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Kavak
Aug 23, 2009


Emrikol posted:

The name of the tome - The Whispering Fez - is a much more credible name for an occult artifact.

It's still a piece of cloth headwear. Would it be any better if it was the Whispering Beret or Whispering Turban?

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That Old Tree
Jun 24, 2012

nah



I think it should be noted that this project arises from Eddy Webb's own undying love for his pugs. No matter how aggressively uninteresting the game is to me as a game, it's still just loving adorable.

Kurieg
Jul 19, 2012

RIP Lutri: 5/19/20-4/2/20
:blizz::gamefreak:
It's also probably worth noting that while I absolutely adore dogs, I am not a fan of pugs. I've known one pug in my lifetime and when it wasn't scared to death of me, it was hopping in my lap, then remembering that it was scared to death of me and pissing itself.

Also I do not like their noses, they're aggressively unhealthy and I cannot comprehend why people would view that as a desirable trait and try to make it worse.

Night10194
Feb 13, 2012

We'll start,
like many good things,
with a bear.
You'll be happy to know there are some breeders who are trying to make healthy, less inbred pugs who can live happily.

sexpig by night
Sep 8, 2011

by Azathoth
yea Pugmire isn't the most interesting game but it's not bad and a lot of its blandness is saved by it being a product literally born from someone loving their dumb ugly dog bros so much they wanted to make a game about dogs like them being heroes.

Monarchies of Mau is the cat version coming Soon(TM) that looks neat, cats are fittingly huge assholes.

Down With People
Oct 31, 2012

The child delights in violence.

sexpig by night posted:

Monarchies of Mau is the cat version coming Soon(TM) that looks neat, cats are fittingly huge assholes.

I didn't back it but I'm glad it's coming out. Probably the biggest weakness of Pugmire for me is that as soon as it mentioned Mau I immediately lost all interest in playing a bold and courageous dog versus a lovely cat.

Kurieg
Jul 19, 2012

RIP Lutri: 5/19/20-4/2/20
:blizz::gamefreak:
I've got the Monarchies of Mau early access copy, and I will be covering it. The short version is that the Monarchies are a confederation of Kingdoms that formed to unite against the Dogs in War, but not that the war is over some of them want to go it alone again, and others do not.

Also there are Cat Necromancers, and the "divine" casters don't believe in any gods but themselves, casting spells through strength of conviction and the sound of their own voice.

PantsOptional
Dec 27, 2012

All I wanna do is make you bounce

Kurieg posted:

Cat Necromancers

SOLD!

megane
Jun 20, 2008



Kavak posted:

It's still a piece of cloth headwear. Would it be any better if it was the Whispering Beret or Whispering Turban?
cast yourself into the mind-rending abyss of bespoke haberdashery

Kurieg
Jul 19, 2012

RIP Lutri: 5/19/20-4/2/20
:blizz::gamefreak:

megane posted:

cast yourself into the mind-rending abyss of bespoke haberdashery

Deerstalker yourself and Fez to Bearskin.

wiegieman
Apr 22, 2010

Royalty is a continuous cutting motion


Kurieg posted:

Cat Necromancers

Nekomancers, clearly.

I will not apologize for stealing from Monstress

Tuxedo Catfish
Mar 17, 2007

You've got guts! Come to my village, I'll buy you lunch.
a pun that bad/good deserves a better game than something derived from 5E

Bieeanshee
Aug 21, 2000

Not keen on keening.


Grimey Drawer

wiegieman posted:

Nekomancers, clearly.

I will not apologize for stealing from Monstress

Looks like something new is going on my pull list.

JcDent
May 13, 2013

Give me a rifle, one round, and point me at Berlin!

Kurieg posted:

Also there are Cat Necromancers, and the "divine" casters don't believe in any gods but themselves, casting spells through strength of conviction and the sound of their own voice.

My cat is definitely a believer in the power of meows.

Also, imagine kitty debates of what constitutes as being worthy of worship: do you lounge about like it is a given that your worthy, do you need to fight heretical mice to be worthy, etc.

KITTIES.

Kurieg
Jul 19, 2012

RIP Lutri: 5/19/20-4/2/20
:blizz::gamefreak:

Tuxedo Catfish posted:

a pun that bad/good deserves a better game than something derived from 5E

To be fair to Pugmire, they actually do try to fix a lot of 5e's issues, and succeed in some places. There's only one thing I really disagree with and thankfully it's quite easy to fix.

JcDent posted:

My cat is definitely a believer in the power of meows.

Also, imagine kitty debates of what constitutes as being worthy of worship: do you lounge about like it is a given that your worthy, do you need to fight heretical mice to be worthy, etc.

KITTIES.

quote:

Always Trust Your Instincts
Cats were worshipped by the Old Ones, because cats acted in ways that were worthy of worship. While this argument seems circular, there’s an underlying implication that if cats stopped acting in ways worthy of worship, the Old Ones would stop believing in them, and may possibly take their gifts and offerings (such as magic) away. But cats cannot rely on their peers to tell them if they are being a “good cat” or not, as others might take advantage. Instead, they must draw inspiration from themselves, and their other lives. A cat’s instincts, both about herself and her friends, are the only pure, constant truth a cat can ever know.

Nessus
Dec 22, 2003

To witness titanic events is always dangerous, usually painful, and often fatal.



wiegieman posted:

Nekomancers, clearly.

I will not apologize for stealing from Monstress
It's spelled "Nekoromancer."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MMgGxL8aU4E

e: now with inferior eigo subs

Battle Mad Ronin
Aug 26, 2017
Would anyone be interested in a review of the new Blue Rose, the 2nd edition based on the AGE system? I bought it last year and have been reading it on and off for some time, before deciding to read it from cover to cover. It's a massive book, and somewhat hard to decipher. Writing a review out of my notes would help be a fun exercise.

JcDent
May 13, 2013

Give me a rifle, one round, and point me at Berlin!
Have you heard the good word of :justpost:?

