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Aristide posted:Thinking about it, Next Life also had unlikable characters, an inane plot, and time travel. It did not have the sweet RNG that the 3rd birthday has though which is the only reason I've found to actually read updates instead of just skimming at this point. Yeah - Id's commentary is helping, but this whole game is turning out to be a tepid slog (other than the story parts where it's utterly infuriating, of course).
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Jun 7, 2016 04:54
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Oxxidation posted:The New York subway is borderline-eldritch already, I don't blame SE too much for giving up on trying to understand it.
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Jun 7, 2016 05:34
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AradoBalanga posted:You'd think they'd at least get the correct subway lines for the area, not bring over subway lines that are at least several blocks away from Grand Central for no real explained reason. Like, if they threw in a comment about the Twisted distorting time and space, it'd make sense. But they don't and expect the player to take it as is without explanation. Well, what are the odds that someone familiar with New York City would actually play the game? Clearly they couldn't afford to pander to such a minuscule demographic.
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Jun 7, 2016 05:47
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Sorry Id, looks like Squeenix still believes that Dirge of Cerberus exists. I'm so sorry. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N4Gz7BislTw Meanwhile someone seems to be taking terrible inspiration from you.
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Jun 7, 2016 05:57
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Solitair posted:Well, what are the odds that someone familiar with New York City would actually play the game? Clearly they couldn't afford to pander to such a minuscule demographic. At least those trains looked like credible stand-ins for the type you'd see on the IRT lines.
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Jun 7, 2016 06:01
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So one of the gameplay mechanics is... going chibi. I've definitely seen worse from them.
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Jun 7, 2016 06:27
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After that bit of Snatcher music, I must ask. If Konami didn't decide to say "screw you" to console gaming and were on better terms with Hideo Kojima, what do you think Snatcher would be like post-MGS5?
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Jun 7, 2016 06:54
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ACES CURE PLANES posted:Sorry Id, looks like Squeenix still believes that Dirge of Cerberus exists. I'm so sorry.
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Jun 7, 2016 07:11
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Solitair posted:Well, what are the odds that someone familiar with New York City would actually play the game? Clearly they couldn't afford to pander to such a minuscule demographic. Those aren't Japanese teenage boys, which are the only people Square-Enix cares about attracting.
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Jun 7, 2016 07:43
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Derek Barona posted:Anyone who reads the update title and didn't hear this has my pity. I didn't hear that, I heard this.
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Jun 7, 2016 08:33
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Well, plus side, looking around I can confirm that the Japanese version seems to have the same naming scheme for soldiers. Also that a fair number of Japanese LPers need better capture resolution. Also looked up Firmin for the heck of it. Oddly enough it looks to be a French first name and an English family name, so it feels entirely possible that we might RNG up a Firmin Firmin. The Dark Id posted:avoid fighting Rovers because those guys sucks
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Jun 7, 2016 09:00
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ACES CURE PLANES posted:Sorry Id, looks like Squeenix still believes that Dirge of Cerberus exists. I'm so sorry. well as long as they stay away from Red the Red, Blue the Blue and Black the Black
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Jun 7, 2016 09:42
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why
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Jun 7, 2016 14:04
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All that artistic talent and they do things like that?
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Jun 7, 2016 14:06
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ACES CURE PLANES posted:Sorry Id, looks like Squeenix still believes that Dirge of Cerberus exists. I'm so sorry. Can someone explain the Shelke pic and how it relates to Id? It's been a long time since I read his Dirge of Cerberus LP.
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Jun 7, 2016 14:37
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It was more a jokey comment than anything, just a horrifying mashup of two characters from stuff he's played that I was unfortunate enough to stumble across.
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Jun 7, 2016 14:47
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Twitch posted:I didn't hear that, I heard this. It's still Snatcher, so you're forgiven. ACES CURE PLANES posted:Sorry Id, looks like Squeenix still believes that Dirge of Cerberus exists. I'm so sorry. Should I feel bad that I actually sorta wanna check this game out? It basically looks like they're going for Super Robot Wars FF here, which could be fun if done well.
