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Okay, so beyond the medieval Wicker Man village plagued by a werewolf in the depths of a forest inside the mental ward of a prison spaceship flying through Hell, we pass through Escher's Relativity, and now we've reached David Bowie's castle from the Labyrinth. Okay. Also it's a Lord of the Flies reference. And most of the "horror" is just that mental health science was loving awful in the 1800s and this spaceship from the future somehow has mental health science treatments from the 1800s. megane fucked around with this message at 16:24 on Aug 2, 2017 |
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Aug 2, 2017 16:19
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"Prisoner #9943710 smiles and pats you on the back. Make a FRIENDLINESS check!" "Oh poo poo -- that puts me at 10 Friendliness!" "The lights flicker and turn rainbow-colored as glitter pours from the ceiling, coalescing into the form of an enormous Helpful Buddy!"
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Aug 3, 2017 08:27
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FATAL & Friends: When a woman gives birth, she suffers 6d6 Damage.
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Aug 5, 2017 01:35
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I feel like I should keep a tally. Inside our prison spaceship flying through Hell, we've now:
Did I miss any?
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Aug 8, 2017 03:48
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I mean, you could say "Tzeench is an insane idiot whose actions are completely purposeless and random, but his followers are (wrongly) convinced that there's some secret purpose to it all, which makes them feel smart and special and superior." But that's not what GW does.
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Aug 18, 2017 04:46
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"The demon removes his hood, and it's THE MAJOR!" "...Who?" "The major! Wait... wait, you haven't seen him before, have you. Uhhh. He's this... I mean, he hasn't... okay, right, you all find yourselves in a flashback!"
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Aug 23, 2017 14:33
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Cover image is some generically spooky men with black hats and weird eyes, overlaid with the Sefirot, some random futhark and hieroglyphs, a DNA diagram, a couple of hydrocarbons, the number 23, and of course the Zener card symbols. Yyyep, got ourselves a 90s urban fantasy book here.
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Sep 1, 2017 03:58
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Numenera is yet another game that just staggers me with its lack of innovation. You're reality-hopping bearers of the secret power underlying all reality, who twist causality itself to your whim and change identities like coats... and just by pure coincidence the archetypes your mystical power can manifest in are exactly The Fighter, The Rogue, and The Wizard, and the primary thing you do in the multiverse is collect Magic Items that let you do things like see in the dark or shoot fireballs.
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Sep 18, 2017 17:25
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Roll a 17-19: the target is dead, but his mother will come after you soon and she's even nastier.
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Sep 20, 2017 19:01
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This makes me think of the Fair Folk from Exalted (2e at least, I dunno how they are in 3e). They go on and on about how they're creatures of chaos and nightmare, shapeless masters of the dreamscape and so on... but they're no more at home in Deep Chaos they they are in the normal world. Their home is the border, and just like mortals exposed to chaos mutate and go crazy, the Fair Folk have been corrupted by normalcy. Exposure to reality has left them with individual identities, motivations that are almost logical if you squint, and even a tendency to stick to a single default form when they aren't showing off how ~unknowable~ they are. It's an interesting dynamic, since for all their bluster about obliterating Creation, they'd be just as dead as everyone else if it actually happened.
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Sep 21, 2017 21:47
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There is a very real problem: if you offer players choices that you intend to be flavorful roleplaying options (e.g. "my mother was a blacksmith"), but then attach benefits to those choices that help some classes/builds more than others (e.g. "+1 to hit with hammers"), then players will either a) pick the choice that gives them the best mechanical benefit, story be damned, or b) be punished for making a cool, distinctive, flavorful choice. You can make a fighter whose family are all sorcerers... but it's objectively better for you if your mother was a smith. Just like every other fighter ever. The thing is that Paizo saw this problem, and their solution was "well, what if the bonuses are really really small?". That doesn't fix the problem. I'm still pressured to be a smith's kid, the only difference is now I don't even get anything cool for doing so.
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Sep 27, 2017 21:25
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NGDBSS posted:True. The intent there is to limit how many things you can stack in one place, but the problem there is that such design is fixing symptoms of a problem rather than the root cause. Better to just limit how many drat things provide bonuses in the first place, and make them each meaningful as opposed to piddly +1's and +2's that you're supposed to grab a horde of in your accounting homework. Well, or just say "things don't stack, period." The problem is they made this system to prevent people from layering a million tiny bonuses on top of each other, but then there are dodge bonuses and insight bonuses and expertise bonuses and sacred bonuses and morale bonuses and profane bonuses and and and and and the end result is... you can layer a million tiny bonuses on top of each other, but also there's a ton of bookkeeping.
