain't perfect, but it's still a game that is an actual game (not a buggy, barely playable mess of a tech demo) that's being developed by a team of competent professionals with realistic goals and experienced management. I mean, how does the brown sea look at St. Christ of Roberts not only failing to play his own loving game, but failing to UNDERSTAND his own loving game and think "yeah, I am confident that this project is lead by someone who knows what they're doing and totally is not using all this free money to make a lovely mo-cap movie because his lovely live action movie was awful and bombed right alongside his career in film. I shall buy seventeen Idrises now." I mean, he has absolutely no loving interest in the progress of his own loving game. None. He spent the entirety of citcon jerking off over his script and atrocious mo-cap. He trotted out Gary loving Oldman. He can't even figure out how to run the game, which is what he was handed 100 million loving dollars to do... and people still look at him as if he's competent? Clearly not a cult.
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Dec 21, 2015 19:22
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Tippis posted:Why does his mouth move like it was a Jim Henson puppet? C'mon Chris — I know there are other muscles in the face than the ones that cause the jaw to flap up and down. Please use them. This explains so much about the lovely mo-cap.
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Dec 22, 2015 04:46
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Star Citizen: It's basically Scientology for nerds.
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Dec 23, 2015 18:44
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My favorite part about the cultists witch-hunting Elite is that they're doing it because Elite is a playable, actually released game that isn't a buggy mess like Christ Roberts' crown jewel. So they're obviously paying attention, but then the cognitive dissonance kicks in and they go full crazy. There's no actual reason for them to go after Elite other than pure spite for Frontier having the audacity to develop their game in a competent, professional manner, as opposed to banking entirely on whales as Chris blows all the money on a lovely mo-cap movie to stick it to the Hollywood man while letting his wife pretend that she's an actress. On some level, they clearly understand that they're being played, yet they're so far gone that they're advocating FOR the con, rather than AGAINST it. They're just too far gone, man. 
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Dec 23, 2015 23:43
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Nation posted:drink everytime you cringe He said he wanted to do the challenge, not loving DIE. Jesus, bro. Gosh.
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Dec 27, 2015 00:36
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AP posted:They've already said they want esports a couple of times. I can see it now. Inane commentators talking about the subtleties of exploiting EVA physics to get into the captain's chair of the biggest ship available before anyone else. Truly a riveting experience for the audience.
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Dec 28, 2015 01:55
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Decrepus posted:How far into the campaign does Gary Oldmans die and Sandi's character takes over. He doesn't even finish the speech. He has a heart attack and Sandi steps in and "acts".
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Dec 28, 2015 02:19
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MeLKoR posted:In that case the UEE is completely hosed. But wasn't the UEE supposed to be Space Rome and the Vanduul the Space Vandals? How come the space barbarians are so far ahead technologically? And do they place those fake thrusters on their ships for nostalgia's sake? Why do their space magic ships still handle like rear end? Because cocaine.
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Dec 28, 2015 19:56
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Chin posted:... but why the jank? Because this is all basically a mod for Crysis, and a lovely one, at that.
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Dec 29, 2015 02:59
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Holy poo poo these are beautiful: 
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Dec 29, 2015 06:41
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Five years after this poo poo storm crashes and burns, Lord St. Christ of Roberts will write a book: "I pissed away 100 million on my stupid pipe dream, and you can too!" It will sell 600,000 copies in the first week... to one Ben Lesnick.
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Dec 31, 2015 05:00
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Dr. Derek D. Smart, the hero we needed. This is brilliant. Sandi, I know you're reading this, and you need help. Serious, professional help.
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Jan 6, 2016 03:45
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Lowtax posted:You're pregnant?!? AND SANDI IS THE FATHER! 
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Jan 6, 2016 03:54
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Winner.
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Jan 6, 2016 06:43
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the PAAAAAAAAAAAARP is strong with this one So does Sandi have an account here or is she just a pubbie that doesn't want to pay her  dues to Lowtax?
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Jan 6, 2016 10:03
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This is the kind of person who would otherwise be storming vacant government buildings in the Oregon wilderness if not for Christ Roberts distracting him with spaceship JPEGs. Well done, Chris, you've done something mildly constructive.