RedSnapper
Nov 22, 2016

Welcome to Monastyr: Part 3 - Character creation: professions

Last time on Monastyr we found out about the nations of the Imperium Dominium of Man. Or at least the 10 that matter. With an overwhelming majority of two votes the Thread decided to roll a Ragadan. So, let’s take a closer look at what the character creation chapter tells us about the land of infinite vendettas:


Ages ago Ragada was the richest and strongest country on the Claw Peninsula but the civil war that broke out nearly two centuries ago turned it into a ruin. Nowadays it is a land of misery and famine, riddled with plagues and unrelenting conflict. Each year hate grows deeper into the people’s hearts. Nowadays nobody even thinks of peace or forgiveness. All that counts is destroying the enemy. Madness? Yes, it is.
Everyone who hails from these lands is mad. Mad and ruthless. A Ragadan is born a murderer. This place grows no other crops. Look to yourself, my lord, how you hold your pistol and your dagger. Then unsheathe your rapier and show me somebody from outside Ragada with such a weapon. In Agaria? Yes, perhaps there.. But their life is a constant struggle against elves and orcs.. Alongside Agars, Ragadans count as the most dangerous people in the world. If an elf was to fear someone, it would fear you, would it not? Could you handle an elf, my lord?
Two hundred years of civil war turned you all into killers. Today Ragada is infamous throughout the Dominium for her rancors – people you can hire for any task, from murder to kidnapping. Those people have no moral qualms, they forgot what a conscience is long ago. The war destroyed that nation, ripped them of their values, dignity and honor. All that’s left is hate and distrust. Ragadans are reclusive and cold. You’re not liked in the Dominium and it’s hard to wonder why, when one looks at you. There’s no warmth in you, no smile on your face and the look in your eyes brings a shiver down one’s spine.
It is hard to be your friend.


I believe those were the last words our Narrator ever spoke.

Traits:
Clash – every light wound you inflict in a clash becomes a heavy wound. Works with every melee weapon, including your fists. Absolutely deadly or pretty useful, depending on how you interpret the wonky wording (the word ‘clash’ is at different points used to describe fighting at the closest distance, a turn of combat AND the fight itself). Also it has no use outside the True Clash™ advanced combat rules but that will be a recurring thing…
Ragadan distrust – people trying to influence your Ragadan PC get a -4 to all authority and Credibility tests. I don't know how that’s really useful for a player character but at least you can try to talk Ragadan NPCs out of fighting to check if they have the other one.

A handful of notes:
As we will learn in latter chapters, rapiers used in different countries have their own distinct quirks like Ragadan rapiers being shorter and wider to better facilitate fighting in city alleys and indoors. There’s no mechanical differences, thank The Maker, but it’s a nice touch.
By the way, the answer to the elf question is: no, elves are absolutely deadly in one on one combat.
And finally, after reading that country description, how hard would it be to think of a national trait to replace that with the distrust with something that’s not completely useless for a PC? A bonus against fear, some additional combat feat.. just take the last paragraph and fashion some ‘eyes of a killer’ thing that gives you an intimidation bonus! Seriously..

OK, I’ve vented, I feel better, now back to our regular programing:

Character creation, step 2/10 – Profession

We get to choose between nine professions which, like nationalities, allow us to pick between two abilities each. Each profession comes with a minimum attribute requirement – since we won’t be rolling for attributes until step 4 (which should fit in the next update) the game suggests to note that number down for later. In other news – there’s no gender requirements for any of the jobs. All Dominium armies allow for female soldiers and its (hereditary) clergy is also equal opportunity.

If none of the professions suit our taste the game encourages us to make one up, complete with a brand new ability you work out with the GM. If you can’t think of any (or just don’t like to choice you get) there’s always:

The Retouch posted:

They say stories about exemplary people, inquisitors that make a man’s blood run cold with a glance, officers that inspire with a word… people who seem like they came out of a book or a legend. Tell me that you’re an ordinary man. Still an officer, but not as brilliant as others; a soldier, but not the best in the Dominium. Renounce your ability, be a regular priest, a regular soldier, just a historian, without all those seemingly inhuman skills and I’ll reward you right away! Here’s 2000 Kordins to use as you please in the chapters to follow.

The nine professions themselves are grouped into three categories, mirroring three sons of The Prophet (pics come from the 1st ed pdf – save for the quality issues, they’re the same as in the revised):

Martial posted:

You were to become a general – that was your parents, and especially your father’s, dream. How better to bring honor to your family then with great deeds in battle? That’s what your father did, as did his father and all your ancestors. Thus you received the best education your family could provide, letters of recommendation, and finally, their advice for the road, your fathers firm handshake and your mother’s wishes of good luck.
Fate decided differently. You came close to glory and laurels but finally you fell and lost everything. Who were you when your world collapsed?

Officer:

Required: Composure 12+
You were an officer in your country’s army. Maybe you still are – locked in a dead-end position and outranked by men ten years your junior. Whatever the case – your career might be dead but you’re still kicking and capable.

Abilities:
Command – in combat you may roll Credibility/Authority to take command of every friendly NPC whose Cred is lower than yours. Until the end of combat you, rather than GM, control their actions. You might need to repeat the roll with a -3 modifier if your NPCs start dying or visibly losing.
Watch and learn – upon entering combat you decide the initiative, instead of rolling for it. If two opposing characters have the ability, it cancels out and initiative is resolved as usual.

Soldier:

Required: Brawn 12+
Not everyone was born to lead. Most people in an army are just your regular grunts and so were you.

Abilities:
I’ll hold them off, sir! – when fighting multiple foes you get and extra die for defensive actions only.
Soldier’s lot – in combat you roll an extra d10 in addition to 3d20. You can then substitute your lowest d20 roll for the d10. It won’t likely give you a success but can lower a chance of total failure.

Scout:

Required: Perception 12+
Scouts have the most ungrateful job - all inconvenience and danger and none of the glory. On the other hand, they’re the only people in an army that have something resembling freedom.

Abilities:
Off the beaten path – you’re not slowed down when travelling through rough terrain (forests, mountains) and your perception rolls get no penalties for haste.
One of us – you get along with commoners. Unless they’re hostile, they’ll be willing to provide you with all the useful information. When in doubt weather this should work automatically, treat it as a +5 Information Gathering skill.

Clergy posted:

As the firstborn should follow Beocjan’s path, so should the second son follow Saolom. Thus, as your brother left home, for war and an officer’s career, you turned to the clergy. There’s little glory and splendor, even less chance of medals and acclaim, but much work, toil, study and prayer.
What for?
For your brethren and for The One, of course.

Priest:

Required: Faith 12+
Anointed as a priest of the Karian faith, you preach the word of the Prophet to the masses and office religious ceremonies. As a Karian priest you’ve not vowed celibacy, you can (and should) marry and have children to whom you’ll leave your church.

Abilities:
Reinforce faith – when rolling for faith every PC and friendly NPC can declare to rely on your attribute. You make the one roll for all of them and they pass or fail with you.
Blessing of the One – when you fail a test your life depended on you can reroll it (with the same modifiers) as a faith test. Doesn’t work in combat.

Monk:

Required: Wits 12+
Numerous monastic orders are tasked with preserving knowledge. Not the least part of that is translating ancient writings of the Rodians and studying the Cathedrals they left behind. Most monks lead a very ascetic way of life as a way of staving off the demons who seem to have a particular taste in scholars.

