AFL 2016 - May The Fyfe Be With You - The Something Awful Forums

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > AFL 2016 - May The Fyfe Be With You

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

The Deadly Hume posted:

It is a dark time for the League. The forces of Hawthorn led by the dark lord Luke Hodge have captured the Three-Peat, having left the rival powers of West Coast, Sydney and Fremantle struggling for answers in recent campaigns.

However, these and other clubs are determined to end this reign of terror, using use the forces of accurate kicking and clever positioning to try and van the Hawks and bring light back into the galaxy. Many believe Cow Dude is the chosen one, destined to bring balance to the game.

Some went further and paid the price; Essendon continues to be shunned for breaking the taboo of injecting their soldiers with midichlorians, to no apparent effect except really pissing off the international doping agency. With the architect of this program, The Hird banished to the rim worlds, the Bombers have sought the help of a ragtag bunch of mercenaries to help them through this time.

Awesome OP! The only minor change/addition I'd make for the Saints is to add Billings to the list of players to watch out for. If needed you could replace McKenzie with him cause Billings is much more of a sure thing to play lots of games.

# ¿ Jan 31, 2016 07:05

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# ¿ Apr 18, 2024 23:56

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

realbez posted:

Here's to another dominant year!

BOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

# ¿ Jan 31, 2016 07:16

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

thepokey posted:

Also, apparently Boomer almost killed himself with a chainsaw or something if we are talking about strange off season antics

https://twitter.com/NMFCOfficial/status/693599085010399232/photo/1

Hooooooly poo poo.

# ¿ Feb 1, 2016 00:32

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

I didn't think it was possible to come up with a wrong reason to hate the Bombers but that person has managed to do it.

# ¿ Feb 1, 2016 07:35

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

The Demons have the only morally correct name. Hail Satan!

# ¿ Feb 1, 2016 08:19

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

Essendon should rent out their name to sponsors like stadiums do. In this day and age it's totally socially acceptable and it will help them generate the cash needed to pay for all the lawsuits they will have to pay out.

The Essendon "Fresh food people" has a nice ring to it.

# ¿ Feb 2, 2016 03:36

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

JOM will nominate the Saints and then 5 minutes after the trade is finalised his knee will explode as he films a snap chat video. Fragments of bone from the explosion will kill a midget and a schoolgirl.

# ¿ Feb 2, 2016 13:29

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

AFL HQ can't stop being horrible even when it's got nothing to do with AFL.

http://www.adelaidenow.com.au/news/...289dafebe37d11e posted:

AFL chief executive Gillon McLachlan has launched court action over the approval of a massive wind farm on the doorstep of his family�s historic Rosebank property, near Mt Pleasant.

Mr McLachlan has appealed against the approval of the $700 million wind farm, to feature 114 turbines standing up to 165m high dotted along the ranges between Palmer, Tungkillo and Sanderston.

The appeal is listed against wind farm developers Trustpower, the Mid Murray Council, Environment Protection Agency, the Planning Department and the Environment Minister.

A preliminary conference is scheduled to be heard in the Environment, Resources and Development Court by Commissioner Lolita Mohyla at 3.30pm tomorrow.

Mr McLachlan�s is one of four appeals filed against the wind farm, which was approved by the Mid Murray Council�s development assessment panel on December 18. He yesterday declined to comment about the appeal.

In December, he submitted a video message to the development assessment panel opposing the wind farm being built.

�Even if it were to be conclusively established wind farms do not produce health problems, it�s annoying and affects quality of life,� he said.

�I was frankly heartbroken that this land will be forever marred by enormous man-made structures.�

Mr McLachlan also said any wind farm would cause significant damage to the land, would hinder potential tourism opportunities and �cause extreme division in the community�.

Rosebank, a prominent and historic sheep station east of Mt Pleasant, was pioneered in 1843 by Scottish-born landowner George Melrose, whose descendants include the McLachlan family.

The Eastern Mount Lofty Ranges Landscape Guardians, on behalf of up to 90 residents in the region, have also appealed against the development. They are scheduled for a preliminary conference in the ERD Court in mid-February.

During an ERD Court preliminary conference, the parties discuss how they would like the court proceedings to occur. This could include through continued negotiations, mediation or by trial or hearing.

