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Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Because it's my favorite 3DS game and I like sharing stuff I enjoy with people, that's why.

Rune Factory 4 is the 6th (and final) installment (the console installments didn't get numbers) of the Rune Factory series, a spinoff of the long-running farming/dating sim series Harvest Moon, and in fact the first few games were subtitled "A Fantasy Harvest Moon". Unlike the other foray in introducing Harvest Moon to alternate genres (Innocent LIfe: A Futuristic Harvest Moon never caught on), Rune Factory developed a fair following of obsessed lunatic fanboys, like me. Building upon Harvest Moon's farming and dating sim aspects and adding robust action-RPG gameplay, it hits the players on more levels than I can count. So you know, we're talking at least three or four levels here. Sadly, despite being the best game in the series, it wasn't enough to save the developer, Neverland Co. (who you may otherwise be familiar with from the Lufia series) shut their doors shortly after the game's release. Which seems to happen pretty often to developers of games I like. I'm now accepting bribes to not enjoy games made by companies you like. On the plus side, the development team behind Rune Factory got hired immediately by Marvelous , the studio behind Harvest Moon (and publisher of this series), so they're still in business.

If you're concerned that you've never played or heard of Rune Factory in your life and can't be expected to follow the plot, I'd love to tell you that the games are all self contained like Zelda or Final Fantasy and require no knowledge of previous games. But I'd be lying, because this game acts as a semi-sequel to the first game, as well as a coda to the series as a whole. But the plot doesn't require much knowledge of the other games, and I'll summarize as needed.

Sit back, relax, and try not to let the magnificent 3d graphics (that you can't see, I have turned off, and aren't actually all that magnificent) strike you blind. And enjoy this fine, hand-crafted (by somebody else ) Youtube video of the game's opening. Animated opening videos are a thing in this series, you can get to know all the characters through half-second snippets!

Opening: Travelers of the Wind (Kaze no Torabera)

And please enjoy this amusing summary of the game inadvertantly provided by MzBundifund.

Mzbundifund posted:

The people of this town must be the most jaded unflappable collection of lunatics in the world. Today the prince's butler released a rampaging elephant in the streets while the prince ran in circles screaming about buckets. Ho hum, another ordinary Tuesday. At least tomorrow we're all getting together to literally beat the stuffing off a 5 meter tall sheep.

Contents Presented in Pleasant Table Format:

Act 1

Part 1: Here We Are, Born to be Kings, We're the Princes of the Ellipses -

Part 2: Meet Art

Part 3: I Swear to Ventuswill I Will Murder the Next NPC Who Starts a Ventuswilldamned Tutorial

Part 4: Handle That Hoe

Part 5: Amnesia is Totally a Valid Excuse to Forget All Existing Debts and Responsibilities

Part 6: Harvest Factory: Prince Meets Prince

Part 7: Gone Boxiní

Part 8: Gameplay! Sweet Blessed Gameplay!

Part 9: A Tour of Selphia

Part 10: Chat up Ladies, Kill Sheep

Part 11: Meet, Greet, and Go on a Killing Spree

Part 12: Iím Scared of Butterflies

Part 13: Does Whatever a Butterfly Can

Part 14: The Fertilizer Hits the Windmill

Part 15: Beans Beans Theyíre Good For Your Heart

Part 16: The More You Eat the More You Punch Things In the Face

Part 17: Stand Clear, Venti Needs to Take an Infodump

Part 18: Every Day is Tax Day

Part 19: Freedom is Slavery

Part 20: Forged in Fire

Part 21: Foreboding Recording of Ominous Message

Part 22: The Obligatory Monty Python Reference

Part 23: Another Request to go to the Basement

Part 24: For Ventuswillís Sake, Is He Still On Namek? Itís Been Like Twelve Episodes Already!

Part 25: Dungeon #2: The Water Ruins (Finally!)

Part 26: Memories Light the Corners of My Mind

Part 27: Of Course, Of Course

Part 28: Weíre Ready to Believe You

Part 29: Every Molecule in This Turnip Exploding at the Speed of Light

Part 30: Scolly Dolly Doo, Where Are You?

Part 31: The Plot Just Dumped a Load of Serious All Over The Place

Part 32: Screw Leon, I Need Pets

A Brief Interlude on Staves

A Brief Interlude on Six Lovely Ladies

Part 33: Screw Leon, Iím Too Busy Chasing Animals

Part 34: Try Talking to Everybody and Going Everywhere

Part 35: See Sign. See Sign Run. Run Sign Run

Part 36: In Which My Human Pets Need To Level Grind

Part 37: Sexually Insecure Cookie Day

Part 38: The Delirium Lava Ruins

Part 39: Act 1 Finale: The Forest of Beginnings

Part 40: Act 1 Epilogue

Part 41: The Epilogue to This Act is Too drat Long

Act 2

Part 42: A Wild Plot Appears!

Part 43: I'm The Bull Goose Prince in This Town

Interlude: A Brief Summary of the Plot of RF1 and How It Ties into Ongoing Events

Part 44: Sercerezo, the Land of Always Spring

Part 45: Born to be King, Weíre the Prince of the Creepy Weirdos

Part 46: Raiders of the Lost Pendant

Part 47: Romance and Hats

Part 48: I Don't Care For Idra Cave

Part 49: Stupid Sechsy Soldiers

Part 50: All I Want for Christmas is Your Severed Head

Part 51: Maya Road and the Demon God Dragon

Part 52: Sechs Sechs Sechs

A Brief Interlude: End of Year Recap

Part 53: Back to the Grind

Part 54: The World of Fields

Part 55: A Shiny Distraction Appears!

A Brief Interlude With Clorica

Part 56: Giant Assholes From Giant Assholes

Part 57: Pineapple Juice is Worth the End of the World

Part 58: Hail Leon, King of the Trolls

Truthkeeper fucked around with this message at 08:15 on Mar 21, 2017


Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Here We Are, Born to be Kings, We're the Princes of the Ellipses

And we have Schrodinger's Protagonist. Male protagonist, default name Lest, on the left. Female protagonist, default name Frey, on the right. I'll be playing as Lest. Although I am totally secure enough in both my masculinity and sexuality to play Frey.

Shockingly the game starts on Day 1. Less shockingly, that isn't a count of how many days have passed, but the actual date. 4 month calendar, 30 days per month. Try not to think on how that applies to peoples' ages.

And this is how I open the box and collapse the gender waveform. I'd comment about the gender stereotyping of radical dude man and polite and proper woman, but I'm too busy facepalming at "I'm flyin' high, baby!" It sounds dumb, and is kind of out of character for Lest.

Whether 'god' is in quotes because Lest is an atheist or because he wants to emphasize the godliness (and therefore cleanliness) of Selphia's god is up for debate.

Our hero, clad in all white, and some nameless NPCs in black.

Lest: Excuse me, how close are we to Selphia?

Joyous Captain: Oh, we're almost there.

Joyful Captain: Are you settin' out to do a bit o' sightseeing?

Joyful Captain:It's a real nice town.

Joyful Captain:Beautiful air and scenery, an' got a great atmosphere.

Joyful Captain:You can feel the protection o' the god when you're standin' on them roads

Joyful Captain:You'll enjoy your stay for sure.

Are you being paid extra to advertise for the town Captain? (The answer is yes, because I'll be the one paying him to do it later)

Lest: ...

Lest: ...I hope so.

Our villains for this intro, clad in those barrels off to the left of Lest.

???: (...By the way, what are we doing?)

???: (Well you always get mad when I ask...)

???: (WHAT?!)

???: (N-nothing!)

That person. Because Lest doesn't have a name until I get to the name screen. I'm told these pronoun games don't sound nearly as silly in Japanese, maybe that's why they're more common in JRPGs.

???: (Over there. See?)

???: (Look through the hole dumbass!)

???: (Oh yeah!)

Batman? Itachi Uchiha? The man in black? I'm going with the man in black. Lest kinda sounds like Westley.

???: (We're going to make our move. Are you ready?)

???: (Yes sir!)

Lest: Huh?!

Soldier: We're taking over this ship now!

His name is Gangster Soldier. His boss is Soldier. Either we just took a swerve into Final Fantasy 7, or else these aren't exactly major villains we're dealing with here.

Soldier: If you don't wanna get hurt, do what we say!

Soldier: Got it?

Yeah, the thing! You know, the whatchamacallit! The thingamajig? Seriously, now they're just doing it for a big reveal later in the game and it isn't worth the awkward dialogue here at all.

Lest: H-how do you know about that...?

No, seriously, that's actually a very good question. Soldier's answer is technically correct, which is of course the best kind of correct, but still stupid.

Lest: ...This gift is very important.

Yeah, he's trained a lot! That's why his combat skills are all 1 out of 99!

Lest: First I press [L] to open the L pocket

That is pretty much it in a nutshell. Press (B) to swing sword. With higher skill level comes fancier moves, and I'll pick up magic and skills as I play, but for now, press button to sword.

Lest: You wanna fight, huh? Fine! Let's do this!

The equip menu, opened with the L button. If I had more than one item in my inventory, I could cycle through tabs for equipment, magic, and everything else. But when all you have is a broadsword, every problem looks like Gangster Soldier.

Good thing Lest has superhuman strength and can knock people into the air with his sword. I assume it's possible to lose this fight, if you tried to tank swords with your face without attacking back or something.

They're clearly dead, because they're lying on the ground. Enemies totally leave corpses in RPGs, right?

Soldier: Hmph. Not so fast!

Not pictured, Soldier actually hitting Lest, because I missed grabbing the shot.

And then our hero died and Gangster Soldier became the new protagonist.

Or, you know, not. It's not that it's impossible to knock somebody out with a sword, I just can't see why Soldier would bother.

Soldier: Finally!

The byplay between these guys could have been amusing if they had been recurring villains. I like to think they went on to have many exciting adventures after this.

The thing you clearly saw him drop after you hit him? I mean yes he was behind Lest when he got up and couldn't see what Lest was holding, but he should have seen the obvious glowing poo poo falling over the side of the ship.

Soldier: Or else!

Lest: Huh?

Rune Factory turned amnesiac protagonists into a running gag. All of the numbered games have protagonists with amnesia, and this is the first one where you get to play before they lose their memories. For a given value of playing, I guess. According to Rune Factory, developing amnesia causes a person to have a strong desire to move to a small rural town and become a farmer. Which I suppose is better than becoming a serial killer targeting guys named John.

Soldier: WHATEVER! Just do what I say!

Gangster Soldier: Such a tyrant...

Soldier: Hey! Are you trying to play dumb with us?

Lest: No... um... I, I really don't know--

Solider: You...!

Gangster Soldier: Sir, sir!

I question Gangster Soldier's medical credentials. I also quesiton his soldier credentials. I'm not even sure he's a real gangster. This game is a terrible web of deceit and lies!

Soldier: Are you saying a little blow to the head like that caused amnesia?!

Gangster Soldier: Sir! I don't know, sir! But maybe?

Lest: ...Um.

Lest: ...Perhaps, um... it IS amnesia?

I'd say it's not the first time, but this is actually the only time in the series we see the protagonist lose their memory, so who can say?

Gangster Soldier: You shouldn't cry over spilled milk sir.

Soldier: I know that!

Soldier: Dammit...

Soldier: No, wait a minute.

It probably would fool Gangster Soldier if he was faking.

Lest: Huh?!

Gangster Solider: Oh. good point, sir!

Solider: All right.

Gangster Soldier: Understood, sir!

Lest: What?!

That's my bathing suit area!

There's charmingly clueless villains, and then there's this guy who I'm surprised remembers to breathe without instructions.

Soldier: YOU...!

Soldier: Just use the altitude, dammit!

Gangster Soldier: Oh, like this?

Well, that would be scary enough to make me tell them anything they wanted to know.

If Soldier wasn't such a lazy bastard and had handled the interrogation himself, this game never would have happened. Thanks Soldier!

So to recap... no, there's no time, let me sum up. Lest got kicked off the side of an airship, fell a long way, through a hole in the roof of a large building. So unless there's a really soft landing in there, he's dead.

But ignore that, because we have another character, a dragon, one with a name! Eventually! (Her name is Ventuswill)

Ventuswill: Dear me...
Ventuswill: What should I do?

Do dragons count as soft things to land on? I don't think they do. Lest should be dead now.

The dragon should also be dead.

Ventuswill: What the heck?!
Ventuswill: Did someone just fall from the sky.
Ventuswill: A p-person...?

Yes, someone tends to imply person.

Well, if he isn't, I guess that's a free lunch, right?

Ventuswill: ...
Ventuswill: H-hello?
Ventuswill: You aren't dead, are you?

Lest: Owww...

Everyone knows you have to answer when somebody asks you if you're dead.

Ventuswill: Whoa!

Lest: ...Barely...

Ventuswill: Are you injured?

Lest: Well...

I don't believe him, I think he's fishing for a lawsuit.

Lest: But that's all.

Ventuswill: Only back pain after falling from the heavens?

That could have been the lead-in to a really bad human-on-dragon hentai doujin. And now that I've mentioned it it probably exists.

Lest: ...?

Keep in mind they're both identified as ??? at this point, and the textbox doesn't always indicate who's speaking. This conversation is more confusing than it has to be.

Ventuswill: What is it?

Lest: ...A talking... dragon...?

As opposed to all the non-talking dragons I'm sure he remembers being familiar with. You know, because he doesn't have amnesia or anything.

Ventuswill: Huh?!

Up to this point, Ventuswill has been speaking with a girly feminine voice, but this line and those after it are unvoiced, but instead have a deep rumbling sound, clearly indicating that she sounds like a giant fuckmothering dragon when she wants to. It's a nice touch.

Lest: ...Me...?

And we have another character! Volkanon, the mightiest butler in the world!

Volkanon: What in the world was that noise I just heard?!
Volkanon: Egads! Who is this knave?!

Ventuswill: Wait, Volkanon.

Volkanon: B-but...

Lest: Well...

The character name screen seems like a natural stopping point. I'm accepting suggestions for names, up to six letters (six letter names, when did this turn into a SNES game?). I reserve the right to veto anything obscene. Also anything I don't like. Silly names are okay, I totally went through my last playthrough playing Jojo of the Joestar Farm (he was a fist weapon specialist).

Assuming nobody posts anything at all, I'll just go with Lest.

Truthkeeper fucked around with this message at 04:12 on Jan 11, 2016

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Volkanon: Now, Lord Arthur, allow me to show you to your room.

Arthur: Arthur?

Volkanon: Yes. I heard that the name of the prince is Arthur. ...Hmm? But if that's the case, why would you call yourself by another name?

There, we got the stupid name gag out of the way, can we please skip naming him Arthur now? Although Lest would and in fact does make a much better Arthur than the actual Arthur in this game.

Oh what the hell, Arthur accepted!

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Meet Art

So Lest changed his name to Art, for the sake of not confusing me later in conversations involving or about the other character in this game named Arthur.

Art: Well... um... that's the best I can do, I'm afraid. I can't remember anything else besides my own name.

Volkanon: Oh my!

Ventuswill: You speak the truth?

Art: Yes, Ma'am.

Ventuswill: ...I see honesty in your eyes. But amnesia...!

Volkanon's schtick, besides being loving badass, is that he'll cry manly tears at the drop of a hat. And he's a hugger. We choose to allow this. We are a merciful and just ruler.

Volkanon: But rest assured! I-I'll always be on your side!

