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Truthkeeper
Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.


Because it's my favorite 3DS game and I like sharing stuff I enjoy with people, that's why.



Rune Factory 4 is the 6th (and final) installment (the console installments didn't get numbers) of the Rune Factory series, a spinoff of the long-running farming/dating sim series Harvest Moon, and in fact the first few games were subtitled "A Fantasy Harvest Moon". Unlike the other foray in introducing Harvest Moon to alternate genres (Innocent LIfe: A Futuristic Harvest Moon never caught on), Rune Factory developed a fair following of obsessed lunatic fanboys, like me. Building upon Harvest Moon's farming and dating sim aspects and adding robust action-RPG gameplay, it hits the players on more levels than I can count. So you know, we're talking at least three or four levels here. Sadly, despite being the best game in the series, it wasn't enough to save the developer, Neverland Co. (who you may otherwise be familiar with from the Lufia series) shut their doors shortly after the game's release. Which seems to happen pretty often to developers of games I like. I'm now accepting bribes to not enjoy games made by companies you like. On the plus side, the development team behind Rune Factory got hired immediately by Marvelous , the studio behind Harvest Moon (and publisher of this series), so they're still in business.

If you're concerned that you've never played or heard of Rune Factory in your life and can't be expected to follow the plot, I'd love to tell you that the games are all self contained like Zelda or Final Fantasy and require no knowledge of previous games. But I'd be lying, because this game acts as a semi-sequel to the first game, as well as a coda to the series as a whole. But the plot doesn't require much knowledge of the other games, and I'll summarize as needed.

Sit back, relax, and try not to let the magnificent 3d graphics (that you can't see, I have turned off, and aren't actually all that magnificent) strike you blind. And enjoy this fine, hand-crafted (by somebody else ) Youtube video of the game's opening. Animated opening videos are a thing in this series, you can get to know all the characters through half-second snippets!

Opening: Travelers of the Wind (Kaze no Torabera)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zZ5O3JpXJew

And please enjoy this amusing summary of the game inadvertantly provided by MzBundifund.

Mzbundifund posted:

The people of this town must be the most jaded unflappable collection of lunatics in the world. Today the prince's butler released a rampaging elephant in the streets while the prince ran in circles screaming about buckets. Ho hum, another ordinary Tuesday. At least tomorrow we're all getting together to literally beat the stuffing off a 5 meter tall sheep.

Contents Presented in Pleasant Table Format:

Act 1

Part 1: Here We Are, Born to be Kings, We're the Princes of the Ellipses - https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...1#post454803398

Part 2: Meet Art https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...2#post454840132

Part 3: I Swear to Ventuswill I Will Murder the Next NPC Who Starts a Ventuswilldamned Tutorial https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...2#post455002940

Part 4: Handle That Hoe https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...2#post455006191

Part 5: Amnesia is Totally a Valid Excuse to Forget All Existing Debts and Responsibilities https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...2#post455006469

Part 6: Harvest Factory: Prince Meets Prince https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...2#post455078505

Part 7: Gone Boxin’ https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...2#post455663344

Part 8: Gameplay! Sweet Blessed Gameplay! https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...2#post455929135

Part 9: A Tour of Selphia https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...2#post455952739

Part 10: Chat up Ladies, Kill Sheep https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...2#post456006128

Part 11: Meet, Greet, and Go on a Killing Spree https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...2#post456290502

Part 12: I’m Scared of Butterflies https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...2#post456977832

Part 13: Does Whatever a Butterfly Can https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...2#post457624747

Part 14: The Fertilizer Hits the Windmill https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...2#post460522910

Part 15: Beans Beans They’re Good For Your Heart https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...2#post460606780

Part 16: The More You Eat the More You Punch Things In the Face https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...2#post460754512

Part 17: Stand Clear, Venti Needs to Take an Infodump https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...2#post460823939

Part 18: Every Day is Tax Day https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...2#post460931116

Part 19: Freedom is Slavery https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...2#post460968699

Part 20: Forged in Fire https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...2#post460969927

Part 21: Foreboding Recording of Ominous Message https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...2#post461059881

Part 22: The Obligatory Monty Python Reference https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...2#post461392175

Part 23: Another Request to go to the Basement https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...2#post461524036

Part 24: For Ventuswill’s Sake, Is He Still On Namek? It’s Been Like Twelve Episodes Already! https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...0#post461914181

Part 25: Dungeon #2: The Water Ruins (Finally!) https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...8#post462149349

Part 26: Memories Light the Corners of My Mindhttps://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3759496&userid=0&perpage=40&pagenumber=8#post462753777

Part 27: Of Course, Of Course https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...8#post462924989

Part 28: We’re Ready to Believe You https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...9#post463105136

Part 29: Every Molecule in This Turnip Exploding at the Speed of Light https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...9#post463259483

Part 30: Scolly Dolly Doo, Where Are You? https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...9#post463406556

Part 31: The Plot Just Dumped a Load of Serious All Over The Place https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...9#post463626493

Part 32: Screw Leon, I Need Pets https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...0#post463640339

A Brief Interlude on Staves https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...0#post463644768

A Brief Interlude on Six Lovely Ladies https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...0#post463652999

Part 33: Screw Leon, I’m Too Busy Chasing Animals https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...0#post463679652

Part 34: Try Talking to Everybody and Going Everywhere https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...1#post463786932

Part 35: See Sign. See Sign Run. Run Sign Run https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...2#post464242190

Part 36: In Which My Human Pets Need To Level Grind https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...3#post464520728

Part 37: Sexually Insecure Cookie Day https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...3#post464709812

Part 38: The Delirium Lava Ruins https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...4#post464993246

Part 39: Act 1 Finale: The Forest of Beginnings https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...4#post465104448

Part 40: Act 1 Epilogue https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...4#post465135328

Part 41: The Epilogue to This Act is Too drat Long https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...5#post465293219

Act 2

Part 42: A Wild Plot Appears! https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...5#post465490742

Part 43: I'm The Bull Goose Prince in This Town https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...5#post465792030

Interlude: A Brief Summary of the Plot of RF1 and How It Ties into Ongoing Events https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...5#post465824289