Eastern Mount Lofty Ranges Landscape Guardians chair Tony Walker said opponents felt the approval process was unjust. �We believe that the whole process failed to give any weight to the objectors,� he said. �There is a lot of opposition � from the little man on the ground and from people with more resources.�

Numerous people living near wind farms have claimed they cause health problems, including severe headaches and disrupted sleep patterns.

However, the National Health and Medical Research Council issued a report last year that found there was �currently no consistent evidence that wind farms cause adverse health effects in humans� � but said there was a need for more in-depth research.

Mr Walker said those opposed to the development were prepared for a fight. �We�ve been fighting for almost five years (and) it�s a fight that could go on for years, depending on who blinks first,� he said. �(But) it�s worth fighting for.�

# ¿ Feb 3, 2016 02:04

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

Well this escalated quickly.

http://www.afl.com.au/news/2016-02-03/victorian-clubs-handed-afl-funding-for-academies posted:

VICTORIAN clubs have been given seed funding to establish club-branded academies in allocated areas throughout Victoria and the Northern Territory in a radical plan to attract youngsters from non-traditional football backgrounds to the game.

Under the plan unveiled to clubs on Tuesday, they will be given the chance to invest in specific regions to attract youngsters from diverse backgrounds and indigenous heritage to play AFL and develop elite talent within those areas.

The plan is part of an AFL push to ensure the game continues to attract and foster the development of players regardless of their background or location.

For example, reigning premiers Hawthorn have been allocated the eastern Whitehorse region in Melbourne, along with Gippsland local government areas and Katherine in the Northern Territory, while North Melbourne has been given the Wyndham and western Melbourne areas.

Those clubs will set up 'Next Generation' AFL Academies for boys and girls aged 11-18 using club brands with the aiming of increasing the talent pool.

Clubs will identify and attract talented youngsters into regional squads to prepare them for the talent pathway program that players start at 16.

Each club's investment in the academies will sit outside the football department cap.

Football operations boss Mark Evans said the AFL was determined to make sure people who might not have been raised with a traditional football background feel welcome to play the game and are attracted to the AFL.

"We will use the expertise, resources and brand power of clubs out in regional communities to help find and attract and develop young talent, boys and girls, all cultures, all backgrounds," Evans said.

"If clubs can help attract and develop some talent that would be under-represented and not normally find its way into the AFL pathway then they will have the ability to receive some incentive for that similar to the bidding system used for the northern academies."

If a club develops a young Australian from an Asian or African background and wants to draft them, then they will receive a discount on a basis similar to the current bidding system. Clubs will be able to apply for draft discounts on other youngsters from non-English speaking backgrounds if they develop the player in a similar manner.

For indigenous players from under-represented areas such as the Pilbara, incentives will also exist for clubs to develop and nurture talent in those areas.

The AFL believes the draft bidding system will stop clubs from trying to exploit the system by enticing talent to move into their areas.

Evans said clubs intending to have team in the new national women's competition should ensure girls are part of the academy programs.

The clubs were consulted in the past 12 months and are understood to have accepted the allocation in general terms.

"The allocation of regions has been based on a range of factors � aligning to existing under-18 talent regions, minimising player travel and access issues, aligning AFL clubs to current or historical relationships with certain communities and balanced access to 5-18 year-olds from diverse backgrounds," Evans said.

The AFL will meet with South Australian and West Australian clubs regarding the allocating of regions in those states, and is in the process of finalising the allocation of regions in Tasmania.

Next generation AFL club academies � Victorian clubs region allocation

Western Bulldogs � Western Melbourne, Wimmera, Mallee, South West Victoria, Ballarat, (North Ballarat Rebels & Western Jets)

Essendon � North West Melbourne (Calder Cannons), West Arnhem (NT)

Melbourne � South East Melbourne (Dandenong Stingrays), Alice Springs (NT)

Collingwood � Central Melbourne (Oakleigh Chargers), Barkly (NT)

St Kilda � Inner Southern Melbourne (Sandringham Dragons), Frankston LGA

North Melbourne � Melbourne and Wyndham LGAs (Calder Cannons & Western Jets)

Hawthorn � Eastern/Whitehorse LGAs (Eastern Ranges), Gippsland (Gippsland Power), Katherine (NT)

Carlton � Northern Melbourne (Northern Knights)

Geelong � Geelong /Hampden (Geelong Falcons), East Arnhem (NT)

Richmond � Goulburn Murray, Bendigo, Sunraysia, North Central (Bendigo Pioneers and Murray Bushrangers)

E: I'd be really interested to see the demographic breakdowns of all those areas. Also, there's a NT map in the link.

