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Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud
Apr 7, 2003

I’d make eye contact with him and fart. I did it all the time for like two years. I didn’t even know his full name, just heard that his coworkers thought he was a nut for complaining about “the guy who would fart on me in the break room”
Here it is. I've had enough. I'm loving sick of beards.

Beards are so 2006. To prove this, I'm going to grow one, for the first time ever.

Here I am:



I am going to grow a beard, to prove that beards are poo poo for assholes.

I'm going to observe the following rules:

If someone says "Your beard looks nice," I'm going to withdraw from the contest (this is a contest) immediately. They must say precisely that. "Your beard looks nice."
If someone who is not my wife, god bless her, has sex with me because I have a beard, I will immediately withdraw from this contest that has no real objective and haven't really been declared.

None of this makes any sense, and you can also participate, but who loving cares. gently caress you.

I hate you. I hate your beard.

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Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud
Apr 7, 2003

I’d make eye contact with him and fart. I did it all the time for like two years. I didn’t even know his full name, just heard that his coworkers thought he was a nut for complaining about “the guy who would fart on me in the break room”
Mods please sticky

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud
Apr 7, 2003

I’d make eye contact with him and fart. I did it all the time for like two years. I didn’t even know his full name, just heard that his coworkers thought he was a nut for complaining about “the guy who would fart on me in the break room”
If you're participating, please post beard progress pictures. If you already have a beard, you will be banned.

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud
Apr 7, 2003

I’d make eye contact with him and fart. I did it all the time for like two years. I didn’t even know his full name, just heard that his coworkers thought he was a nut for complaining about “the guy who would fart on me in the break room”
Beard progres report:



I hope I have more to report next week. lol. WIll update.

Larry Parrish
Jul 9, 2012

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
OP is clearly only making this thread because his doctor is allowing him to take T supplements again. Please gas.

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud
Apr 7, 2003

I’d make eye contact with him and fart. I did it all the time for like two years. I didn’t even know his full name, just heard that his coworkers thought he was a nut for complaining about “the guy who would fart on me in the break room”

Larry Parrish posted:

OP is clearly only making this thread because his doctor is allowing him to take T supplements again. Please gas.

Your beard is poo poo.

Larry Parrish
Jul 9, 2012

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Citizen Tayne posted:

Your beard is poo poo.

I will have you know, some man with a t-shirt saying ASK ME ABOUT MY BADASS BEARD told me I had a badass beard, and that I should go to Badass Beards to have it waxed with smells like 'Secret Agent' (orange and sandalwood)

angry_keebler
Jul 16, 2006

In His presence the mountains quake and the hills melt away; the earth trembles and its people are destroyed. Who can stand before His fierce anger?
how tall is your wife

if she is short she will not like your beard

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud
Apr 7, 2003

I’d make eye contact with him and fart. I did it all the time for like two years. I didn’t even know his full name, just heard that his coworkers thought he was a nut for complaining about “the guy who would fart on me in the break room”

Larry Parrish posted:

I will have you know, some man with a t-shirt saying ASK ME ABOUT MY BADASS BEARD told me I had a badass beard, and that I should go to Badass Beards to have it waxed with smells like 'Secret Agent' (orange and sandalwood)

Larry, you're my bro and I love you, but.. It's time to show us you're beard.

fart simpson
Jul 2, 2005

DEATH TO AMERICA
:xickos:

i spent 4 months growing out a beard a couple years ago and an old retired pilot came up to me and said "son, you should shave. that beard doesn't work on you" and he was right

big scary monsters
Sep 2, 2011

-~Skullwave~-
nice beardo honeypot thread

maniacdevnull
Apr 18, 2007

FOUR CUBIC FRAMES
DISPROVES SOFT G GOD
YOU ARE EDUCATED STUPID

Nice glasses Egon

maniacdevnull
Apr 18, 2007

FOUR CUBIC FRAMES
DISPROVES SOFT G GOD
YOU ARE EDUCATED STUPID

Ban op, p&ty

Elder Postsman
Aug 30, 2000


i used hot bot to search for "teens"

I've been on vacation all week so I haven't shaved. am I allowed to participate or do I need to start over.

Silver Alicorn
Mar 30, 2008

𝓪 𝓻𝓮𝓭 𝓹𝓪𝓷𝓭𝓪 𝓲𝓼 𝓪 𝓬𝓾𝓻𝓲𝓸𝓾𝓼 𝓼𝓸𝓻𝓽 𝓸𝓯 𝓬𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓮
bless you tori

minivanmegafun
Jul 27, 2004

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G8ffkDf0ol4

e: zen desk robot plz make this video autoplay when this thread is loaded tia

akadajet
Sep 14, 2003

minivanmegafun posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G8ffkDf0ol4

e: zen desk robot plz make this video autoplay when this thread is loaded tia

(Exclusive)

Video Nasty
Jun 17, 2003

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tsgWUimfupQ

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud
Apr 7, 2003

I’d make eye contact with him and fart. I did it all the time for like two years. I didn’t even know his full name, just heard that his coworkers thought he was a nut for complaining about “the guy who would fart on me in the break room”

Elder Postsman posted:

I've been on vacation all week so I haven't shaved. am I allowed to participate or do I need to start over.