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Jun 7, 2016 23:31
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Part XIX: I Am Russo.jpg)  New Music: Uncontrol Well… This is happening now. Aya Brea is on top of a speeding subway train presumably hijacked by the Twisted. Or a rogue ghost, perhaps? Who knows! We’ll be given no explanation as to how or why this sequence is occurring. Also, this subway car is moving about 40+ MPH on a straight path for a solid three minutes. I’m fairly certain there isn’t that much straight tunnel in any part of mid-town Manhattan. But details… .jpg)  [What now? She can't just jump off!] [Don't worry - she doesn't have to.].jpg) Yeah, don’t be such a drama queen, Blank. Everyone knows the NYC metro tunnels have a clearing height high enough for three grown adults to stand atop one another’s shoulders and still have several feet of clearance. And Giuliani had invisible wall safety nets installed atop all subway trains following 9/11. It’s perfectly safe for Aya to combat a horde of Blue Slacker and momentum ignoring Wad Twisted on this speeding train car. .jpg) And not to worry, help arrives in the form of another train car slamming into the back of our runaway train. Firmin Hannawald has some real rear end comrades, I’ll tell you what. .jpg) Erskine Becker and Manuel Zhu take no prisoners as they lay into the swarm of Twisted trying to reenact the end of Speed. Just an aside here as we cruise down the abandoned subway. This mission takes place a good 11 months before the events of the intro depicting the seemingly untouched Manhattan. Grand Central Terminal and the entire metro system of Manhattan has been a nest of pan-dimensional aliens for at least a year’s time, with nobody saying boo or being worried. Just for some perspective on how poorly put together this series’ timeline of events is orchestrated. .jpg) As for actually combatting the Twisted in these close quarters. And let’s be real here: this is just effectively a tight hallway with a fancy skybox. There are zero effects of being on a speeding train. Aya and her enemies possess the exact same movement speed, there are no obstacles to be avoided, and there is no time limit to conclude the battle. You could transport this fight to a sterile gray corridor and achieve the same gameplay. .jpg) As for the actual combat here, the Twisted mostly spawn in on the far end of the train cars from Aya and will shamble towards her. If we just wait until they reach Aya and roll past as they fruitlessly attempt to strike her i-frames, the Slackers will all bunch together. Those boys don’t exactly turn on a dime and cannot phase through one another. .jpg) .jpg) .jpg) And the best way to deal with grouped enemies is, of course, lobbing a grenade in their general direction. No worries. The invisible wall works on loose grenades rolling about. .jpg) Once that’s sorted out, Aya only needs to deal with the stragglers and probably a stray Wad or two, whose AI has absolutely no idea what to do in a tight corridor setting. .jpg) .jpg) Once the last of the Twisted are dealt with, Aya’s out of control ride crashes headlong into a mass of Babel roots and… .jpg) …I cannot believe Aya Brea is loving dead! I mean, I’d be surprised if they somehow had her miraculously survive a train derailing at full speed in a collapsed tunnel while she was standing unsecured on the top of the thing. But he— Music: Pain of Assault .jpg) Oh wait. Never mind. She just stands right up a few seconds later after being flung headlong into the pavement. False alarm. Had those other two soldiers survived the fight, they would have both died on impact and vanished between scenes. Glad we went with durable tough man Erskine Becker. .jpg) .jpg) Following the crash, Aya has managed to find herself smack dab in the last Snatcher nest in the tunnels and in the middle of a massive clusterfuck of about a dozen of the creatures. A small detachment of Delta Force operatives rush in to see what the hell was going on with a train crashing, much less running in the first place, in these derelict tunnels. .jpg) .jpg) Having at least 5-6 Snatchers moving in from all directions makes for a quite hairy battle. Poor Aya’s outfit was not able to stand against the onslaught of four mine orbs firing off camera and into her rear end all at once. And then the Stalker warping into a fight directly above her to immediately snag her for processing into the human meat grinder dimension. .jpg) But, I wasn’t entirely correct about there being no way to free Aya if she’s snagged by a Snatcher. She will become released should she enter Liberation mode as soon as she is ensnared by a Twisted. And since we’re in Liberation Mode… .jpg) Erskine Becker, it’s time to die for your country in a blaze of glory as a time traveling magic woman detonates every cell in your body for an easy instant-win. Your comrades will honor your sacrifice. .jpg) And hey. Technically nobody was taken away by a Snatcher. Job well done, Aya. You did some fine work here today. You’re getting a big fat paycheck bonus for that that skillful use of converting unsuspecting soldiers into tactical nukes. .jpg) [She doesn't need