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TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


Awwwww yiss.




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TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


On today's episode of "Food that is impossible to photograph without looking like dog vomit": delicious goddamn curry. Can't wait to eat it though.

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


Look at all you motherfuckers who are from Not Texas and haven't experienced the glory of HEB. (everything else about Texas pretty much sucks but HEB is the best grocery store ever and has like 3-4 house brands, all of which are great, even the super-value one for the most part. Also they pay pretty well and don't treat their employees like subhumans so I don't feel bad giving them my money)

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


Xen Tricks posted:

I don't know why kind of trash HEBs you've been in but they're by far the best around here, great selection and also not apparently organized by blind idiots like yours are.

Possibly the poo poo ones in south Austin, otherwise known as the ghetto HEB and the slightly-less-ghetto-but-still-trash HEB. Those are just sad. The ones elsewhere in Austin and the ones in Kyle and San Marcos own bones.

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


FFT posted:

that actually looks like it could be tasty



it's only looking at it now that i realize someone did a terrible slicing job

I made a pizza tonight that looked about like that, but at least I didn't take a picture of it. And it was delicious despite the fact I'm balls at shaping pizza dough and it got cut funny. #nopizzarules

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


Helios Grime posted:

I think the mystery brown sauce is balsamico from the (hopefully) caprese salad

If you think that's mozzarella and not tofu you haven't spent long enough in this thread.

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


GOTTA STAY FAI posted:


We moved to Victoria last year and all these assholes who scream "EVERYTHING'S BIGGER IN TEXAS" are liars. The deer are the size of rat terriers and the squirrels are so scrawny there'd be no meat to be had if you tried to eat one.

I have never seen a town with a higher population of juggalos than Victoria, and I feel like that may be relevant here

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


It's a good dog, Brent

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


Cakefarts Carol posted:

pineapple/goat cheese/roast garlic would probably taste amazing, drat

absolutely would, without hesitation

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


That account is gold, Italians getting mad at American pizza/pasta are always hilarious (and justified). "Why is there no Starbucks in Italy?" "Because we actually like coffee"

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


Bubblyblubber posted:

The Brazilian northeast has a type of moqueca (fish/seafood stew, usually with a palm oil base) made with soft shell crabs and it tastes so goddamn good and looks so so bad



oh yeah baby stuff those face huggers straight in my moist throat

This looks absolutely amazing and I need a trustworthy recipe for it like...yesterday

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


Pookah posted:

I love that you are supposed to specifically use Kerrygold butter in this magic concoction when Kerrygold is basically a brand name slapped on the ordinary butter sold in every irish supermarket -(unless you buy small-batch locally produced butter) it's all coming from the big co-op dairies, not enchanted Kerrygold cows.

I buy Kerrygold because yeah, it's generic mass-produced Irish butter but that still puts it head and shoulders above most mass-produced American butter

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


Away all Goats posted:

They just really like cheese. I remember when I went to Chik fil a and you could just order a side of cheese to dip your fries in. It was awesome.

The restaurant where I work makes a scratch-made queso that's amazing and any time we have a bunch left at the end of the night, the GM of the pizza place next door conveniently swings by to take a pint or so off our hands. She goes back to the pizza place and makes a large pizza with 4+ toppings, then drenches it in queso.

She looks exactly like you think she does.

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet



Wrong thread, friend. Would (immediately feel terrible about myself and go to the gym twice a day for a couple weeks)

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


el dorito posted:

avocado and salt is a delicious snack

Add some lime juice and maybe a bit of habanero sauce and this is my regular work snack, avocados are delicious but they need seasoning

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


Is a banana a sandwich or a pie?

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


angerbeet posted:


e: They'd also be good for an Otto Titsling or Springtime for Hitler drag costume.

I appreciate this reference, which is rarely seen in the wild

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


I took a picture but my phone's been really stubborn lately so for whatever reason it didn't save - have a GIS picture instead. I cooked up a bunch of breakfast taco meat this morning to save for a few days and one of them was chorizo, a meat which is absolute god-tier but visually indistinguishable from canned dog food. Even when thrown in with eggs and cheese and tortilla and hot sauce it's a bit offputting to look at. Goddamn if it isn't delicious though.

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


bike tory posted:

Are you talking about Calpis? I kinda like that~


The restaurant I work at sells Calpico as well as several variants of ramune, and I never know how to describe what Calpico tastes like. I know it's supposed to be yogurt based but it really just kinda tastes like super watered down, vaguely citrusy Gatorade to me with maybe a bit of yogurt-water weirdness to it. I don't particularly like it but I did my bit and at least now I know

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet



An entire half teaspoon of ginger, how will they ever handle the heat?

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


TotalLossBrain posted:

guilty. My local grocery store carries these in the bulk section.