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Oct 4, 2017 23:10
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Halloween Jack posted:My understanding is that when you do a Move, your stat simply determines how many options you get to pick. This is less staid than it may sound, since the relevant "stat" is always in flux based on stuff like how much Blood you have/spend, the quality of the Feeding Ground, if the fellow vamp you're dealing with owes you Debts, and so on. The other mechanics replacing dice are Debt, which are tokens you can spend to influence people (just like strings in MH) and Status, where whenever vampires interact socially, you figure out which of you is higher on the social ladder and that one will just win any argument outright... unless shenanigans take place. So as a player you have to make shenanigans happen in order to stand up to your social betters.
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Oct 5, 2017 22:40
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Really enjoying the review of NewL5R. Thus far it looks a lot better than previous editions, in my humble opinion. Shuji in particular sound great, and I like that some kata and kiho interact with social attacks, so maybe your fightman won't be reduced to a piece of furniture as soon as people start talking. Shame they still couldn't resist making a billion dumb magic spells that do literally everything, though.
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Oct 10, 2017 22:49
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Mankind spread across the stars, and when there were no more stars to claim, we set our will against the boundaries of reality and identity. But though we cast off our bodies, shaped the fabric of galaxies to suit our whim, became something our old selves wouldn't even have comprehended, one truth remained, a pattern etched into our souls that a billion years of progress and evolution could not expunge: casters rule, and fighters drool.
megane fucked around with this message at 16:40 on Oct 17, 2017 |
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Oct 17, 2017 16:38
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You should keep a running total of how many cards are just "you encounter [NUMBER] hostile [MONSTER]s in a [TERRAIN TYPE]." That batch was, what, like 5/6?
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Oct 18, 2017 17:52
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I will never be able to play Starfinder because as soon as anyone mentions the Gap I will hear "(not the store)" after it and be unable to keep a straight face. Thanks a lot, ARB.
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Oct 23, 2017 03:29
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hyphz posted:the Panic Station problem Haven't heard of this one. I looked it up and it's some Mafia-esque thing about zombies, but what's the problem you're referring to? By context, I assume you can lose and then be expected to keep playing despite having no actual reason to do so or goals to accomplish; am I close?
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Oct 29, 2017 22:06
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Dallbun posted:The Deck of Encounters Set One Part 13: The Deck of Small Children, Skeletons, and Spiders  The room with four skeletons makes it sound like the dungeon architect was given very specific instructions; off the second floor bathroom is the Room With Four Skeletons In It, and it'd better be exactly the right size, mister.
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Oct 30, 2017 13:49
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Golconda is actually a sandwich.
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Oct 31, 2017 02:04
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I think Undying does it better. When two vampires meet (whether they know each other or not) their immediate instinct is to figure out which of them is higher on the pecking order. So instead of going nuts and running away, instead you just realize instinctively that this guy is bigger, faster, and cooler than you, and could probably feed you your own shoes if he wanted to, which he very well might. Now, what do you say to him?
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Oct 31, 2017 05:42
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It bothered me, so let me point out that in real life an omikoshi is a portable shrine carried around during Japanese festivals, usually by a sizeable team of people (who shout "wasshoi" to keep time). Why was this word used to refer to some sort of virtual reality simulation of a different virtual reality? Uhh, well, you see, e: maybe the Sanhedrin know
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Oct 31, 2017 21:02
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I imagine there's a sizeable helping of not really understanding how probability works thrown in there, too. A lot of them seem to think that having convoluted dice rules will somehow make the results more unpredictable or more dramatic or more "natural" in some way, when in fact from a mathematical standpoint it's usually exactly the opposite.
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Nov 2, 2017 05:07
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Summoning is a huge mechanic that wrecks game balance completely unless heavily restricted and tuned with utmost care, and even then increases the complexity and cognitive load of combat by massive degrees. So naturally we have to give every spellcaster the ability to summon pretty much anything they can dream of, including other spellcasters, whenever they want to, for no cost, as a minor afterthought. Does getting hit while casting even cause you to lose the spell in Starfiler, or is even the chapter quote a lie? megane fucked around with this message at 17:57 on Nov 13, 2017 |
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Nov 13, 2017 17:55
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Fail Early Fail Often Ghost is cool; "he's got a ton of treasure, so, uh, I guess just make up some way to screw the PCs out of it later" is not.
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Nov 15, 2017 15:59
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That's pretty much their design spec, though. Take an existing D&D monster, glue some sci-fi bits onto it at random, job's done. Hence we've got ancient w- TECH wizards, who use dark, uh, technology... to become immortal by storing their souls in a phyl- I mean, an... electro... tangram... circuit. Yeah.