He'll always be on my side, but won't be a party member until the postgame. Such is life.

Volkanon, being a manly hugger, takes this opportunity to hug Art. Art, being small and squishy, doesn't take it well.

Art: Err... I can't... breathe...

Volkanon: Oh! Wait a minute! Perhaps you're the Prince we've been waiting for!

The Prince of the Universe? The Farmer Formerly Known As Prince? The Prince Who Was Promised?

Ventuswill: Hmm...

Flattery isn't getting you into my pants dragon. Dinner and a movie first.

Ventuswill: You must have lost your memory from the shock of the fall. Do you have any idea how or why you came to drop in from above?

Art: Well, you see...

There was this idiot, and these other idiots. We kept running into idiots

Cut to after Art explains what just happened to him.

No you didn't. You were too busy making sure the man who magically survived falling out of the sky wasn't dead and then telling him he's a prince.

Volkanon: They must be villains chasing after the prince!

Ventuswill: You're right. This can't be a coincidence. Volkanon.

Volkanon: Yes, Ma'am?

Ventuswill: Prepare a room for the prince.

The man enjoys his work. Volkanon's voice clips don't have a British accent, but I still like to give him one in my head, for he is the mightiest butler in all the land.

[/i]This was the first clear shot I managed to get of Ventuswill (before I remembered there's a button to hide textboxes). We are dealing with one seriously large dragon, possibly even one in charge.[/i]


Voice: Wendee Lee

Dragon God of the Wind and Time

One of the four Native Dragons, the gods of this world, Ventuswill sits in guardianship over the kingdom of Norad, harboring close ties to the royal family (and therefore should know drat well that Art isn't the prince). Centuries old and more than a little kooky, she lives in a fancy castle in the center of the village of Selphia, and rules the village with an iron, yet caring, fist.

Her favorite gifts are golden vegetables and pancakes. The former are unavilable until much later in the game and require great effort to grow, while the latter require a fair number of ingredients and a middling cooking score. In a pinch, she's perfectly happy with any cooked dish or crop. Her most hated gift is one of her own teeth, obtained from fighting her in the bonus dungeon.

Art: E-excuse me!
Art: Do you mean, a room for me!

I demand the penthouse! And I want a jacuzzi, and a bowl of M&Ms with all the red ones taken out!

Ventuswill: Of course.

Art: But I didn't fall down with the intent to say here...

He's a Rune Factory protagonist, so losing his memory should have caused him to immediately home in on the nearest small down with a farm for him to run. His staying here was inevitable.

Ventuswill: No doubt.

Art: Huh?

Technically fell through a gigantic hole in the roof and into your even more gigantic rear end. Said no man who wants to not be eaten alive.

Ventuswill: You are here because you were meant to be here.

Art: B-but...

You will live in this town you've never been to before surrounded by people you've never met, and assemble all the clues to discover who you are!

Ventuswill: It seems the most logical course of action, wouldn't you agree?

No, no I would not. See my previous sarcastic rephrasing of your dumb idea.

Art: I'm not sure I would call that logical, but... Are you sure I can stay?

Ventuswill: Most certainly.

Art: ...Thank you very much.

I guess it is better to not be both amnesiac and homeless.

Ventuswill: There's no need for that. However... I hope in addition to your own personal details, you've also forgotten... the tone of voice I used earlier.

Art: Earlier...? What do you mean?

Like I said before, Ventuswill started out speaking informally with a girly voice (voiced by veteran voice actress Wendee Lee, doing what sounds to me like her Haruhi voice, although I readiy admit to having a terrible ear for this sort of thing. Art is voiced by Bryce Papenbrook, who I'm not familiar with but his a decent handful of anime roles under his belt). When she introduced herself, the voice acting was replaced with roaring, which is how she's spoken since, and is only now returning to the girly voice. I'll try to point out her switching from one voice to the other as needed. drat this non-audio medium!

Art: Oh. You do sound a little different, come to think of it. A little more... arrogant, I guess? Sorry.

Art apologizes to people often enough that he has a voice clip for it.

Ventuswill: Tsk! So you do remember...

Try hitting him on the head again. It'll either cure him or give him amnesia about this too.

Art: Did you just... click your tongue derisively?!

I'm not prepared to argue for or against dragon biology in which tongue clicking is possible. We've already accepted the talking flying lizard with a fifty foot wingspan.

Ventuswill sighs.

Ventuswill: If you've heard the other side of me, I suppose there's nothing I can do about it. Oh well...

Art: Erm... Lady Ventuswill?

Gladly, much less typing for me that way. Feel free to insert your own Starbucks joke here.

Art: Venti?

Venti: Sure, why not? At this point, I don't care if you address me with respect. That ship has sailed! Furthermore, stop speaking so politely. It makes me rather uncomfortable.

Art: Hmm...

Venti: ...

Art: Yes, M--

Venti: ...

Art: O-okay.

Venti: Good.

And that is how Art did not become lunch that day

Venti: Now listen! This is important! Do not let anyone else know about this, all right?

Art: ...About what?

Nobody would ever take an informal dragon seriously, she'd have to start torching villages just to keep the peasants in line.

Art: Oho, so you're keeping that se--

Art: Y-yes, M--V-Venti...

Good thing Art wore his brown pants today.

Venti: Hmph!

Volkanon runs back in, presumably his super butler hearing alerted him that Venti was yelling at somebody and he came in to clean up the mess. But with no messy corpse to dispose of, he provides an alternate reason.

Volkanon: Lady Ventuswill, the room is now ready.

Ventuswill: Well done. Your body must ache. Rest early today, Prince.

Volkanon: Now, Lord Arthur, allow me to show you do your room.

Art: Arthur?

Volkanon: Yes. I heard that the name of the Prince is Arthur.

There are lots of princes in Norad, the king really gets around I guess. One of them is a traveling salesman, another is a protagonist in a game that isn't as good as this one.

Volkanon: ...Hmm?

That's the whole reason that guy wanted me to pick Arthur for a name. It isn't worth it, and i like Art better anyway.

Art: Um... Am I really... a Prince...?
As long as it doesn't involve sword fighting impossibly bishounen teenagers, I see no reason why not

Volkanon: ...I see. Even the one thing you thought you remembered... it must be tough.

Art: Oh no, that's not what I'm saying...

Volkanon: It's only natural you'd be a bit bewildered. I think it's best that you turn in early today.

Art: But...

And if you aren't you'll be quickly executed for impersonating royalty. Vive le roi!

Art: But I haven't forgotten. My name is Art.

Ventuswill: Hmm... Art... That's a rather fun name. You may use that name for now if you wish.

Art: But I'm telling you--

Ventuswill: I'll leave the rest to you Volkanon.

Volkanon: Of course. Now Prince, let us go!

Volkanon goes off, but before Art can follow him...

Ventuswill: Art.

Art: Yes?

Ventuswill: Don't forget about the promise we made earlier.

Art: What promise?

Art: Oh, okay. I remember now.

Really starting to think Gangster Soldier would have been a less stupid protagonist. Then again, Art has literal brain damage, we should cut him some slack, and maybe get him to a loving doctor.

Venti: Honestly... How could I have slipped up so bad...? Be sure you keep that promise. Or else!

Art: O-okay... I will!

At long last, we get out of Ventuswill's throne room/cave/secret love nest and follow Volkanon to Art's bedroom/secret love nest.

Volkanon: Allow me to explain your housing arrangements. Please follow me.

I could, but this is my first chance to show off the interface.


Nothing too non-standard, meters in top left, equipped weapon and spells/skills in bottom right. Meters are HP, which work as per usual, and RP (Rune Points). Rune points are the fuel for every action, every sword swing (that hits something), spell cast, watered crops, hammered rocks, all of them consume RP. If I run out of RP, those actions will consume HP, and I will loving die take an expensive trip to the local doctor's office.

I have two slots to equip spells and skills, on X and Y buttons. I can unlock two more slots R+X and R+Y later. Right now I only have the Escape spell, which is free, teleports me to the entrance of a dungeon if I'm in one, or otherwise teleports me back to the village, or to my bedroom if I'm in the village. This spell is so useful I don't need to equip it, there's a big blue button for it on the touch screen.

The touchscreen is mostly filled with my map, which currently shows my bedroom area . The Escape spell is on the bottom left, on the right are buttons for opening my inventory and my quest log. At the top are the date and time and my current funds (200G, we will assume a G is a solid gold coin with Venti's face stamped on it, because it amuses me).

Aside from the interface, the whole room is mostly visible from here. There are exits west, back to Venti's room, northwest, to the basement, where I can check my achievements, scores in various contests, change the difficulty to hard mode (which I will do), and view an art gallery. The bonus dungeon will also appear there later.

There's an exit to the farm to the north, and two exits south. One leads to the town square, the other to my personal shop in the town square, where I will eventually be able to try and trick tourists into paying me vastly inflated prices for my items. It's a decent money maker in the early game, but takes time and RP.

Volkanon insists on showing me my diary, where I can save my game, and my bed, which he "But thou must!"s me into sleeping in. He won't leave the room until I go to bed, little creepy. Little creepy.

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Tarezax posted:

I think I know which way the wind is blowing

when can we marry the dragon

I totally would have if it was an option. Rumor has it that a Venti marriage option was nixed from the game during production. Leaving this as the only main line RF where the girl they spend the whole game throwing at you isn't actually an available marriage candidate.

EDIT: In retrospect, I really should have just done all these tutorial posts as a single update. But finally, honest to Venti gameplay incoming. I swear I spend more time waiting for screenshots to convert than I do playing the game, but it's better than having none at all. From here on out, I'm paraphrasing the tutorials to spend more time playing the drat game.

Truthkeeper fucked around with this message at 07:05 on Jan 14, 2016

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

I Swear to Ventuswill I Will Murder the Next NPC Who Starts a Damned Tutorial

So after falling asleep under Volkanon's creepy yet watchful eye, Art had to eventually wake up.

This room clearly needs lockable doors. Or any doors at all.

All available marriage candidates, regardless of gender, get a quick little animated cutscene to introduce them and flag them as a potential mate. Here we have our first girl, Clorica.

Probably not the royal concubine then.


Voice: Heather Hogan


Clorica, a sweet, yet narcoleptic girl. This girl falls asleep in the middle of anything and everything, and is capable of doing her tasks around the castle while napping. Such powers of sleepwalking are to be admired. When awake, she has difficulty being decisive about anything, at all. I don't particularly like or dislike her, beyond finding her kind of dull. Her favorite gift is apple pie, but tea, vegetables, and shiny rocks will all do in a pinch.

In battle, Clorica wields spears fairly well. casts low level healing spells and status recovery spells, can throw random food to me if I don't already have a food buff, and can fall asleep mid-battle. Not an optimal choice, but not terrible either.

Um, excuse me? Are you awake?

Her little eye rub here is admittedly adorable, and I like the level of detail they went into on these sprites..

Uh, good morning.

How can you sleep standing there?

I don't really know myself.

Hmm... I think I came in here for something

Oh dear. What was it?

Ah! That's right.

This is the main task performed by Clorica and her spear counterpart Vishnal. One or the other will show up in the morning to provide a wakeup call. I could specify that I want one or the other if I had a particular preference, or even disable them altogether.

Are you awake yet?


Oh, good. Good morning, then. And I'm pleased to meet you.

My name is Clorica. I'm a butler in training.

I'm Art.

And I'm the loving prince.

Oh? How strange...

Oh, uh...

No, my name is definitely Art.

I'd rather you call me that.

As you wish, Art.

So my name is both fun and pleasant-dream-y. Note a distinct lack of manly.

Assume that I've already bitten my tongue regarding every bit of sexual innuendo I could have put into this commentary. Just because my jokes are tasteless doesn't mean I can't have some loving decorum.

Thank you very much.

Oh. Here.

I made some breakfast. Please have some, if you'd like.

"If I'd like", she says. This is the eating tutorial, and I'm not allowed to say no. Besides, it's loving pie. You know who refuses apple pie? Godless Unamerican Communists!

Apple pie... Always been a favorite of mine too.

Thank you!

You're very welcome!

And so Art ate of the pie, and it was good. And would have restored all of his health and RP if they weren't already full, so this was really wasteful.

That was delicious!

I'm so glad!

Eat one meal a day and you'll become stronger and stronger.


Not just good advice, but literal truth. Art has an eating skill that slowly increases from the first item eaten each day. Every skill, even the stupid ones like eating, sleeping, walking, and bathing, gives stat boosts as it increases. This is why I make an effort to level up all weapon and magic skills even though I tend to stick to just one or two for any given playthrough.

So don't forget to eat every day!

I'll be taking my leave now.

Shouldn't she wait until I give her permission to leave? I've never interacted with a butler before, but I'm fairly certain this is the case.

Oh, but one last thing before I go!


Once you're fully awake, go outside using that back door.

There's a field out there.

And you're going to learn how to till it!

Terrable, Fiersome, and Aquticus, I pray to thee oh mighty dragon gods, fly down and smite these loving unskippable tutorials.


Till a field?

But I might get dirt under my fingernails!

That's right!

Lady Ventuswill left very specific instructions.

There's your answer, the prince has to farm because Ventuswill's a drat dirty Communist. What the hell work is she doing that she's allowed to eat? Don't question the party leader unless you want to be sent to the gulag.


I am, supposedly, a Prince, right?

Oh sure, trying to use your royal status you don't believe you have to get out of hard work. Art, you're a slacker!

That's right!

...So a Prince is going to till the field?

Of course. Who else would?

I dunno, who took care of this field before Art showed up? Are you telling me Ventuswill ordered a farm to be built just on the off chance an amnesiac fell out of the loving sky and she could con him into running the place for her?

I thought a Prince was supposed to have more of an elegant lifestyle.

Clorica has no time for your poo poo excuses slacker.


According to Lady Ventuswill...'re perfectly suited to tilling soil.

However; you're loving useless at watering plants, and will quickly be replaced by a trained monkey.

What does that even mean?

I'm not sure...

Go right ahead Art. The fresh air will do you some good, and who doesn't like some down-home country living out on the... farm...

This isn't a field. This is a vacant lot full of crap.

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Handle That Hoe

The rest of today's tutorials focus on farming and princing. Here to teach me how to farm is Vishnal, a eligible bachelor for the female player.

That's... only a little creepy looking.


Voice: Vic Mignogna


The man of a thousand anime voices there, and hell if I can place this one as being like any of the others. I'll let somebody with a better ear for voices than mine figure that one out. Vishnal is the red to Clorica's blue, hot-blooded and passionate where she's calm and controlled, a man of action to her narcolepsy... and hopelessly incompetent to her doing work in her sleep. It's not that Vishnal's really bad at his job... he's just really bad at his job. But he aspires to greatness, seeking to emulate his idol, the god of butlers, MR. VOLKANON! Vishnal is amusing, but I wouldn't have tapped that with a ten foot pole during my Frey playthrough.

In battle, Vishnal has the same healing spells as Clorica, but uses double swords. He can't throw food either, but doesn't fall asleep. About as middle of the road as Clorica.

You are the Prince, right?

Nope, sorry, he just left town. I'm the new farmer, my name's MacDonald..

I've been waiting for you, Prince!!

I swear to Ventuswill if he starts humping my leg...


I still may or may not be a Prince.

So will you just call me Art?



...I see.


Fun, pleasant-dream-y, and splendid. Pretty nice name, huh?

Please allow me to formally introduce myself. Ahem!