I put the drat things on anything I can get away with, too

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


LifeSunDeath posted:

I got all the ingredients off of amazon a while back...my friend who's an amateur chef and goes to the asian market often makes it for me, so I get my fix that way. I had it in japan a ton of times, they have these lovely instant mapo dofu kits that are still way good, but nothing like my friend who makes it super authentic. Again, I feel like I've never seen it in Texas, but I feel like people would love it cause to me it's the ultimate comfort food but chinese.

This is the one my friend makes:


Depending on where you are in Texas you can totally find it; the Chinese place I used to work in San Marcos makes it (and it's not bad). I don't know why it's so uncommon to find but it should definitely not be

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet



congrats, thousands of pages and this was what finally made my stomach physically turn

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


the point of pie is the nice crispy crust mixing with the gooey filling and giving it some texture and structure, goddamn goons, how are y'all eating pie

eat pudding or cobbler if you don't want the crust

also please blind bake your crusts, it's night and day

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet



...gonna just go run back out to HEB for a sec, for uh

reasons

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


Bacardi Limon is virtually tasteless in Mountain Dew and the reason my friend is no longer allowed into Pleasure Island at Disneyworld

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


The Bloop posted:

That and that pleasure island doesn't exist anymore

Huh, I haven't been back since and don't really pay attention to Disneyworld, didn't know that

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


Our chicken fried steak is frozen and reheated/fried and it is Not Good

the chicken fried chicken is hand breaded and actual chicken, and is delicious. Mac and cheese is water-cooked in bigass retort pouches, portioned, cooled and then reheated. Mashed potatoes are made from scratch, then either cooled and re-steamed later or kept in a warmer for four hours

we apparently used to do the "use the fryer to cook soups" thing despite having a 6-burner range but the GM caught someone doing it like her first week here and had a fit that the prep cooks still remember, so we don't do that anymore

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


My mom is an early Boomer (born 1945) and basically hasn't changed her recipe collection since the early 80s. She has a collection of old neighborhood/church recipe books from the 70s and they are a fantastic look at Louisiana/Texas white people food. I make a chicken spaghetti of hers sometimes that includes canned mushrooms, cream of mushroom soup, canned chicken, shaky cheese and jarred pimentos and it's loving delicious, I have no idea why. I tried making it with real food once and it just wasn't the same. Good, but that nostalgia for the aggressively mediocre childhood comfort food is real and changing it feels wrong.

e: the recipe calls for oleo, which I'm like 100% sure isn't even a thing anymore (it's just margarine anyway)

TheKennedys has a new favorite as of 15:38 on Oct 15, 2019

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


evobatman posted:

My mom is cleaning out the attic in our house, and found a cheese sandwich in a jacket that my brother last used when he was 10.



My brother is 34 now.

surprisingly well preserved

still would, and I cannot stress this enough, not

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


Stink Terios posted:

People here in Brazil like to shove raw spoonfuls of Ninho into their mouth holes.
I can just imagine how dry it must feel...

my best friend is a weirdo that sometimes eats straight kratom instead of like making a tea or something, and that's all I could think of when I read this

it's a thought that offends my already notoriously touchy guts

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


CannonFodder posted:


And for dumb things eaten as a kid: I would eat chicken bouillon cubes. mmm salty

My oldest son and I both joke that we're basically deer, we both did poo poo like that as kids and occasionally still do with minimal shame. Give me a salt lick (help I am probably dangerously dehydrated)

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


Eggs at the very least are a thing, the whites absorb some of the bitterness and the whole thing serves to clump up the grounds so they don't get in poo poo. I don't think I'd try it with fish though

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


Hot dog buns + margarine + garlic salt + cheap shredded store brand "mozzarella" under the broiler for a few minutes is still my go-to poverty side for anything even vaguely Italian

Add tomato sauce or spaghetti sauce if you're fancy and you've got pizza

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


RoboRodent posted:

You know, as a kid, I really disliked Ren and Stimpy. I watched a little bit of it but I was a squeamish kid and things that relied heavily on gross-out humour bothered me a lot.

As I grew older, I recognized this about myself, became more comfortable with fart jokes, and generally relaxed on this topic.

Today I look at this picture and I think that kid me was right. What the gently caress.

this sums up my experience with 90s grossout cartoons nicely, thank you

still have zero urge to watch Ren and Stimpy

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


Sandwich Anarchist posted:

Well at least we HAVE some of that down here

goddamn it's like y'all are trying to summon the ghost of jastiger

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


The Bloop posted:

Those are exactly how I look if I accidently consume green bell pepper

really, green bell pepper is just a taste I can't learn to like

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TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet


the only times I've managed a college level hangover and puked my guts out in the past decade have been the time my brother convinced me to drink sake, and the time my boss convinced me to try again to drink sake

I will no longer try sake

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