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Nov 23, 2017 14:45
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Bieeardo posted:Christmas came early. WRONG, you're just holding Christmas at the incorrect time and here are some scrolls to prove it 
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Dec 3, 2017 04:40
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Kurieg posted:Jesus poo poo it was a geocities page. This site is the visual equivalent of a 13-year-old screaming Linkin Park lyrics in your ear.
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Dec 5, 2017 21:00
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What a bizarre choice to have this interesting setup and then just go "...but instead it just attacks somebody at random, lol." It's a golem! Golems are tailor-made for "servant takes instructions too literally" plots. How about: the wine-merchant gives it this order, but it turns out that he himself is unknowingly a descendant of the ancient rival. Guess a Hatfield and a McCoy managed to patch things up for a while at some point. So now he has his own golem constantly trying to kill him, but he doesn't want to explain what's going on or ask for help because it implicates him in attempted murder. If the PCs read his mind or whatever they'll learn that he's pissed at the priest for giving him a defective golem, since he legitimately doesn't know why it's after him.
megane fucked around with this message at 19:01 on Dec 22, 2017 |
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Dec 22, 2017 18:59
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The Legion are great and basically put all other orc types to shame. Bunch of soldiers walking down the street and stopping to salute an interior decorator. You da real hero 
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Jan 3, 2018 03:30
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There should be a lengthy German word for the kind of rule or sidebar that was obviously added as a direct result of a heated argument with the GM. For instance: "a swallowed creature can cut its way out by dealing 50 points of damage to the tarrasque’s digestive tract (AC 25). Once the creature exits, muscular action closes the hole; another swallowed opponent must cut its own way out." No, Frank, you can't just follow Brian out. Because... because of muscular action. Muscular... no, see, muscular action closed the hole, uh, and now... Well I mean it was open just long enough for Brian to, to squeeze out, and... No, you need to cut your way out yourself. No, you don't get to count the damage Sarah's doing from the outside. Because I said so, that's why!
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Jan 9, 2018 01:11
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PurpleXVI posted:I love the POLLING GOD, that seems like the sort of bizarre encounter that would absolutely fit into a high-magic D&D setting. ARE YOU HAPPY WITH YOUR CURRENT DIVINE SPELL PROVIDER? IF NOT, ALLOW ME TO EXTEND TO YOU THIS LIMITED-TIME OFFER OF SALVATION AND BLESSINGS, YOURS FOR ONLY £19.99 PER MONTH FOR 24 MONTHS
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Jan 9, 2018 17:36
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Precambrian posted:I just need to ask: how the hell does a black book agency that deals with the entire supernatural and extraterrestrial database of the US Government have part-time employees? Do they work 20 hours here and also pick up some shifts bartending on the side, or are these semi-retirees or something? You'd think the guys sworn to the utmost secrecy would be compensated with full-time employment at the very least. just got done wrestlin this acid spittng wraith from hell, got cursed, seeein these wierd eyes all over the place now. gotta be at my shift at chipotle in 20 #milleniallife
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Jan 11, 2018 22:10
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Kavak posted:It's still a piece of cloth headwear. Would it be any better if it was the Whispering Beret or Whispering Turban?
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Jan 28, 2018 06:20
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Quake with terror, for your beloved friend has risen from the grave as a Fez Zombie and now he has come fwhy are you laughing, stop laughing.
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Jan 29, 2018 00:55
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Whoa, yeah, man, what the world really needed was a book written by an aging white guy about how
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Jan 30, 2018 01:36
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Cassa posted:Sooooo I'm always slightly at a loss as to just whom these sourcebooks are for, so what's this latest coalition war books purpose? "We really felt like the 90,000,000 pages of stupid details we've printed about the Coalition and their endless nigh-identical skull-covered vehicles and the eyerollingly over-the-top scifi fascist poo poo they do and how its actually totally justified and they're just antiheroes you guys just weren't enough yet. ...game? What game?"
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Feb 18, 2018 15:08
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Just because RPG writers like making up excuses for sexism doesn't mean they won't have sexism without one.
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Feb 25, 2018 00:19
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It's almost impressive how utterly lacking in design consistency those guns are. They all look like they were made up by someone who's only had guns described to them second-hand, but no two of them look like that in the same way. I guess that means they're "hand-crafted" right megane fucked around with this message at 17:01 on Mar 4, 2018 |
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Mar 4, 2018 16:59
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Ah, good, they remembered to include the "you can play a female X, because we're progressive and fun! ...but obviously only men could REALLY be one, haha, so here's a page of reasons you should feel strange and unaccepted and expect the GM to have NPCs disrespect you if you do so," sidebar, as required by federal law.
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Mar 6, 2018 04:14
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