Part 44: Sercerezo, the Land of Always Spring https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...5#post465860597

Part 45: Born to be King, We’re the Prince of the Creepy Weirdos https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...5#post466076457

Part 46: Raiders of the Lost Pendant https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...6#post466209155

Part 47: Romance and Hats https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...6#post466352236

Part 48: I Don't Care For Idra Cave https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...6#post466440786

Part 49: Stupid Sechsy Soldiers https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...6#post466508291

Part 50: All I Want for Christmas is Your Severed Head https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...6#post466927365

Part 51: Maya Road and the Demon God Dragon https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...4#post467024399

Part 52: Sechs Sechs Sechs https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...4#post467255074

A Brief Interlude: End of Year Recap https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...4#post467349306

Part 53: Back to the Grind https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...4#post467850691

Part 54: The World of Fields https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...4#post468193188

Part 55: A Shiny Distraction Appears! https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...4#post469265991

A Brief Interlude With Clorica https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...5#post469756246

Part 56: Giant Assholes From Giant Assholes https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...5#post469757633

Part 57: Pineapple Juice is Worth the End of the World https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...5#post470477009

Part 58: Hail Leon, King of the Trolls https://forums.somethingawful.com/s...5#post470542957

Truthkeeper fucked around with this message at 08:15 on Mar 21, 2017

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YOTC
Nov 17, 2005
Damn stupid newbie

I will admit to having way to many hours in this game. I think it's over 300.

Looking forward to this.

Truthkeeper
Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.


Here We Are, Born to be Kings, We're the Princes of the Ellipses



And we have Schrodinger's Protagonist. Male protagonist, default name Lest, on the left. Female protagonist, default name Frey, on the right. I'll be playing as Lest. Although I am totally secure enough in both my masculinity and sexuality to play Frey.


Shockingly the game starts on Day 1. Less shockingly, that isn't a count of how many days have passed, but the actual date. 4 month calendar, 30 days per month. Try not to think on how that applies to peoples' ages.


And this is how I open the box and collapse the gender waveform. I'd comment about the gender stereotyping of radical dude man and polite and proper woman, but I'm too busy facepalming at "I'm flyin' high, baby!" It sounds dumb, and is kind of out of character for Lest.




Whether 'god' is in quotes because Lest is an atheist or because he wants to emphasize the godliness (and therefore cleanliness) of Selphia's god is up for debate.



Our hero, clad in all white, and some nameless NPCs in black.



Lest: Excuse me, how close are we to Selphia?

Joyous Captain: Oh, we're almost there.

Joyful Captain: Are you settin' out to do a bit o' sightseeing?



Joyful Captain:It's a real nice town.

Joyful Captain:Beautiful air and scenery, an' got a great atmosphere.

Joyful Captain:You can feel the protection o' the god when you're standin' on them roads

Joyful Captain:You'll enjoy your stay for sure.

Are you being paid extra to advertise for the town Captain? (The answer is yes, because I'll be the one paying him to do it later)

Lest: ...

Lest: ...I hope so.



Our villains for this intro, clad in those barrels off to the left of Lest.



???: (...By the way, what are we doing?)



???: (Well you always get mad when I ask...)

???: (WHAT?!)

???: (N-nothing!)



That person. Because Lest doesn't have a name until I get to the name screen. I'm told these pronoun games don't sound nearly as silly in Japanese, maybe that's why they're more common in JRPGs.

???: (Over there. See?)



???: (Look through the hole dumbass!)

???: (Oh yeah!)


Batman? Itachi Uchiha? The man in black? I'm going with the man in black. Lest kinda sounds like Westley.

???: (We're going to make our move. Are you ready?)

???: (Yes sir!)



Lest: Huh?!

Soldier: We're taking over this ship now!


His name is Gangster Soldier. His boss is Soldier. Either we just took a swerve into Final Fantasy 7, or else these aren't exactly major villains we're dealing with here.

Soldier: If you don't wanna get hurt, do what we say!

Soldier: Got it?






Yeah, the thing! You know, the whatchamacallit! The thingamajig? Seriously, now they're just doing it for a big reveal later in the game and it isn't worth the awkward dialogue here at all.

Lest: H-how do you know about that...?


No, seriously, that's actually a very good question. Soldier's answer is technically correct, which is of course the best kind of correct, but still stupid.



Lest: ...This gift is very important.




Yeah, he's trained a lot! That's why his combat skills are all 1 out of 99!

Lest: First I press [L] to open the L pocket


That is pretty much it in a nutshell. Press (B) to swing sword. With higher skill level comes fancier moves, and I'll pick up magic and skills as I play, but for now, press button to sword.

Lest: You wanna fight, huh? Fine! Let's do this!


The equip menu, opened with the L button. If I had more than one item in my inventory, I could cycle through tabs for equipment, magic, and everything else. But when all you have is a broadsword, every problem looks like Gangster Soldier.


Good thing Lest has superhuman strength and can knock people into the air with his sword. I assume it's possible to lose this fight, if you tried to tank swords with your face without attacking back or something.


They're clearly dead, because they're lying on the ground. Enemies totally leave corpses in RPGs, right?





Soldier: Hmph. Not so fast!

Not pictured, Soldier actually hitting Lest, because I missed grabbing the shot.


And then our hero died and Gangster Soldier became the new protagonist.



Or, you know, not. It's not that it's impossible to knock somebody out with a sword, I just can't see why Soldier would bother.

Soldier: Finally!



The byplay between these guys could have been amusing if they had been recurring villains. I like to think they went on to have many exciting adventures after this.


The thing you clearly saw him drop after you hit him? I mean yes he was behind Lest when he got up and couldn't see what Lest was holding, but he should have seen the obvious glowing poo poo falling over the side of the ship.

Soldier: Or else!

Lest: Huh?



Rune Factory turned amnesiac protagonists into a running gag. All of the numbered games have protagonists with amnesia, and this is the first one where you get to play before they lose their memories. For a given value of playing, I guess. According to Rune Factory, developing amnesia causes a person to have a strong desire to move to a small rural town and become a farmer. Which I suppose is better than becoming a serial killer targeting guys named John.