# ¿ Feb 3, 2016 08:11

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

The Pies long history of racism gets them a NT zone.

Overall, I really don't know if this is a good or bad thing. I can see the reasons for it but I'm highly skeptical about the fairness of its application. Someone really needs to figure out the exact demographic breakdowns for all the areas, highlighting indigenous and other relevant populations. Since the expenses for it are outside the football department cap then this will clearly benefit the richer clubs more.

# ¿ Feb 3, 2016 08:23

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

NTRabbit posted:

I sure am glad that Adelaide, Port Adelaide, and South Australia's long history of being the only state interested in doing anything for the NT has been rewarded.

Equalisation at work!

# ¿ Feb 3, 2016 08:48

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

spamman posted:

Any reason teams like St. Kilda didn't get a region of NT?

The Saints have been really light on for indigenous talent in recent years. Off the top of my head only Gresham is indigenous and I think before that Milera was the only other for quite a while.

I would hope that the AFL figured out the areas so that each team has equal access to the target demographics. I'm not holding my breath though.

With what we've seen so far the Saints region looks like it will have a lot of really white/traditional footy areas. The size of our possible talent pool could be heavily determined by how far east the boundary goes and how much of Dandenong and the surrounding suburbs the Dees get (springvale/noble park etc).

# ¿ Feb 3, 2016 09:58

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

Solemn Sloth posted:

If someone can find a definitive resource of the actual boundaries I can do that with an age/sex/ethnicity breakdown(although it would be a bit outdated from the last census, would be even better when we get the data for the 2016 census) , when I get back to uni and have the GIS lab.

It's probably pointless but I might shoot an email off to the Saints asking about this to see what response I get. Is it worth mentioning the fact that the census data is relatively old now? I'm not getting my hopes up for getting the data we need but I've heard some good things about people sending the club emails expressing concerns and getting solid responses so I might just get lucky. I might even call them out on their bullshit target for Moorabbin being ready in time for the 2017 season when the plans haven't even been approved by council yet (as far as I can tell).

I'd email the AFL but good luck finding an email address to send it to and I've got more chance of winning the lottery than getting a response.

# ¿ Feb 3, 2016 11:45

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

From that article on the new academy system:

"The AFL believes the draft bidding system will stop clubs from trying to exploit the system by enticing talent to move into their areas."

If the AFL really believes that then this whole thing will be horribly hosed up and only serve to make the rich clubs richer and more successful. How the gently caress would the the new bidding system stop clubs paying kids to move into their zone? They still get the first pick of the players they want at a discounted price. Why the gently caress wouldn't they do it if they have the money as I'm sure they can figure a way around any weak rear end rules the AFL implements to try and stop it from happening.

# ¿ Feb 3, 2016 13:17

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

https://twitter.com/TitusOReily/status/695166113437495296

# ¿ Feb 4, 2016 11:03

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

TG-Chrono posted:

There are numerous trains (V-Line) that run especially for the footy. They terminate at one of the two stadia in the city that hosts AFL games.

Isn't the Vline all hosed up for an extended period?

# ¿ Feb 5, 2016 03:59

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

snaeksikn posted:

the afl has knocked back the proposal for other clubs to get top up players in lieu of banned essendon players. absolute bullshit

As a Saints fan I don't really care, but I can see how that really could screw over port. I hope the clubs manage to get the Dons to pay the players salary for the year. Or at least a significant portion of it.

# ¿ Feb 5, 2016 08:09

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

gay picnic defence posted:

Essendon has already agreed/been dragged kicking and screaming to pay for Carlisle's salary this year.

Really? I thought that hadn't been settled yet. In that case, Carlisle's supposedly big contract must be pretty small (in terms of what the Saints will pay) by now as he'd already lost some after the snapchat fiasco. Alan Richarson's comments about activating the 5th year in the contract make more sense if we don't have to pay for the first.

# ¿ Feb 5, 2016 12:14

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

What's Ultimate Footy and should I play it? Does it take up a bunch of time and can I make a stupid gimmick team made up of the players with funny names?

# ¿ Feb 5, 2016 12:17

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

NTRabbit posted:

It's a fantasy football draft league, so no two of us can have the same player. That means yes you can make a gimmick team, pretend you're living The League in real life, and you absolutely should sign up.

Sold!