You're in, as long as it's new. Previous beardhavers need not apply.

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud
Apr 7, 2003

I’d make eye contact with him and fart. I did it all the time for like two years. I didn’t even know his full name, just heard that his coworkers thought he was a nut for complaining about “the guy who would fart on me in the break room”
Today's beard status: Not much going on.

angry_keebler
Jul 16, 2006

In His presence the mountains quake and the hills melt away; the earth trembles and its people are destroyed. Who can stand before His fierce anger?

angry_keebler posted:

how tall is your wife

if she is short she will not like your beard

tori please answer the question it is for a project

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud
Apr 7, 2003

I’d make eye contact with him and fart. I did it all the time for like two years. I didn’t even know his full name, just heard that his coworkers thought he was a nut for complaining about “the guy who would fart on me in the break room”

angry_keebler posted:

how tall is your wife

if she is short she will not like your beard

She's 5'4".

angry_keebler
Jul 16, 2006

In His presence the mountains quake and the hills melt away; the earth trembles and its people are destroyed. Who can stand before His fierce anger?
thank you for helping with the project

angry_keebler
Jul 16, 2006

In His presence the mountains quake and the hills melt away; the earth trembles and its people are destroyed. Who can stand before His fierce anger?

ah, so your beard is already 64 inches???




haha, kablammo!

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud
Apr 7, 2003

I’d make eye contact with him and fart. I did it all the time for like two years. I didn’t even know his full name, just heard that his coworkers thought he was a nut for complaining about “the guy who would fart on me in the break room”

angry_keebler posted:

ah, so your beard is already 64 inches???




haha, kablammo!

You fucker

Space-Pope
Aug 13, 2003

by zen death robot
if i dont shave then my face feels itchy and i dont look quite as good as i usually do

Larry Parrish
Jul 9, 2012

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Hello. I already have a beard. I'm not gonna fall for that trap.

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud
Apr 7, 2003

I’d make eye contact with him and fart. I did it all the time for like two years. I didn’t even know his full name, just heard that his coworkers thought he was a nut for complaining about “the guy who would fart on me in the break room”

Larry Parrish posted:

I already have a beard.

lmao

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

Silver Alicorn posted:

bless you tori

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud
Apr 7, 2003

I’d make eye contact with him and fart. I did it all the time for like two years. I didn’t even know his full name, just heard that his coworkers thought he was a nut for complaining about “the guy who would fart on me in the break room”
Sunday afternoon status: Beard very slightly longer than before.

Silver Alicorn
Mar 30, 2008

𝓪 𝓻𝓮𝓭 𝓹𝓪𝓷𝓭𝓪 𝓲𝓼 𝓪 𝓬𝓾𝓻𝓲𝓸𝓾𝓼 𝓼𝓸𝓻𝓽 𝓸𝓯 𝓬𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓮
your beard is growing roughly 20 microns per hour

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud
Apr 7, 2003

I’d make eye contact with him and fart. I did it all the time for like two years. I didn’t even know his full name, just heard that his coworkers thought he was a nut for complaining about “the guy who would fart on me in the break room”

Silver Alicorn posted:

your beard is growing roughly 20 microns per hour

I dunno about that, the picture in the OP was taken after not shaving since Wednesday.

Silver Alicorn
Mar 30, 2008

𝓪 𝓻𝓮𝓭 𝓹𝓪𝓷𝓭𝓪 𝓲𝓼 𝓪 𝓬𝓾𝓻𝓲𝓸𝓾𝓼 𝓼𝓸𝓻𝓽 𝓸𝓯 𝓬𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓮
it may vary depending on metabolism etc

Space-Pope
Aug 13, 2003

by zen death robot
i have both the metabolism and resting heart rate of a tortoise. how fast will mine grow?

The Management
Jan 2, 2010

sup, bitch?
hey op,

Your beard looks nice.

The Management
Jan 2, 2010

sup, bitch?
contest over, close thread

also,

angry_keebler posted:

ah, so your beard is already 64 inches???




haha, kablammo!

Jonny 290
May 5, 2005



[ASK] me about OS/2 Warp
using the #6 guard i took about 2 inches off the ole face-snuggie this week. time for my summer cut

exe cummings
Jan 22, 2005

best of luck on your chin warmer

NoneMoreNegative
Jul 20, 2000
GOTH FASCISTIC
PAIN
MASTER




shit wizard dad

yard salad posted:

best of luck on your chin warmer



http://www.dx.com/p/vogue-wig-beard-hobo-hat-sloppy-caveman-handmade-knitted-hat-black-423950#.VsErFvmLS0o

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Korean Boomhauer
Sep 4, 2008
i had a real cool beard that i got compliments on but i looked too much like i belong to a metal band and i kinda need work so welp

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