Soldier: WHATEVER! Just do what I say!

Gangster Soldier: Such a tyrant...




Soldier: Hey! Are you trying to play dumb with us?

Lest: No... um... I, I really don't know--




Solider: You...!

Gangster Soldier: Sir, sir!



I question Gangster Soldier's medical credentials. I also quesiton his soldier credentials. I'm not even sure he's a real gangster. This game is a terrible web of deceit and lies!

Soldier: Are you saying a little blow to the head like that caused amnesia?!

Gangster Soldier: Sir! I don't know, sir! But maybe?

Lest: ...Um.

Lest: ...Perhaps, um... it IS amnesia?


I'd say it's not the first time, but this is actually the only time in the series we see the protagonist lose their memory, so who can say?

Gangster Soldier: You shouldn't cry over spilled milk sir.

Soldier: I know that!

Soldier: Dammit...

Soldier: No, wait a minute.


It probably would fool Gangster Soldier if he was faking.

Lest: Huh?!

Gangster Solider: Oh. good point, sir!

Solider: All right.



Gangster Soldier: Understood, sir!

Lest: What?!


That's my bathing suit area!





There's charmingly clueless villains, and then there's this guy who I'm surprised remembers to breathe without instructions.

Soldier: YOU...!

Soldier: Just use the altitude, dammit!



Gangster Soldier: Oh, like this?





Well, that would be scary enough to make me tell them anything they wanted to know.


If Soldier wasn't such a lazy bastard and had handled the interrogation himself, this game never would have happened. Thanks Soldier!



So to recap... no, there's no time, let me sum up. Lest got kicked off the side of an airship, fell a long way, through a hole in the roof of a large building. So unless there's a really soft landing in there, he's dead.


But ignore that, because we have another character, a dragon, one with a name! Eventually! (Her name is Ventuswill)

Ventuswill: Dear me...
Ventuswill: What should I do?




Do dragons count as soft things to land on? I don't think they do. Lest should be dead now.


The dragon should also be dead.

Ventuswill: What the heck?!
Ventuswill: Did someone just fall from the sky.
Ventuswill: A p-person...?

Yes, someone tends to imply person.


Well, if he isn't, I guess that's a free lunch, right?

Ventuswill: ...
Ventuswill: H-hello?
Ventuswill: You aren't dead, are you?

Lest: Owww...

Everyone knows you have to answer when somebody asks you if you're dead.

Ventuswill: Whoa!



Lest: ...Barely...

Ventuswill: Are you injured?

Lest: Well...


I don't believe him, I think he's fishing for a lawsuit.

Lest: But that's all.

Ventuswill: Only back pain after falling from the heavens?


That could have been the lead-in to a really bad human-on-dragon hentai doujin. And now that I've mentioned it it probably exists.

Lest: ...?

Keep in mind they're both identified as ??? at this point, and the textbox doesn't always indicate who's speaking. This conversation is more confusing than it has to be.

Ventuswill: What is it?

Lest: ...A talking... dragon...?

As opposed to all the non-talking dragons I'm sure he remembers being familiar with. You know, because he doesn't have amnesia or anything.

Ventuswill: Huh?!



Up to this point, Ventuswill has been speaking with a girly feminine voice, but this line and those after it are unvoiced, but instead have a deep rumbling sound, clearly indicating that she sounds like a giant fuckmothering dragon when she wants to. It's a nice touch.





Lest: ...Me...?


And we have another character! Volkanon, the mightiest butler in the world!

Volkanon: What in the world was that noise I just heard?!
Volkanon: Egads! Who is this knave?!

Ventuswill: Wait, Volkanon.

Volkanon: B-but...



Lest: Well...



The character name screen seems like a natural stopping point. I'm accepting suggestions for names, up to six letters (six letter names, when did this turn into a SNES game?). I reserve the right to veto anything obscene. Also anything I don't like. Silly names are okay, I totally went through my last playthrough playing Jojo of the Joestar Farm (he was a fist weapon specialist).

Assuming nobody posts anything at all, I'll just go with Lest.

Truthkeeper fucked around with this message at 04:12 on Jan 11, 2016

Deformed Church
May 12, 2012

5'5", IQ 81




Oh yes. Can I look forward to you digging deep into the endgame? It gets really frustrating to force myself into after a certain point, and kind of drained my will to keep playing it.

FicusArt
Dec 27, 2014

Why would I draw dudes when I could be drawing literally anything else?


Can you just make his name whatever it really was pre amnesia?

HenryEx
Mar 24, 2009

...your cybernetic implants, the only beauty in that meat you call "a body"...


Grimey Drawer

Call him Arthur.


Trust me.

Deformed Church
May 12, 2012

5'5", IQ 81




HenryEx posted:

Call him Arthur.

Oh yeah do this.

Tarezax
Sep 12, 2009

MORT cancels dance: interrupted by MORT


Yeah, Japanese doesn't use gendered pronouns very often if at all, so when things are localized it's often a matter of guessing what gender they're referring to in the dialogue or ending up with some awkward phrasing in service of preserving the neutrality.

I played the poo poo out of Friends of Mineral Town in middle school, but never took a crack at the Rune Factory series. I'm looking forward to this!

megamariox
Jun 4, 2011


Going to say go with Arthur as well. Seeing this makes me want to play my copy again.

EponymousMrYar
Jan 4, 2015

The enemy of my enemy is my enemy.


Very interested in this too. Only managed to snag the first game and even then it's slow pacing's kept me back from finishing it (or maybe I'm just a big babby when it comes to spelunking the dungeon.)

Totally name him Arthur. If this is as true to Harvest Moon as I think it is, I foresee lake ladies in our future.

Truthkeeper
Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.


Volkanon: Now, Lord Arthur, allow me to show you to your room.

Arthur: Arthur?

Volkanon: Yes. I heard that the name of the prince is Arthur. ...Hmm? But if that's the case, why would you call yourself by another name?

There, we got the stupid name gag out of the way, can we please skip naming him Arthur now? Although Lest would and in fact does make a much better Arthur than the actual Arthur in this game.

Oh what the hell, Arthur accepted!

Truthkeeper
Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.