Abilities:
Wisdom – Pick three academic skills (ex. Law, mathematics, medicine, philosophy etc.). Set one of them at 6, one at 4 and one at 2.
Travelling scholar – you get no penalties for fatigue, hunger or lack of sleep until they accumulate to -6.

Inquisitor:

Required: Credibility 12+
Nobody’s really thrilled to see an Inquisitor arrive to town. While decidedly less psychotic than their counterparts in other fantasy RPGs they still get the bad rep for burning people’s relatives. The Inquisitor’s choice of abilities has a peculiar good cop/ bad cop vibe:

Abilities:
Respect – all actions taken directly against you have a -2 penalty. Works in combat
Innocent soul – when interrogating a person with a lesser social status and smaller Credibility score you can roll your Cred against their Composure to sweet-talk them into a Bond of 4 (we’ll talk Bonds and Allies when we get to them) for as long as you need to. You can have only one such Bond


Courtier posted:

So what is the role of the third son? History tells us the fates are least kind to him. He needs to care for himself, forge his own destiny…

Emissary:

Required: Credibility 12+
You’re a diplomat. It’s your job to know who is who on a foreign court, to know people and to know who they know.

Abilities:
Even the King himself – you have no trouble getting passage to important people. Guards, courtiers and other diplomats see you’re exactly where you belong. If the GM’s in doubt the skill automatically applies to the situation and calls for a roll, you get +5 to the appropriate skill.
Net of contacts – you get extra 3000 Kordins to purchase Allies and Retainers, you’re not restricted to the maximum of 4 like other PCs, and you get to improve Bonds for 20% less xp.

Artist:

Required: None
A poet, a painter or a minstrel – or any other you can think of – your best creative years are likely long passed but you can still live off past glory.

Abilities:
Opens all doors – similarly to the Emissary’s first ability, you can get anywhere they’d let in an artist and get +5 to your Bluff and Etiquette skills if contested.
Harmless – if you don’t actively participate in combat and call no attention to yourself by other actions, you’re left alone. Won’t save you from being captured, though.

Spy:

Required: Wits 12+
You’re perfectly ordinary diplomat/ trader who never dabbles in any unsavory things. Moving along.

Abilities:
Bribe – you can steer a conversation into a talk of a bribe in such a way, that even if the target doesn’t take it, they won’t feel insulted or alarmed in any way. There’s no explanation how that’s supposed to work mechanically.
Invisible – With a bit of makeup and dress-up you can pretend to be anyone from a lowly servant to a foreign courtier. When your cover is put into doubt you get +5 to related Bluff check.


That’s it for the professions. Again with the abilities – some of them seem really half-assed (all three courtiers get different versions of the same ability), some of them oscillating between useless and overpowered, depending on how you interpret the combat rules.

So – What is our profession?


Character creation, step 3/10 – Memoirs

Before we wrap this post up, we’ve still got time and room left for one more step. This step is a set of questions grouped into six broad categories: Where you’re from, what do you look like, what kind of a man you are, what do you think about the Dominium, what’s your attitude towards magic and what motivates you. I’ll transcribe a part of one so you have the idea.

quote:

[b] What do you think of the Dominium?[b]
How do you see your country and nation on the Dominium’s map? Are you proud of where you were born? It’s only natural to raise a young nobleman in the spirit of patriotism and you were no exception. How do you see it after all those years of success and defeat? Should an enemy attack your homeland, would you take up arms to die defending your land? Sometimes it feels like patriotism is on the retreat in the Dominium. Nowadays wars are fought by mercenaries, tied to the land they’re defending only by the hefty sums on their contracts. Hired with the money of a banker whom the king had to ask for a loan. Today’s war is turning into a business. Does that worry you? Do you miss chivalry?
And what do you think of the war with Valdor, or of Kord’s unceasing expansion? Have you ever wondered if we really need those wars? A thousand years ago the Prophet commanded us to destroy Valdor, but, by the Creator, doesn’t the Dominium have bigger problems to handle? Are you convinced we need that war? Do you believe the Agars when they warn us of the enemy at our gates?
..and so on for over 100 questions – I’d say they’re not intended to be answered in their entirety, just serve as the jump-off point but:

quote:

…devote a couple of minutes to these questions to help yourself roleplay your character. It’s a good idea to write them down and attach to your character sheet …
Yeah, we’re not doing that, but I would definitely pester my players about it.

Next time – we get into our primary and secondary attributes.

RedSnapper fucked around with this message at 14:02 on Jan 28, 2018

Night10194
Feb 13, 2012

We'll start,
like many good things,
with a bear.
Scout

For better sneaking up on those goddamn Ragadans.

Mors Rattus
Oct 25, 2007

FATAL & Friends
Walls of Text
#1 Builder
2014-2018

Scion: Origin: The World Unseen

Myths are too grand to exist in the normal World. In describing unattainable virtue, Platonic ideals or transcendant existence, they create the Overworld, the place where the gods reign. Where they speak of impurity, catharsis and death, they create the Underworld and its dark rivers. These are the grand places, drawing attention from the balance and complexity of the World to the simplicity and power of mythic story. However, the World is not merely a place of Scions seeking their heritage, either - mythic beasts and divine powers still live alongside humans, ot even have found or made mythic places where they rule. The secret lairs of monsters, the homes of giants. These places are known as Terra Incognita, not because they're unknown, but because they are tied to the mystery of legend.

The prison realms of the Titans are known as the Lands of Chains. There is no single prison realm, of course, though they may have conditions in common. The Titans that were ancestors to the Theoi mostly are imprisoned in the Underworld of Tartarus, beneath Hades, where their rage torments the Shades of evil mortals. The Tuatha de Danann exiled the Fomorians to some Midrealm underwater. And even the Theoi didn't send all their Titans there - Prometheus was spared, that he might be tortured in a Midrealm in the Caucasus mountains until freed by Heracles. What the Lands of Chains have in common are a few elements. First, they always have powerful, incorruptible guards. Their gates are exceptionally rare and always guarded by magic and sentinels. They do not connect to Touchstones, and they cannot be reached by the Axes Mundi. The Titans cannot break free of their restraints unless these restraints have already been loosed by plots or their attempts are aided by great divine power. No, you have no idea what any of those capitalized terms mean. We're getting to that in just a moment.

