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We Know Catheters posted:There's nothing wrong with BDSM, you silly people quote:This week daddy and I explored more of our relationship which is something I am really enjoying. Daddy gave me an enema and double diapered me and put on a locking diaper cover. Having the water in me and knowing what was coming was scary but the way daddy stood behind me and talked in my ear made me feel so safe and calm. Daddy put a timer on and gave me ways to get out of it which I was desperate for but being honest I wanted the lose of control I crave it even though it scares me I want daddy to over power me to have full control. Daddy led me to the lounge but I was nervous to sit down so I went to my kitty bed and within a few minutes I couldn't hold back and had an accident so daddy took me outside to walk around for a bit which caused me to have bigger accident which caused me to blush and get tears of embarrassment and all I wanted was to hold onto daddy so we went back inside. When we got in daddy sat on the couch and I sat in my kitty bed and held onto daddy for comfort and protection as I was messing. Daddy talked to me and told me how little I am and how I have no control and how he would always protect me and look after me and I felt so small and volurnable which I haven't felt before but was the most amazing feeling to have someone I trust someone I would give my life for and someone who in my own little way I love see me in such a way that I never knew I could be that I didn't know I needed or craved was an amazing experience that I will always treasure. Holding daddy close and having him talk to me as I messed made my head go fuzzy like we were the only people in the world like nothing else mattered all my fears were flushed away. During our time together we also spent time out together exploring new places and daddy cooked amazing food for us. Seeing daddy do something he loves and brings him joy makes me the happiest to see his face light up just makes me melt and want to make him feel like that all the time I can't imagine life without him he has my heart. During our time I also had some accidents which turned into punishments one was a spanking and another enema while role playing as a school girl which I have never roleplayed but through it daddy reminded me it isn't real that it is play so that helped me lots. Another punishment was daddy figging me which stung and I was tempted to hide the ginger from him but I didn't. During the punishment daddy reminded me I have safe words which made me happy that he cared how I was feeling he also spanked me which made me hurt more but I held onto daddy and gave him eye contact as I was crying and he made me feel better after he took it out he did amazing after care and held me as I cried in his arms. Between everything we did I got a butt plug in and I was happy to get to make daddy cum and played with the vibrator all up it was an amazing time and I want to do so much more.
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Jan 15, 2018 04:45
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| # ¿ Apr 25, 2024 20:01 |
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Mycroft Holmes posted:"The way you achieve orgasm with a consenting partner is weird" I said, as I placed my blood-engorged flesh tube inside the mucus cavern of my partner. "I find it strange and disgusting" I said, as the organ adjacent to my lower intestines produced white goo that would be flung into the fleshy sack in my partners abdomen, where it would forcibly penetrate her cells and generate a benign tumor that would one day be expelled from her body. If you want to suck a toe, suck a toe, whatever, but if you need to pretend your sex partner is a toddler in order to sling yoghurt then maybe cut your dick off idk.
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Jan 15, 2018 05:20
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My shame at getting it is fighting my delight at getting it and winning.
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Jan 23, 2018 12:24
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What a cat-astrophe!
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Mar 26, 2018 00:00
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Rad-daddio posted:I think Harry Potter messed up just as many kids as Sonic the Hedgehog did. Zil posted:Gotta go cast.
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May 2, 2018 22:09
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SPERMCUBE.ORG posted:I never got that far in Paperboy.
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Jun 14, 2018 13:27
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These sure are some funny quotes.
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Jun 24, 2018 15:17
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Does anybody have the movie pitch idea about the stoners in the Vatican?
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Jun 29, 2018 23:44
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Thanks, toxicfrog!
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Jul 1, 2018 02:41
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Lobok posted:Ok, so I've invited you all here for sex. All according to bukkake.*
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Aug 10, 2018 00:10
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Both barrels.
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Sep 20, 2018 07:17
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WITCHCRAFT posted:Excalibur, much like Disney's Alladin, is best viewed from a well worn and heavily degraded VHS tape. Lobok posted:I did watch Excalibur on an old VHS tape but I never understood the ending. Arthur goes into final battle against Mordred and then all of a sudden the movie becomes footage of my uncle's second wedding. Does it end with your Aunt being heavily degraded on the VHS tape?
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Oct 11, 2018 22:03
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Lobok posted:She drank a LOT that night. 
