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May 23, 2009

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Say Nothing posted:

Many people think Lincoln had Marfan's Syndrome due to his height and long-limbed appearance.

http://www.redorbit.com/news/general/1354040/was_lincoln_already_dying_when_he_got_shot/

I have Marfan's and dude is was just a tall lanky cat

people with Marfan's have a certain facial structure to them

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verbal enema
May 23, 2009

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Jews and Spanish Muslims had a good relationship often times employing Jews as mercenaries or bodyguards

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May 23, 2009

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wait wait wait.

Eunuchs had it all lopped off??

drat news to me

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May 23, 2009

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Just chop a dick and balls off you know some major bloodworks

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May 23, 2009

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Gabriel Pope posted:

There's also El Cid, hero of Spain's great chivalric epic The Lay of the Cid, a poem extolling the loyalty and virtue of El Cid as a great Christian hero. Even when he is unjustly treated by his king, El Cid's faith and trust in his liege never wavers. When El Cid is exiled on false charges, he still continues to fight on behalf of his liege against the Moors, eventually regaining his honor and titles through his stalwart defense of Christiandom. He sets the perfect example of an honorable Christian warrior, loyal to king and God unto death.

The good news is that El Cid is definitely an actual historical figure who did indeed fight in the Reconquista... on the Muslim side. Whoops! After being told to gently caress off by his Christian lord, the historical El Cid turned around and hired himself out as a mercenary to the Muslims, who much admired him for his many successes against the Christians. Even the honorific title the Spanish gave him is adapted from the one the Moors gave him: al Sayyid.

El Cid isn't the only chivalric hero who got a good dose of whitewashing. Over the border in France, the big epic chivalric poem is the Song of Roland, who soloed thousands of Muslims in a desperate rearguard action to protect Charlemagne's army as it retreated through the Pyrenees. At least Roland was fighting on the right side; however, there weren't any Muslims in the Pyrenees at the time. Charlemagne got bushwacked by Basques, who were really touchy about their territory and despite their Christianity weren't very happy about giant Frankish armies tromping around on their turf.

brb playing the best Age of Kings campaign again

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May 23, 2009

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New Suns Over Germany is a really good name for a band

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May 23, 2009

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What if he said I cannot tell a truth?

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May 23, 2009

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Wouldn't there be like absurd amounts of materials left over from some huge ancient hyper war?

I love the concept of continent spanning empires but goddamn come on guys it just didn't happen like that

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May 23, 2009

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System Metternich posted:

The hyper war timeline is a joke building on that infamous image :ssh:

No I get that it's just I'm confused that people do think there were these immense empires well OK I'm not but damnit Korea you did not

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May 23, 2009

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canyoneer posted:

Julius Caesar as a young noble was once captured by Cilician pirates, and held for ransom, as was the custom at the time. When they demanded 20 talents for him, he laughed at them and told them to ask for 50 talents instead. For 38 days he was their prisoner and buddy, hanging out with them, eating meals together, competing in games and athletic contests, and he'd go yell at them to pipe down if they were too loud when he wanted to go to sleep.
He'd write speeches and poems and read them to them, and he'd mock them for not understanding them or appreciating him. He also told them that once he was free, he'd raise some ships and come back and crucify them all.
:yarr:Har har! Our new buddy Caesar is such a jokester!

Then when he was ransomed and released, he raised some ships and soldiers immediately when he got back to Italy.
He sailed straight back, captured them all, and had them crucified.
:agesilaus:

That is good stuff never knew that.

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May 23, 2009

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I just enjoy him being a typical noble even when he has been captured and being ransomed.

HEY SHUT THE gently caress UP IM TRYNA SLEEP UP HEEAH

And then he did what nobles typically don't do and came back and murdered them all

Do we know that he got the same dudes or did he just Crucify some dudes and call it a day

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May 23, 2009

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I get why it happened but it is still p lame I had to scroll for like one full minute! On a phone! Wow!

gently caress the Patriots

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May 23, 2009

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war bad

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May 23, 2009

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bewbies posted:

(it still is)

well not shooting so much but malingering

What is malingering

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May 23, 2009

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Scale armor owns

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May 23, 2009

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Wheat Loaf posted:

Many records were lost during the Finno-Korean Hyperwar.

im still pissed I thought that was real

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May 23, 2009

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Nessus posted:

Was Baron Samedi consulted about this?

The Man With No Pants

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May 23, 2009

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Monkey Nuts

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May 23, 2009

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That was a cool as post thanks System Metternich

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May 23, 2009

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That's my dad and my mom you prick

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May 23, 2009

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Navies have been known to rub things

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May 23, 2009

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Alhazred posted:

You also Tarrare who would eat anything.

Jesus Christ

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May 23, 2009

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The Barkely Marathon movie is extremely good

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May 23, 2009

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Bobby Digital posted:

George Washington was twelve stories high.

Washington Washington
6 foot 8 weighed a loving ton

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May 23, 2009

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Bobby Digital posted:

George Washington was twelve stories high.

Ahhh my dude

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May 23, 2009

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Milo and POTUS posted:

I find myself singing this out loud like all the time now.

OPPONENTS BEWARE

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May 23, 2009

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Sweevo posted:

The French are way too proud of their very average cuisine.

this is a fact

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May 23, 2009

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Domus posted:

Wait, wait, back to the Berlin supplies. What in the world can you do with 19 live cattle? All the other items are for like a hundred thousand people, over a six month period. Was this so that for just one day, everyone could have fresh meat?

Cows were also targeted by the nazis

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May 23, 2009

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and boobies

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May 23, 2009

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CharlestheHammer posted:

If there is one thing you want in a siege, it’s something that spoils real quick.

Cows live for awhile man

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May 23, 2009

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Biplane posted:

cows are basically land sharks my dude. theyre smooth as hell and theyll die and rot if not in constant movement

Spin em around a bunch

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May 23, 2009

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Pick posted:

the cows were for berlin's zoophiles who would go crazy unable to travel to the countryside

Is this for real because I'm pretty dumb and this would be the best.

Ah. Grand cow. I feel comfort.

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May 23, 2009

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Ah poo poo

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May 23, 2009

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Imagine being those cows......really makes you think

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May 23, 2009

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But in an alternate reality there are 100s of hero dog statues everywhere so it kind of evens out

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May 23, 2009

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Jesus Christ

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May 23, 2009

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Ant mirror for Speckles

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May 23, 2009

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Old photos own

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May 23, 2009

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This day and age imo bring back the blunted axes

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May 23, 2009

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BravestOfTheLamps posted:

Godzilla is lame.

you suck

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