The World itself has some odder geography - basically, due to the supernatural twists over history, the GM can invent tiny sovereign nations as they like, unrecognized by the UN but known well to mystics and Scions. Rivers can change course, and entire cities can easily be invented. That's all before we hit actual Terra Incognita. It should also be noted that while myths represent a certain mode of reality and can contradict physical laws, neither god nor mortal can conclusively prove what hte precise relationship is. Philosophers, scientists and priests have all tried and failed. Some say that the World is the root of mythic reality, others that it is a degenerate version of mythic reality. Some posit a 'monomyth' that sets the pattern for all other legends. No argument or experiment has ever convinced enough people to form any consensus. Mythic Bleed is the effect that makes it much harder to figure out the relation between myth and nature.

How does it work? An archaeologist heads to Turkey to find the helmet of Achilles. It looks nothing like anything else dug up of the period. Manticores exist and hunt in western Asia; evolution cannot explain them at all. Hell, the existence of Scions themselves may be partly due to Mythic Bleed. Sometimes, it is caused by migration from the Otherworlds or Terra Incognita into the mainstream World, but in many cases, it's simply always been there. The Otherworlds are the places of the gods and myths. In many cases, Otherworlds have a core realm with attached subrealms. Asgard is an Overworld Godsrealm, with Valhalla as an attached subrealm under Odin's dominion, while Bilskirnir is Thor's subrealm, his hall in Asgard. Not all of the Aesir have personal subrealms - some just oversee halls in Asgard proper but lack the total control over their homes that the subrealms provide. It's not an exact science in any way. Two realms can even be connected by alliances or gates. The Norse realm Vanaheim is not Asgard, but has many connections to it by the gods and means of passage. These can break the conventional ctegories of World, Overworld and Underworld. What defines a subrealm is its connections to its primary realm and its dependence on it. If Asgard burned, Valhalla and Bilskirnir would probably burn, too. Vanaheim? Possibly not.

So, what is the Underworld? Well, first, it's plural. Underworlds. It is named such because many myths hold it exists under the earth, where bodies rot and ashes settle. Most Underworlds are attuned to specific mythologies, but some have never been claimed by any culture or pantheon. Some mystics believe that there can be no Overworld without an Underworld, and that any imabalance in one would cause disasters in the other...but some pantheons do not recognize the Underworlds as existing. They have other placves for the dead to go. So...how do the dead work? Scion posits a multiplicity of afterlives. Sometimes, a soul does not manifest in one at all. Some pantheons destroy souls for various reasons. Western scholarship, however, attempts to divide the dead into various types. Every culture has their own names for them. Some traits are universal - all souls, after death, lose the ability to easily take material form in the World, though there are exceptions via ritual, divine intervention or the powers of certain rare dead souls. All of hte Dead can, however, interact with each other while incorporeal.

Ancestors are those souls that exist in the World still due to the deliberate actions of their gods. They are not ghosts, lingering unnaturally or becoming lost. They either live in a Midrealm, in their tombs, or among their people. If among their people, their gods and cult traditions usually teach them how to guide and protect those people. Chthonians are fragments of the Primordials of the Underworld. They were never human, but they do all tasks too petty for a Scion to do yet inappropriate for a Shade. These are your demons, your heart-eating beasts, your psychopomps, your guardians of the gates. They rarely leave the Underworld, and when they do, it's often for grim or strange reasons. Eidolons are souls sent to the Overworld, often to exemplify pantheonic virtues, prepare for a higher stage of enlightenment or just as a reward for loyal service. Not all gods choose 'good' souls - or, indeed, any souls - as Eidolons. Eidolons appear, generally, as they did in the point of life during which the gods chose to uplift them, or at an age appropriate to whatever real they serve in a Godsrealm, but often changed to reflect divine influence - taller, more serene...or, in the case of einherjar, growling and fight-happy.

Ghosts are those lost souls who were either prevented from entering or were cast out from an Afterlife, Godsrealm or Midrealm. Some lose their way due to the nature of their deaths, usually strange or upsetting. They often return to familiar places, and may engage in obsessive or repetitive behavors. Ghosts almost never appear due to obsession or unfinished business, despite widespread belief, but may apepar to do so due to the trauma they experienced. Ghosts are more common now than they once were, and some say this is a sign of the growing strength of the Titans. Shades are the most common form of the Dead, maniesting after death in the Underworld. Pantheons which produce Shades use their own various mythic methods, with the aid of divine and Cthonian beings, to guide them to their promised Afterlives. A Shade usually appears as they did in life at the poiint of their death, though in cases where the gods punish or purify them, they may appear to be whatever age they were when the gods decided they deserved this. Shades are generally quiet, listless beings. Some pantheons remove their memories out of mercy or to prepare them for reincarnation.

So, since the soul manifestly exists, how is it defined? How does it work? Well, that's...nebulous. Every faith defines it differently, and they're all broadly correct, when dealing with their own. The Shen and Netjer treat the soul as a collection of aspects that can be separated and dealt with by different rites, while the Deva's rites work on the characteristics of the soul that hide a single, inner divine nature that must be liberated from the illusion of mortality. This can lead to unusual situations - the Shen may divide a soul into its Three Treasures, simultaneously sending one part to an AFterlife, one to a Godsrealm, and one to a role as an Ancestor. This kind of thing works on deep mythology and Fate. Gods cannot trivially divide or unify souls, but souls can change aspect, split or recombine when mythic tradition demands it.

There are millions of Shades. Most dewell in the realms prepared for them by their pantheons, known as Afterlives. Some pantheons torment Shades for their failings in life, some for eternity, some until they are sufficiently pruified. Some pantheons even allow a few to become Eidolons in an Overworld. Most pantheons with Shades, however, don't see the Underworlds as places of punishment - just necessities. After the vivid life of the World, what is left over must be cared for or made useful somehow. You appreciate life by knowing what comes next. The NEtjer, perhaps uniquely, make their home in an Afterlife, Duat, and reward Shades by giving them something resembling a mortal life in a place resembling the Nile Valley. They do not punish those they find unworthy - they destroy them. Some Primordials also dwell in the Underworld, in realms that personify destruction, absence or mutation. Unlike those of the OVerworld, they do not represent manifest Forms of existence, but the destruction or unmaking of essential things. This is the home of Chaos and Darkness - which, paradoxically, create. They make places opf twilight, plains of shifting bones, and homes for their nightmarish Exemplars. They are also the source of the Cthonians, neither divine nor dead. These creatures have colonized much of the Underworld, usually playing whatever part myth demands of them. However, wise Scions remember - the Cthonians are not true servants of anyone but Fate. The Furies are Cthonians.