Meet Art


So Lest changed his name to Art, for the sake of not confusing me later in conversations involving or about the other character in this game named Arthur.




Art: Well... um... that's the best I can do, I'm afraid. I can't remember anything else besides my own name.

Volkanon: Oh my!

Ventuswill: You speak the truth?

Art: Yes, Ma'am.

Ventuswill: ...I see honesty in your eyes. But amnesia...!




Volkanon's schtick, besides being loving badass, is that he'll cry manly tears at the drop of a hat. And he's a hugger. We choose to allow this. We are a merciful and just ruler.

Volkanon: But rest assured! I-I'll always be on your side!

He'll always be on my side, but won't be a party member until the postgame. Such is life.

Volkanon, being a manly hugger, takes this opportunity to hug Art. Art, being small and squishy, doesn't take it well.

Art: Err... I can't... breathe...

Volkanon: Oh! Wait a minute! Perhaps you're the Prince we've been waiting for!

The Prince of the Universe? The Farmer Formerly Known As Prince? The Prince Who Was Promised?

Ventuswill: Hmm...


Flattery isn't getting you into my pants dragon. Dinner and a movie first.

Ventuswill: You must have lost your memory from the shock of the fall. Do you have any idea how or why you came to drop in from above?

Art: Well, you see...

There was this idiot, and these other idiots. We kept running into idiots

Cut to after Art explains what just happened to him.



No you didn't. You were too busy making sure the man who magically survived falling out of the sky wasn't dead and then telling him he's a prince.

Volkanon: They must be villains chasing after the prince!

Ventuswill: You're right. This can't be a coincidence. Volkanon.

Volkanon: Yes, Ma'am?

Ventuswill: Prepare a room for the prince.


The man enjoys his work. Volkanon's voice clips don't have a British accent, but I still like to give him one in my head, for he is the mightiest butler in all the land.


[/i]This was the first clear shot I managed to get of Ventuswill (before I remembered there's a button to hide textboxes). We are dealing with one seriously large dragon, possibly even one in charge.[/i]

quote:

VENTUSWILL, THE DIVINE WIND
Voice: Wendee Lee

Dragon God of the Wind and Time

One of the four Native Dragons, the gods of this world, Ventuswill sits in guardianship over the kingdom of Norad, harboring close ties to the royal family (and therefore should know drat well that Art isn't the prince). Centuries old and more than a little kooky, she lives in a fancy castle in the center of the village of Selphia, and rules the village with an iron, yet caring, fist.

Her favorite gifts are golden vegetables and pancakes. The former are unavilable until much later in the game and require great effort to grow, while the latter require a fair number of ingredients and a middling cooking score. In a pinch, she's perfectly happy with any cooked dish or crop. Her most hated gift is one of her own teeth, obtained from fighting her in the bonus dungeon.

Art: E-excuse me!
Art: Do you mean, a room for me!

I demand the penthouse! And I want a jacuzzi, and a bowl of M&Ms with all the red ones taken out!

Ventuswill: Of course.

Art: But I didn't fall down with the intent to say here...

He's a Rune Factory protagonist, so losing his memory should have caused him to immediately home in on the nearest small down with a farm for him to run. His staying here was inevitable.

Ventuswill: No doubt.

Art: Huh?


Technically fell through a gigantic hole in the roof and into your even more gigantic rear end. Said no man who wants to not be eaten alive.



Ventuswill: You are here because you were meant to be here.

Art: B-but...


You will live in this town you've never been to before surrounded by people you've never met, and assemble all the clues to discover who you are!

Ventuswill: It seems the most logical course of action, wouldn't you agree?

No, no I would not. See my previous sarcastic rephrasing of your dumb idea.

Art: I'm not sure I would call that logical, but... Are you sure I can stay?

Ventuswill: Most certainly.

Art: ...Thank you very much.

I guess it is better to not be both amnesiac and homeless.

Ventuswill: There's no need for that. However... I hope in addition to your own personal details, you've also forgotten... the tone of voice I used earlier.

Art: Earlier...? What do you mean?



Like I said before, Ventuswill started out speaking informally with a girly voice (voiced by veteran voice actress Wendee Lee, doing what sounds to me like her Haruhi voice, although I readiy admit to having a terrible ear for this sort of thing. Art is voiced by Bryce Papenbrook, who I'm not familiar with but his a decent handful of anime roles under his belt). When she introduced herself, the voice acting was replaced with roaring, which is how she's spoken since, and is only now returning to the girly voice. I'll try to point out her switching from one voice to the other as needed. drat this non-audio medium!

Art: Oh. You do sound a little different, come to think of it. A little more... arrogant, I guess? Sorry.

Art apologizes to people often enough that he has a voice clip for it.

Ventuswill: Tsk! So you do remember...

Try hitting him on the head again. It'll either cure him or give him amnesia about this too.

Art: Did you just... click your tongue derisively?!

I'm not prepared to argue for or against dragon biology in which tongue clicking is possible. We've already accepted the talking flying lizard with a fifty foot wingspan.

Ventuswill sighs.

Ventuswill: If you've heard the other side of me, I suppose there's nothing I can do about it. Oh well...

Art: Erm... Lady Ventuswill?


Gladly, much less typing for me that way. Feel free to insert your own Starbucks joke here.

Art: Venti?

Venti: Sure, why not? At this point, I don't care if you address me with respect. That ship has sailed! Furthermore, stop speaking so politely. It makes me rather uncomfortable.



Art: Hmm...

Venti: ...

Art: Yes, M--

Venti: ...

Art: O-okay.

Venti: Good.

And that is how Art did not become lunch that day

Venti: Now listen! This is important! Do not let anyone else know about this, all right?

Art: ...About what?


Nobody would ever take an informal dragon seriously, she'd have to start torching villages just to keep the peasants in line.

Art: Oho, so you're keeping that se--



Art: Y-yes, M--V-Venti...

Good thing Art wore his brown pants today.

Venti: Hmph!

Volkanon runs back in, presumably his super butler hearing alerted him that Venti was yelling at somebody and he came in to clean up the mess. But with no messy corpse to dispose of, he provides an alternate reason.

Volkanon: Lady Ventuswill, the room is now ready.

