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stop the gassing This poll is closed. |
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| mods knew |
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267 | 55.39% |
| goku |
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215 | 44.61% |
| Total: | 343 votes | ||
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Here's a timeline: 2013-2014 - Charming man in rural Alabama (Doobie) has a successful hot dog cart/trailer thing. Wants to upgrade so he makes a kickstarter - The SomethingAwful Forums gets wind of it, decides it's a good cause, and raises him 300% of the money he requested (~$14,000). Of particular note, mods Noni and Soundmonkey champion the gently caress out of him and vouch for his good character - Instead of making the most kick-rear end hot dog cart ever, Doobie decides to enter the restaurant game (which has a 93% failure rate) and rents a literal shack. - Doobie ran a second kickstarter, and his anger at "bad froggers" seemed to start shortly after it failed. Basically, he acted like SA was screwing him over for not giving him more money and becoming skeptical of his abilities after he spent 3x his original asking amount and still was nowhere close to opening [thanks to kuddles for this edit] - Doobie renegs on almost all his kickstarter promises. Even simple stuff like making a relish dog and calling it the frog dog. Responds to all complaints by being a smug jerk. - Doobie proceeds to fix up the shack so it is serviceable, selling his truck and his boat to afford these updates. Oh, I forgot to mention he rented it sight unseen so there were lots of revelations like flooding during rains and no vent hood. - Sometime during this period, Doobie joins a White Pride facebook page. Also makes a few questionable comments, like claiming "some black lady" had hacked his twitter when someone had merely posted a photoshopped version. - Doobie sets up said shack with no signage, bathrooms, or parking, across the street from a fully functional Subway restaurant. Fills no ads, counting on "trucker CB chatter" to fuel demand for his hotdogs. - Doobie announces his hours, including 10-3 PM mondays and wednesdays, and closed Sundays - Doobie reveals his menu, which looks like it was created by a schizophrenic with Parkinson's:  2014-2015: Doobie refuses to stop doing retarded poo poo and/or engaging something awful long enough for this whole this to blow over: - Claims he's talking to lawyers to sue people for... giving him $15K or talking crap about him or something I'm not really sure - Gets overwhelming support for Hamburger steak special, refuses to make it any time except after 3 PM on Fridays. That's not an exaggeration, literally after 3 PM on Fridays - Show up in goonchat and acts pretty alright - Wife goes crazy when gay marriage is legalized. Both post pictures of gay flag on fire and call the employers of every gay person they can find - Constantly runs out of food - Complains about price of food, which he is buying at full retail price - Post incredibly awful pics of food with burnt parts, ridiculously small portions, and customers who look like they don't want to be photographed - Holds classic car show at his restaurant the same day the town is holding a separate event featuring free hot dogs. - Closes during Fourth of July, easily the most popular day for hotdogs in America And so on at least 1-4x per month. For a while there, it felt like every time SA was between doobie threads, or over the whole ordeal, he would step up his frogger-hating game until he got the negative attention he craved. Also, several mods go temporarily insane trying to parse the situation, and GBS 1.0 is scrapped because the tightly regulated forum obviously didn't work if it could crap out something so unbelievably atrocious 2016: - Claiming business is booming, doob learns that owner is maybe thinking of selling building. Doob closes restaurant immediately, and closes auto business across street which had literally nothing to do with the building - Tries to sell all his stock on facebook - Doobie's mom, upon learning that her son's dreams have been dashed and he is broke and jobless, consoles him. OH, no, wait, she actually tries to guilt trip him into giving her some of his bar stools for free - Doobie vents his anger towards somethingawful. He and his mom rant about how stupid its users are, missing the complete irony that the site is literally the only reason he had a restaurant in the first place. Drunk Nerds fucked around with this message at 03:10 on Jan 26, 2016 |
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Jan 25, 2016 06:03
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No. 6 posted:What lesson did Doobster learn? Nothing is ever your fault. When things go wrong, you can just blame the hand that feeds you and go cry with your mother.
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Jan 25, 2016 18:19
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kuddles posted:You forgot to add the part where, shortly after the vent hood fiasco, he actually ran a second kickstarter, and his anger at "bad froggers" seemed to start shortly after it failed. Basically, he acted like SA was screwing him over for not giving him more money and becoming skeptical of his abilities after he spent 3x his original asking amount and still was nowhere close to opening. Oh yay, I didn't realize the connection there. I edited this into my timeline post. Thanks!
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Jan 26, 2016 03:12
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I also enjoyed the mod-frustrating paradox, where closing the thread due to no new content would make doobie do something content-worthy.
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Jan 26, 2016 04:01
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