So what is a Midrealm? It is a place that develops a mythic character powerful enough to be a domain of its own. They cannot be reached save by the appropriate gate or Axis Mundi. They are not ideal places, so they cannot be reached by a Touchstone. The smallest Midrealm is just an alley, a glade or a temple that cannot be entered except by proper means. The largest are mountains, nations. They take up no space if you do not enter them the proper way, but usually do have a rough geographic location set by tradition, or be said to exist near their most prominent gate. MYthic Bleed happens a lot in places like these - in the right parts of the UK, you dream of Camelot. Around a gate to Jotunheim, everything grows a little bigger than normal. Stories of these places usually feature guardians, either alive or geographic, or require entrants to demonstrate certain characters. Some say all Godsrealms and Afterlives were once Midrealms, pulled from the World by gods or made inaccessible by shifting Legend. Some Midrealms are indeed said to be places where the gods used to live, before they migrated away. Others belong to the rivals or foes of a pantheon, like Jotunheim. And the Orisha defy the trend of abandoningg the World, having made many Midrealms to remain close to their people. Other Midrealms never belonged to any pantheon. They are strange places, perhaps born of fears or yearnings given form by human legend. They may belong to extinct pantheons, or date back to some prior cycle of the World. Yhese are the strange places, reached by the Bermuda Triangle, perhaps, or other ways. Misty islands full of extinct beasts, fortresses of forgotten people. Rumors that pull in treasure hunters, explorers, and Scions hoping to create their own realms and legends.

Some example Midrealms include:
Camelot: Everyone knows Camelot existed, but no one knows exactly who Arthur and his knights raelly were or what they were doing. Their legacy lives on in France and the British Isles. The Tuatha de Dannan, the Plant Don and the Theoi all claim Camelot - the Theoi specifically via the route of having Roman guises and supporting the theory that Arthur was a Romano-British general. Some seekersh ave found ruins and artifacts - often strange ones. People have dug up modern plumbing in Celtic hillforts, or found bespoke rifles stamped with the signs of the Round Table. Arthurian cults claim the knights have returned and now scout for their king, who awakens in AValon and will return in the hour of need.
Doggerland: Until around 8000 years ago, most of the North Sea was above water. Archaeologists named it Doggerland, after the shallow area known as Dogger Bank, which is the highest remnant of the old land. People lived in Doggerland, until rising sea levels caused a tsunami that crushed the area. However, Doggerland remains as a Midrealm, accessible via underwater gaates at Dogger Bank. Explorers can enter it, track mammoths and find saber-toothed cats, but none of the original human inhabitants remain there. The Tuatha de Danann visit frequently, because according to their lore, three gods and goddesses came to Ireland before the Fir Bolg, escaping a great flood. Their true names have been lost, corrupted by Christian syncretism of their legends. (Similarly, the Tuatha de Danann do not use their own mythic name for Doggerland.) If they can prove those divinities were relatives of themselves, it solidifies their claims to Ireland. Thus, the Tuatha have supported a small colony in Doggerland, in the hopes that a new human population will call these unknown gods from hiding.
Jotunheim: Giants live in many midrealms, existing in many mythologies, but Jotunheim is the most famous, thanks to the interactions with the Aesir. Thor fights there, he had an affair with the giant jarnsaxa there and produced his half-giant Scion Magni, and so on. The greatest Jotnar live there, along with their families and vassals. The strongest of them are as powerful as the Aesir, and a few of them are Scions. Their chieftains include the enchanter Utgartha-Loki (not to be confused with actual Loki), actual Loki's dad, Farbauti, and the wisest of the Jotnar, Mimir. Gates into Jotunheim can be found in the wild places near old Norse settlements and in Asgard. The Midrealm itself is a Northern European wildnerness, but all flora, fauna and structures are between twice and ten times as large as their mundane counterparts.
Libertalia and the Gyre: The pirate republic, though it was more of a fellowship than a nation. They agreed to a few laws, promising to unite against any that blatantly broke them. The members, called Liberi, vowed to aid each other and liberate slaves, for many had once been slaves themselves. They were forbidden to work with any state's navy. By the end of the 17th century, the British Royal Navy and internal dissension threatened to finish them, so the Liberi captains turned to the gods - all sea gods, yes, but anyone who could help, especially the Orisha, whom many Liberi already followed. The gods sent them to the heart of the Sargasso Sea, where the seaweed grew up around them and enveloped the ships, binding them together. Anyone watching would have seen them drag the ships beneath the waves - but in truth, it took them to a secret, plant-choked ocean Midrealm instead. This is the Gyre, home to Libertalia in the form of a floating city of hundreds of ships. When it needs more room, it steals another ship. Modern cargo ships have made it possible for the Gyre to support over 10,000 people, who make a life out of theft and fishing and worship of the Orisha and the gods of the sea who saved them.

Next time: The Overworld.

Young Freud
Nov 26, 2006

Tuxedo Catfish posted:

a pun that bad/good deserves a better game than something derived from 5E

It's sounds like it should be the "crazy cat lady" Adept from Unknown Armies.

Wrestlepig
Feb 25, 2011

my mum says im cool

Toilet Rascal

Kavak posted:

It's still a piece of cloth headwear. Would it be any better if it was the Whispering Beret or Whispering Turban?

The tower of Latria in demons souls is based around an evil turban and it’s creepy as gently caress.

JackMann
Aug 11, 2010

Secure. Contain. Protect.
Fallen Rib
Yeah, I don't think the fact that it's a hat is the problem. However, fezzes are mostly treated as comical in western culure. This is partly because they seem so different from most of our hats (having no brim, especially) and partly because of stereotypes of Moroccans and other middle easterners as foolish, stupid, and superstitious. We've largely moved away from those stereotypes (though they do pop up, and definitely pop up a lot in the more tone-deaf pulp adventures), but we still don't take the fez very seriously.

EDIT: To be clear, I'm not saying you're racist if you think the fez is ridiculous looking. I'm saying that the reason you think it's ridiculous looking is largely because of how racists have portrayed it in the past.

Comrade Koba
Jul 2, 2007

Kavak posted:

It's still a piece of cloth headwear.

Lose 1d8/3d20 SAN as you don the Terrible Trilby of Tsathoggua. :cthulhu:

Nessus
Dec 22, 2003

To witness titanic events is always dangerous, usually painful, and often fatal.



JackMann posted:

Yeah, I don't think the fact that it's a hat is the problem. However, fezzes are mostly treated as comical in western culure. This is partly because they seem so different from most of our hats (having no brim, especially) and partly because of stereotypes of Moroccans and other middle easterners as foolish, stupid, and superstitious. We've largely moved away from those stereotypes (though they do pop up, and definitely pop up a lot in the more tone-deaf pulp adventures), but we still don't take the fez very seriously.

