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Haystack
Jan 23, 2005





Count Chocula posted:

Even vanilla Wonka has too much body horror for me, but fetishes aside, 'break into body horror Wonka's factory' is a decent premise for an adventure in...something. Madlands? Mage? Vampire and it's a Tzimiche?

Esoterrorists? At least with that you get the catharsis of burning it to the ground and covering up the ashes.

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Haystack
Jan 23, 2005





It sounds like godlike commits the usual war nerd sin of only wanting to focus on the sexy, fun parts of the war.

Haystack
Jan 23, 2005





Halloween Jack posted:

What would Cenobite vitamin gummies look like? Just gobbets of torn flesh?

Can't say, no one's ever gotten them out of the packaging.

Haystack
Jan 23, 2005





The Deleter posted:

The best way to do a playable Slann would have to be a Slann sitting in their chair, staring into space, AND their entourage of temple guard and Skink handlers. So most of the work is done by a surrounding group - a Skink Priest as the face to actually talk to the party and do social stuff, and Saurus for handling combat encounters. Occasionally, once per session, the Slann blinks, twitches a finger and evaporates a guy in a cloud of magic before going back to sleep.

Ars Ribbeta

Haystack
Jan 23, 2005





It's also wildly poisonous to elves and trolls. The dwarves would have made it poison humans too, if they had realized how much trouble we would be.

Haystack
Jan 23, 2005





FMguru posted:

Chaosium published a boardgame titled CREDO which has the players compete to write the Nicene Creed. Very historically accurate, with all kinds of possible outcomes. Get the Miracles Of The Infant Jesus included in the New Testament, promote a Gnostic, Dualist, Nestorian, Monophysite, Arian, or even Pagan creed, and discover holy relics (the True Cross, amusingly, can be found multiple times). It does a great job of communicating how varied and fractious Christianity was at the beginning, and how arbitrary and political the process was for determining the settled official form of mainstream Christianity. I think it was reprinted recently.

They're actually working on a whole new edition. I mostly bring this up because the art is being done by a goon and kind of rules

Haystack
Jan 23, 2005





Dallbun posted:

I can’t… find it in the deck. :( Probably there would have been a wereboar? Does anyone else have the deck and the copious amounts of free time needed to comb through it? Failing that, just give me your best wereboar encounter.

The party encounters a nervous youth who is looking for adventurers to cast a demon out of his uncle's homestead. When pressed for details, he will reveal that the demon actually lives at the homestead and is married to the uncle's daughter. Apparently the demon hid his true nature when he first arrived seeking work as a farmhand, but demonstrated such strength and talents with farm work that the uncle quickly married his daughter to the man to help secure their fortunes. It was only later that everyone learned of the demon's tremendous gluttonous appetite, which is threatening to eat the farm into ruin. Worse, he started scaring everyone by displaying evil magics, and the last few months has locked his wrenched wife up in an outbuilding.

If the adventurers agree to help, they will find the situation much as the youth describes. The demon, who goes by Sus, appears to be a large, thickly built man with a bad attitude, glutinous habits, and great strength. In reality, the "man" is a former Solar reincarnated as a wereboar, who was cast down from Bytopia after getting drunk at a party and sexually harassing a moon goddess. If the adventurers attack him or press their investigation too far, he will flee and retrieve his +2 holy battle rake before returning and trying to drive off the party.

Haystack fucked around with this message at 20:28 on Dec 9, 2017

Haystack
Jan 23, 2005





Down With People posted:

He doesn't have one! The Church of Satan literally kicked him out for being a whackjob!

That's beautiful

Haystack
Jan 23, 2005





Freaking Crumbum posted:

i would seriously buy a novel about whatever background story greg was telling with the setting fiction in UA3.

I'm told that that's basically Last Call by Tim Powers

Haystack
Jan 23, 2005





There's been points in America's history where the christian fringes had substantial anarchistic and progressive elements to it, but that ship sailed and burned a long time ago.

Haystack
Jan 23, 2005





So what y'all are saying is that Hitler is indirectly responsible for America's busted-rear end transport system. Figures.

Haystack
Jan 23, 2005





Zeus all turning into a swan but getting really annoyed because everyone beat him to it and then some.

Haystack
Jan 23, 2005





The whole Tolkeen things reads like Kevin cargo culting pacifism into a one-size-fits-all doctrine. It's not really that uncommon of an attitude among the older-guard left, as I understand it. I suppose that this is what it looks like when taken to its extremes by a lazy centrist.

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Haystack
Jan 23, 2005





That, and a pretty literal case of not of not wanting to murder his darlings. Kevin's darling, in this case, being Nazi aesthetics.

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