Good morning to you! My name is Vishnal!

I am training here to be a full-fledged butler!

Although at times I may cause you trouble...

...I am honored to serve you Art!!

Nice meeting you.

When did Volkanon get here?

Again, just like eating, increasing my various farming skills will increase my stats.

Those runes will recharge my RP and increase a skill by enough XP to be worth a whole level most of the time. Sometimes it'll be a rueny spirit instead, those give direct stat boosts. Farming, it's sort of the mechanic the whole game is built around.


Oh, right! I forgot that you lost your memory...

My apologies.

Runes are... the life energy of anything and everything organic in this world.

In this case, what you may see are crystallized forms of runes overflowing from the crops.

Runes have been a staple mechanic of this series from the beginning, a Rune Factory is a farm run in such a way that it produces lots of runes. I think this is the first time they ever tried to explain how the gently caress it works.

So farm with love, and your crops will undoubtedly be brimming with runes.

Now about the field...

...It seems to be... covered in weeds.

And rocks. And tree stumps. And probably beer bottles. Seriously, vacant lot.


It's been this way since the last typhoon.

But I'm sure with a bit of elbow grease, you'll be able to fix it up in no time!

Well, no, a lot of this is going to require specialized tools. I can't quite rip tree stumps out of the ground with my bare hands. This is one of those situations where the two forms of gameplay don't synchronize well, I can't clear the field with fire spells or water crops with water spells.

Yeah, no, this isn't my bag. I've got a sword, I think my future is in becoming a highwayman.

Now, now, don't try to deny it.

Lady Ventuswill told me all about it.

She said you have an exceptional talent for farming.

She also says I'm royalty, and refuses to feed me if I don't slave away on this farm for her. Actually, I don't think she ever gives me any food at all! Unless I'm committing to work here for the rest of my life in exchange for that pie Clorica gave me.

Now let me explain to you how the crops are actually grown.

In short, clear crap off the field, hoe the ground (the farm is divided into 72 tillable squares in a 6x12 rectangle), plant seed, water crop. Repeat endlessly. This is one of the two basic formulas that have sustained a moderately popular video game series for 20 years and spawned one moderately successful spin-off (the less said about Innocent Life, the better). When I try to do this in real life, my vegetables often live just long enough to be devoured by the local wildlife.

End result. Some wet dirt. In real life, if you can see the seeds like this after planting them, you hosed up.

Yeah, context is everything. The other formula, of course, is pitching woo talking right and getting into the pants of that person of your preferred gender.

But never Volkanon. His pants are inaccessible. Clearly this is why Venti isn't eligible for a relationship, she has no pants to get into.

Having endured Vishnal's spiel on the nature of growing turnips, I get to name the farm.

Lastly, it's time to name this farm.

Does this really qualify as a farm?


No, absolutely not. It's still the vacant lot, with a turnip plant in one corner, behind the castle. There's probably a liquor store on one side and a check cashing place on the other, and a really shady gold buying place over yonder.

By building MOnster Barns and befriending your livestock...

... you can collect their milk and shear their wool. It will be a true farmland in due time!

Milk, wool, and other, less savory animal products. By the time this is over, I will be enslaving demons so I can collect their blood. Also, lots of bees, for the absolutely abusrd amounts of honey I go through in the end game.


You can also have the monsters help you with your farm work.

This used to be really complicated, with some monsters being able to water crops, and some harvest, and some not being able to work but being able to fight, or be used as transportation. Now every monster can be used for every task. Look forward to dragon riding in the dark times to come.

Now, please think of a name!

Given that Art is short for Arthur, I went with the obvious choice.

I think I need an adult.

I am an adult!!

Truthkeeper fucked around with this message at 08:37 on Jan 15, 2016

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Zanzibar Ham posted:

It's nice that the first bachelorette doesn't look like a little girl. Hopefully this trend continues, because that was my biggest problem with the Rune Factory I had (I think 3, the one where you're some sheepy monster man).

Only one in this game. And I honestly feel like a pedophile any time I try to romance her. It's too loving creepy.

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

One more very short update tonight.

Amnesia is Totally a Valid Excuse to Forget All Existing Debts and Responsibilities

Turnip seeds! It would make the tutorial worth it, except I can trip over bags of these almost anywhere. Also, they're dirt cheap.

You can buy seeds at the general store.

So if you'd like to grow more crops, that's the place to visit.

The selection is extremely limited at this point, but unlike other RF/HM games, not limited by season.

Ah, and by the way...

Lady Ventuswill was calling you.

The tutorial session thankfully ends with a summons from Ventuswill.

Good morning to you.

How goes the farm work?

Because you have the talent of an Earthmate.

I, the player, know this because he's a Rune Factory protagonist, and they're all Earthmates (except maybe Micah from RF3, he was just the product of bestiality). Venti knows this because... fuckmothering dragon god king.


As an Earthmate, Art has an deep connection to all living things that enables him to murder the gently caress out of monsters and grow awesome poo poo better than normal people. Clearly this is why he's fit to rule.

...That bump on the head must've messed with you far more than expected if you've forgotten THAT!

Brain damage is no joke Venti, and I resent your mockery of Art's terrible mmisfortune! That's my job.

Well, let's do an experiment.

Come closer.


What are we doing?

Breakfast, obviously.

Perhaps I can bring your memory back wiht my power.



...Well, really-ISH, anyway. I can't guarantee anything.

Experiment, perhaps, really-ish, no guarantees. Sign me the gently caress up and drat the consequences!

Let's try it!

I mean, please, let me try!


All right, all right.

Come then, let's go!

Maybe this would have been a better place for the "I need an adult" joke.



It's... not working...

So... it doesn't work, then, after all...

I can't bring back memory unless I'm involved in it.

That's... oddly specific.

...Why don't you just give up?

Because, if you;re right, I'm loving royalty and thus likely have responsibilities and poo poo I'm supposed to be doing? ANd if you're wrong I probably still do? For all Venti knows Art has a wife and kids somewhere wondering where Papa is.

How could I possibly do that?!

We at least know that you're a Prince.

So you mustn't worry.

Oh, good, as long as we know THAT.

How about you go out and do some meet-and-greet with the locals?

Someone might recognize your face.

Because, you know, the dragon king god doesn't recognize you, but Joe down the street totally bought a car from you on Ventislist that one time.

Oh, that's true!

I'll do that right now!

Naturally, Art meets the entire population of Selphia in seconds through the power of MONTAGE.


It didn't work...

I see. I'm very sorry.

But don't be disappointed.

There's still a chance that you're the Prince.

A chance. She was so sure before.

You can write a letter to the royal capital to confirm.

And if all else fails... can always start a new life here.

It's not that easy.

Yeah, it's not like somebody just handed you a home and a job the day you got here or anything. Tell me more about how hard your life is Art.

I know. But I'm very serious, and I think in time, you too may find it the best course of action.


So there's no need to worry.

Cheer up!


Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

It's true. This game offers borderline pedophilia and zoophilia, but homophilia? That's where they draw the line!

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

The Lone Badger posted:

I thought we couldn't marry the dragon?

Well, okay, y'see, there's this horse...

And that's as much as I'm saying on the subject until we meet the relevant equine.

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Xun posted:

Aw yes farming game lp. I don't own a ds so I will vicariously enjoy planning crop rotations through this.

NOrmally I would laugh and say you're expecting too much... but in this game crop rotation and managing soil health is kind of a big deal. I'll explain it later.

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Harvest Factory: Prince Meets Prince

A new challenger approaches! Too bad, I was looking forward to Venti trying to convince Art that it's totally okay to abandon his life up to this point so he can live in a castle and grow turnips.

It's a very regal haircut, I suppose, but that doesn't make it any less silly. Also, another person in the room means back to big booming dragon god king voice for Venti.


And who, pray tell, is addressing me?

The King of Norad is clearly a virile man. Arthur is, by my count, the third prince of Norad to appear in the series so far, the others being in the first game.

I will be staying here in Selphia starting today.

Lady Ventuswill, I kindly ask for your guidance.

...Um, is something wrong...?

Are you... the prince?

Wow Venti, nothing gets past you. Sharp as a tack. Can we trade our god in for another, this one's defective.

That's right.

I thought I sent a letter stating that I would be arriving today.

(See, I told you it wasnít me!)

(There was no way I could be the Prince!)

(Ugh, be quiet already!)

(E-even a perfect being can make a mistake or two in life!)


Oh. Ahem!

So you are the true Prince then?

WellÖ how do I explainÖ

ÖAh, thatís it!

Betrayal! We knew the dragon god king could not be trusted! Quick, whip out your sword and hold the Prince hostage!

Weíd never seen your face, so we had no choice but to believe the little troublemaker.


(Youíre the one that kept insisting I was royalty!)

(Sh-shut up! Heíll hear us!)

Thatís why weíve given away the room that was prepared for you, Iím afraid.

We beg your forgiveness.

And if you donít forgive her, Venti will eat you, and then Art will steal your identity. Doofy hair, glasses, robe, totally Prince Art-thur now.

Oh, myÖ

This is why I keep calling Venti the Dragon-God-King, because she insists on using a masculine voice and the pluralis majestatis. Or at least that had damned well better be the royal we, because Iím sure as hell not doing anything to make up for this. I got shanghaied into impersonating royalty, thatís probably a capital offense!

(ArtÖ ÖIím sorry.

(IÖ really am sorryÖ)

Oh Terrable, sheís really going to have me executed for this!

(Will you stay at the inn for a while? Iíll let them know.)

Or just move me into sub-standard housing. I hope sheíll find me a new job to pay for my lodging since the new guy is probably going to be tending the farm. I hope he takes good care of my turnips.

Itís alright. I wasnít supposed to be here in the first place.

Please wait.

What will you do? Where will you go?

WellÖ Iíll stay at the inn until everythingís settled.

...Iím sorry Art.

And this is why Art is Art, and not Arthur. This conversation would be hopelessly confusing, and not in a fun way.

Please donít be.

Unless they have me executed for this later, in which case I hope the guilt wracks your soul for all eternity.

ÖThereís no need for that.


This mustíve happened for a reason.

Art, was it?

Prince, Pauper, yadda yadda.

Itís not a title you can hand over to a stranger you know.

Canít I?

Yeah, pretty sure it doesnít work that way, especially if your god is telling you no.


I honestly donít think itís that important of a title.

You are 13th in line for the throne. Thatís not close, but all it takes is one major war, such as with the hostile empire on your borders, to cut down that family tree real quick.

Of course, Iím not suggesting we trade our actual names or positions. JustÖ

ÖJust what? What is it youíre planning, exactly?

Thereís something that I wish to do.

But I canít do it if Iím busy running the town.

Plenty of rulers manage to get some tail on the side Arthur. Itís a simple matter of logistics. Weíll rid you of that pesky virginity in no time.

SoÖ will you take on my responsibilities?

Iíll require a detailed list of what those responsibilities are and how Iíll be compensated for this.

Ö Wouldnít this mean betraying your father?

Iím not sure this counts as actual treason. Still a terrible loving idea though.

I am prepared for that.


I can tell that you have true passion within your heart.

Is this the same sense that let you detect Artís air of nobility? I repeat, our dragon god is defective.

You have my permission.



Well they were your responsibilities anyway, until Prince Arthur appeared before us.

No they werenít! They were always his! You tricked me into this! Iíll have my revenge yet! Iíll kill you so many loving times in the postgame Iíll be making armor out of your teeth!

Weíll just say nothingís changed and leave it at that. Shouldnít be a problem, right?

Notice that nobody has actually asked Art if heís okay with being the Prince.

Ö Please, Art.

Okay, thatís better. Totally okay with this now.

Youíll do it?!

Excellent! I knew we could count on you!


Thank you very much.

I will explain the duties of a prince to you in the coming days.

By which he means in a few minutes.

For now, however, I must look for a place to stay.


You should continue to use the room in the castle.

Since you are the acting Prince, after all.


Donít worry, I have a talent for negotiating. I donít anticipate any problems.

Oh Ventuswill heís going to get shanked in a back alley.

Now, I must be off!

What a dutiful young man.

Yes. So dutiful, the way he tricked me into doing his job for him.


Why are you sighing?

Playing the part of royalty is a once in a lifetime opportunity, no?

Life is short.

I will tell Volkanon, and everybody else, to support you.

I can help too, if you need it.

Ö Okay.

I guess it could be a good experience for me.

Positive thinking is always good.

I knew I could trust you, Art.

So what were you going to say earlier?

Oh, yes, that!

It was about the duties of a Prince.

ÖEven though Iím not one, and never said I was?

Artís personality took a while to grow on me, but I like him, especially times like this when he makes sure to mock the god emperor dragon.

My, you are a stubborn one!

Hee hee.

AnywayÖ letís discuss the matter now, shall we?

Trust is the most important aspect in your role as Prince.

More important than grinding commoners beneath my foot? I donít think Venti knows much about ruling.

So does that mean I should make friends with the townsfolk?

Neither does Art, clearly. If you treat them like your equals, it will only encourage them to believe they are your equals.

Friendship doesnít necessarily lead to trust as a Prince.

You donít ask your friends to help you work, after all, do you?

Yes, I do, almost constantly. Half the point of making friends with characters in this game is so you can take them adventuring with you.

So thatís why you must be trusted as a Prince first.

And thatís done by completing duties as a Prince?


But, howÖ

Thereís a red box in the square outside that door.

By answering these requests, your work will be recognized.

So I should just keep completing the requests in the box, then?


That will help you quickly build a good reputation among your loyal subjects.

The best way to build a good reputation (expressed in the game through Prince Points, which I can spend to do poo poo that Arthur will be along to explain later) is by killing bosses. A mid -game item can convert the bonus dungeon into a boss rush, with each run through being worth more than a request.

And the better your reputation, the faster your farm work will progress.

Wait, how does that work?

Youíll see.

ÖAnyway, thatís all I wanted to say.

Why donít you go check and see whatís in the request box.

Truthkeeper fucked around with this message at 03:30 on Jan 20, 2016

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Glazius posted:

You've got a stray SCR_TOP_RIGHT in there.

Ah, thanks for the heads up. I somehow managed to miss img tagging that one.

Part of the inconvenience of screenshotting this directly from the 3ds is that the software is very basic. I press the button, it takes 3 shots (bottom screen, top sceen left, and top screen right, which are identical if 3d is turned off). Then when I stop playing, I run another program to convert the raw images saved in-game to PNGs (which takes longer than the time spent actually playing), which I then pull off the SD card and comb through. I'm glad to be able to do it at all, I just wish the technology was a little more advanced.

Glazius posted:

I do like that this conceit is essentially "hey Earthpriest this place needs some Earthpriesting and you'd be a poo poo Earthpriest if you couldn't grow enough to feed yourself".

Rune Factory has never been shy about saying "Hey you, this is a farm, you're a farmer now, get to work". There's something very shady about press-ganging amnesiacs into farmwork.

Truthkeeper fucked around with this message at 03:36 on Jan 20, 2016

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Gone Boxiní

It kinda looks like a pimp hat, on top of a stack of lumber, on top of a carpet, on top of a really ugly lamp. This is in no way, shape, or form, a box.

ÖHuh? Who was that? Where are you?

ÖWhaaa? You can hear me?

I canÖ but I canít see you.

Iím right in front of your face!

Itís a matter of record that Art has brain damage. Can auditory hallucinations be caused by brain damage? All signs point to yes. Getting checked out by a doctor would be a very intelligent thing to do.