Ventuswill: Well done. Your body must ache. Rest early today, Prince.

Volkanon: Now, Lord Arthur, allow me to show you do your room.

Art: Arthur?

Volkanon: Yes. I heard that the name of the Prince is Arthur.

There are lots of princes in Norad, the king really gets around I guess. One of them is a traveling salesman, another is a protagonist in a game that isn't as good as this one.

Volkanon: ...Hmm?


That's the whole reason that guy wanted me to pick Arthur for a name. It isn't worth it, and i like Art better anyway.

Art: Um... Am I really... a Prince...?
As long as it doesn't involve sword fighting impossibly bishounen teenagers, I see no reason why not

Volkanon: ...I see. Even the one thing you thought you remembered... it must be tough.

Art: Oh no, that's not what I'm saying...

Volkanon: It's only natural you'd be a bit bewildered. I think it's best that you turn in early today.

Art: But...


And if you aren't you'll be quickly executed for impersonating royalty. Vive le roi!

Art: But I haven't forgotten. My name is Art.

Ventuswill: Hmm... Art... That's a rather fun name. You may use that name for now if you wish.

Art: But I'm telling you--

Ventuswill: I'll leave the rest to you Volkanon.

Volkanon: Of course. Now Prince, let us go!



Volkanon goes off, but before Art can follow him...

Ventuswill: Art.

Art: Yes?

Ventuswill: Don't forget about the promise we made earlier.

Art: What promise?




Art: Oh, okay. I remember now.

Really starting to think Gangster Soldier would have been a less stupid protagonist. Then again, Art has literal brain damage, we should cut him some slack, and maybe get him to a loving doctor.

Venti: Honestly... How could I have slipped up so bad...? Be sure you keep that promise. Or else!

Art: O-okay... I will!

At long last, we get out of Ventuswill's throne room/cave/secret love nest and follow Volkanon to Art's bedroom/secret love nest.



Volkanon: Allow me to explain your housing arrangements. Please follow me.



I could, but this is my first chance to show off the interface.

quote:

Nothing too non-standard, meters in top left, equipped weapon and spells/skills in bottom right. Meters are HP, which work as per usual, and RP (Rune Points). Rune points are the fuel for every action, every sword swing (that hits something), spell cast, watered crops, hammered rocks, all of them consume RP. If I run out of RP, those actions will consume HP, and I will loving die take an expensive trip to the local doctor's office.

I have two slots to equip spells and skills, on X and Y buttons. I can unlock two more slots R+X and R+Y later. Right now I only have the Escape spell, which is free, teleports me to the entrance of a dungeon if I'm in one, or otherwise teleports me back to the village, or to my bedroom if I'm in the village. This spell is so useful I don't need to equip it, there's a big blue button for it on the touch screen.

The touchscreen is mostly filled with my map, which currently shows my bedroom area . The Escape spell is on the bottom left, on the right are buttons for opening my inventory and my quest log. At the top are the date and time and my current funds (200G, we will assume a G is a solid gold coin with Venti's face stamped on it, because it amuses me).

Aside from the interface, the whole room is mostly visible from here. There are exits west, back to Venti's room, northwest, to the basement, where I can check my achievements, scores in various contests, change the difficulty to hard mode (which I will do), and view an art gallery. The bonus dungeon will also appear there later.

There's an exit to the farm to the north, and two exits south. One leads to the town square, the other to my personal shop in the town square, where I will eventually be able to try and trick tourists into paying me vastly inflated prices for my items. It's a decent money maker in the early game, but takes time and RP.

Volkanon insists on showing me my diary, where I can save my game, and my bed, which he "But thou must!"s me into sleeping in. He won't leave the room until I go to bed, little creepy. Little creepy.

Glazius
Jul 22, 2007

Hail all those who are able,
any mouse can,
any mouse will,
but the Guard prevail.



Clapping Larry

Good lord these are still the poshest of beginnings. How on earth are we going to get all motivated to grow the gently caress out of some turnips if we're in the lap of luxury and also dragon?

EponymousMrYar
Jan 4, 2015

The enemy of my enemy is my enemy.


Clearly we are a man of action and sitting around all day in the lap of luxury would be boring!

Also it would be rude to take advantage of our hospitality and that might be an issue considering our host is a dragon.

The Lone Badger
Sep 24, 2007



Glazius posted:

Good lord these are still the poshest of beginnings. How on earth are we going to get all motivated to grow the gently caress out of some turnips if we're in the lap of luxury and also dragon?

Umm... dragon.

Being somewhere where there isn't a dragon in our immediate vicinity should become a priority.

Rigged Death Trap
Feb 13, 2012

BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP



You might want to use small portraits for dialogue.
Ala:
: Yeah gonna farm the poo poo outta some turnips

It help tons for readability.

Rigged Death Trap fucked around with this message at 16:15 on Jan 13, 2016

Zanzibar Ham
Mar 17, 2009

You giving me the cold shoulder? How cruel.




Grimey Drawer

Wow, Volckanon has really changed since he gave up godhood.

Geomancing
Jan 8, 2004

I am not an egghead. I am well-read.


I'm looking forward to this. Honestly, I couldn't get into the game very far. It didn't grab my interest, though it is the first of the Harvest Moon / Rune Factory series I've played.

Lunar Suite
Jun 5, 2011

If you love a flower which happens to be on a star, it is sweet at night to gaze at the sky. All the stars are a riot of flowers.


The earlier Rune Factories always disappointed me a bit - there was always something not quite there about them, something unfinished.

Not here! No more walking forever to craft stuff, no more long, uninterruptible animations to gather runeys... 4 does it well, 4 does it right.
And 4 is self-aware - the dialogue is honestly pretty good, and the characters interesting. 4 made me laugh.

Tarezax
Sep 12, 2009

MORT cancels dance: interrupted by MORT


I think I know which way the wind is blowing

when can we marry the dragon

Truthkeeper
Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.


Tarezax posted:

I think I know which way the wind is blowing

when can we marry the dragon

I totally would have if it was an option. Rumor has it that a Venti marriage option was nixed from the game during production. Leaving this as the only main line RF where the girl they spend the whole game throwing at you isn't actually an available marriage candidate.