EDIT: To be clear, I'm not saying you're racist if you think the fez is ridiculous looking. I'm saying that the reason you think it's ridiculous looking is largely because of how racists have portrayed it in the past.
To be fair I think the main place where people get exposed to fezzes other than cartoon characters like Morocco Mole, is the Shriners, who - for all of their good work with burn hospitals and so on - do in fact look pretty ridiculous.

JackMann
Aug 11, 2010

Secure. Contain. Protect.
Fallen Rib
And the shriners basically started as a bunch of freemasons cosplaying as Arabs.

Also, I will say that the name doesn't help, since "fez" just sounds funny in English, being so close to "fizz."

By popular demand
Jul 17, 2007

IT *BZZT* WASP ME--
IT WASP ME ALL *BZZT* ALONG!


Now here's a truely frightening tale of a red hat:
https://vk.com/video2997131_164273115

Mors Rattus
Oct 25, 2007

FATAL & Friends
Walls of Text
#1 Builder
2014-2018

Scion: Origin: Somewhere Over The Rainbow

The Overworld is a sort of metaphysical area that contains many realms, each also commonly called Overworlds. Often, these places are associated with the sky, stars, virtue, truth or purity. Often, they are called Heavens, if you're interested in that kind of thing, they are also sometimes associated with the Platonic Forms or with enlightenment. Yes, evil, deception and so on can exist in the Overworld, but they're players and props in myths of higher themes. The venomous dragon is there to be slain, or to be the symbol of sin in the one that defeats or accepts it, to approach enlightenment. The gods and pantheons can override these themes by legend - as can Fate, which doesn't have to obey the rules it sets.

The most common Overworlds are Godsrealms - places made or ruled by gods or pantheons as a whole. Some gods accept the souls of certain dead, as judged by their pantheon, and make them Eidolons, bright and strong, unlike the Shades of the Underworld. In some Godsrealms, they live lives of pleasure or plenty, or act out a Pantheon's values, such as in Swarga (the paradise of Indra's rule, where souls work to final liberation of self) or Vlahalla, where the einherjar feast with Odin and battle freely. Eidolons are usually no longer bound by the limits of flesh in doing what the gods tell them to do. Not all gods dwell in these Overworld Godsrealms, however, and not all pantheons send their righteous dead to them.

Other Overworlds include Primordial Worldbodies - mixtures of natural purviews, places beyond place, and homes to the vast consciousness that is the Primordial. Each Primordial is a plane in itself, a representation of the immense energies and principles they used to create the World and maintain it. Some Primordials allow no passage into themselves, and are known of only in legend. Others are deeply inhospitable to life due to, for example, overwhelming Fire or Darkness, but even these may shape parts of themselves to allow visitors to survive there. While the Pimordials are theoretically all-powerful, they don't always crush invading foes. And there are native beings within the Primordials - Elementals, split off from the source and living as independent beings, and Exemplars, who represent some aspect or aspects of the Primordial's identity. Both kinds of being are considered to be Titans, and if they were involved in the Titanomachy, they were imprisoned. Thus, to speak to some Primordials, you may need to visit their imprisoned 'selves'.

The World itself contains realms within it - places the gods set aside for their own use, hidden kingdoms, wild places that cannot be easily mapped. Some pantheons do not follow the stories of ideal heavens or gloomy underworlds. All gods watch the World and have sent servants there or walked on it themselves, defining legendary or holy places by their actions. Some of these places even arise from no particular myth, but from the magic of mortal hope and fear, or by the nature of Fate. Primordials, however, do not have realms in the World. They made it, but as realms themselves, they would destroy or displace the World should they ever return to it. However, it can also be saide that the Primordials who dwell in the World are the World - the winds, oceans and stone. It may be that their nature is to sleep and rest and have long dreams that are the laws of nature that manifest in all life. Then again, maybe their slumber is temporary, and when they awaken, all will return to Chaos for a new cycle of violent creation.

So what do you do if there's a strange realm inside the bounds of your nation-state? It depends on the situation. Most governments will claim a realm whose gate lies in their territory as part of their territory...and then well actively attempt to leave it alone. They don't usually collect tax or even enforce law save in extreme circumstances, such as faerie gold flooding the market or a serial killer hiding out in a mythic land. Human residents of these realms, generally encouraged by the gods, do not often have government registrations of any kind. They live in self-reliant, closed societies that care for and punish their own, and if their problems erupt outwards, that's when national police agencies call in experts or even Scions to help. When a realm straddles a border, is in international waters or defies georgraphy, they're usually handled case-by-case. Pantheons typically try to prevent or stop sources of conflict before nations notice, but they don't always succeed, and places like Libertalia may prove troublesome just in how they act. Strange places that are easier to visit are treated a bit more formally, though they often are what in our world would be mere rumor and superstition. They're just...true, and real. Regional governments tend to kep lists of dangerous locations and quietly monitor their edges. A national park might have a large chunk carved out as a troll preserve, but that would only be noted on classified paperwork. When strange places bring dangerous or disruptive things, the governments usually turn to consultants - historians, anthropologists, engineers, cultic leaders. In more corrupt areas, vigilantes or even gangsters might get involved. And when caution, ritual and bulldozers all fail? Ask for help from a Scion.

Strange places, as noted, aren't other realms. They're definite locations. You can find them on a map, if such a map existed. They might be bigger or smaller on the inside, or space and time might be strange around them, but anyone can enter or leave. They might be products of Fatebinding and legend, errant magic, or just Fate. Some surround gates or manifestations of the Axes Mundi, manifesting lesser versions of what lies beyond. Many of these strange places are not tied to any traditional mythology. Unshaped power twists the land, or draws shape from urban legend and superstition. Mole people in the subways, with pet sewer crocodiles. Giant stray dogs, swarms of extremely smart rats, bloody gardens with immortal farmers. Other places are claimed by pantheons, and the longer the myths and cults uphold these claims, the more mythology influences the area, good or bad. Old temples and groves attract strange things - sometimes helpful, sometimes not - and sometimes these things follow the faithful, even far from traditional sites. It may seem odd for a giant to show up in Minnesota, but it happens, and no one is quite sure why. Some monsters begin as normal creatures or people, warped by supernatural energies in periods of hours or generations. Creatures pass through gates or Touchstones, or the World just produces them as needed.