No, that wonít be necessary! Iím Eliza the request box!

And Iím ever so glad you can hear me. Now listen up!

Inside me is a list of all the important requests everyone has made.

Because let's face it, everyone needs help sometimes.

But you can' t solve all of them at once. No, no!

So I'll help you solve them one by one.

You got that?

...Well, donít worry. Just take it slow.

Letís start by trying it out. Try taking a request.

Letís start with this request.

The request system in a nutshell. Do something, get reward. You can complete a maximum of three requests per day, and successfully completing all 92 non-repeatable requests unlocks new game +. These early requests will flesh out my farming supplies, giving me seeds and tools. Further requests will make a greater variety of items available for sale, reward crafting recipes, and give useful items (and sometimes not so useful). The last few will be a right pain in the rear end to complete.

Castle: Dragon Room is, unsurprisingly, Ventiís big lair/throne room.

Good, good. Well done.

If you find the request to be too difficult, you may cancel it from the Notebook.

The Notebook is located in the bottom right corner of the lower screen. Touch it to open.

Well, that should be enough explaining for one day. Your head is liable to explode!

Tell me about it. Iíve stretched two days of tutorials out across four updates already.

Start by going to Castle: Dragon Room right away.

Well then, let us do as the magical talking box/disturbing hallucination has commanded, and go back into Ventiís room to check out the order symbol.

The order symbol. The symbol of all Order in this world that, if destroyed, will allow this land to be consumed by Chaos for all eternity? No. Itís not much of a symbol either, itís more of a sign.

But what am l supposed to be looking at, exactly?

Arenít you supposed to be out in an alley somewhere getting robbed blind at knifepoint?

Oh, yes!

Thank you very much for coming here.

Itís a forced tutorial, you didnít give me a choice.

I've been trying to find you. I would like us to discuss your duties as Prince.

What do you mean?

These directives are regarded as orders.

As well they should be. Any who fail to heed my word shall be put to the sword! So let it be written, so shall it be done!

And this is the place where you can make your orders.

SoÖ itís a podium? A table with a fancy pen for signing decrees? A bulletin board?


I think it would be easier to understand if you simply try it.

The game cares not for my attempts to figure out how unsupported game mechanics are supposed to work and presses on. So itís a bulletin board.

Please, make an order with these.

What...are these?

These are the points you'll need to spend to make orders.

So itís a coin-operated bulletin board.

Theyíre representative of your skill and reputation as a bonafide Prince.

You can make many different kinds of orders by using these Prince Points.

Prince PointsÖ

Clearly Art finds this as silly as I do. Itís not a bad mechanic (although very grindy in the end game), but this explanation of how it works is just silly.

Well, give it a try!

Choose any order you'd like

SPOILER ALERT: Thereís only one option.

Okay, got it!

I never even had the chance to use the 15 slot backpack before upgrading to 30 slots. Maybe I would have liked having a limited inventory! Yeah, I couldnít even type that with a straight face. Backpack expansions are a godsend. Dragonsend? Ventuswillsend?

Easy, wasn't it? Just use your Prince Points to make an order...

Öand whatever you asked of your loyal subjects, it will come to pass, without fail .

Isn't it a little...oppressive, though? For my will to be done without any question, l mean.

Weíve already had dirty godless communists, but Art is very clearly a heroic man of the republic ready to bring down the monarchy. Vive la revolution! As long as I can still order people around and be better than everybody else! are a Prince!

Arthur, on the other hand, is being sized up for a guillotine.

A Prince, huh...

What's wrong?

l just donít want to make people mad by being too demanding, you know?

Poor Art clearly has no idea how politics work.

This whole thing feels really...selfish, l guess?

No need to worry about that!

letís not as if you can do absolutely anything you want, after all.

You told me the exact opposite not a minute ago.

See? Right there, in black and yellowish-greenish gradient!

lt... sounds like l can, though!

Not as long as there are Prince Points you can' t!

Put simply, Prince Points show how much people trust you as a Prince.

Which is why I most often receive them for things nobody sees me do. Itís very important to gain the trust of the people by running through boss rushes in a secret bonus dungeon under the castle.

As you complete requests from the Request Box, you'll earn more Prince Points.

Also, killing enemies, up to 10 points per day, and 20 points per boss killed without limit. And 1 free point per day if I shipped something the previous day. Iím fairly certain the only way to lose them without spending is to try and enter the opposite gender bath area at the inn.

ln short...'s only when people trust you that you can save up enough Prince Points to matter.

Or, again, any time Iím willing and able to go on a killing spree.

It takes a lot of points to affect any sort of major change.

Unlocking one of the major Gods of this world as a recruitable NPC: 30000 points, plus a long grind of additional points to reach the top prince rank. Nationalized healthcare (via free bathing, which restores all HP and RP): 35000. Actual nationalized healthcare (via not having to pay the doctor): Impossible.

So if you're not trusted or well-liked, your powers are very limited.

And yet my ability to gain points is completely independent of my friendship levels with the townsfolk.

I see...

Just think of it this way:

lf you have enough points to give an order, then youíve earned the right to give that order.

Iíll have earned the right to a lot of things by the time I grind enough points to nationalize the baths, unlock both unlockable characters, and fully upgrade my farm.

...Aaaaand, since you've now completed my request...

Allow me to give you these as a token of my gratitude.

You should have noticed that your Prince Points just
went up.

What does that mean, exactly? Sounds strangely ... meta.

Strangely unfunny too. Meta jokes about tutorials were funny a very long time ago, and never again since. This would actually be funnier if he hadnít tried to be even more meta by pointing it out.

Note that you don't usually earn this much from one request.

Thereís more thing l want you to do, and it will require a large number of points.

So l added a bit of a bonus. A show of confidence in you, as it were.

Oh? What do you want me to do?

Well, let's go on to the next request, shall we?



Money goes where the people go, after all.

And the more money you make, the more you can develop the country.

The role of a Prince is to make this country a better place to be.

And simply put, to accomplish that, tourists are absolutely essential

Yes. Of course. Anybody who lives in a popular tourist destination will surely tell you how much they love a bunch of loud smelly foreign tourists wandering around.

All right. That makes sense.

So... let's hold a festival to attract tourists, shall we?

A festival?

This is... another one of those things you'll likely learn a bit easier simply by doing it.

Itís true, but they could at least make a token effort to explain how it works.

Try to order a festival.

I think it would be better to choose a festival you can hold as soon as possible.

Like a cooking contest! That I canít enter because itís in 3 days and I have no means to cook anything.

That way, you'll get a feel for the whole process much more quickly.

Letís do it!

A little further out, and requires no preparation.

Well done.

You attracted more tourists by getting the town's name out there.

And if the festival is a rousing success..., if you participate in it personally, and really boost spirits...

...then you'll attract even more tourists, and this town will be a booming metropolis in no time!

Booming metropolis? Itís a sleepy small border town, with an inexplicable castle in the middle and an inexplicable vacant lotfarm behind the castle. Population is about 20-30.

I see...

...So, uh, what is "Apprentice Prince" exactly?

My prince rank, increases with tourism.

That's your title.

Your present Prince title is determined by the number of tourists.

I said that already.

Which is why rank is important. Unlockable characters require top the rank.

The more tourists you bring in...

...the more the town will develop, and the more new items you'll be able to purchase.

The cool thing here is that the town does develop, with new orders bringing in additional stores and improving existing stores. Not very much though.

For example, new vegetable and flower seeds, stronger weapons, more reliable armor...

If Iím relying on storebought weapons and armor for more than two dungeons, something has gone horribly wrong and I want somebody to take me out back to the vacant lot and shoot me.

All of which will also help you complete more complex requests.

How many prince points to have the act of giving tutorials punishable by death?

Well, that does it for my explanation of Prince work, so...

And then he was gone. Arthurís the best, most responsible prince ever.

At least itís not a full nothing but tutorial update. I planted the turnip seeds Arthur gave me. My vacant lot is slowly becoming more farm-like. Maybe Arthur, Volkanon, Vishnal, and Eliza can perform community service for their crimes against the crown by working the fields. I think Eliza would make an excellent scarecrow.

Truthkeeper fucked around with this message at 17:52 on Jan 31, 2016

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

NullBlack posted:

Also, are you using software that scans images into text? Because spellcheck revealed a number of lower-case 'L's masquerading as upper-case 'i's at the beginnings of lines of dialogue.

Yes I am. And yes, it turns out that did happen. I think I got them all this time, but clearly I need to start picking a better time to post updates when I can do a better job checking them before posting.

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

HenryEx posted:

Well, i do have the entire game's english script in a text file somewhere, if that would help

Sadly i can't just put it into pastebin, because apparently pastebin has a 512KB file limit. The things you learn...

(the game's script has 99,572 entries, this does not include strings like names, people, items, their descriptions etc)

That would be more kinds of useful than I can count! I looked around for one when I first started this project, but couldn't find anything. Half the reason I'm making os little progress is that I spend more time converting raw screenshot data to png, converting png to pnm, cropping images, and then OCR'ing them, than I do playing the game and writing about it. And it's still much faster doing it that way than it was the first few updates where I transcribed each line by hand.

So what I'm saying is that I would love to get a copy of that in whatever manner is most convenient for you.

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

I honestly don't care that much for any of the bachelors, but Arthur and Leon are the most tolerable. Male player characters definitely got the best pick though, every girl is tolerable at least.

The update to come later tonight or tomorrow was certainly in no way, shape, or form delayed by some idiot saving over both of his save files, necessitating playing through the tutorials again. Thank Ventuswill for text skipping.

And a handful of the sceenshots I took don't seem to have made it. Unfortunate, but they weren't critical, I just wanted to show off the town a little. Maybe next time.

Truthkeeper fucked around with this message at 08:25 on Feb 6, 2016

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Gameplay! Sweet Blessed Gameplay!
Iím a little excited to have made it through those tutorials. Thereís a few more left, but theyíre shorter and more spread out.

I donít think this is the first time Iíve shown the bottom screen, but it is the first time Iíve talked about it. Maps! The bottom screen shows a map of the current area, with NPCs locations marked with their faces. I like it, too many hours spent wandering around various Harvest Moon towns wondering where this girl or that currently is, too many brain cells burnt out memorizing peoplesí schedules. No more! As a bonus, there are simple, logical, and non-intrusive touch screen buttons. On the left, the big blue button is my Escape spell, menaing I donít have to waste a spell equip slot on it (though I am forced to waste a spell inventory slot). On the right, inventory and journal buttons. This screen also shows important details like the date, time, weather, and my current funds. Iím loving broke, and itís not going to get better for a while. Iíll have an empty wallet by the end of the day.


Voice: Erin Fitzgerald

Dragon Knight

Another voice actor Iím not familiar with, though I recognized a handful of her roles on IMDB. Forte is the Dragon Knight of Selphia (and yet she uses a sword, not a spear, and I donít think sheís ever even heard of jumping in combat). Forte knows drat well that her job is completely useless, so she does her best to protect the town instead. Watch her masterfully nearly kill her new neighbor! I kid, but Forte is definitely my go-to adventuring companion of choice in the early game. Mostly because I donít get a choice in the matter, sheís the only person who will adventure with me at a friendship level lower than 3. I guess nobody wants to follow the creepy brain-damaged new guy into the woods for some reason. Forte aspires toward martial perfection, being a shining pillar of strength and virtue. And she dearly loves her little brother, who sheís raised since their parents died inÖ a tragic accident which also claimed the lives of every other person over 40? Except Blossom, but nothing can kill that old lady, sheís ten feet tall and bulletproof. Volkanonís survival clearly needs no explanation.

In battle, Forte is an engine of destruction with both short and long swords, and she can cast a couple healing spells and some self-buffs. Her favorite gift is union stew (a damned complicated recipe), but any sweets will do in a pinch. But anybody who tells you she likes them is a filthy liar, because liking sweets is weak and girly, as is being afraid of ghosts, which Forte most certainly is not.

I donít see an actual helmet for that visor to be attached to. Is it just glued to her head?

You may have noticed that, even though Forte is an eligible young lady, she didnít get the cutscene I said they all had? Hers is special, and will show up later.

I feel an unfamiliar presence.



Sheís a bit too free with that sword. Public menace, oughtnít be allowed, wonít somebody think of the children.



Oh. It was you, Art. My apologies.

I'm glad I did not cut you down.

Yes. Yes I am also glad. I think I peed a little.


Oh, yes. Where are my manners? My name is Forte.

This is a thing. There was just a montage of Art running around town talking to everybody, introducing himself, explaining his amnesia, and asking if they knew him. Yet nobody ever said who they were apparently, because everybody will introduce themselves when first talked to. At least Forte is the only one to commit aggravated assault in the process.

I serve the holy Lady Ventuswill as her faithful Dragon Knight.

"Dragon Knight"?

Itís sort of like a court jester in plate. Venti keeps her around because sheís amused.

Ah, that's right. You're missing all your memories.


Oh, goodness!


My apologies! I hope I've not spoken too indelicately...

Uh, no. It's okay. Don't worry about it.

Still, it was an inappropriate topic to bring up. I'm sorry.

Erm...anyway. Dragon Knights.

As the name suggests, it is my duty to protect Lady Ventuswill.

...On paper, at least.


The power of a mere human is nothing compared to hers. She hardly requires the help of one.

O-oh...that makes sense, I guess.


I didn't know Venti was that powerful.

Take note that Art isnít supposed to be letting on about his secret friendship with Venti, or that sheís not ALL POWERFUL BOOMING VOICE DRAGON GOD EMPEROR all the time. Art is really loving bad at keeping secrets.

So though I hold the title of Dragon Knight, in truth my duty is to guard this town.

Because clearly Venti needs help guarding one sleepy rural town. Why does a King Dragon God even live here?

Accordingly, if you should have any problems, please feel free to come speak with me.

I will do whatever I can to help.

And she will too. Like I said, only NPC who will adventure with me as casual acquaintances.

Thank you! I appreciate that.

And then, on trying to leave townÖ cutscene power to the max!

Forte has a sword and nice eyes, thatís all we need to know I guess.

Ah, Art.

Are you going somewhere?

There are monsters outside of town, so it's dangerous to be wandering around.


There are angry bipedal sheep that might roll slowly in your direction!


You can avoid them, mostly, but sooner or later you may have to fight.

Meaning...I'd have to...cut them down...?

That's right.


...Can't we all just get along?

Iím a lover, not a fighter. And Iím not even very good at being a lover!

You're sweet, Art.

Huh? N-no, I just meanó

Don't worry.

Defeating monsters doesn't mean you're killing them.


The weapons and farm tools we use have a magic spell called +Tamitaya+ cast upon them.

I kinda like this thing the script did for denoting highlighted text, Iím keeping them in. This spell was called Retornen in previous games, Iím not sure which one I like better. Presumably Tamitaya translates to something, but I know not what.

This +Tamitaya+ prevents our attacks from actually harming the monsters...

...instead sending them to the +Forest of Beginnings+.

The +Forest of Beginnings+?

That's the world in which the monsters live.

They enter our world through roads called gates.

You never REALLY go on a mass murder spree, youíre just sending the poor lost monsters homeÖ wait, this suddenly casts my plan to imprison dozens of monsters in 10x10 barns and force them to do my bidding in a darker light.

I see...

To send them back to the Forest of Beginnings...'ll need a weapon with the +Tamitaya+ spell cast upon it.

