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OJ MIST 2 THE DICK
Sep 11, 2008

Anytime I need to see your face I just close my eyes
And I am taken to a place
Where your crystal minds and magenta feelings
Take up shelter in the base of my spine
Sweet like a chica cherry cola

-Cheap Trick

Nap Ghost





Welcome to Bellator 194 on Spike.

Ken Shamrock and Royce Gracie look to add a match to the trilogy.

Kimbo Slice is looking to get paid victory against his "former" friend DADA 5000


ignore the fact that 3 or 4 men have bet hundreds of thousands on DADA in Vegas today and have forced the book closed on this match because of fuckery.

Should you care about any other match on the show? Does the combined age of 100+ for the fighters in the Main Event not satisfy you enough!?


PRELIMS AT 6 P.M. EASTERN ON SPIKE.COM (http://bellator.spike.com/live)

Manny Lozoya (142) vs. Jacob Norsworthy (141.8)

Jason Langellier (158.4) vs. Anthony Ivy (154)

Mike Trinh (128.8) vs. Angel Zamora (129.4)

Isaac Villanueva (185.8) vs. Richard Knepp (184.8)

Adrian Yanez (134.6) vs. Ryan Hollis (134.8)

Ruben Esparza (184.2) vs. CJ Hancock (185.6)

Davis Sylvester (144.2) vs. Jeremy Mahon (144.4)

Justin Wren (247) vs. Juan Torres (259.8)


MAIN CARD - LIVE ON SPIKE AT 9 P.M. EASTERN

Emmanuel Sanchez (149.2) vs. Daniel Pineda (148.2)

Emanuel Newton (205) vs. Linton Vassell (205.4)

Melvin Guillard (156) vs. Derek Camps (155)

Kimbo Slice (232) vs. Dada 5000 (265)






Ken Shamrock (201.2) vs. Royce Gracie (190.8)

OJ MIST 2 THE DICK fucked around with this message at 06:14 on Feb 20, 2016

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Charles Gnarwin
Jul 31, 2014

I joined the #RXT REVOLUTION.
:boom:
he knows...


I put a reminder in my phone to make sure I didn't forget about this. I am so ready for the freakshow fights.

ch3cooh
Jun 26, 2006

dammit I'm geoblocked from the prelim stream

Le Saboteur
Dec 5, 2007

I hear you wish to ball, adventurer..
Bellator is reaching new heights tonight. It finally got its own event thread.

Luigi Thirty
Apr 30, 2006

Emergency confection port.

My body is ready

Schenck v. U.S.
Sep 8, 2010
play by play time

one of my favorite things about B league is fighters having no top control so they lose position a lot
like this army guy gave up top position throwing a wild elbow but the other guy didn't know what he was doing either so a sweep happened immediately

Triticum Guzzler
Jun 16, 2002

ch3cooh posted:

dammit I'm geoblocked from the prelim stream

http://spikelive-f.akamaihd.net/i/spikebellator_live1@62376/master.m3u8

for whatever reason this always works on my phone. also you missed the best tko ever

Triticum Guzzler
Jun 16, 2002
like you know the little baby shots guys do on the ground to stay busy? well a guy just did a hundred of those to the body and the guy on the bottom just sat there and did nothing so the ref stopped it out of embarrassment

Team_q
Jul 30, 2007

What a weird fight, let's get a couple of military veterans from the Z leagues, one of whom hasn't fought pro in 6 years, and have them halfheartedly punch each other.

Team_q
Jul 30, 2007

Whelp, the next one over in seconds, where a dude with a rough hair cut beat up a medic.

LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"
Nice brain stem hammer fist to end it

Triticum Guzzler
Jun 16, 2002
this is classic scott coker $1000 dollar local undercard stuff

fatherdog
Feb 16, 2005
Did I miss the Justin Wren fight?

willie_dee
Jun 21, 2010
I obtain sexual gratification from observing people being inflicted with violent head injuries
Are the prelims over long before this card is going to start on TV?

Gramps
Dec 30, 2006


willie_dee posted:

Are the prelims over long before this card is going to start on TV?

looks like the card starts at 9:00 est so another half hour or so

Writer Cath
Apr 1, 2007

Box. Flipped.
Plaster Town Cop
Okay, so I'm going to watch my first MMA show. This Bellator card is a shining example of the sport, right?

Lord Waffle Beard
Dec 7, 2013

Writer Cath posted:

Okay, so I'm going to watch my first MMA show. This Bellator card is a shining example of the sport, right?

Well, there is no way shamrock gracie III can be worse than shamrock gracie II

willie_dee
Jun 21, 2010
I obtain sexual gratification from observing people being inflicted with violent head injuries

Writer Cath posted:

Okay, so I'm going to watch my first MMA show. This Bellator card is a shining example of the sport, right?

JT isn't on the card so no, this won't be worth watching

Chris James 2
Aug 9, 2012


Writer Cath posted:

Okay, so I'm going to watch my first MMA show. This Bellator card is a shining example of the sport, right?

Every few months something ridiculously funny comes along that makes people who follow MMA glad they do.