me anymore.] [Come on, Chief. Don't say that. We have trust in you!] [Trust can sometimes be a dangerous thing.] [Yeah, that’s not ominous or anything.] [Just thinking aloud.] …Music: Dive Into Cause .jpg) That concludes Chapter 3-2. But we are not quite done with the mission yet. Following the Snatcher nest, Aya finds herself in another makeshift Delta Force outpost. Let’s see what the troops are up to in their downtime. .jpg)  All my friends are dying... Something's not right. What's going on? Look how close we've gotten to the interior! You know they're going to cover this up. Heart rate 98... That's approaching sinus tachycardia. I guess even I can get wound up. Chester, stay calm. At this point, it's all we have. Heart rate, respiration, body temp, blood pressure, pupillary response, waste output... If I neglect any of these, I can't do my best work. You’re just afraid you’re going to poo poo your pants just like Fearon did. Hey! We’re in a subway tunnel. Not a sewer. We can all smell it, Darnel. That’s not going to happen to me. That’s not happening. I’m at my peak. My peak..jpg) Before we proceed to the conclusion of this episode, let’s sort out a bit of inventory in the future. The AS-20 Sniper Rifle has unlocked since our last log-in. Maybe I’ll buy one sometime. But this is not that day. .jpg) Indeed, the only thing we’re going to do here is give Aya’s mental avatar a bit of dignity and repair her shredded clothes. Part of me was disappointed they didn’t bother to put in any of Aya’s costumes from Parasite Eve 1 or 2 as bonus outfits. But then I realized they’d be subject to the same creepy injured fan service mechanics and ehh… I’m good. Before we move on out of the safe zone and into the final area, Hyde phones up one last time…  [There are no records of you having a younger sister named Eve. But we'll keep looking. I don't think you're lying about having a sister. The records could have been deleted by someone. I'll let you know if I find anything.]Aya Brea, do not tell me you got lazy and just fudged the paperwork when adopting your clone. That is incredibly irresponsible. Now you’ve got amnesia and you look like a drat fool caught with your pants down with no documentation. Sheesh. No wonder you’re such a mess. .jpg) .jpg) Heading out from the safe zone, we find ourselves at the bottom of a massive sinkhole overlooking several abandoned cars and some wrecked buildings. Again, this is supposed to be January 2012. The intro movie with the Babels emerging and wrecking Manhattan was December 2012. There has been no timeline fuckery. This mission was already mentioned way back in the initial timeline prior to any Overdive plot shenanigans. .jpg) Hey, Deok. Yeah you. Deok Lamprecht. What the hell are you pointing at there? I know it’s an impressive display of ruin. But have some trigger discipline. There is supposed to be civilians up there, ya kn— Music: Time of Insanity .jpg) WHOOPS! Never mind! Open fire! .jpg) .jpg) For the final battle in this big open pit, we’ve got an absolute mess of (just a starter) a pair Rollers, a Rover, a handful of Wads, and a Bean up high. .jpg) .jpg) This is also an introduction to the upgraded Beans. They look and operate exactly like the original recipe. Only now they can teleport to different positions on the map. Mostly, those that are obnoxiously out of the way from normal interception. .jpg) Though this new variety of Bean does have a fatal flaw in the form of… Well… I mean let’s be honest here. Beans already looked like a pair of legged butts in their closed forms. That’s just an rear end in a top hat we’re looking at through this sniper scope… .jpg) Sure enough, sticking some hot lead up its bung-hole is enough to both highly damage the bean and cancel its regeneration/defended cycle, leaving it stunned and ready for an Overdive Kill and whatever other punishment it needs to finish the fight. .jpg) Once Aya has chewed through a significant chunk of the Twisted in the area, a second wave warps into the battleground. This time it begins with a pair of Rovers, a Roller, and another squadron of Wads. Buuuuuut… that isn’t too much to worry about. .jpg) For you see, as soon as we either knock out a couple of the lesser baddies or survive for about thirty seconds, Blank calls in and informs… well Hyde for some reason… but regardless, there is another satellite cannon targeting system in play! .jpg) Radd Ichikawa is here to bring fury from the heavens. Hell yeah! Most appropriate random name yet. .jpg) .jpg) The remainder of this battle is just hanging out in almost complete cover and rain death upon the battlefield. Upgraded Beans, Rovers, and Rollers all stand zero chance against a single shot from the orbital cannon. .jpg) Hey, Sheik. You gonna get Ottkeway or what? That Rover isn’t playing around, buddy. No? No, you’re just going to stand there taking pot shots. Welp… I gave you a fair warning, guy. .jpg) Pictured: Our game’s heroine, Aya Brea, literally vaporizing a comrade. .jpg) Also again, before we conclude this battle, I’d like to again remind you that a satellite weapon is raining death down on central Manhattan 11 months before things supposedly went to