Do you have such a weapon in your possession?

Every weapon in the world has that spell, or at least every weapon weíre capable of buying, finding, or crafting. My broadsword is clearly such a weapon (and clearly doesnít work on humans, although sending Soldier and Gangster Soldier to the Forest would have made this a short game.

Looks like you're all set, then.

Still, give this one a try as well. You might like it.

In that case, why not use this one?

Longswords are highly effective, and cover large areas.

You can attack multiple monsters at once, too.

Its downside is the slow swing, which leaves you vulnerable to counterattacks.

So try to anticipate your enemy's moves and use it accordingly.

Honestly, Iíve never been a fan of long swords, hammers, or axes. Quick and efficient weapons like double swords, of big flashy magic, thatís how I roll. Iíll probably try to show off every weapon type at least a little, but Forte just did a good job explaining the basic pros and cons.

Thank you very much!

Weapons are important partners that you entrust with your life.

You should find out for yourself...

...which weapon suits you best.

I will.

I think that does it for the explanations.

However, I must ask you one more thing before you leave.

How confident are you in your own skills?

Hard mode motherfucker. COME AT ME BRO, COME AT ME! The script says that if you choose easy mode, Forte will automatically offer to join your party rather than waiting for you to ask, I didnít think to check unfortunately.

I see.

It seems you're quite confident in your skills.

And I have no reason to doubt that confidence.

But should you require my help, please let me know.

And do take it easy. Don't become overconfident and lower your guard.

Oh, and one more thing.

"When the enemy's strength overwhelms you, gaze upon the trophy in the castle basement."


I'm not sure what it means, but it's a charm we knights have passed down for quite some time.

It means thatís how I change the difficulty if I canít handle hard. I reiterate, come at me. Bro.

Should you become overwhelmed, it might be worth trying.

O-okay. Thanks.

"When the enemy's strength overwhelms you...gaze upon the trophy in the castle basement"?

Was that it? I'll try not to forget.

Now, there is something I'd like to give you, if I may.

Um, is this...?

BREAD. A major food staple of the early to mid-game. Once Iím able to cook and have enough income to buy flour, Iíll be riding the flour > bread > toast train for a long time. Toast is mid HP/RP restorer of choice for a good portion of the game, then tomato juice. By the time tomato juice canít cover my needs, Iíll need some very high end food products.

By eating food, you'll gain benefits such as health restoration and timed skill boosts.

Also, like Clorica said, eating once a day exercises the Eating skill.

These benefits change depending on the type of food you eat.

Don't underestimate the power of a good meal!

Unless you're fully prepared, it's really quite dangerous out there.

All right.

I'll keep that in my mind.

My apologies for being so nosy.

Please, be careful.

Iím not quite prepared to leave town yet, so Iíll go back in. I have a vacant lot that needs to be filled with turnips. Why turnips? Because pineapple is another show.

The general store, on Melody Street, just east of the castle. For all my grocery and vegetable/fruit needs. The town is basically laid out along the four compass points, with the castle and vacant lot in the middle. General store and flower shop in the east, restaurant and inn in the north, blacksmith and clinic in the west, town square where Forte tried to kill me in the south. Various people living various places.

Donít let the kind smile fool you. Blossomís tough as nails.

My, my! How courteous of you.

I'm very pleased to meet you.

The pleasure is mine.

Oh, yes.

We were in such a rush before I forgot to mention that I run a +General Store+.

A +General Store+?


I run it right here out of my home. If there's anything you need, do stop on by.

I will.

And I will too.

Blossom sells a variety of groceries, most of them out of my price range, but Iím not here for those.

Turnip seeds, the only seeds available at the start. Clearly, Iím buying until I run out of money. Thatís twenty bags for those of you who havenít been paying attention.

It still isnít nearly enough, but Iím getting somewhere at least.

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Lunar Suite posted:

Personally, I found some Hot Milk pretty much always maxed out my RP bar, and - well, the heal spell is super cheap so why bother with HP foods?
Good progress! Are you going to make an effortpost about whatever soil levels do? I ended up ignoring them...

I mostly use food to recover RP, and I'm too lazy to rely on barn drops when I can just buy flour and make toast. By the time I'm past that, tomato juice is far superior to most other available options.

And I am planning a detailed post specifically to cover the care and maintenance of soil. Probably once I can reasonably afford a magnifying glass. That one's going to be a damned sight easier than the other big information post I have planned, explaining the nuances of crafting. There are still things we don't know about the crafting system of this game to this day.

sheep-dodger posted:

Also: Spears/Lances all the way!

I suppose I could let people vote on what weapon type they'd like to see me utilize through most the LP. For those of you unfamiliar, that would be:

Short Sword (quick short range attacks in a small front arc and full defense bonus from a shield. Easiest weapon to use)
Long Sword (slower, but longer range, in a similar arc to the short sword, only half defense from a shield)
Axe/Hammer (also slow, and only hits directly in front, but hits like a loving hammer, again, halves shield defense)
Spear (longer range than a long sword, but only in a straight line, half defense again)
Double Swords (Faster than the short sword and covers a similar arc, a bit shorter range, no defense from an equipped shield at all (usually))
Fists (Fastest weapon, but shortest range. Enables throwing and suplexing monsters. no shield defense)
Staves (The mage's tool. You cna use magic without one, but it will be much more effective with a staff, and staves have various abilities of their own, including being able to use boss-only attacks)

Any type is perfectly suitable to use for the entire game (though there are certain areas with magic-immune enemies where a staff would need to be switched out for something else). Feel free to speak up, I'll tally up votes.

MooCowlian posted:

Yeah, healing potions served me just fine pretty much any time I needed help and didn't want to use magic. I did neglect a lot of the crafting though so its entirely possible that that's a terrible choice I made that directly resulted in me doing way more grinding than should have been necessary.

In combat, potions are the way to go. And if you have to do any grinding, then you definitely neglected the crafting system, to your own detriment. Though I've never actually fought the final boss without spending a lot of time running the bonus dungeons first, that does tend to throw a bunch of levels at you.

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

A Tour of Selphia

A little mini-update now that I got my screenshots to offload properly. I described the layout of the town before, but now I can actually show the places I mentioned.

The Sincerity General Store, directly west from the town square. Blossom and Doug live and work here. It doesnít carry much stock now, but as I complete requests, theyíll carry a greater
variety of seeds. Also, any crop I ship becomes available for sale (for an exorbitant price far beyond what Iím paid for produce).

Below the general store is the flower shop, Carnations. Illuminata runs this. Like the general store, the stock is limited at first, and expands as I complete requests. Besides flowers and seeds, Illuminata also sells farming related chemicals such as Greenifier. But no Roundup, despite the weedy mess my vacant lot turns into after a few days.

At the corner of Melody Street and Airship Way, on the left we have the restaurant Porcolineís Kitchen, unsurprisingly run by Porcoline. On the rightis Arthurís office, after he somehow managed to avoid having his kidneys stolen.

Airship Way is so named because of the airship parked here. With a moderately priced license, I can use that airship to teleport to any save point on the main world map.

The Bell Hotel is workpace and home to Xiao Pai and her mother Lin Fa, as well as home to any number of passing travelers, some of whom came all the way from previous RF games. They have a hot spring to bathe in which restores all HP/RP.

South of the hotel is the Housing area, and the blacksmithís shop Meanderer, home of Bado. Badoís selection is too expensive now, and hopelessly obsolete once I can do my own crafting, so I
tend to neglect this place.

Southwest of the blackmithís we have the Tiny Bandage Clinic, owned and operated by Nancy and Doctor Jones. Sadly, Jones is absolutely nothing like Indiana Jones. If you pass out from overwork or being defeated in battle, you will wake up at the clinic, usually minus a percentage of your funds for various medical fees and expenses.

Last, but not least, back on my farm.

The shipping box, my primary moneymaking device. Items I put here will be collected the next morning, and the money will be directly deposited into my pocket.

Even the garbage I picked up in my vacant lot is worth something.

Truthkeeper fucked around with this message at 00:56 on Feb 8, 2016

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Chat up Ladies, Kill Sheep

So, Iíve got some skills, I think I mentioned? They donít appear on the skill list until youíve gained some experience in them, but I have enough at this point to explain a bit.

Some skills are obvious. Weapon skills are clearly labeled, leveling these up increases by damage with that weapon, decreases RP consumed by using that weapon, and increases my RP and Strength, and I gain experience by hitting poo poo with weapons. Elements, such as Water, Earth, Light, and Love, increase my spell damage with that element (or healing, in the case of Love), magic defense, Intelligence, and RP, and decrease RP consumption of spells. Besides the obvious using magic to increase its relevant skill, some magic skills can be trained be mundane tasks. Watering crops increases the Water skill, planting seeds increases Love, and tilling the farm increases Earth. I have no idea how I gained experience in Light.

Some of the more unusual skills you may have seen at the bottom of the list. Walking is self-explanatory, and increases maximum HP and RP, and vitality. Farming decreases the RP cost of all farm tools while increasing max HP/RP, and is trained by using farm tools. Throwing increases strength, vitality, and attack power (which is already directly increased by strength, so having both feels redundant), and is increased by throwing items at monsters, or throwing other monsters at them. Defense increases HP and vitality, which increases defense power, and increases from getting hit. Leadership increases strength and intelligence, and the attack and defense of your entire team, and increases by talking to NPCs and from taking them adventuring.

Iíll point out other skills as they come. Thereís a fairly hefty list. Besides the methods I mentioned, all skills can be trained by gathering rune orbs which spawn randomly when crops are harvested. A rune orb will increase a random skill by a fairly decent amount of experience, usually enough for a full level at low ranks.

Sometimes, people will have comments when youíve reached certain levels in certain skills.

So I decided to go out and explore the outside a little, but got distracted by NPCs. Like this one.


Voice: Stephanie Sheh


Margaret is the local elf girl, you know, every townís got one, right? She came from a mysterious hidden elf village, and was more or less adopted by the restaurant owner, Porcoline. Sheís a talented musician, skilled with piano, harp, and singing. Her harp music overrides the town BGM if you walk near her while sheís playing, which is a nice touch. She cares a great deal about the town and its people, and often reminds people to take basic safety precautions, and to keep the town clean. Sheís sweet and kind, more mature than many of the other girls (not that thatís difficult), but lacks self-confidence. She has a sister who may or may not be Daria, the local elf girl from RF3. Rating the girls based on attractiveness, Margaret wins hands-down for me (Forte and Dolce tie for second). And she has a pleasant personality, neither dull (Iím looking at you most characters in RF1 and 2) nor annoying (Looking at you here RF3).

In battle, Margaret uses magic fairly effectively, and learns a decently powerful healing spell if youíre dating her.

If you need anything, just let me know, okay?

I will. Thanks.

Oh, that's right! You are a Prince, aren't you?

Is it too impolite for me to call you just Art?

No, that's fine. I don't mind at all.

Hee hee! Great! ♪ Art it is, then.

I would not have expected there to be a music note character, but I guess fonts these days are prepared for anything. Good thing Iím not trying to OCR these screenshots anymore.

Oh, and you can just call me +Margaret+. Not that you'd call me anything else, but still!

I might call her Meg, as that is a nickname people close to her often use. Iím not allowed to until weíre dating though. Inappropriate, I guess?

Of course.

This town is pretty big. I hope you aren't getting lost.

No, I'm fine.

Oh, and try not to walk around too late at night, okay? It can be dangerous.

Yeah, Iím still wondering how Arthur managed to avoid getting mugged, murdered, or sucked into an underground game of Magic: the Gathering.

Um, okay...

And! And! Be careful of this other thing, too! Oh, there are so many things I worry about!

I never pretended the girl was perfect, just my favorite of the bunch. And then we have Xiao Pai, who I ran into on the opposite end of town.

She does in fact fall butt first onto the camera, somehow.


Xiao Pai
Voice: Janice Kawaye

Hotel Worker and Bathing Specialist

I actually immediately recognized this one as the voice of Gi from Captain Planet, even though she sounds very different. Iím not really familiar with most of the stuff sheís done in the intervening decades though. Xiao Pai is the gameís attempt to tap into every manís well known fetish for cute and clumsy girls. Because thatís totally a thing, the media I consume keep telling me so. On the plus side, she has an actual personality beyond being cute and clumsy, and works hard at the local hotel/bathhouse. She looks young enough to be questionable, but is mature enough that I wouldnít feel like a kiddy diddler. I just donít like her very much though, the cute and clumsy routine is a bit of a turnoff. Maybe itís a cultural thing, are Japanese guys into that? She has an odd speech pattern, because sheís spent a good portion of her life living in Not-China and hasnít lived in Norad very long, and has trouble with the structure, grammar, and idioms of Probably-Not-English. Sheís also the only person in town with two living parents, which I find very suspicious. Her mother owns and operates the hotel, and her father is a traveling salesman.

Xiao Pai uses axes in battle, which is kind of funny to watch, and she uses them fairly well. Watching her trip while fighting is less funny, but she eventually develops a special attack based on tripping. Her favorite gifts are crystal and emery flowers, which take a very long time to grow I usually have much more important things to do with them flowers and Asian food are also acceptable gifts

She has a panda bear hair thing, because CHINA.

Aha! Art.


No, this would be too soon, I think.

But there is no hurry. Take your time and you will find your place.

Thank you.

Oh, um, by the way...


May I ask your name?

...Oh? This isn't the first we've met, yes?

Can't you remember?

Um, it's hard to remember a name I haven't been told yet.


Well, don't worry about it. This happens all the time.

After all, I don't even get my name added to gift exchange drawings...

No, I told you, it's not that I forgot!


I was just so busy thinking about my own problems that I forgot to ask for a proper introduction.


So I don't think we've properly introduced ourselves.

Now that you mention it, I do seem to remember it being Clorica who told me your name.


Oops! Ha ha, it seems I was a little clumsy, much like Mama. Sorry.

] Oh well. This happens all the time, too. Don't worry about it.


But anyway, I'm pleased to meet you.

Oh, uh, yeah. Nice to meet you, too.

Why thank you!



So, um...your name?


My name is Xiao Pai.

Mama and I live in the inn that's in the north part of town, yes?

It's good to meet you!

Glad to meet you, too.

The cute but clumsy and forgetful schtick is just so played out. Give me a warrior obsessed with the appearance of strength or the slowly defrosting icy girl any day!

On the other hand, now we know that Art didnít learn anybodyís name or tell anybody his name, he just ran around like an idiot asking if they knew him. Best first impression ever.

Having met all of the local available women (for now), I swing by the blacksmith to check out the prices on some equipment.

Hi. And you are?

Iím Art, itís nice to meet you.

Badoís kind of a dick.

I'm Bado. I operate the forge.

But forging stuff is really exhausting, so I don't do it too much.


So, have you remembered anything yet?

I'm afraid not.


Well, how about you try buying this, then?

What is it?

Memory recovery medicine.

Seems legit. I should buy this and find out the answers this game is hiding from me.


How much?!





All I wanna do is make lots of money without working much.

But y'know, I've never really liked taking advantage of people, either.

Well, Guardians of the Galaxy taught me that no one is 100% an a-hole. Heís a really lovely con-man though. Whatís the point of conning people if you feel too bad about it to follow through?

So don't go falling for great deals that sound too good to be true, okay?