EDIT: In retrospect, I really should have just done all these tutorial posts as a single update. But finally, honest to Venti gameplay incoming. I swear I spend more time waiting for screenshots to convert than I do playing the game, but it's better than having none at all. From here on out, I'm paraphrasing the tutorials to spend more time playing the drat game.

Truthkeeper fucked around with this message at 07:05 on Jan 14, 2016

Tarezax
Sep 12, 2009

MORT cancels dance: interrupted by MORT


Truthkeeper posted:

I totally would have if it was an option. Rumor has it that a Venti marriage option was nixed from the game during production. Leaving this as the only main line RF where the girl they spend the whole game throwing at you isn't actually an available marriage candidate.

EDIT: In retrospect, I really should have just done all these tutorial posts as a single update. But finally, honest to Venti gameplay incoming. I swear I spend more time waiting for screenshots to convert than I do playing the game, but it's better than having none at all. From here on out, I'm paraphrasing the tutorials to spend more time playing the drat game.

That's disappointing, I expect more from my anime waifu games.

Truthkeeper
Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.


I Swear to Ventuswill I Will Murder the Next NPC Who Starts a Damned Tutorial

So after falling asleep under Volkanon's creepy yet watchful eye, Art had to eventually wake up.





This room clearly needs lockable doors. Or any doors at all.


All available marriage candidates, regardless of gender, get a quick little animated cutscene to introduce them and flag them as a potential mate. Here we have our first girl, Clorica.



Probably not the royal concubine then.

quote:

Clorica
Voice: Heather Hogan

Butler-in-Training

Clorica, a sweet, yet narcoleptic girl. This girl falls asleep in the middle of anything and everything, and is capable of doing her tasks around the castle while napping. Such powers of sleepwalking are to be admired. When awake, she has difficulty being decisive about anything, at all. I don't particularly like or dislike her, beyond finding her kind of dull. Her favorite gift is apple pie, but tea, vegetables, and shiny rocks will all do in a pinch.

In battle, Clorica wields spears fairly well. casts low level healing spells and status recovery spells, can throw random food to me if I don't already have a food buff, and can fall asleep mid-battle. Not an optimal choice, but not terrible either.



Um, excuse me? Are you awake?



Her little eye rub here is admittedly adorable, and I like the level of detail they went into on these sprites..



Uh, good morning.

How can you sleep standing there?

I don't really know myself.

Hmm... I think I came in here for something

Oh dear. What was it?

Ah! That's right.



This is the main task performed by Clorica and her spear counterpart Vishnal. One or the other will show up in the morning to provide a wakeup call. I could specify that I want one or the other if I had a particular preference, or even disable them altogether.

Are you awake yet?

...Yes.

Oh, good. Good morning, then. And I'm pleased to meet you.

My name is Clorica. I'm a butler in training.

I'm Art.

And I'm the loving prince.

Oh? How strange...



Oh, uh...

No, my name is definitely Art.

I'd rather you call me that.

As you wish, Art.



So my name is both fun and pleasant-dream-y. Note a distinct lack of manly.



Assume that I've already bitten my tongue regarding every bit of sexual innuendo I could have put into this commentary. Just because my jokes are tasteless doesn't mean I can't have some loving decorum.

Thank you very much.

Oh. Here.

I made some breakfast. Please have some, if you'd like.

"If I'd like", she says. This is the eating tutorial, and I'm not allowed to say no. Besides, it's loving pie. You know who refuses apple pie? Godless Unamerican Communists!



Apple pie... Always been a favorite of mine too.

Thank you!

You're very welcome!

And so Art ate of the pie, and it was good. And would have restored all of his health and RP if they weren't already full, so this was really wasteful.

That was delicious!

I'm so glad!

Eat one meal a day and you'll become stronger and stronger.

quote:

Not just good advice, but literal truth. Art has an eating skill that slowly increases from the first item eaten each day. Every skill, even the stupid ones like eating, sleeping, walking, and bathing, gives stat boosts as it increases. This is why I make an effort to level up all weapon and magic skills even though I tend to stick to just one or two for any given playthrough.

So don't forget to eat every day!

I'll be taking my leave now.

Shouldn't she wait until I give her permission to leave? I've never interacted with a butler before, but I'm fairly certain this is the case.

Oh, but one last thing before I go!

Art...

Once you're fully awake, go outside using that back door.

There's a field out there.

And you're going to learn how to till it!

Terrable, Fiersome, and Aquticus, I pray to thee oh mighty dragon gods, fly down and smite these loving unskippable tutorials.

Me?

Till a field?

But I might get dirt under my fingernails!

That's right!

Lady Ventuswill left very specific instructions.



There's your answer, the prince has to farm because Ventuswill's a drat dirty Communist. What the hell work is she doing that she's allowed to eat? Don't question the party leader unless you want to be sent to the gulag.

Well...

I am, supposedly, a Prince, right?

Oh sure, trying to use your royal status you don't believe you have to get out of hard work. Art, you're a slacker!

That's right!

...So a Prince is going to till the field?

Of course. Who else would?

I dunno, who took care of this field before Art showed up? Are you telling me Ventuswill ordered a farm to be built just on the off chance an amnesiac fell out of the loving sky and she could con him into running the place for her?

I thought a Prince was supposed to have more of an elegant lifestyle.



Clorica has no time for your poo poo excuses slacker.

...

According to Lady Ventuswill...

...you're perfectly suited to tilling soil.

However; you're loving useless at watering plants, and will quickly be replaced by a trained monkey.

What does that even mean?

I'm not sure...



Go right ahead Art. The fresh air will do you some good, and who doesn't like some down-home country living out on the... farm...



This isn't a field. This is a vacant lot full of crap.

EponymousMrYar
Jan 4, 2015

The enemy of my enemy is my enemy.


It begins

Soon the turnips/potatoes shall blot out the sun!

Annointed
Mar 2, 2013



Good old home. Ah the memories of having to transform a poo poo lot into a 4 crop rotation

Truthkeeper
Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.


Handle That Hoe

The rest of today's tutorials focus on farming and princing. Here to teach me how to farm is Vishnal, a eligible bachelor for the female player.