Wylie Buzza is going to be the greatest captain to never play a game!

# ¿ Feb 5, 2016 12:49

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

TG-Chrono posted:

I'm up at 6 to start smoking the pork belly I've got. 1030am kickoff, half time luncheon.

I would watch NFL if I could eat BBQ at the same time.

# ¿ Feb 7, 2016 14:15

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

MUSCULAR BEAVER posted:

This is the first *ad break* year that I've watched the super *ad break* bowl *ad break* live

# ¿ Feb 8, 2016 01:25

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

Touchdown celebrations are the stupidest thing ever.

# ¿ Feb 8, 2016 01:32

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

Get ready to get hosed WA football, Freo and West Coast!

http://www.afl.com.au/news/2016-02-08/wa-footy-misses-out-contract-to-run-new-perth-stadium posted:

WEST Australian football faces an uncertain financial future after Perth Stadium Management missed out on the contract to operate the state's new home of football.

The WA government on Monday announced that Stadium Australian Operations, the operators of ANZ Stadium in Sydney, was preferred to Domain Stadium operators Perth Stadium Management, the stadium operating arm of the Western Australian Football Commission.

The WAFC yields roughly $15 million net revenue from its current ownership of Domain Stadium that is directly invested back into football development in WA.

WAFC Chairman Murray McHenry said the decision was a major blow.

"We are deeply disappointed about this decision and believe that football and its major international partners have the experience, skills and imagination to operate Perth Stadium on behalf of all West Australians," McHenry said.

"We are now deeply concerned about the future financial model for WA football because stadium operations have been critical to the development and success of the game.

"At all times during the development of Perth Stadium the state government has reassured football that the sport will be no worse off as a result of the new venue. We now need the government to show how this will be the case in order to safeguard the future of our game.

"We need the state government to progress discussions on how to preserve football's financial future as the sport now has no certainty for its future.

"We will immediately start re-assessing how to sustain the ongoing growth and development of football and its various operations like Auskick, community football, WAFL, female football, indigenous and multicultural programs.

"This decision also presents us with a range of concerns about the potential user agreements for our two AFL clubs at Perth Stadium and whether they will generate sufficient returns to sustain football in Western Australia."

WA Premier Colin Barnett made the announcement at Burswood and said that Stadium Australia Operations was the best choice of the four shortlisted operators based on value for money, operating approach and experience.

"It was an exacting process of selection but Stadium Australia were significantly the best proposal," Mr Barnett said.

"There is still probably two to three months of work to finalise the contract but we expect that to go through in a smooth way."

The Premier also said that WA football would continue to be funded via a revenue stream generated from the stadium despite football not operating the venue.

"Out of this contract, to be finalised, there will be a profit sharing arrangement and a revenue flow for the state government," he said.

"Out of that we will be able to maintain funding for the WA football commission and local football. Obviously still some work to be done but a big step forward for the stadium."

WA's sport and recreation minister Mia Davies was confident WA's AFL clubs, Fremantle and West Coast, would have no issues negotiating user agreements with Stadium Australia Operations.

"We are very confident they will be able to continue to negotiate along with the state," Ms Davies said.

"Obviously football and cricket as two of those key user groups will need to be taken into account and they will have to work very closely with them but we are confident that they will be able to do that.

"We are very confident that this stadium presents a wonderful opportunity for football to grow and thrive in WA. We are not about making it harder for football.

"I can't see any future in WA where football doesn't see this as a great outcome."

AEG Ogden and Nationwide Venue Management were the other two shortlisted operators.

AEG Ogden has been announced as the reserve respondent should negotiations between the WA government and Stadium Australians Operations fail.

AFL football is set to move from Domain Stadium to the new Perth Stadium at the start of 2018 premiership season although construction is currently ahead of schedule and it is possible that the stadium could be ready to host finals in 2017.

The WAFC administration is also currently housed at Domain Stadium along with the West Coast Eagles.

The Eagles are planning to move to a new purpose-built administration and training base at Lathlain Park with construction of that facility is currently in the planning phase.

There had been major concerns within the WAFC for the future financial model of WA football if Perth Stadium Management did not win the operating rights to the new stadium.

The WAFC now faces that reality whilst going through the process of appointing a new chief executive after Gary Walton resigned at the end of January following four years in the role.

If I was Freo and WC I wouldn't sign any long term contracts and I'd make sure subi is available as a fallback option. Does this poo poo ever not end up worse off for the clubs?