Well, hopefully heís a better blacksmith than he is a con-man. Letís check out the wares.

drat right you will. If you donít work, you donít eat. The magical dragon god king told me so by proxy!

This weapon and armor selection is pathetic, and his farm tools arenít any better. I might buy one weapon from Bado, I believe he starts selling basic gloves and staves after the first dungeon, but after that, itís all crafting all the time!

So, Iím disappointed with that crappy selection of stuff I couldnít have afforded anyway. Iím gonna go murder the local wildlife. Oh, excuse me, Iím gonna send them back to the Forest of Beginnings. By stabbing and slashing them.

Directly west of the town gate, thereís a patch of medicinal herbs guarded by a single Wooly.


An absolutely deadly predator who will quickly and ferociously devour unwary adventures. These vicious monsters will slowly waddle or roll toward you, and might even deign to slowly headbutt you! Their fur protects them from the first fire spell you try to cast at them, being bruned off in the process. Bald Woolys seem to move and attack faster, but still arenít actually threatening. An enemy Wooly can be sheared, dropping small fur, but itís far better to actually befriend them and put them in your barn if you need wool. Not that I have a barn yet. Woolys drop wooly furballs, small fur, and shears. They drop the very means of shearing them. This is why Bado is useless, even the stuff he has that I might want is easy to come by.

I juggled it around the screen on the end of my sword for a while until it died, and gained some short sword skill in the process. Then I collected the herbs. I could use these to restore health, or sell them, or keep them to use to make healing potions once I have a pharmacy crafting station.

I switched over to the longsword Forte gave me for a bit. This is the range on a standard longsword attack. Slow as balls, but you can cleave through a fair number of monsters with range like that.

Thereís a mysterious well lit tunnel southeast of town. Iím sure it canít possibly be anything of importance and will pay no attention to it.

Directly south of town, and west of mysterious unimportant tunnel, thereís a road block. Ah well, an obstacle like this is clearly impossible to overcome. I guess Iíve explored the entire world now. That didnít take very long at all. Shame the only monsters that exist are Woolys and Iíll never get to fight anything tough or suplex a dragon. Iíve always wanted to suplex a dragon, but I guess Iíll have to make do with sheep. Or maybe the airship. An airship is kinda like a flying train right, I should still be able to suplex it.

Map of the entire known world. Those area where it looks like it connects to other places? Here there be dragons. Yar.

On the plus side, I not-murdered enough sheep to increase my short sword skill until I learned a new attack.

I... canít seem to do this one. Meh, Iíve already got a five swing combo that juggles sheep, thatíll last me a good while.

Sleep now, and dream of large sheep.

Also, take note that the vast majority of my lost RP came from farming, not fighting. Fighting monsters is easy, but it takes a real man to plant turnips in a vacant lot.

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

FredMSloniker posted:

Anyway, I nitpick because I care. Looking forward to your next update!

I like nitpicking. I try to catch the little stuff before I post, but I obviously miss a handful, so I appreciate people catching them for me.

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Tarezax posted:

Oh my god I didn't know RF3 tied marriage into the plot.

Raven is the cutest

Sadly, Raven is canonically forever alone, based on things she says in her cameo appearances in RF4.

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Meet, Greet, and Go on a Killing Spree

So I spent some time wandering around town, ran into a few new faces. Like Porcoline Tulle De Sainte-Coquille.

My name is Porcoline Tulle De Sainte-Coquille.

The Sainte-Coquille family have been a mainstay of the Rune Factory series, a neverending parade of rich goofy fat guys with silly gimmicks. Porcoline runs the town restaurant, which makes a lot of senseÖ until you get to know him a bit and realize itís a terrible idea.

Hi. I'm Art

A pleasure to meet you, Art.

My name is Porcoline Tulle De Sainte-Coquille.

Mr. Sainte-Coquille, youíre trying to seduce me.

Yeah, this is Porcolineís gimmick, he regularly tries to seduce and/or propose to Art. Also, big fat guy eats a lot, hurr hurr durr.

...Um, nice to meet you? (Wow, he's kinda weird.)

I think he and Arthur are the only people in this game with last names.

And then thereís Doug.

This is Doug. I donít like Doug. Why donít I like Doug? Thatís right, because heís a creepy ginger. Also a clean-shaven dwarf, which is even creepier. Sadly, heís one of the more tolerable marriage candidates for the female player character. Poor Frey got the shaft.

Not making a good case for why I shouldnít commit locally-centered genocide.

Um, but...

Has Lest said this often enough to count as his catch phrase? I feel like he has.

I mean it.

Well, if you insist. (Not that I'm actually royalty, but...)

Great! So do you remember my name?

Yeah, itís Urist, right? I mean, youíre a dwarf, itís gotta be Urist. Urist McFilthybeardlessguy.

You do! Awesome. ♪ I'm +Doug+. Don't forget! I work here in the general store with Granny Blossom, if you've met her. We've got lots of stuff, so stop on by and buy something, 'kay? Anyway, it's good to meet you!

If thereís anything respectable about Doug, itís his relationship with Blossom. He takes good care of the old lady, and she in turn loves him like a grandson.

Actually, thereís a lot more families by adoption in this town than there are genetic families. This supports my disaster killing everybodyís parents theory.

Still, never trust a clean-shaven ginger dwarf. Now you canít say this LP has never given you useful advice for day-to-day life.


Voice: Yuri Lowenthal

Beardless Dwarf

Sasuke Uchiha himself, this goes a long way toward explaining my irrational dislike of Doug, his voice associates him with a character I disliked even when I liked the show. Honestly, I rag on him a lot, but Doug's an all-around decent sort. He's a lazy slacker, but he does his best by Blossom, who took him in out of the goodness of her heart when he first wandered into town. This is a common theme in Selphia. Even if I wasn't planning on befriending everybody in town for the LP, I'd befriend Doug anyway. Because you can always shop at the general store if you talk to him while he's in the store, so recruiting him into the party is an easy way to shop outside of business hours. And since he and Blossom have different inventories each day, I can check with Doug if Blossom isn't carrying a specific item I need, rather than waiting for the old lady to go off the clock. Doug has some... interesting conflicts with another character that lead... certain subsets of the fanbase to make... certain assumptions, vis a vis sexuality. Honestly, In much the same way that Margaret is the most human-seeming of the eligible ladies, Doug is the most human of the dudes. Irony, thy name is neither of them being human.

In combat, Doug... isn't very good. He uses one-handed swords half-assedly can can cast the weakest fire spell in the game. With crap Int.

I popped over to see Arthur, who has his own swanky office adjacent to the restaurant now. And finally gets his cutscene.

It was really hard to get a shot of his face here, and gently caress if I know whatís up with the crystal ball and incense. Part time fortune teller?

Ah, Art. This is the first time we've talked here, isn't it?

Yeah, you're right.

Well then, welcome to my office.

You work here?

Yes. Porcoline was kind enough to lend me a room he was not using at the time. And I've just finished moving my paperwork here from the palace.


I work mainly with other stores and businesses. I'm afraid you won't be able to help with most of it. Oh, but there is one thing. Art, are you familiar with the +Harvest Report+?

+Harvest Report+?

A +Harvest Report+ can predict what may be coming. In this geographical area, the predictions are good for about one week. I try to have the next week's report fully prepared by Friday.


I'm sure that can be some very useful information when farming. Would you like a more detailed explanation?

NO! Dear Ventuswill no! No more tutorials! Iíll explain it for you Arthur!


Itís simpler than he makes it sound. Each week, one crop will be a bumper crop, and will produce more units per plant than usual. And one crop will be a poor crop, producing less. I tend to notice plus or minus one vegetable, respectively. Unfortunately, as far as I can tell, this system is bugged, causing it to repeat the information for the current weekís bumper crop for next week, so you canít really use it very well to plant in advance.

Arthur also runs a shop, on top of his thousand other duties. Arthurís shop is unique in that it offers a seemingly random assortment of items (locked by game progress so as to prevent getting late-game equipment or upgrade items), switched out each day. Valuable to me once I have crafting stations and money to burn, since there are no limits to what you can buy and recipe bread is relatively inexpensive. Itís worth checking every day. Also, he trades 3DS play coins for local currency, which can come in handy in a pinch, but I wonít be taking advantage of it. Because all my play coins go to Animal Crossing.

I suppose, with Arthur officially introduced as a marriage candidate, it's time for his blurb.


Arthur D. Lawrence
Voice: Sam Riegel

13th Prince of Norad Kingdom.

I never realized that that was Phoenix Wright himself (well, Dual Destinies came out after RF4, , but it's a rather appropriate voice for Arthur. Arthur is one of those 'royals who do something' types, he's a prince who runs some kind of shipping empire on the side, and on top of that was going to work the farm here before he suckered me into doing it. He isn't he first prince of Norad to show up in this series (the protagonist of the first game is one of his cousins or something), but he is the first interesting one. Arthur could be a legitimately cool character and good love interest for Frey... except for his gimmick. Arthur's gimmick is a love of cute stuff, and it's silly to the point of being annoying sometimes (also, glasses are apparently cute, which is why he collects them). But when he isn't being a goofball, Arthur's a drat fine man to have around. Like DOug, Arthur is worth befriending just to be able to access his store just by dropping him in the party and popping into his office. Arthur's store can make or break the early to mid-game.

Arthur is a staff specialist in combat, and can cast a variety of light and dark elemental spells, and a mid-range healing spell. Sadly, light and dark spells are fairly useless, so I tend to leave him on the bench.

And then I ran into Margaret again.

You seem like someone who'll make some pretty sounds, Art.

Huh? Sounds? (Whaaat is she implying here?)

...Yep, I was right! You definitely have a nice yelp. I can tell that you're a nice person, Art.

F-from just that?!

The sound of a man yelping in main is pleasant. Bitch be crazy yo. I should go back and add that to the write-up on her.

But enough socializing! Letís go check out that mysterious glowing tunnel. Itís still not important though.

These woods are lovely, dark and deep.

(I got a shield)

But I have promises to keep.

And miles to go before I sleep.

Just a couple screens into the forest (the first of many dungeons), we have an insurmountable obstacle! An impenetrable barrier blocks the way forward! Thereís no hope of advancing!

Except for the obvious course of killing all the monsters on this screen, including the gate (the circular thing on the right) that spawns additional monsters.

Yep, miles to go. Or, yíknow, like 20 feet before I get clobbered by a group of ants. This is why Forte is available as a companion from the start. It was stupid of me to go alone. Even if I had made it to the boss, I would have gotten curbstomped.

Still, live and learn.

On being defeated, you wake up in Doctor Jonesí clinic. If Jones greets you, he takes a sizable chunk of your on-hand funds (based on your level, and it can be more than youíve got on you, in which case he empties your wallet). If Nancy greets you, she lets you off with a warning. If you were adventuring with a girl you happen to be dating (or your wife), Jones gives you a 50% discount.

Oh hi Raven, youíre in the wrong game. RF3 is over there on my bookshelf with the other DS games.

Raven is one of three regularly appearing cameo characters from previous RF games. Each of them serves a purpose, Raven sells crafting items, a small stock at first, but any crafting material you ship with a vendor price can randomly appear in her inventory (again, locked to story progress).

Once youíve been to the forest at all, itís all anybody wants to talk about anymore. Everybody has comments, or opinions, or unsolicited advice.

To get away from the forest-talk, I wandered over to the Request Box to see what Eliza has for me today.

This request is from Forte. Looks like the whole town's trying to help you out! Lucky you, I guess. Hmm, let's see...

"Today's request is chopping Lumber." "Lumber is used in building large furniture and extending rooms." "I would like for you to learn how Lumber is produced."

...She sounds stiff even in writing, huh? But, she left you a gift! It's an +axe+. Which would be for...yes, here we go...

"You can make Lumber by chopping up +Stumps+ and +Branches+." "+Stumps+ and +Branches+ can be found on the fields." "First, start by using this axe to make Lumber." "Even if you can't find any +Stumps+ or +Branches+, they will naturally grow over time.Ē

...Did you get all that? When you're done making Lumber, let me know.

Considering that I picked up every branch on the field to hold onto until now, that wasnít hard at all.

Good, you did it. Let me read the rest of Forte's letter.

"Since you'll be using a lot of Lumber, storage is necessary." "So here's what you can use." "A Lumber/Stone Box" "You can pick up your Lumber and place it inside for storage."

A lot of lumber is right. Thereís never as much material in this game as I need. I often devote half my fully expanded farm in the late game just to sitting there letting stumps and rocks build up so I can break them. But thatís another update, way down the line from now.

...That seems to be it. Very dry. But considerate! It seems you can also store "Material Stone" there...but I'll talk about that next time. Oh, by the way! Are you used to taking requests yet? I can give you +two+ per day starting tomorrow, if you want.

Woo, two requests per day. It maxes out at three, which Iíll unlock fairly quickly. Three per day isnít nearly enough, of course, but one works with what one has.

I grabbed Forte, giver of axes, while I was in town, and hightailed it back to the forest. Everything has to go better this time. How much better?

This much better. Thatís a golden cabbage I found in a chest. Itís one of the last vegetables you can unlock. It takes 4 months to grow, and sells for over 11000g. I just tripped over one in the very first dungeon. Lifeís funny that way sometimes. Iím gonna be laughing all the way to the shipping bin.

Art and Forte have both been noting the large numbers of butterflies around here as I progress. They donít do anything, just swarm together and fly deeper into the forest, so Iím sure thereís nothing to worry about.

Forte makes things blow up real good.

This place is taunting me with mineable rocks, before I have access to a hammer. Once I sell my cabbage I can just buy one from Bado, but I canít in good conscience buy something the game is going to give me shortly.

More butterflies, mysterious something. Iím not worried, itís not like the game is going to throw some kind of dangerous butterfly-themed boss at me.

See, itís a cocooned caterpillar. Perfectly harmless!

Until you hit it a few times, turns out it is a butterfly-themed boss. Never could have seen that coming. Amazing plot twist really.


Butterfly Boss of the Yokmir Forest

Ambrosia is one hell of a wake-up call. Iíd forgotten how difficult she can be. Ambrosia has four major attacks, a quick dive and kick, standing still as a sonic attack radiates outward, filling most of the arena and hitting multiple times, a cloud of butterflies that drain the targetís life, healing her, and a short range AOE sleep cloud attack that sets up anybody it hits for the other three. She gets faster when her health reaches critical (approximately 25%, tough Iíve never looked too closely).

My choice of weapon for this fight is the shortsword, the ability to slash and run is worth a lot more than the extra damage and range of the long sword here. Forte uses a longsword to decent effect, but also gets hit by the sleep attack a lot.

So did I win the day? Hell no, we got our asses kicked and I gave it up as a raw deal for now. I donít necessarily approve of grinding, but I do approve of buying more equipment with the sudden wealth Iím about to fall into.

On the plus side though, I had some turnips ready the next morning.


Monsters of the Update

OrcĖ Brutish humanoid with club.
Orc Archer- Equally brutish, but fights at range
AntĖ Deadly in packs, and they only come in packs.
Beetle- Big, beefy, and has a nasty charge attack, but slow enough to not be too difficult to fight.

The full Yokmir Forest. Wow, what an impenetrable labyrinth.

Truthkeeper fucked around with this message at 08:26 on Feb 15, 2016

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Shwqa posted:

There are permanent seasonal fields for each season. Though the spring one is tiny. And then you can expand on your personal farm to three times the size.

Five times the size, but yes, there's plenty of farming space available later one.