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Jan 6, 2016 23:12
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Khanstant posted:Lazy and messy as gently caress but you get the idea: 
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Jan 7, 2016 16:50
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 Pgabz soundtracks are the best
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Jan 9, 2016 04:15
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I don't know what's better: horrible tales from the brown sea, the latest Dr. Smart mic drop, Chris still looking like a loving thumb with eyes, the constant supply of gifs from heaven, Ben being Ben, or Sandi's desperate self-aggrandizement parade. So good. Best thread.
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Jan 9, 2016 19:58
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In the grim darkness of the 'verse, there is only shitposting... and JPEGs. Always JPEGs.
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Jan 10, 2016 01:17
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Well, I mean, this is a guy who spent 20 grand on jpegs while simultaneously pming dick pics to every single person without a Y chromosome that he could find. He's consistently dumb.
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Jan 10, 2016 02:50
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Hillary Clintons Thong posted:I had fun making it thats all that matters Apocalypse as Derek... holy poo poo... oh my god so good.
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Jan 10, 2016 04:48
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Dear Lord St. Christ of Roberts, Can you please put mirrors in your shitshow of a game? It's one crucial feature for immersion so that I can watch my space person jack off in space without having to look down. Thank you, please take this money to buy more cocaine and whores. Sincerely, The Brown Sea
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Jan 10, 2016 22:12
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lilspooky posted:Something that cracked me up was that in the most recent 104TCM one of the first (maybe even THE first) question that the Dread Pirate Croberts answered was one in which somebody asked if there would be micro-transactions for the current lovely PTU so shitizens could color their ships / clothes / icons etc. Out of all the questions in that segment that was the only one where he got really enthusiastic and expressed that not only was it planned but it was coming very soon. Gotta milk that money as long as they can! How many thousands do you think the Wulge will drop if he can just copy|paste his dick pics onto his ship so that the maximum number of star citizen women can see his taint?
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Jan 11, 2016 03:09
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SQ42 prediction: It will get released solely so that Sandi can use it to pad her CV.
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Jan 11, 2016 05:31
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Incombibulator posted:
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Jan 11, 2016 08:38
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Star Citizen: Or I how I learned to shut up and love the PAAAAAAAAAAAAARP
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Jan 11, 2016 21:11
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Beer4TheBeerGod posted:Not only is it a core promise from Kickstarter, but they emphasized the feature after Elite dropped it. Now the community manager just said they won't even think about it until after going live. And nobody is calling them out for it. You even have assholes saying they don't even want private servers. My favorite part about this is that, when Elite was getting poo poo on for removing local play (and, to be honest, SOME of that was legitimate if it was coming from people with spotty internet), the brown sea was crowing about how SC was going to have private servers and thus was the superior game/vision/experience, etc. Yet now that their lord and savior has betrayed them, they simply choose to ignore it in favor of buying more JPEGs. Pretty much just nuke the loving brown sea from orbit. It's the best possible way this can end.
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Jan 11, 2016 23:18
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Chris still thinks he's a loving amazing director and SQ42 is his big middle finger to Hollywood. As soon as the millions started rolling in his eyes lit up and he knew what had to be done. The rest of SC is there to justify the pile of paper he so lovingly trotted out before the brown sea at citcon. The success of CIG's crowd funding has been a cruel irony for him. It let him go back to his bad habits of ballooning "vision" and similarly swollen expectations that he will inevitably be unable to deliver. Now his real passion project, the one thing he really cared about, is likely going to be shoved out the door solely to cover their asses... if he can be hosed to be mildly realistic for five seconds. It's almost tragic. But then there's Sandi. Also:
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Jan 12, 2016 09:04
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alf_pogs posted:SO IS THE STIMPIRE I'm sorry, where did you find such a candid picture of Christ Roberts and his wife.
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Jan 13, 2016 06:29
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| # ¿ Mar 15, 2025 17:41 |
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Jimb posted:I had a stint where I thought I wanted to play 40k but it turns out I'm just really into the setting and I don't like Games Workshop or their games. I wish that the IP was owned by anyone else so that it could be used in a more open way. 40k is where Blizzard first got their giant shoulderpads fetish... and warcraft... and most everything else they've done. Metzen even looks like the stereotypical Warhams who is old enough that he should know better.
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Jan 13, 2016 08:55
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