poo poo. I’ll have to look back to see if the Twisted were supposed to be some covered up myth still at this point. Music: Girl in the Dream .jpg) As is usual par for the course, the rest of the soldiers present on the battlefield just moments earlier have instantly cleared out so Radd Ichikawa can have what outwardly appears to be a psychotic episode. .jpg) Aya attempts to contact the elusive Captain Russo, but her communications are met only with static. I’m not sure how we were getting crystal clear radio reception earlier in the tunnels. But there are many details off here. .jpg) Aya coughs on a bit of the vaporized Twisted particles, asbestos, and whatever other nasty particles would be floating around a sinkhole in the middle of Manhattan before noticing something that catches her eye… .jpg) Well, it’s a good thing none of the Delta Force operators, whose mission was to destroy the Big Orb in the subway system, actually took the time to fire on the Big Orb in the subway system. They must have known Aya Brea was coming to have an anime bullshit session and aborted the operation. It was very kind of them. .jpg) .jpg) [A ghost?] [No way!] [Who would we even call?!].jpg) Blank, please don’t read ahead in The 3rd Birthday’s script. You’re going to ruin it for everyone else. .jpg) Aya is... seeing the possibility of Eve's existence! She's seeing the “possibility”? I… Could you clarify what that means? *breathes deeply* No. I see….jpg) .jpg)  I don't know..jpg) Aya, let’s think about this. Even if you could reach the unstuck from time theoretical wave existence that is your clone little sister… how are you going to get her back to the future? Did you even think about that, Aya Brea? Did you? New Music: Monodrama .jpg) .jpg) Aya, are you prepared for some Monodrama? .jpg) The soldier throws off his helmet… .jpg) .jpg) …I beg your pardon? Is this supposed to be some sort of plot twist. I mean the dramatic reveal and music would suggest so but uhh… Little help here, control? .jpg) Now I’m going to assume the mugshot Blank is pulling up is the actual Captain Danny Russo. I’m really not sure if that was supposed to be Cray impersonating Russo the entire time ala Miller/Liquid Snake in Metal Gear Solid. Especially, since neither of them have a particularly distinct voice even before a radio filter is applied. And even then… it’s not like Russo did anything besides reporting in a few times telling Aya to hurry the hell up. You know what? Don’t worry about it! Hyde hits a button presumably connected to CTI’s PA system… .jpg) He has compromised a mission from January 2012. He must be stopped at all costs!.jpg) .jpg) Computer nerd Blank hops out of his chair and peels out of the Overdive room. Yeah, no need to monitor Aya and yank her out incase things go sideways. You go track down Cray or take a poo poo or whatever it is you gotta do, guy. .jpg) Cray circles around Aya toward the Big Orb. I’m sure this all has a reasonable explanation. This would have been a really weird revelation if we hadn’t bothered going back in time to prevent Cray from getting killed a few days earlier in that last timeline. .jpg) Isabella?.jpg)  My… only daughter..jpg) Ehh… Guy, your daughter looks an awfully lot like a young Aya. But hey, you’re clearly loving this poo poo. I won’t spoil your fun with pesky details. .jpg) I did it. I killed everyone. …Umm. I’m not certain about that. The Twisted did get a lot of them. And there was the couple… unfortunate Overdive… accidents… And some collateral damage with the satellite weapon… No. This is all just as I planned. I got them all. Even the ones that just ran out after that fight..jpg) … Does that mean you were Russo, or… I’m just trying to follow this, Cray. What? No… I’m not Russo. I just got mixed up. I was excited… I’ve waited for this moment….jpg) I'll protect her..jpg) .jpg) Graaawbaawkhaw!.jpg) Cray! Eve!.jpg) So if you're really confused right now! Good. Congrats! Ditto! I have no idea what all of this is supposed to be or where it came from! I strongly feel like the script was eaten by a dog on Toriyama's writing staff right around here. Especially considering what happens following this episode's conclusion. Why did Cray covertly murder his own team off-camera? How does he know Aya is here (remember she looks like some nobody Delta Force guy!) Why does she think (the quantum theory of) Eve that is hanging out in the Babel Orb is his daughter? You got me! .jpg) .jpg) .jpg) Tune in next time for the    Video: Part 19 Highlight Reel (Hey, someone’s actually acting animated for once.)   Cray Portrait Concepts – Yep… That sure is a nondescript black guy. The Dark Id fucked around with this message at 00:16 on Jun 8, 2016 |
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Jun 7, 2016 23:40
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Derek Barona posted:Should I feel bad that I actually sorta wanna check this game out? It basically looks like they're going for Super Robot Wars FF here, which could be fun if done well. God drat it I have too many games on my plate as is and I want to check that out, just to see where it goes. Gotta be more loving cohesive than what ID's playing.