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Iím Scared of Butterflies

Defeated by the foul boss of Yokmir, but never for long. So, I stopped by the inn one morning, where they have a reasonably priced public bath. Donít let the presence of a clinic and a doctor fool you, this is where the real healing happens. Lin Fa and Xiao Pai are clearly powerful sorceresses.

Welcome. Oh my. This is the first time you've visited our baths, isn't it, Art?

Please stop by whenever you feel the need for a refreshing break. Oh, I know! Since you are still getting used to life in town, let me give you a special deal. You can use the bath free on your first five visits. A nice, relaxing bath is a lovely way to wash off sweat after a long day farming or adventuring.

Doesnít even let me get a word in edgewise, but free bathing is a pretty good deal. I wonít get to come here for free again after I use these up until I spend 35000 prince points nationalizing the bathcare system.

And then there was Barret, a visitor from RF2.

Not going into any more detail on his cameo than Ravenís, but I guess his time in that game has given him a sixth sense for Earthmates. And the ability to tell me what items have been used to upgrade pieces of equipment I show him. Sort of useful, but the explanation can wait until I break down the crafting system.

The field is almost full (still of turnips, for now). These rocks are stopping me from using the whole thing, and that troubles me.

Eliza has a request for me, from Vishnal. Thereís still not necessarily any proof that Art isnít just imagining the box talking to him, and I think I prefer that interpretation.

"I'd like to request a shipment! First, place one turnip into the Shipping Box in the field. Items in the Shipping Box will all be shipped and paid for the next morning.

He even included a turnip in the letter for me to ship. Foolish butler, Iím the greatest farmer this town has ever seen.

Good, it seems you've done your part. Now remember! Any item placed in the Shipping Box will be shipped at +8:00+ that very morning or the next day. You can learn new things one by one just like this. Before you know it, you'll be a pro at handling requests!
Here, Vishnal sent you a letter.

"Wow, you did a great job! Oh, yes, I asked the general store to increase the variety of seeds they sell. Buy seeds at the store, grow them, and ship out as much produce as you can!" ♪

...And then it ends with... "Let's Happy Farming"?! Must be a joke...

If itís a reference, I donít get it. But I do get a second request, from Clorica.

Thank you sooo much. Now, I'd like to give you this sickle as a thank-you.


And...well, you can also get rid of weeds fairly quickly that way. It's a very useful tool for cleaning the field! ♪

It is indeed a very useful tool, critical for leveling up crops. And higher level crops are higher value crops.

Wow, thanks!

I'm impressed with the work you've done so far, Art. You seem to have really gotten the hang of handling requests from the Request Box!

Th-thanks. That's because Eliza has been helping me out a lot. And you and everybody else too, of course!


Yeah, the Request Box. She's a little wacko, but very helpful nonetheless.

I see. So you even name boxes, huh?


That's kind of cute. Like playing with a doll!

Uh, erm...hmm?

Well, thanks again for your help!

Uh...Hmm...that's weird.... Does Clorica not know about Eliza?

And yet, for some reason, Art isnít willing to bring this up with Eliza yet. Because he doesnít want to accept the fact that heís delusional.

And then I stopped at the Order symbol to pick up a couple licenses. Licenses are a prince point sink required to gain permission to do things like buy crafting stations or fly the airship. Iím picking up a chemistry license and basic cooking license, Iím close to being able to afford a chemistry set and at least one cooking station. Each license requires a short and easy quiz to acquire.

Porcoline likes to describe the cooking stations I can buy with a basic license. No explanation is ever given why I have to keep my knife, my mixer, my empty table, and all my other stations separate (at least at first, a later order will let me combine them into one unit)

Then, Bado had some words of wisdom for me.

Although I can't help you get your memory back... maybe I can offer help in other ways.


You can slowly get your memory back while living in this town.

...That sounds perfect.

Heís a very wise dwarf, when he isnít being stupid.

With the day wasted talking to people, I knocked off early, in hopes in doing more requests the next morning.

Like this one from Margaret.

"Have you gone shopping yet?"

"There are many stores in this town, such as the flower shop and the general store. I want you to try +buying Rice at the general store+, please. If you can't seem to find Rice, try switching shelves. Good luck!"

She even gave me the money to buy the rice. Iíd still rather buy something useful like seeds or tools, but one works with what one is given.

And then I immediately turn 360 degrees and walk into another request, from Kiel (whom I may have missed introducing when I first met him and should rectify that later)..

"And today I'll teach you how to make Material Stone!

And so I was given a hammer and a terrible joke.

It's a +hammer+. You'd best put away that axe, 'cause it's hammer time!

"Material Stone can be made by hitting +Rocks+ and +Stones+ with a hammer. +Rocks+ and +Stones+ can be found in the fields. Try using the hammer to smash them up and collect Material Stone. No worries if you can't find any +Rocks+ or +Stones+ right away. You will, soon enough."

I found one. In my backpack, where Iíve been keeping it until now.

"You'll be using a lot of Material Stone. That's why you'll need to store it. This is where that Lumber/Stone Box Forte gave you will come in handy. You didn't break it, did you? By placing the Material Stone in there, you can store it easily! Hammers also have another important function. And that's +mining+! By hitting the +minerals+ in dungeons, you can get Iron and Bronze. This is called +mining+. If you find a mineral in a dungeon, try hitting it with your hammer.
You will definitely be using Iron and Bronze to make good farm tools and weapons."

Heís not kidding, Iím going to need a lot of both.

Today I picked up my first crafting station, the No Utensils cooking station. Which allows me to throw things together in bowls or on plates. Clearly this requires a specific crafting station and canít be done just anywhere.


Cooking is the easiest form of crafting in the game, but they all follow the same steps. Youíre given a list of your known recipes, and choose to either make one or make something from scratch. Then Youíre given the chance to choose up to six ingredients from your backpack and other storage. If you input the items that correspond to a recipe you know, you make that dish. If you donít know the recipe, but still choose items that make something (like my pickled turnips here), youíll make it, but at a higher RP cost, and learn the recipe. Cooking gets interesting when you add additional ingredients on top of the required ones. As long as itís edible, and doesnít change the recipe to another recipe entirely, any added ingredient will turn ordinary cooked food into a prepared dish, which has a higher value.

More importantly for me right now, cooked food restores a lot more HP/RP than raw food, and gives stat buffs that last a few hours of game time.

The downside? Cooked food doesnít stack.

After my turnip pickling spree, my incessant need to run around talking to random people brought me to Ventuswill.

Good morning, Art.
Good morning, Venti.

How fare your memories?


...I see.

Little by little, yeah.

No, no. You are doing well. Very well. Especially in the fields. The crops you harvest are especially powerful.
Not many can raise crops so bursting with life.

Yes. You have my word on that.


Accordingly... I have a special request which requires a skilled person such as yourself.

What is it?

Yes. I would like for you to explore the Yokmir Forest for me.

The Yokmir Forest?

Art, this isnít Metal Gear Solid.

Yes. There has been a foul air about the place recently.

Me? I...


Erm, whatever the case, you are the one best suited for the job.

Well obviously. After all, Iím the God Dragon Emperor King Supreme round these parts.



Because you possibly have the best...aptitude, should I say?


Anyway! You are the one most fit for the mission! It is likely to be difficult, but will you do it for me?

All right.

I kinda already did it, but she wants the boss defeated too I suppose.

So you will! Excellent! I knew I could count on you, Art! ♪ Go on, then! I know you will not fail me!

So now I have marching orders. Explore the Yokmir Forest or die trying! But first, fishing!

Because the magical talking box said so.

Vishnal is looking for fish.
So I've prepared something especially for you.
It's a fishing pole.
Let me explain how to +go fishing+.

When you spot a fish, equip a fishing pole and press B while facing it. You might scare away the fish if you hit it with a float, though, so be careful. Once the fish notices the float, it'll start poking at it. When it bites, you'll hear it yanking at the pole...and that's when you press B! As long as you press it at the right moment, it shouldn't be very difficult to score a catch. You should go give it a try!

And so I did. Dragon Lake is west of Selphia, just past the clinic. Fishing is dull. It was absurdly profitable in RF3, so they went a little overboard nerfing it in 4. There are certain useful items that can be acquired through fishing, and I want a complete shipping list, so Iíll have to do a fair amount of it.

My, my, it's the very fish I'd requested! Thank you so much! Please, take this as a reward.


Let's try this. Have you ever heard the Request Box talking?

Th-the Request Box?! Erm, I...can't say that I have.

I see...

Oh, I'm truly sorry, but I must be off!

All right.

Thank you again for the fish! Goodbye!

Lest isnít doing a very good job of hiding his delusion from others. And yet he still doesnít want to bring it up with Eliza until he completes more requests.

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Blind Duke posted:

(There is no massive worthwhile reward in the mirror dungeons)

The Sharance Maze has plenty of worthwhile rewards, the trick is doing it properly. By which I mean wearing a rosary when you enter, which eliminates all of the regular monsters and the mazes, turning it into a high level boss rush where you can gather crafting materials and recipe bread.

Besides that, it drops a variety of high level items and recipes. For most people, it's the only way they ever get pineapple juice to complete their request log (I will obviously be showing off the more annoying, difficult, and time consuming way to do it).

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

mastersord posted:

Don't use the Rosary if you're looking for equipment. Chests only spawn in normal rooms that are not the start or the boss room in randomized dungeons.

This is true, I was using the Rosary-boss rush point as one example of how the maze is rewarding.

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Does Whatever a Butterfly Can

Wait, they make rare ones?

I once spent hours trying to fish one of these up with no success. This playthrough I got one early. But thatís another update, far in the future, with the other advanced crafting details. I just thought it was funny that I got one so early and Iím going to be sitting on it forever now.

As per usual, I spent a good portion of the day wandering around talking to people.

State your busi--!! ...Oh, it is you. Don't sneak up on me like that. What is it?

I just came to talk.

I could also have accused her of slacking here, in which case the conversation would turn toward Venti blaming Art for her being lazy.

Oh! Well, your timing is excellent, as I have no plans for the moment. I'll gladly have a cup of tea with you. It takes more effort than you might realize to speak like this all the time.

Well...then don't! No one's going to hold it against you if you speak naturally.

I like talking with you because I don't have to put on airs. I can just be myself. Listen up, Art. This is important for you to remember too. Never lie to yourself. Always true to who you are.

With a hammer, Iím able to break rocks. Besides finally clearing the ones in the field (and I have progressed to growing three, yes THREE kinds of crops in my field now, turnips, potatoes, and spinach, turnips are the only one worth a drat because I can cook them to increase the value)Ö

ÖI can also break rocks away from the farm. Scattered around the overworld and in dungeons are dark colored rocks with yellow flecks. Those are minable rocks, which give metal or gems when broken. A rock tinged with other colors, like the purple one I broke here, has a higher chance of returning a gem.

Like the amethyst here. Otherwise, these low level rocks and my low level mining skill mostly give iron (the basic metal Iíll need a ton of to start grinding forging and crafting skills) and scrap iron (pretty much entirely worthless, but it works well enough for skill grinding).

Yeah, thatís it. Nothing else happened worth mentioning.

Well, I guess there was one other thing.


You know youíve fought a boss when it takes thirty seconds to die while explosions fill the screen. Thereís an easily exploited glitch here. Bosses give 20 prince points when you kill them, and you get those points as soon as you land the killing blow. But the game doesnít count the boss as being dead until it finishes exploding. So you can land the last hit, get your points, then teleport out mid-explosion, leaving the boss available to fight again the same day, thus grinding PP very quickly.

And then there was a girl in place of the butterfly monster. Because.

Did that monster just turn into...a girl...?


Are you okay?!


Are you hurt?


What's wrong?

...You have...a funny face...

Huh? What?! Hello? Can you hear me? She's asleep... But why did a butterfly suddenly turn into a girl?

And more importantly, why is this girl, who appears all of about 10, a marriage candidate? And why doesnít Doug have a beard?

You may think thatís a non-sequitor, but it makes perfect sense to ask, because he just showed up.

Doug? Why are you here?

Oh, I was just walking by. But forget about me for a sec... Who's this?

I have no idea. A monster I was fighting suddenly turned into a girl... assuming I didn't just dream the whole thing...

Monsters turning into humans? I've never heard of such a thing.

Yeah, I don't get it either.

I wonder what the heck is going on here... Doesn't seem to be injured, at least. Not on the outside, anyway.

Should I take her back to town?

I guess so. Let's have Jones look at her.

He may lack a beard, but he speaks wisely, so weíll forgive him for now. Maybe he was caught in a tragic hair remover accident or something, itís not polite to make sport of the manís condition.

This would be a bad time for Jones to reveal that he got his medical degree from a box of cereal. Would explain a lot though.

What do you think?

She's a bit debilitated, but nothing critical. She should wake up in a bit.

I see... That's good to hear.

She...was a monster, you say?

That's right.

Why did a monster...? ...I suppose if I start asking questions now, I'll never stop. And it won't do any good anyway. So let's wait for her to wake up, then see what she has to say.

That sounds good, yeah.

Have you told Lady Ventuswill about this?

Not yet.

Could you go and tell her now? We need to continue monitoring her, at least for a little while.

Understood. I'll go right now.

So thatís one more girl added to Artís ever-increasing harem. If anybody needs me, Iíll be over in the corner, feeling kinda icky for being associated with this.

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Zanzibar Ham posted:

Are all the bosses going to turn into people, or is this girl a special case?

Well now, that would be telling.

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Ah, but you forget, the God Emperor King Dragon Mayor is kinda useless.

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

It's not that Stardew Valley is a bad game, because it's not, it's great. It reminds me a lot of the original Harvest Moon, and more than a little of Harvest Moon DS.

There's just nothing special to distinguish it, it's a Harvest Moon clone, and not a particularly special one.

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Huh, I'm alive. Imagine that.

The Fertilizer Hits the Windmill

Alright, I dropped off a butterfly-monster-turned-lolicon at the local clinic. Obviously, my next cou0rse of action is to go talk to an inanimate object. Has anybody checked Artís medication recently?

This time your request is from Margaret. She wants you to learn how to use fertilizer.

Iíll forgive the scatological implications, but only because I desperately need this bin. Heavy farming depletes soil levels, and until Iím rich enough to literally throw corn and four leaf clovers into the dirt, fertilizer is how Iím going to stay in the game.

Also, itís technically compost, so no actual scatological implications here.

Let's see...

"Have you been growing vegetables? If you constantly keep growing crops in the same soil, that soil's quality will slowly deteriorate. That's where a +Fertilizer Bin+ should come in handy! You'll be using various grasses as fertilizer. By keeping enough grass in the Fertilizer Bin, the soil's quality will improve. Oh, and even if you run out, as long as you let the soil rest, the quality will slowly improve. That's all. Nothing to it, right?"

Yeah sure, but thatís valuable crop growing time with the field left bare. I tried doing a crop rotation thing for a while where I only use two thirds of the field while the last third is left to recover, but that only works if youíre only growing one kind of crop (or many crops that all have the same growth time), and is mostly a pain in the rear end. Once I have all the fields unlocked, I will literally dedicate one just to growing weeds for composting.

...And there you have it. Well, why don't you try placing different types of grass in the Fertilizer Bin?

And so I did, and there was much rejoicing. The fertilizer bin gets to sit off to the side of my main field. One thing I think Iíve failed to mention is that every piece of furniture is breakable (although it takes a few hits), so itís better to keep stuff where youíre less likely to hit it by accident.

