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This thread is meant as a place to nominate and discuss the worst matches of all time. To start, I’d like to say that we should try and keep away from things like the Briscoe/Patterson Evening Gown match, by that I mean the weird comedy matches that are more of a skit than an actual match. I know this rule is sort of murky as there are tons of matches that skirt that line, but I guess I’m just trying to stop posts about that Trump and Rosie comedy match. Also if possible make a good and clear point as to why the match is bad. Was it the in ring performance? Was it something to do with backstage meddling? I’m pretty ignorant on the major history of wrestling in general so it’d be interesting to see points on matches that are more than just terrible in ring work. To start with  Brock Lesnar Vs. Goldberg (Wrestlemania XX) This one had problems working against it from the start. Both Goldberg and Lesnar were leaving the company after the match, something the crowd knew and already had in their minds prior to the match even starting. The guest ref was Stone Cold, really he’s the only highlight of the match aside from the crowd itself. Both men really do nothing for huge portions of time, staring each other down and simply just walking around. Then we get a long rear end lock up and we get the start of the crowd reactions. They loving can’t stand this thing. NOTHING. loving. HAPPENS. It’s honestly stunning, JR and King try their damndest to try and think up things to talk about but they have nothing. It’s lock up and lock up with the crowd booing it constantly, to the point that the announce team has to even acknowledge it. We get a nice variety of chants from the crowd until we finally get a lame finish with a jackhammer but the crowd does not give half of a gently caress about it. This is one of the weirdest matches I’ve ever watched. Two massive dudes in a match that the crowd literally could not care less about. It ends with an amazing pan over a crowd who have no reaction aside from one dude giving a thumbs down.
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Jan 25, 2016 00:31
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Here you go mate https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JLUAmC7-czI
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Jan 25, 2016 00:34
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Can't forget Sting vs Jeff Hardy at Victory Road 2011. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E5AWX8uapKo Or these "classics" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_3pjjqhgUt8
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Jan 25, 2016 00:40
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This was the match that caused Bryan to say the famous line iirc: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KwHTcBdwvVU
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Jan 25, 2016 00:43
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The only clip I can find of this match is this 9 minute segment (the match went to a 30 minute draw), but apparently it was extremely disappointing, considering the competitors. People were expecting a fast paced, high flying match, but instead got a lot of wear down holds. The only ever match between The British Bulldogs and The Rock-n-Roll Express: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rHrmG4PMGjw
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Jan 25, 2016 00:46
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5nNduF5fijI An all time classic.
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Jan 25, 2016 00:47
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werty420 posted:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5nNduF5fijI It's always great when JR just straight up calls a match poo poo.
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Jan 25, 2016 00:49
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I love all of these matches actually
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Jan 25, 2016 00:49
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Mad Man Pondo vs. Super Ninja (Abrams UWF - 1991) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MLR1-lkaJYI So bad that the entire commentary team starts making GBS threads on it
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Jan 25, 2016 00:50
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Corfl44XvnI James Storm vs. Chris Harris in a blindfold match at TNA Lockdown 2007. Blindfold matches in general are awful but unique to this match is that they can't even keep the blindfolds on their heads for any length of time. There was also an electrified cage match on that PPV where they switched the lights in the room on and off repeatedly anytime someone ran into the cage. Can't find video of it in not-poo poo quality, though.
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Jan 25, 2016 01:46
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The Stro vs Ricky Shane from NWA Mountain State Wrestling Episode 268 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CDOAiHahCHo Watch the intro and skip to 37 minutes or so if you must. Just a legendary match.
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Jan 25, 2016 01:54
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9LUMuX8MIkk The Big 'Un in Wigan.
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Jan 25, 2016 01:55
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Volcano Style posted:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9LUMuX8MIkk I was shocked when I played this on PSP-tv a few months ago and no one recognized it.
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Jan 25, 2016 02:02
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Start with Bobby Eaton, Steve Austin and Terry Taylor. Not bad, right? Now team Eaton with frighteningly talentless fat gently caress rapper P. N. News. Still capable of being worked around. Now put them in a scaffold match, thirty feet up in the air, which for some reason is a 'capture the flag' scaffold match. Now have some genius make the scaffold so narrow that they can't even pass each other safely, even if one of them wasn't a spandexed rhino. I give you Great American Bash '91's opener, and the show barely got better from there. An utter failure of design. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lkwx_O7PRBQ
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Jan 25, 2016 02:05
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Undertaker and Kane wrestled Kronic back when the Invasion was still going on. I haven't seen it in over 10 years, but it was apparantly utter dogshit to the extent that I can still remember it now. I distinctly recall two things. First, one of Kronic taking the worst whip into the outside ring post I've ever loving seen, by slowly walking toward it and headbutting the air half a metre away from the post. And two, the Undertaker breaking character halfway through and throwing a huge tantrum, including audibly swearing, because of how poo poo Kronic were. Kronic were never seen again.