That's... only a little creepy looking.

quote:

Vishnal
Voice: Vic Mignogna

Butler-in-Training

The man of a thousand anime voices there, and hell if I can place this one as being like any of the others. I'll let somebody with a better ear for voices than mine figure that one out. Vishnal is the red to Clorica's blue, hot-blooded and passionate where she's calm and controlled, a man of action to her narcolepsy... and hopelessly incompetent to her doing work in her sleep. It's not that Vishnal's really bad at his job... he's just really bad at his job. But he aspires to greatness, seeking to emulate his idol, the god of butlers, MR. VOLKANON! Vishnal is amusing, but I wouldn't have tapped that with a ten foot pole during my Frey playthrough.

In battle, Vishnal has the same healing spells as Clorica, but uses double swords. He can't throw food either, but doesn't fall asleep. About as middle of the road as Clorica.



You are the Prince, right?

Nope, sorry, he just left town. I'm the new farmer, my name's MacDonald..

I've been waiting for you, Prince!!

I swear to Ventuswill if he starts humping my leg...

W-w-wait.

I still may or may not be a Prince.

So will you just call me Art?

Huh?

Please?

...I see.

Art...



Fun, pleasant-dream-y, and splendid. Pretty nice name, huh?

Please allow me to formally introduce myself. Ahem!

Good morning to you! My name is Vishnal!

I am training here to be a full-fledged butler!

Although at times I may cause you trouble...

...I am honored to serve you Art!!

Nice meeting you.










When did Volkanon get here?







Again, just like eating, increasing my various farming skills will increase my stats.






Those runes will recharge my RP and increase a skill by enough XP to be worth a whole level most of the time. Sometimes it'll be a rueny spirit instead, those give direct stat boosts. Farming, it's sort of the mechanic the whole game is built around.

Runes?

Oh, right! I forgot that you lost your memory...

My apologies.

Runes are... the life energy of anything and everything organic in this world.

In this case, what you may see are crystallized forms of runes overflowing from the crops.

Runes have been a staple mechanic of this series from the beginning, a Rune Factory is a farm run in such a way that it produces lots of runes. I think this is the first time they ever tried to explain how the gently caress it works.

So farm with love, and your crops will undoubtedly be brimming with runes.

Now about the field...

...It seems to be... covered in weeds.

And rocks. And tree stumps. And probably beer bottles. Seriously, vacant lot.

Quite.

It's been this way since the last typhoon.

But I'm sure with a bit of elbow grease, you'll be able to fix it up in no time!

Well, no, a lot of this is going to require specialized tools. I can't quite rip tree stumps out of the ground with my bare hands. This is one of those situations where the two forms of gameplay don't synchronize well, I can't clear the field with fire spells or water crops with water spells.



Yeah, no, this isn't my bag. I've got a sword, I think my future is in becoming a highwayman.

Now, now, don't try to deny it.

Lady Ventuswill told me all about it.

She said you have an exceptional talent for farming.



She also says I'm royalty, and refuses to feed me if I don't slave away on this farm for her. Actually, I don't think she ever gives me any food at all! Unless I'm committing to work here for the rest of my life in exchange for that pie Clorica gave me.

Now let me explain to you how the crops are actually grown.

In short, clear crap off the field, hoe the ground (the farm is divided into 72 tillable squares in a 6x12 rectangle), plant seed, water crop. Repeat endlessly. This is one of the two basic formulas that have sustained a moderately popular video game series for 20 years and spawned one moderately successful spin-off (the less said about Innocent Life, the better). When I try to do this in real life, my vegetables often live just long enough to be devoured by the local wildlife.



End result. Some wet dirt. In real life, if you can see the seeds like this after planting them, you hosed up.



Yeah, context is everything. The other formula, of course, is pitching woo talking right and getting into the pants of that person of your preferred gender.

But never Volkanon. His pants are inaccessible. Clearly this is why Venti isn't eligible for a relationship, she has no pants to get into.

Having endured Vishnal's spiel on the nature of growing turnips, I get to name the farm.

Lastly, it's time to name this farm.

Does this really qualify as a farm?

Absolutely!

No, absolutely not. It's still the vacant lot, with a turnip plant in one corner, behind the castle. There's probably a liquor store on one side and a check cashing place on the other, and a really shady gold buying place over yonder.

By building MOnster Barns and befriending your livestock...

... you can collect their milk and shear their wool. It will be a true farmland in due time!

Milk, wool, and other, less savory animal products. By the time this is over, I will be enslaving demons so I can collect their blood. Also, lots of bees, for the absolutely abusrd amounts of honey I go through in the end game.

Wow...

You can also have the monsters help you with your farm work.

This used to be really complicated, with some monsters being able to water crops, and some harvest, and some not being able to work but being able to fight, or be used as transportation. Now every monster can be used for every task. Look forward to dragon riding in the dark times to come.

Now, please think of a name!

Given that Art is short for Arthur, I went with the obvious choice.





I think I need an adult.


I am an adult!!

Truthkeeper fucked around with this message at 08:37 on Jan 15, 2016

Andou
Jun 12, 2014


One of the few games I enjoyed playing on the 3DS. I look forward to watching you manage your farms and skills, because I was kind of bad at it till late game.

Zanzibar Ham
Mar 17, 2009

You giving me the cold shoulder? How cruel.




Grimey Drawer

It's nice that the first bachelorette doesn't look like a little girl. Hopefully this trend continues, because that was my biggest problem with the Rune Factory I had (I think 3, the one where you're some sheepy monster man).

Truthkeeper
Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.


Zanzibar Ham posted:

It's nice that the first bachelorette doesn't look like a little girl. Hopefully this trend continues, because that was my biggest problem with the Rune Factory I had (I think 3, the one where you're some sheepy monster man).

Only one in this game. And I honestly feel like a pedophile any time I try to romance her. It's too loving creepy.

Truthkeeper
Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.


One more very short update tonight.

Amnesia is Totally a Valid Excuse to Forget All Existing Debts and Responsibilities



Turnip seeds! It would make the tutorial worth it, except I can trip over bags of these almost anywhere. Also, they're dirt cheap.