Okay, the actual reason I came back this way was to see Venti, hitting the request box was just on the way.

So how did it go?

Well, I was attacked by a monster... and when I defeated it, it turned into a human girl. Do you know whó

Not really sure I would use the word human to describe herÖ but weíll get to that later.
What?! Are you serious?!


W-where is she?!

This reaction isnít suspicious at all. Perfectly normal.

She's at the clinic, sleeping

Or comatose, I did beat her to within an inch of her life. really happened...

What...happened, exactly?

N-nothing! Just...mumbling to myself.

I couldn't believe that creature I'd been fighting just moments before was now a human being! If you knew something like this was going to happen, you should have said something.

I'm sorry. I wasn't sure how things were going to play out, honestly. ...What about your memory?

So far...still nothing...

Masterful change of subject there Venti. Art suspects nothing, and neither do we!

I see. Regarding the girl you saved... I believe the power of the Earthmates is responsible for what transpired.


It's a name given to people with a very rare talent.

So rare that only Rune Factory protagonists have it. (Except Micah from RF3, heís just the product of bestiality)

And it's the reason I thought you might belong to the royal family.

Not entirely unreasonable, Raguna from RF1 was an Earthmate and tangentially related to the royal family. Maybe. Probably.

I had no idea a power like that even existed, much less that I had it in me...

I've been asking for your help because of that gift of yours. Though I wasn't certain of anything until you fixed the problem in the forest. Hmm? What's wrong?

Who am I? What am I...?

Itís been a few weeks since he acquired amnesia, I guess itís finally settling in that he has no past. Having an identity crisis is probably perfectly normal.


Getting attacked by strange people in the form of monsters...and apparently bearing the power of an Earthmate...It's all so surreal. Like I'm a stranger to myself.

I wish I could shed some light on the mystery. But there's only one thing I can say with any certainty. And that's...that you are who you are. I haven't known you for very long, but I already have a firm sense of what you represent. I know I'm the very person who's been asking for your help since you've arrived...but you managed to handle both of my requests and tasks as a model Prince.


I'm sorry. I'm...not good at this sort of thing. I wish I could word it all a little better.

No, it's quite all right.

Alright, crisis resoved.


Having no memories is a little scary...But your words have definitely made me feel a lot better. So thank you.

...Glad to hear it. So, about the girl... She hasn't woken up yet, has she?

No. Jones told me that she should wake up fairly soon, though.

Then I guess we'll just have to wait until she does.


But, what will you do then?

Don't worry. I told you before, right? The people of this town are warm and caring. They'll welcome her no matter what.


What's wrong? Are you still worried about something?

No. I was just marveling at your optimism.

What? It's not optimism, it's faith! Pure, unwavering faith in the people of Selphia!

...I suppose.

I poke a lot of fun at this game, but Lest is absolutely right, the people of Selphia are pretty damned awesome. They are both excellent to each other and know how to party on. Dudes.

Though that may sound weird coming from an outsider like me...

What are you saying? You're a member of our town just like anyone else here.

Huh? don't want to be...

No, no, of course I do!

I just...might have to leave once my memory comes back...

Hasnít happened to any of the other RF protagonists, so youíre probably safe.

Even then, you'll still be a member of this community. You're family now. Think of it as your second hometown, and know that you're always welcome here.

But if you leave weíre giving your farm to the bug girl and making her Princess. Ventuswill help us all.

Okay. Thanks...

I'm the one who should thank you for helping me.

I feel bad accepting all of these kind offers.

Then you can start by apologizing for falling on my head.

Ahaha... Sorry about that!

...That was just a joke. There's no actual reason for you to apologize. Anyway, you must be awfully tired today.
Get some good rest.

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Kallev posted:

Nice to see you alive. So does the fertilizer bin act like you hoed a weed into each 2x2 patch of a field? It seems to drain inconsistent amounts of fertilizer from my bins, and I'll confess I've been too lazy to do any extensive testing on it.

The general consensus is that it's a steady 3 fertilizer per field per day. Which I swear, much like you said, it has never seemed that consistent to me.

It's not quite as effective as tilling dead grass into each square, but it is a small steady boost. The difference becomes very clear later, as I'll show when I start using the seasonal outdoor fields.

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Beans Beans Theyíre Good For Your Heart

It's a lot of fun, but there is a whole big mess to clean up after.

Rune Factory 4 has the best festivals, because nearly all of them involve actually doing something, as opposed to just being an excuse to talk to everybody in town for some boring dialogue. The bean toss contest involves getting hit by beans. Iíll explain more when we get to it.

But letís sit down and talk about something else right now. I believe I promised you guys an in-depth look at DIRT!

So in depth, weíre using a magnifying glass.

Okay, last time we talked briefly about how farming uses up soil and fertilizer restores it. These are the actual soil (and crop) statistics.

Crop LV: The level of the crop. Usually but not always equal to the level of the seeds you planted, depending on Quality. Cutting down a fully grown high Quality crop with a sickle can give higher level seeds than those planted.

No (Number): Unintuitive, ainít it? This is the number of vegetables and or fruits youíll harvest from this particular crop. Depleted soil will reduce the yield.

Grw (Growth): How far the current crop has grown. Iíve been known to rage at 99% crops not being done when I need something in a hurry.

HP: The health of the crop. Crops can be damaged if you accidentally whack them with your axe (while a sickle or sword or cut them down outright). Reducing a plantís HP to 0, shockingly enough, will kill it.

Soil (some of these arenít listed here because I only screenshotted a tile with a crop growing in it):
Overall: a rough average of all the tileís stats, giving you an idea how good one tile is compared to another. Very rough.

Spd (Speed): A bonus to growth rate, this one has the least information available about how it works

Ql: Quality, a stacking boost to crop level. Raising this stat is key to leveling up your crops. Since it stacks on the crop each day, leveling up crops with longer growth times becomes a little easier (but still a pain in the rear end). This stat is increased by using Greenifier or Greenifier+ on the tile)

No (Number): Nobody is entirely clear on how this one works either, but it gives a rough bonus to crop yield

Sz (Size): You can dump chemicals on your soil to make crops planted in 2x2 squares grow into one giant crop instead. This stat is increased with Giantizer, and lowered by Minimizer. A size stat lower than 1 will make your crops tiny, reducing their yield.

Grw (Growth): I just love how they reused abbreviations to make this extra confusing. This one is growth bonus, a direct multiplier to the cropís growing speed (it can go below 1, to a minimum of 0.1 (10x longer growth time) and maxes out at 5 (5x faster growth). Formulas A, B, and C directly increase this stat. Many crops also have seasons they prefer to grow in, which seem to give a flat 50% boost on top of this.

Health: This is the main stat affected by overuse. My best guess based off my observations is that lowered health directly lowers the other stats, and that Health is restored by time passing with the square unused, moreso with fertilizer. Increases rapidly when withered grass, corn, or four leaf clovers are tilled into the ground, affecting a 2x2 area.

Def (Defence): Storms can pass through and destroy crops, replacing them with rocks, branches, or stumps. Defence protects you from that. Like many stats, this one is based on health, but can be increased by adding Wettable Powder to the tile.

Most of those chemicals are purchased from your friendly neighborhood Monsanto representative the flower shop. They can all be crafted using the chemistry set.

But thatís enough about farming, letís take another request.

"In order to mine, you have to use the hammer to hit minerals Minerals look like stones, and can be found outside of town and within dungeons. Do your best, and try to snag some quality iron!"

...Got all that? When you finish mining iron, come talk to me.

Simple enough, Iíll get to it shortly. But first, our favorite butler has some words to share.

Heíll have a description to give for every festival. Iím still not clear on how he goes about predicting a winner, heís usually pretty accurate about who will win if I donít, but he isnít always right.

Now then, allow me to explain the rules for the Bean Toss Contest. Art, you shall play the part of a demon, and others will throw beans at you. Getting hit by green beans will give you points, while brown beans will give you even more. And if you allow yourself to be hit by the rare pink beans, well... AHEM! Pardon me, but that part is a secret. The more times you're hit in a row, the greater the number of points you will receive. However, if you're hit by a solid Failed Dish, you will lose all your points. In short: Allow the beans to hit you. Do not be hit by a stray Failed Dish. That is all.

Green Beans worth a few points. Brown Beans worth more points. Pink Beans worth a whole bunch of points. Each hit is worth the value of the bean that hit you plus whatever you got the last time you were hit. Failed Dishes reset your score to 0. Itís possible to recover after getting hit by a Failed Dish, but really loving hard.

This festival is weird. Fun, but weird. Next time, Iíll show it off.

BUT WAIT! Wasnít there a new character?

Remember Art, if you take sexual advantage of her, you're going to burn in a very special level of hell. A level they reserve for child molesters and people who talk at the theater.

How...are you feeling?

I'm okay.

Glad to hear it. I'm Art. What's your name?

My name is Amber. ÖWaitÖ

All of a sudden, Iím much less concerned with Art going to the special hell.'re the one who saved me, then...

And then she pulls an ounce of maturity out and Iím right back to being worried.

Erm...I guess? (Funny face?)

Wow. Well, thank you very much.

You're...very welcome. But why were you out there?

Hmm... I'm not really sure. Really. My name is just about the only thing I can remember.


And now the boyís found a kindred spirit. Ventuswill help us all.

I feel like I'm forgetting something really important, though. Hmm... ... Oh well.

"Oh well"?

If I can't remember, there's nothing I can do about it, right? So, no sense dwelling on it!

I do like that attitude. But again, absolutely no concern that she might have had an actual life prior to being a weird butterfly monster being beaten to death by an amnesiac fake-prince.

Not a sentence I get to say very often. Rune Factory is weird.

Th-that's true, I guess...

Yep! ♪

So, what are you going to do now?

Now? Well...

There's no need to worry!

And now Illuminata is here. Look, I like having attractive elven women wherever possible, but how and why?

What's your name?

It's Amber.

A pleasure to meet you, Itsamber. And may I say, that's quite an unusual name you've got!

Feel free to insert your own Abbot and Costello joke here.

No, Lumie, her name is Amber.

Oh, I see. Amber, huh? Listen, Amber.


Why don't you come stay with me?

...Hmm? That's a good idea.

Th-that's kinda sudden...

Yes, please, listen to the brain damaged man masquerading as royalty! He is the voice of reason!

Crap, I didnít beat all the butterfly out of her! Quick, somebody get Forte down here, I need a meatshield! Somebody get ready to torch the building if I die, we canít let her escape into the town!

Okay, I will! ♪

Whaaa...? Wings?!

How could I leave an interesting girl like her all alone? You, my dear, may call me Lumie.

Lumie, do we need to have a chat about the special hell?

Lumie! ♪

Good. Now, I'll show you the way home. Come, follow me!

All righty! ♪

And just like that, another eligible young lady has joined the cast. Harvest Moon and Rune Factory girls tend to look kinda young, but there is no way in hell that girl is older than 12. I need to go wash the icky from my soul now.

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Rastan Beeza posted:

I've always wondered if Amber just sprouts butterfly wings from nowhere, or if she keeps them hidden.

I still wonder why Illuminata isn't. She's an adult in charge of her own shop, at least.

Every Rune Factory game has one hot unavailable unmarried woman. It's tradition at this point.

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

The More You Eat the More You Punch Things In the Face

I should really give a quick status update at the beginning of these things. This sums things up pretty well I think. 9 days in, the first dungeon complete, a nice bit of change in my pocket, wood and stone stockpiles are piling up. Iíll need a lot more prince points, but now that Iíve beaten the poo poo out of Amber, I can rekill her once per day for 20 points each time.

It takes a while to build up enough points to do anything useful.

So what does Amber think about her new situation? Going from being a giant butterfly monster to living with hot elf Holmes must be a bit of a shock.

It's the funny-face person! ♪

Um, it's Art.


My name. It's Art.

... Ohh!

...Do you understand now?

Yep! I finally get it.


So, um, Art?

The girl can learn!



For what?

So...thank you.

You're welcome.

Oh, and... I'm really glad to meet you!

Same here!

Sheís a cute kid with a good heart. But I feel I must emphasize KID!

So, a while back, before my mysterious hiatus, we took a little informal vote about weapons. A lot of people wanted to see me punch and suplex my way through this game.

Arthur has heard you apparently. Iíll show this off in a bit, but first, we have business to take care of. Bean Business.

And this year's favorite to win is--- She who is cleverly clumsy, Xiao Pai!

Gee Mr. Volkanon, thanks for the vote of confidance.

So the Bean Toss contest. Itís loving hard. As long as you avoid getting hit by a failed dish, you can usually score decently, but decent doesnít cut it, Itís possible to outrun a failed dish, you move very slightly faster than the dishes and beans move. But if youíre running from dishes, you arenít getting pelted by beans. Iím in this for prizes. I need to get hit a lot.

This is the basic layout, 3 villagers stand at the top and throw beans or failed dishes, either straight or at a 45 degree angle. They can throw multiple projectiles at once, and throw more rapidly as time passes.

The last ten seconds is kind of a mad blast of beans and plates flying everywhere.

The contest has ended! I shall now announce the results. In third placeÖ

I like the little drumroll that rolls just before he announces each of these. I like it because I imagine Venti is drumming on the floor behind him to make it.

MrrngÖ and I was so close too!

No man, you really werenít. Although he scored better than I did in my first attempt tonight.

I could have done better, but I guess I was having an off night. Iíll do better next time. I think my personal best was around 14000, several playthroughs ago.

Iíd hoped for first, but Xiao Pai apparently wanted it a lot more. This was my best attempt after 5 tries.

These events get harder with each passing year, so Iíll have to work harder to beat it in Year 2.

Well done, everyone! Don't forget to bring your prizes home.

These prizes are less than impressive though. The juice is a glass of juice, nothing special. The boots are worthless. The cooking bread has some value, being how I learn new cooking recipes. First place would have netted me a bigger stack of bread and a random stat increasing item.

Well, guess thatís it, Nothing else to see here, right?

Well, I guess there was that one other thing.

The basic glove move is a punch, barely visible really. I have 5 points in fists skill, so I can execute a 4 move combo ending in a jump-kick, but I had too much trouble screenshotting that, Iíll try and get one another time. What you came to see is this.

Enemies are stunned after you suplex them, so you can chain that over and over again. Except anything it works on will usually be dead after one or two hits.

Truthkeeper fucked around with this message at 02:43 on Jun 8, 2016

Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Zagglezig posted:

You've got this set up as a link, rather than an image.

Thanks for pointing it out, I thought I caught all of those. A valuable lesson in why I should never leave the URL parse checkbox checked.

Zanzibar Ham posted:

Wrestling is more about the collateral damage than the target, really. Does some good AoE. At least in 3, but I assume they'd keep it or build on it.

Very true, and it makes up for the fists otherwise lacking ability to hit multiple targets (usually, but wait until I start showing off fancy weapon upgrades in Act 3). But I find enemies tend not to be polite enough to group up enough for me to hit more than one with whatever I'm slamming.

As much as the collateral damage, I'd say the ability to keep some monsters stun-locked is it's own reward. It's pretty much how I manage to beat Maze bosses at early levels, combined with a high critical hit boost.


Nov 29, 2010

Friends don't let friends borrow on credit.

Very true Mastersord, but that's cheating and I will not abide by it. Until I change my mind and decide it's perfectly okay.

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