I don't know if this will be the funniest thing this week, there's been a couple contenders, but this will at least be the perfect conclusion to the funniest week of the month. I just hope the fiasco that is Ken/Royce lives up to the fiasco that is Kimbo/Dada (it likely won't)

OJ MIST 2 THE DICK
Sep 11, 2008

Anytime I need to see your face I just close my eyes
And I am taken to a place
Where your crystal minds and magenta feelings
Take up shelter in the base of my spine
Sweet like a chica cherry cola

-Cheap Trick

Nap Ghost

Writer Cath posted:

Okay, so I'm going to watch my first MMA show. This Bellator card is a shining example of the sport, right?

if UFC is WWE, Bellator is like the TNA

Gramps
Dec 30, 2006


Writer Cath posted:

Okay, so I'm going to watch my first MMA show. This Bellator card is a shining example of the sport, right?

It will likely be a shining example as to why I am a fan of the sport, but don't take that to mean any of the fights will be good. The 2 main fights are ludicrous, which much of the time is more enjoyable than a really great competitive, technical fight.

Marching Powder
Mar 8, 2008



stop the fucking fight, cornerman, your dude is fucking done and is about to be killed.

Writer Cath posted:

Okay, so I'm going to watch my first MMA show. This Bellator card is a shining example of the sport, right?

lol. welcome.

Gay Horney
Feb 10, 2013

by Reene
Shamrock/Ortiz 2 was my first main UFC event and I'm really excited to see him again. I feel like he's only gotten meaner with age.

LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

fatherdog posted:

Did I miss the Justin Wren fight?

Yeah, apparently it was early on.

Reads like his opponent was having too much fun. Dude stretched during one round, asked Big John for a picture in between rounds at one point

Marching Powder
Mar 8, 2008



stop the fucking fight, cornerman, your dude is fucking done and is about to be killed.
i like ken shamrock's pre-pubescent voice coming out of a roided old man's face

DumbWhiteGuy
Jul 4, 2007

You need haters. Fellas if you got 20 haters, you need 40 of them motherfuckers. If there's any haters in here that don't have nobody to hate on, feel free to hate on me

Sharzak posted:

Shamrock/Ortiz 2 was my first main UFC event and I'm really excited to see him again. I feel like he's only gotten meaner with age.

nah it's just the steroids

OJ MIST 2 THE DICK
Sep 11, 2008

Anytime I need to see your face I just close my eyes
And I am taken to a place
Where your crystal minds and magenta feelings
Take up shelter in the base of my spine
Sweet like a chica cherry cola

-Cheap Trick

Nap Ghost
Tyson on commentary!?

Yessssssss

Shayna Baszler
Oct 24, 2001

i'll always take care of you
Muldoon
Ken Shamrock will suffer debilitating internal bleeding

Marching Powder
Mar 8, 2008



stop the fucking fight, cornerman, your dude is fucking done and is about to be killed.

DumbWhiteGuy posted:

nah it's just the steroids



looks like they stuffed a hugh jackman promo pic through the 'in 20 years' machine and it was extremely unkind to him

Writer Cath
Apr 1, 2007

Box. Flipped.
Plaster Town Cop
My stream just crapped out, does anybody have a good one?

Marching Powder
Mar 8, 2008



stop the fucking fight, cornerman, your dude is fucking done and is about to be killed.

Writer Cath posted:

My stream just crapped out, does anybody have a good one?

not great, but they work. i hope you've got an ad blocker. http://firstrowau.eu/sport/boxing-wwe-ufc.html

Gay Horney
Feb 10, 2013

by Reene

DumbWhiteGuy posted:

nah it's just the steroids



He looks like the dude in that Geico commercial where they call each other bro a lot.

ayn rand hand job posted:

Tyson on commentary!?

Yessssssss

I'm so hyped for this! I'm also really hyped to not hear joe rogan

Team_q
Jul 30, 2007

Gramps posted:

The 2 main fights are ludicrous, which much of the time is more enjoyable than a really great competitive, technical fight.

I too, miss Pride.

OJ MIST 2 THE DICK
Sep 11, 2008

Anytime I need to see your face I just close my eyes
And I am taken to a place
Where your crystal minds and magenta feelings
Take up shelter in the base of my spine
Sweet like a chica cherry cola

-Cheap Trick

Nap Ghost

Team_q posted:

I too, miss Pride.

If you dont miss pride youre dead inside

LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

ayn rand hand job posted:

Tyson on commentary!?

Yessssssss

You missed :ortiz: on prelim commentary for the TROOP FITE

https://vine.co/v/irWe03pbKwv

https://vine.co/v/irWiKW3ALwX

https://vine.co/v/irWiHvjnbar

Le Saboteur
Dec 5, 2007

I hear you wish to ball, adventurer..
I like that in Bellator nobody really cares about making weight.

Le Saboteur
Dec 5, 2007

I hear you wish to ball, adventurer..
Holy poo poo the stream I have is skipping all over the place.

Charles Gnarwin
Jul 31, 2014

I joined the #RXT REVOLUTION.
:boom:
he knows...


Sanchez has the smallest tattoos ever

Writer Cath
Apr 1, 2007

Box. Flipped.
Plaster Town Cop

Le Saboteur posted:

Holy poo poo the stream I have is skipping all over the place.

This might work?

http://taima.tv/r/mma

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DumbWhiteGuy
Jul 4, 2007

You need haters. Fellas if you got 20 haters, you need 40 of them motherfuckers. If there's any haters in here that don't have nobody to hate on, feel free to hate on me

God drat, he never disappoints does he?

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