Despite all these unusual features, strange places are often forgotten or ignored. They rarely show up on surveys, their records are lost, reports of them are vague. Locals, Scions and those who understand the local mythology are not affected by this, and memories are not erased. Rather, people just...try to ignore these places and avoid them. Stories grow inconsistent, recording devices fail inconveniently but believably. Every strange place is unique, but they do come in a few broad types.
Folds are places that collect power due to some association with gods or Titans. The most common Folds are around popular or ancient places of worship. A temple to Odin might have a cup within it that grants the drinker superlative poetic skill briefly. Some Folds are around shrines to gods no one has heard of, or mishmashes of folk memory and pop culture. These gods don't exist, but may still have some weak supernatural influence - a sign that perhaps, someday, they will exist. It is said that there is an old stone deck at the site Odysseus went ashore in Ithaca, haunted by the ghosts of Penelope's suitors, who seek vengeance on the descendants of their killer or demand others do so for them.
Lairs are what happens when a titanspawn or other monster claims a place long enough. It warps to suit their nature, though exactly how can be hard to tell. Minotaurs may seek out mazes, or mazes may spring up around them. It's impossible to say which way that one goes. Perhaps Fate just ensures that anywhere a minotaur decides to live develops odd paths and dead ends. In Boston COmmon, there are fairy mounds that can take you to distant places, but only with the permission of the mound-dwellers, who will challenge you with riddles.
Holy Grounds are places dedicated to a god, either over great periods of time or with great zeal. These places often provide advantages to Scions or other relatives of the honored god, such as a Scion of Areas finding a store of potent weapons only she can lift. Cults fiercly protect their holy places, however. It is said that under the foundations of the Acropolis, cults sacrifice to Athena. That wouldn't be strange, except that members of these cults speak archaic Greek, have no knowledge of modern Athens, and depart by fissures and caves that smell of wood smoke rather than industry.
Liminalities are strange places that expand a mundane location. Sewers may open into great vaults that appear on no map. In old libraries, you might wander into unmarked stacks or apartments. Some of these places are nearly seperate realms, very hard to enter without the right route, informant or prayer. In Varanasi, it is said that some streets are thousands of years old, and all the maps are wrong. Turn enough corners, and the stars will shift, and you will meet rakshasa veterans of the war against the Devas. They're nice old people...or maybe they're potent demons who will do anything to be left alone.

Stories are usually far more useful than maps in finding your way around Terra Incognita. Not all maps are inaccurate, but they must be interpreted by the correct mythology. Relative positions in space matter less. Sometimes, you also need proper guides, or keys, or permissions. Gates are the primary means f passage from the World to more closed-off mythic places, or to travel between mythic places. There is no typical gate - every pantheon's myths make their own types, and they can even vary within pantheons. Olympus may lay between Doric columns, and also by climing into a cave full of hallucinatory mist. Every gate has a key, an action, item or circumstance that must be used for passage. This can be an object, a poem, even a state of mind. Gates my need a different key depending on the direction you go through them, or even be one-way. Many gates contain realms of their own, but these tunnels, woodlands or palaces primarily exist just to enable passage - they aren't really destinations of themselves.

Overworld Gates are rare, and link the World ot the Godsrealms, primarily by passing through other realms attuned to the same mythology or made for the convenience of gods and difficult to use for anyone else. Travelers are usually stuck using the Axis Mundi instead. No one knows any gate that exists to connect the World to a Primordial worldbody, except for rare situations in which the Primordials directly create them.
Underworld Gates...well, the easiest way to get there is to devote yourself to a religion that has one and then die. But the living can enter the Underworld - find the right cave, tunnel or river and you can find an appropriate Afterlife. These gates are rarely shared by multiple pantheons, though they can be. Their keys usually involve ordeals along the journey, fierce Cthonian guards, or trouble getting out again. The Primordials of the Underworld, like their Overworld counterparts, have no gates to the World save those they create, and then usually only to unleash some terrifying creation for reasons none can say. Death gods can create more convenient gates to the World or Overworld, but they always guard them well.
Midrealm Gates are more common and generally cluster around the Worldly counterpart to the Midrealm. Their keys tend to be specific actions. For example, you get to Mag Mell, the Irish land of youth and joy, by sailing west of Ireland and using specific star charts, or by dying gloriously. Avalon can be reached by sea as well, but only after you perform the correct mythically resonant actions in Glastonbury Tor and then immediately head for the coast and sail off.

Some example Gates include:
Bifrost: The Fleeting Bridge, which connects the World and Asgard. Bifrost theoretically exists inside any rainbow. To cross it, one needs the presence of a natural rainbow, plus a key. Acceptable keys are being an Aesir Scion or Eidolon (such as an einherjar or valkyrie), or secret knowledge given by Odin. Until Ragnarok, the god Heimdall may also bar anyone he choose from ascending Bifrost. In the past, he refused passage to Thor and his descendants, and he's still sometimes testy about that. Bifrost is the length of a morning's ride on a swift horse.
Fengdu Ghost City: The Shen have coordinated management of the dead with their mortals, opening the gates to Diyu where it is most convenient for mortals to pay respect. Fengdu Ghost City was founded in the Eastern Han Dynasty and has always been a special place to honor the dead and for dead souls to undergo the ordeals and paperwork needed to determine their destinies. The living use their funerary rites as keys to enter Diyu, simulating the actions of a soul bound for the region of Diyu they wish to enter. Fengdu has a Midrealm in which souls perform duplicate actions of the mortal city's landmarks and their purposes, sucha s the bridge that determines virtue to the Last Glance Tower, where the dead take a final look at the World.
The Sidhe: Sidhe are earhen mounds taht lead to the Celtic Otherworlds. The otherworldly beings take their name from the sidhe, and are more properly known as the ao si or daoine sidhe - the people of the mounds. True sidhe contain small palaces and hedge gardens, kept in trust by the daoine sidhe for the Tuatha de Danann. These exist within the gate rather than the World, and contain doors to one or more Otherworlds. These doors are locked unless a visitor entertains or deceives the daoine sidhe, which serves as the key. Violence and threats are useless.

Next time: The Axes Mundi

Cythereal
Nov 8, 2009

I love the potoo,
and the potoo loves you.

Kurieg posted:

The stated inspirations for Pugmire are basically what you'd expect. Mouse Guard, Redwall, Nimh, Watership Down, Gamma World, Thundarr the Barbarian. Perhaps most hilariously for Me is Ginga: Nagareboshi Gin. AKA: The anime with the dogs that fight bears and do this.

Oh hey, it's Inherit the Earth adapted to a tabletop game! Inherit the Earth is an old computer RPG from the early 90s, but it was this exact premise and backstory presented for this game.

Kavak
Aug 23, 2009


I blame the Shriners too. This scenario could work for a Turkish player group or someone else in the fez-wearing regions of the world, but in the west it's hopeless.

Flavivirus
Dec 14, 2011

The next stage of evolution.