# ¿ Feb 8, 2016 13:12

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

Apart from blatant corruption and profiteering is there any reason why they didn't just gradually upgrade Subi instead of spending 1b+ on building a totally new stadium?

Edit: LOL as if there is anything but corruption and profit driving government decisions.

# ¿ Feb 9, 2016 02:19

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

In further injury news: Paul Ahern from GWS did his ACL the other day.

# ¿ Feb 9, 2016 08:55

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

AFL.com.au is reporting that it's looking likely that all of the banned players will lodge an appeal.

# ¿ Feb 10, 2016 09:04

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

I'd listen to it but I'm not sure I'd be any good talking about it.

I'd love to hear a podcast that is Gough/Solemn Sloth watching a Dees game live.

E: ^^ :dance:

# ¿ Feb 10, 2016 10:11

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

hiddenmovement posted:

Looking at the Big Bash Ladies ratings, I'm beginning to think a womans comp might almost be able to pay for itself.

Almost.

How long until someone like BT or Derm suggests that we give them extra small uniforms in order to draw bigger ratings and make it more profitable?

# ¿ Feb 11, 2016 10:43

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

TG-Chrono posted:

Don't look at Essendon's new clash guernsey. Just don't.

BETTER RED THAN DEAD

# ¿ Feb 11, 2016 12:11

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

Went to the Saints intraclub today. The football wasn't amazing but the weather was and there was a pretty big crowd. It was a good day.

# ¿ Feb 12, 2016 09:50

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

# ¿ Feb 13, 2016 03:53

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

If they just banned all spectators from the ground then they wouldn't have any security issues.

# ¿ Feb 15, 2016 02:26

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

Would it surprise anyone if it was revealed that the Dons were using banned drugs to get these players back on the park for the year? They wouldn't even need to document it cause they could just say they were doing it in their own time without the club knowing. Then wads of cash from mysterious benefactors could turn up at those players houses to help with court costs and other misc expenses.

# ¿ Feb 16, 2016 13:53

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

Here's one last derail before the footy starts:

Does anyone have any recommendations for a good smart TV on a budget of around $1500? It will mainly be used for movies, TV and footy so I don't care about input lag for games and am mainly after one with good picture quality. The only good review sites I can find are all US and for some reason the TV's we get here seem to be pretty different to the "same" models in the US (unless I'm stupid and don't know what I'm doing) so it's making it hard for me to pin down a quality option.

# ¿ Feb 17, 2016 12:27

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

Thanks for the TV help! It pretty much confirmed what I was thinking.

I went to JB today to look at the 55" Samsung 6200 or 6400 which were my first choices and right in my price range. While looking at those I noticed that they had a 55" LG OLED on sale for $2500 (originally being $3000) so I asked the guy a few questions about them without really intending to buy one. He mentioned that they were all sold out and I asked about buying the display model. He cut the price to $2350 and I couldn't say no. It's more than I was wanting to spend but it's loving spectacular.

CANT WAIT TO WATCH THE FOOTY ON IT!

# ¿ Feb 18, 2016 06:29

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

gabensraum posted:

^ edit well this is wasted, just disregard the below. p.s. blues for the flag.

Just want to add to the yeah gently caress smart tvs cacophony. Buy the best TV based on more important criteria and set up some kind of HTPC, chromecast at the cheapest but something more featured to run kodi or plex is your premiership option.

The smart TV stuff wasn't a super important criteria for me it was more about the picture quality. It's a novelty that might be useful at some stage.

As for the HTPC stuff I have no idea about any of that. I did try to set one up a few years ago for a friend that has a MASSIVE dvd collection (800+ movies and probably another 800 discs of TV shows) but I quickly gave up when I figured that it would take me pretty much a full year of full time ripping to get all the DVDs done.

# ¿ Feb 18, 2016 06:46

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

Hodge will attempt to murder someone on the field (my prediction is he'll push them into the fence at full speed) and all the commentators will do is praise him for being a champion of the game.

# ¿ Feb 18, 2016 07:49

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

Had a beer with dinner and now I'm struggling to stay awake while watching this.

# ¿ Feb 18, 2016 10:07

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# ¿ Apr 18, 2024 23:56

Periphery: Jul 27, 2003; ...

I want

Lachie Weller :swoon:

to come to the Saints so bad.

# ¿ Feb 19, 2016 09:37

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