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Oct 11, 2018 23:15
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Karate Bastard posted:Wolololo Malachite_Dragon posted:I hate that clever, clever joke.
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Dec 13, 2018 23:14
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Slippery posted:something awful: a place for learning I learned the limits of what it is possible for a man to do to his anus here. It's the kind of lesson that stays with you.
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Jan 5, 2019 23:48
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Bertrand Hustle posted:In what world do historians need guns One in which history is written by the victor, Duh.
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Feb 13, 2019 23:12
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Australian politics was great when Paul Keating was Prime Minister and in full swing. He once, when asked by the leader of the opposition why (if he was so sure of his chances) he didn't call an election replied "Because I want to do you slowly". https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RU2RMz5g9ho
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Apr 30, 2019 12:25
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Ghost Leviathan posted:This is a hell of a game of guess the thread Didn't guess the thread, but knew exactly who it was in response to.
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Jun 21, 2019 09:05
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Does anyone have handy that quote regarding what different types of primates would do when a screwdriver gets misplaced in their enclosure?
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Jan 4, 2020 13:07
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Sagebrush’s paraphrase, take your pick. [/quote] Awesome, thanks. 🙂
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Jan 5, 2020 08:34
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Where's Poochie?
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Feb 4, 2020 21:03
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Platystemon posted:So you all didn’t recognise the joke till it was too late. Why are you like this?
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May 21, 2020 03:26
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It's over a decade old and it's definitely a "laughing at" rather than "laughing with" quote, but...Dipes posted:The book has absolutely nothing to do with facism. The book is about the greek ideals of the republic, how virtue strengthens the republic, how the republic can strengthen virtue, etc. Just look at it. Just look at those two sentences in immediate juxtaposition.
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Jul 12, 2020 16:00
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Splicer posted:An entire life of just having gotten out of the shower A city where there are two seasons: "your washing is dry before you finish hanging it up" and "all fabric in your house is mouldy".
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Sep 3, 2020 11:37
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Dameius posted:I always hear the Hakuna Matata parody in my head whenever someone brings up vagina dentata. It's a penis-free.... Girl cavity... Vagina dentata!
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Mar 3, 2021 03:09
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Snowy posted:I still don’t get where the radical feminist part of terf comes from, they don’t seem especially rad or feminist It comes from the same place as the "democratic" and the "people's republic" does in DPRK. Out of a butthole.
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May 8, 2021 15:15
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A HORNY SWEARENGEN posted:It's right there. Another bloody map the omits the glorious boot of the Principality of Taswegia.
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Jul 1, 2021 03:12
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EorayMel posted:No. Ugh, the number of people in the thread with the hot take of "call immigration and deport that illegal whore before she anchor babies you" is truly repulsive.
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Oct 14, 2021 23:18
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Milo and POTUS posted:What year was it '07
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Oct 15, 2021 06:23
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Can't quote it directly or attribute it because I only briefly saw it in a Facebook post and I can't trawl the entire fast moving thread on my phone, but: "RIP lowtax, if only you married your alcoholism you might've beaten it."
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Nov 11, 2021 22:49
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Gravitas Shortfall posted:Immigrant cuisine is super interesting but also gets weird when you start trying to fit it into neat little cultural boxes because you get a lot of dishes that are in the style of traditional food but altered to either fit the majority culture's palate (or perceived palate), or modified to use different ingredients because the usual ones aren't available, or actually a version of a regional dish but done in their culture's style. People who insist on sharp borders and purity of essence in food strike me as having the same kind of brainworms as the weirdos who insist on keeping languages static and unchanging without understanding what a complete bastard polyglot fuckpile of different regional tongues basically every single language already is. Like, people who unironically want to keep Italian cooking traditional and pure without considering that it would involve a shitload of Garum and no loving tomatoes because those are a recent import, and who would essentially be writing off a vast chunk of Vietnamese food. My grandmother came to Australia with Oregano seeds sewn into the hem of her dress for want of any growing here, and had to go to the pharmacy to buy Olive Oil with which to make her disgusting foreign muck, and nowadays there's an entire shelf in the supermarket for 20 different varieties of pasta noodle.