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Jan 25, 2016 02:36
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The first Uncensored card is all around horrible, but I'd like to nominate the match with Dustin Rhodes and the Blacktop Bully in the back of a moving semi truck. First, the truck was constantly moving them around, so doing moves other than a punch or throwing your opponent into a bale of hay was pretty much impossible. The match didn't end with a ref calling a pinfall, but with a wrestler ringing a bell at the front of the truck. Lastly, the match was clearly pre-taped and put together from times at different parts of the day, making it look like an Ed Wood film when the match goes from a well lit road, to dusk falling, then back to a lit road in the middle of the day.
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Jan 25, 2016 03:01
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MassRafTer posted:The Stro vs Ricky Shane from NWA Mountain State Wrestling Episode 268 Weren't a bunch of goons live watching this a few years ago and insisting it was really good? Is this an uncharacteristically bad match, or was it like an ironic thing
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Jan 25, 2016 05:48
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Jenny Angel posted:Weren't a bunch of goons live watching this a few years ago and insisting it was really good? Is this an uncharacteristically bad match, or was it like an ironic thing That was my doing and I never claimed NWA MSW was anything but what it was although they had a good match or two here and there. I exist to make people watch bad things.
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Jan 25, 2016 05:58
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It's still Jenna/Sharmell
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Jan 25, 2016 06:00
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HOTLANTA MAN posted:It's still Jenna/Sharmell Jenna/Sharmell is awful, but half of Heroes of Wrestling is like a real life Requiem for a Dream
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Jan 25, 2016 06:04
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TK.Frampt posted:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Corfl44XvnI What always stands out in my memory is that I think they had another match at the next PPV which was actually REALLY loving good?
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Jan 25, 2016 06:07
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Yeah they had a "South Texas Deathmatch" a month later and it was incredible.
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Jan 25, 2016 06:08
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Psychlone posted:The first Uncensored card is all around horrible, but I'd like to nominate the match with Dustin Rhodes and the Blacktop Bully in the back of a moving semi truck. First, the truck was constantly moving them around, so doing moves other than a punch or throwing your opponent into a bale of hay was pretty much impossible. The match didn't end with a ref calling a pinfall, but with a wrestler ringing a bell at the front of the truck. Lastly, the match was clearly pre-taped and put together from times at different parts of the day, making it look like an Ed Wood film when the match goes from a well lit road, to dusk falling, then back to a lit road in the middle of the day. can i preemptively nominate the main event of uncensored '96
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Jan 25, 2016 06:11
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Global Wrestling Federation out of Dallas had a match between Chaz and Steven Dane in what they called a Bungee Cord Match. The match was held inside a shark cage suspended by a crane and both guys had a bungee cord tied around their waist. The winner was the last man in the cage. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dZiTbU5JTUk
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Jan 25, 2016 06:13
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Psychlone posted:The first Uncensored card is all around horrible, but I'd like to nominate the match with Dustin Rhodes and the Blacktop Bully in the back of a moving semi truck. First, the truck was constantly moving them around, so doing moves other than a punch or throwing your opponent into a bale of hay was pretty much impossible. The match didn't end with a ref calling a pinfall, but with a wrestler ringing a bell at the front of the truck. Lastly, the match was clearly pre-taped and put together from times at different parts of the day, making it look like an Ed Wood film when the match goes from a well lit road, to dusk falling, then back to a lit road in the middle of the day. This match at least has a notable postscript. Dustin got fired for blading, went to WWF and developed the Goldust character, so it's kinda fun to think about how different the mid-to-late 90s would've been if he stuck around WCW.
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Jan 25, 2016 06:24
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Jerusalem posted:What always stands out in my memory is that I think they had another match at the next PPV which was actually REALLY loving good? I wouldn't remember. It wouldn't surprise me, though. They weren't bad, themselves. The entire idea behind this match in particular was just doomed to be a shitshow. Extra TNA jank with the loose blindfolds added to that. I watched a little bit of Impact at the time but this was the only PPV I ever purchased. HOTLANTA MAN posted:Yeah they had a "South Texas Deathmatch" a month later and it was incredible. Hmm. Maybe worth looking into, then. yep fucked around with this message at 06:29 on Jan 25, 2016 |
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Jan 25, 2016 06:25
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werty420 posted:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5nNduF5fijI This was the first match that came to mind when I saw this thread. Had Jackie Gayda had any televised matches before this one? It's amazing how completely lost and clueless she is during this one.
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Jan 25, 2016 06:38
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Dexie posted:This was the first match that came to mind when I saw this thread. You can see poor Trish trying desparately to talk her through it, and Jackie manages to gently caress up a drop toe hold and completely fail to take the finish at all. It's hilarious.
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Jan 25, 2016 07:01
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ayn rand hand job posted:can i preemptively nominate the main event of uncensored '96 And it's even debatable as to whether that was the worst match in that show.