Kavak posted:

I blame the Shriners too. This scenario could work for a Turkish player group or someone else in the fez-wearing regions of the world, but in the west it's hopeless.

As far as I'm aware we don't have shriners in the UK, but Tommy Cooper - and thus vintage comedy acts - are even worse for removing dread from a fez.

oriongates
Mar 14, 2013

Validate Me!


Night10194 posted:

I'm sorry, are you not terrified of the fez? It was described as BLOOD RED.

could it be!? The the red hat of pat ferrick!?

EDIT: drat, too late to the joke.

oriongates fucked around with this message at 23:54 on Jan 28, 2018

By popular demand
Jul 17, 2007

IT *BZZT* WASP ME--
IT WASP ME ALL *BZZT* ALONG!


I beat you to this joke :agesilaus:
E:vvvvv :agesilaus::agesilaus:

By popular demand fucked around with this message at 23:56 on Jan 28, 2018

oriongates
Mar 14, 2013

Validate Me!


And you beat me to acknowledging that you beat me to that joke.

Bieeanshee
Aug 21, 2000

Not keen on keening.


Grimey Drawer

Cythereal posted:

Oh hey, it's Inherit the Earth adapted to a tabletop game! Inherit the Earth is an old computer RPG from the early 90s, but it was this exact premise and backstory presented for this game.

Holy poo poo, I remember that.

Down With People
Oct 31, 2012

The child delights in violence.
RE: hat discourse, I readily acknowledge that you could make a story about an evil hat that's actually scary, but you'd have to do it in a very different way to how this scenario does it.



THE BLOOD RED FEZ – PART TWO

You Can Keep Your Hat On


When investigators get to the Whitechapel address they find Professor Smith outside, pacing nervously. He's relieved to see the team and quickly ushers them inside without explaining anything. Spot Hidden reveals a fez-wearing figure at the end of the street who disappears around a corner as soon as he's noticed.

Smith tells the team what he knows. Four days ago, a well-dressed gentleman approached landlady Mrs. Grim and offered her a generous amount for a room. He was joined by a group of men in fezzes dragging another man, semi-conscious. He claimed that the man was his brother and a drug-addict that he was attempting to treat. Over the next couple of days, tenants complained of strange whispering noises throughout the building and mysterious shadows seen on the landing. When the screaming started on the third day, the gentleman tried to pay Grim more money. When they got worse the day after, Grim sent for the police; the group beat a hasty retreat before they could arrive. They found a diseased and malnourished man in the room, tied to the bed. He whispered the name of Professor Smith to the police doctor before passing out. Smith was summoned, and he recognised the man as Matthew Pook.

The cops immediately lost interest in the case, since there was no-one to arrest – just some sick dude on a bed. Smith called the investigators because he needs help removing Pook. He's not sure if whatever he's got is contagious and even if it's not, he's worried that he might come under attack. He's familiar with the men in fezzes and knows they represent a sinister organisation, but he doesn't have time to give the investigators the full run-down right now.

The tiny room where Pook is being kept reeks. Two candles provide the only light in the room; the surroundings are strewn with discarded papers and remains of past meals. Pook lies on the bed, withered and emaciated and still wearing the leather strips that once bound him. He wears nothing but stained smallclothes and most unusually, a fez. Another man in a cloak is examining him; he introduces himself as Dr. Niels Hobbs the police doctor.

Hobbs admits that he cannot tell what's wrong with Pook, who seems to be suffering some wasting illness but is stable at the moment. Anyone who touches the fez suffers intense nausea and fleeting visions and immediately loses 1D6 MAG. It can't be removed at all; close examination reveals that flesh is growing into the rim of the fez, fusing it to Pook's head. What's more, curious investigators will notice that it constantly emits a low hum, in fact a sibilant whispering coming from inside the fez – SAN 1/1D4 to hear that.

Around the time the investigators start getting really curious about the hat, Pook suddenly wakes up and screams. His body heaves one last time before he dies. As soon as he's dead, the fez falls off his head, leaving behind a visible ring of bare flesh where it was joined. Dr. Hobbs leans down to examine the corpse, but as soon as he does that the candles go out and the now undead Pook bites his face off. Pook is now an Undead Servitor of the Blood Red Fez. The flesh around his heads wells and stretched until it looks like a fez, pulling the face back tight. The tongue becomes as long as a neck tie and splits into sharp tendrils at the end, almost like the tassels on a fez. And of course, he will kill everyone in the room if the investigators don't put him down first.



Ah poo poo I wasted the best hat joke right away

The investigators are now in the possession of the Blood Red Fez. The redness of the fez is that of dried blood, and considering the funky smell of the thing investigators might guess that's what it is. Strange symbols like hieroglyphics seem to lie under the fabric, occasionally catching the light. Being near the Fez for more than half an hour calls for SAN 1/1D4 (this is still stupid) while handling the Fez at all requires a CON roll to get past the sensation of nausea. It constantly whispers and even seems to vibrate slightly. Putting on the Fez at this point is just about the stupidest thing you could do.


don't put on the loving fez i swear to god

Professor Smith immediately calls for it to be destroyed, but nothing works; fires go out as soon as they touch the Fez and the freaky thing knits itself back together as the blade of a knife passes through it. The team has little choice but hold onto it for now. If anyone is afraid of taking it, Smith is willing to hold onto it and will be glad to let any wary investigators stay at his home in St. John's Wood. Anyone sleeping in the same building as the Fez can enjoy a night of bad dreams and visions of fez-wearing figures stalking around.

Smith suggests reconvening at the Orient Club the next day; if any of the investigators are women, they will not be allowed in, but Smith will take the discussion to a nearby cafe instead. He explains that he's been in contact with Professor Demir, a colleague in Constantinople who warned him about the occultist Menkaph and the dangers of the Blood Red Fez. The Fez needs to be brought to him, as only he knows the way to destroy it. However, Smith cannot make the journey, since he made enemies of Selim Makryat last time he was there and would be killed as soon as he got to Turkey.

At this point in history, the Orient Express is the fastest way to get to Constantinople from London, but is also extremely expensive. Luckily, a more benevolent occultist by the name of Baron von Hofler has agreed to sponsor the trip and will meet the team at Vienna.

Next time: researching the Fez!

Midjack
Dec 24, 2007



Red Fez Enterprise Linux

Mors Rattus
Oct 25, 2007

FATAL & Friends
Walls of Text
#1 Builder
2014-2018

Why would anyone want this hat, anyway? It doesn't even do anything useful.

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Wrestlepig
Feb 25, 2011

my mum says im cool

Toilet Rascal
Fez degeneration is the name of my new post punk band.

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