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Feb 10, 2022 21:30
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That being said Dizzy 4: voyage to the paedoph-isles was a polarising game even in England. The nautical theme and minigame in which you spread cultural hegemony was universally praised for its deep mechanics, with the ability to use phrenology to determine optimal servitude assignments also receiving praise for being an accurate depiction of period appropriate scientific understanding, but there was a mixed reaction to the Gary Glitter final boss because while yes, you were beating the poo poo out of Gary Glitter, you were doing to to gain access to his massive store of children stolen from the sets of BBC light entertainment programs, and the subsequent cinematic ending sequence was regarded as being an inappropriate fit for the ZX Spectrum's processing capabilities, as well as being in enormously poor taste.
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Feb 14, 2022 02:48
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Even his name, "Dizzy", is revealed in his penultimate adventure to be a reference to his propensity to use rohypnol as a precursor to committing sexual assault.
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Feb 14, 2022 03:01
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Karate Bastard posted:Making ahooga faces from all the cum in my nose. Now I'm imagining all of those awful anime horny faces having accompanying horny Tex Avery sound effects and their curse is lifted.
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Feb 20, 2022 23:02
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Chamale posted:
I was not prepared for this level of psychic damage on a Monday morning.
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Feb 21, 2022 00:52
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cock hero flux posted:the penguin in question, the great auk(technically not a penguin but it looked pretty much exactly like one), ended up going extinct purely by virtue of being too useful I hope you grow tastebuds in your butthole.
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Feb 21, 2022 07:35
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Robobot posted:There’s so much delicious vegan food that isn’t pretending to be meat that I just don’t understand the point besides “I miss this meat thing”. Which is fine, but it’s kinda like wearing shoes that look like leather. You’re just perpetuating the use of leather in fashion. Yeah, while I eat meat I'm completely fine with eating Vegan meals, whatever, but the second there's that ultra-processed meat substitute poo poo in something I'm basically not interested. Like, don't try to even pretend that Vegan "Cheese" isn't just a stodgy substrate made of hate and sadness. The worst pizza I ever had was at a pizzeria that I decided to try on a whim and which I didn't notice at first glance was actually a vegan pizzeria. Like, nothing in the google entry said anything about it being vegan and all of the menu items just had the normal name of the pizza, y'know, Ham & Cheese, Pepperoni, Supreme etc. It was even divided into "Meat Pizzas" and "Veggie Pizzas" sections, so it looked like a regular pizzeria with vegetarian options. The only clue to it that I could have possibly noticed before I ordered was a tiny bit of 6-point text right down the bottom of the menu, sandwiched between the disclaimer about possible gluten cross-contamination and the request to inform about allergies. It had a little old Italian couple and what I assume was their son working there. They didn't have a Marinara i.e. an actual cheese-free pizza option that I would have happily eaten, but what they did have was a Margherita topped with the saddest yellow substance that covered the top of the pizza in a thin web of dry, crumbly foulness that had desiccated rather than melted. There are a million ways to make a tasty pizza without dairy products which I would have happily enjoyed, but thanks to the overwhelming trend of providing lovely direct substitutes for nonvegan ingredients there was literally nothing on the menu that would have been palatable - they literally had no pizzas in their Vego section without cheese, just pizzas with cheese substitutes. I just checked and the joint has pivoted to primarily making burgers now, so the broader customer base likely agreed with me about how bad it was. The nutrition information on fake meats is also frankly alarming too. I don't eat mushrooms due to allergies, but even then a Vegan burger with a well-grilled massive mushroom cap on it looks far more appetizing than something with that sad fake meat on it, and seems healthier as well.
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Feb 23, 2022 23:25
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My favourite probe was for posting a photo consisting of a pedometer with 0001 displaying on it up held up in front of someone's (quite suspect) post. That person shortly got banned for continuing to make comments that could be generously described as betraying a poor attitude towards the concept of age of consent. SMH if you don't have at least a single 6er that you can display as a badge of pride.
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Feb 24, 2022 22:47
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Hulk Hogan wheat shoes.
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Feb 26, 2022 07:42
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| # ¿ Apr 25, 2024 20:01 |
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Rockman Reserve posted:do...do you think americans masturbate to our plague of random violence? He was obviously being hyperbolic, but y'all do have poo poo like Sandy Hook truthers who would rather harass the parents of dead children than examine their preconceptions surrounding the availability of firearms in a country where there's a school shooting once every 10 days or so on average. Edit: and that's post COVID where remote schooling was a factor. 2019 had an average of a shooting a week. 
Breetai has a new favorite as of 04:12 on Apr 28, 2022 |
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Apr 28, 2022 04:10
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