You can buy seeds at the general store.

So if you'd like to grow more crops, that's the place to visit.

The selection is extremely limited at this point, but unlike other RF/HM games, not limited by season.

Ah, and by the way...

Lady Ventuswill was calling you.

The tutorial session thankfully ends with a summons from Ventuswill.



Good morning to you.

How goes the farm work?



Because you have the talent of an Earthmate.

I, the player, know this because he's a Rune Factory protagonist, and they're all Earthmates (except maybe Micah from RF3, he was just the product of bestiality). Venti knows this because... fuckmothering dragon god king.

Earthmate?




As an Earthmate, Art has an deep connection to all living things that enables him to murder the gently caress out of monsters and grow awesome poo poo better than normal people. Clearly this is why he's fit to rule.

...That bump on the head must've messed with you far more than expected if you've forgotten THAT!

Brain damage is no joke Venti, and I resent your mockery of Art's terrible mmisfortune! That's my job.

Well, let's do an experiment.

Come closer.

Okay.

What are we doing?

Breakfast, obviously.

Perhaps I can bring your memory back wiht my power.

Really?!

Really.

...Well, really-ISH, anyway. I can't guarantee anything.

Experiment, perhaps, really-ish, no guarantees. Sign me the gently caress up and drat the consequences!

Let's try it!

I mean, please, let me try!

Please?

All right, all right.

Come then, let's go!



Maybe this would have been a better place for the "I need an adult" joke.

Well?

...Hmm...

It's... not working...

So... it doesn't work, then, after all...

I can't bring back memory unless I'm involved in it.

That's... oddly specific.

...Why don't you just give up?

Because, if you;re right, I'm loving royalty and thus likely have responsibilities and poo poo I'm supposed to be doing? ANd if you're wrong I probably still do? For all Venti knows Art has a wife and kids somewhere wondering where Papa is.

How could I possibly do that?!

We at least know that you're a Prince.

So you mustn't worry.

Oh, good, as long as we know THAT.

How about you go out and do some meet-and-greet with the locals?

Someone might recognize your face.

Because, you know, the dragon king god doesn't recognize you, but Joe down the street totally bought a car from you on Ventislist that one time.

Oh, that's true!

I'll do that right now!

Naturally, Art meets the entire population of Selphia in seconds through the power of MONTAGE.






Well?

It didn't work...

I see. I'm very sorry.

But don't be disappointed.

There's still a chance that you're the Prince.

A chance. She was so sure before.

You can write a letter to the royal capital to confirm.

And if all else fails...

...you can always start a new life here.

It's not that easy.

Yeah, it's not like somebody just handed you a home and a job the day you got here or anything. Tell me more about how hard your life is Art.

I know. But I'm very serious, and I think in time, you too may find it the best course of action.

Huh?



So there's no need to worry.

Cheer up!

Venti...

Reinbach
Jan 28, 2009


I have been blindly playing this for a long time now in my very limited free time. Very interested in learning more about the mechanics of the game.

Kallev
Nov 15, 2014


Reinbach posted:

I have been blindly playing this for a long time now in my very limited free time. Very interested in learning more about the mechanics of the game.

Smith-work can get unbearably if you try to really master it. Just aim for big numbers really, it is a simpler way of living.

Deformed Church
May 12, 2012

5'5", IQ 81




Yeah, I looked up how to up my stats a bit when I couldn't craft anything much new at that moment, and just glazed over the moment I opened a gamefaqs thread on the subject.

Lunar Suite
Jun 5, 2011

If you love a flower which happens to be on a star, it is sweet at night to gaze at the sky. All the stars are a riot of flowers.


Do they still have that double standard where you can have a lesbian marriage friendship ceremony playing as a girl with a bachelorette, but still no gay marriage?

hopeandjoy
Nov 28, 2014





Lunar Suite posted:

Do they still have that double standard where you can have a lesbian marriage friendship ceremony playing as a girl with a bachelorette, but still no gay marriage?

No game other than DS Cute (really, DS For Girl as it was 80% dummied out of the English version) has had that option directly.

I believe in this game there's a point where you can change your model and sprite to the opposite gender's while retaining your original PC's marriage candidates, like how A New Beginning and Story of Seasons allows you to freely crossdress.

But otherwise, no marriage equality in Harvest Moon.

Boneless Jogger
Apr 20, 2010


hopeandjoy posted:

No game other than DS Cute (really, DS For Girl as it was 80% dummied out of the English version) has had that option directly.

I believe in this game there's a point where you can change your model and sprite to the opposite gender's while retaining your original PC's marriage candidates, like how A New Beginning and Story of Seasons allows you to freely crossdress.

But otherwise, no marriage equality in Harvest Moon.

Yeah, after a certain point you can change your character's model to any NPC in the game, including the opposite gender version of the protagonist. The game will still refer to you as the gender you started out as though. That's the closest you're going to get I'm afraid!

Truthkeeper
Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.


It's true. This game offers borderline pedophilia and zoophilia, but homophilia? That's where they draw the line!

The Lone Badger
Sep 24, 2007



Truthkeeper posted:

It's true. This game offers borderline pedophilia and zoophilia

I thought we couldn't marry the dragon?

Truthkeeper
Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.


The Lone Badger posted:

I thought we couldn't marry the dragon?

Well, okay, y'see, there's this horse...

And that's as much as I'm saying on the subject until we meet the relevant equine.

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Roland Jones
Aug 18, 2011


Zanzibar Ham posted:

It's nice that the first bachelorette doesn't look like a little girl. Hopefully this trend continues, because that was my biggest problem with the Rune Factory I had (I think 3, the one where you're some sheepy monster man).

Looking at the art elsewhere, Clorica's definitely the one who looks the most like an actual adult, at the least, with another who's pretty good on that front as well. Three others look varying degrees of "anime adult" to me, ranging from "this looks like an adult-sized kid" to "okay I guess that's an adult", and then there's the aforementioned "I don't care what you say, this is a child" character.

Also, man, every now and then I've wanted to play this game, but never got around to getting it. Will follow the LP along and see how it goes, maybe it'll inspire me to finally buy the game.

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