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Jan 25, 2016 07:04
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I remember a old clip from a random botchamania where the person being interviewed was talking about some exploding cage match that they set up that went horribly wrong and was basically lamenting how stupid of an idea it was to begin with Here's one I actually remember watching based on the reviews https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oYLe5EkP5Gc Sushi in Yiddish fucked around with this message at 07:27 on Jan 25, 2016 |
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Jan 25, 2016 07:25
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I'm gonna be the one asking a stupid question here: How can wrestling matches be bad when they are more or less scripted? Even if it's mostly improv, wouldn't the guidelines for the match say "Go through spectacular move #1, #2 and #3, have at least one throw out of the ring and two slaps with a chair, don't have too much dead time, wrestler #2 wins on his fourth submission attempt"?
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Jan 25, 2016 09:25
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evobatman posted:I'm gonna be the one asking a stupid question here: How can wrestling matches be bad when they are more or less scripted? Even if it's mostly improv, wouldn't the guidelines for the match say "Go through spectacular move #1, #2 and #3, have at least one throw out of the ring and two slaps with a chair, don't have too much dead time, wrestler #2 wins on his fourth submission attempt"? How can movies be bad if they are more or less scripted?
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Jan 25, 2016 09:48
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evobatman posted:I'm gonna be the one asking a stupid question here: How can wrestling matches be bad when they are more or less scripted? Even if it's mostly improv, wouldn't the guidelines for the match say "Go through spectacular move #1, #2 and #3, have at least one throw out of the ring and two slaps with a chair, don't have too much dead time, wrestler #2 wins on his fourth submission attempt"? Imagine going to a see a live performance of Death of a Salesman, but the actors can't remember half of their lines and the guy playing Willy Loman keeps tripping over stage props and equipment.
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Jan 25, 2016 09:54
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Jenny Angel posted:Weren't a bunch of goons live watching this a few years ago and insisting it was really good? Is this an uncharacteristically bad match, or was it like an ironic thing Goons were ironically liking NWA Mountain State for about a full year or so, and got one of their wrestlers to post on here. The sheer cardio on display in that ring. Business is about to pick up.
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Jan 25, 2016 10:25
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NWA Mountain State owns but not as hard as SSW Also the TNA match I will always remember as offending the most is a tie between the X Division cage match with way too many guys that ended in a DQ, and when prompted Vince Russo said "Show me in the rules where it says it CAN'T end in a DQ???  " and the one where they have an Empty Arena match, complete with footage of all their fans being sadly shuffled out the doors, between Kurt Angle and Sting, but before they even start the match commentary reveals that for some reason the Main Event Mafia has refused to leave the building, and are just sitting backstage waiting to interfere if things go bad (which they promptly do).
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Jan 25, 2016 10:34
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Rusty Shackelford posted:Global Wrestling Federation out of Dallas had a match between Chaz and Steven Dane in what they called a Bungee Cord Match. My god, it's everything that's poo poo about scaffold matches except without the big bump to make up for it. They somehow managed to make the scaffold match concept even worse.
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Jan 25, 2016 11:01
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Sushi in Yiddish posted:I remember a old clip from a random botchamania where the person being interviewed was talking about some exploding cage match that they set up that went horribly wrong and was basically lamenting how stupid of an idea it was to begin with That was Joey Styles talking about Bad Company vs. Public Enemy at November to Remember 1993 IIRC That show was so bad (and poorly lit) that I don't think any full matches from it were released
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Jan 25, 2016 11:47
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evobatman posted:I'm gonna be the one asking a stupid question here: How can wrestling matches be bad when they are more or less scripted? Even if it's mostly improv, wouldn't the guidelines for the match say "Go through spectacular move #1, #2 and #3, have at least one throw out of the ring and two slaps with a chair, don't have too much dead time, wrestler #2 wins on his fourth submission attempt"? The same way a film or TV show can be bad? There's any number of reasons why a match can suck. The wrestlers might just be poo poo, maybe the gimmick is a terrible idea, maybe someone is having an off night. It's not like you can just do something again if you gently caress it up because the crowd has already seen it at that point. At least you can reshoot a movie scene or whatever.
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Jan 25, 2016 12:07
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The Elimination Chamber from last year with Mark Henry's pod getting hosed up is a good example of how easy it is for a match to go off the rails. Up to that point the match had been okay, probably a bit above average or so, and then it just went downhill hard once everyone got confused and panicked.
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Jan 25, 2016 13:31
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An Actual Bear posted:The same way a film or TV show can be bad? There's any number of reasons why a match can suck. The wrestlers might just be poo poo, maybe the gimmick is a terrible idea, maybe someone is having an off night. It's not like you can just do something again if you gently caress it up because the crowd has already seen it at that point. At least you can reshoot a movie scene or whatever. Also matches don't always get enough time to have a proper build-up and payoff, a lot of bad matches are like six minutes long including entrances.
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Jan 25, 2016 13:34
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