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Jun 7, 2016 23:44
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Someone mind explaining what just happened? I don't understand. 
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Jun 7, 2016 23:47
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What.
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Jun 7, 2016 23:49
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So... is EVERYONE going to inexplicably hold Aya at gunpoint? Was the game trying to imply that Eve and Cray's daughter somehow occupy the same 'slot' in existence and are mutually exclusive in the timestream??
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Jun 7, 2016 23:56
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The Hell was that?! Okay, I can assume that the girl is some kind of Twisted trick that looks like someone you care about to trick you into becoming a boss. That works well enough, even though no psychic powers have been established for these things. Absolutely nothing involving Cray made any sense. Especially not the order to detain him for a past version of himself. The answers to my questions on this bizarre contrivance will almost certainly be stupid.
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Jun 8, 2016 00:00
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Siiiiiiiiigh. 
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Jun 8, 2016 00:02
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What? The possibility of Eve? But she existed! None of this amnesia and twisted crap happened until after PE2, so there is no "possibility" here! Maybe a possibility of her continuing to exist after a certain point in time, sure, but dying doesn't erase the fact that somebody did exist at some point! And what kind of lame time travel story has changes in the future retconing previous events!? WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS GAME!?!
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Jun 8, 2016 00:02
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That just raises further questions! 
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Jun 8, 2016 00:04
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Well, that sure was...a thing.
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Jun 8, 2016 00:05
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...Oh.
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Jun 8, 2016 00:07
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Oh come the gently caress on.
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Jun 8, 2016 00:10
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Geostomp posted:Okay, I can assume that the girl is some kind of Twisted trick that looks like someone you care about to trick you into becoming a boss. That works well enough, even though no psychic powers have been established for these things. Absolutely nothing involving Cray made any sense. Especially not the order to detain him for a past version of himself. This was my thought process too, which means that no one in the game will consider that until just before the final boss where they go "WOAH ACTUALLY IT'S NOT I honestly... don't know anymore EDIT: Also how the hell did the mission report for this mission not include "THEN CRAY LEAPT INTO THE BORB AND DIED THEN ALSO SURVIVED" Danaru fucked around with this message at 00:22 on Jun 8, 2016 |
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Jun 8, 2016 00:20
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Dr. Fetus posted:Someone mind explaining what just happened? I don't understand. I don't think anyone would mind explaining. I don't think anyone is capable of explaining. My only theory is that somehow people are doing the FFXIII/Noir theme of "let's make things so hosed up God has to show up to fix it and/or make things so hosed up that God will forgive everyone because no one else in the history of ever has hosed up this much."
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Jun 8, 2016 00:26
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So, there's no story, is there? I mean, they toss in these double crosses and "twists" and whatever on the off chance that, if you're not paying attention, you might assume that there was some really dumb story that you lost track of. But there's not even that. There's no story, none at all. Just events that are intended to fool you if, by this point, you're just mashing a button through the cutscenes and trying to get the whole thing over with.
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Jun 8, 2016 00:39
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See, I could follow the time-stream fuckery of XIII-2 just fine. This?  I refuse to believe someone actually read this script and approved it, Toriyama had to have bribed the editors or just straight up bypassed them. Malachite_Dragon fucked around with this message at 00:42 on Jun 8, 2016 |
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Jun 8, 2016 00:40
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I... I... What? What? Why is Cray evil now? Didn't we save his rear end before? What the gently caress do they mean by the possibility of Eve's existence? Words are happening and I understand most of the words individually, but then I read them in a sentence and nothing makes any sense.
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Jun 8, 2016 00:48
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I think neurosyphilis isn't out of the question.
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Jun 8, 2016 00:55
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The Dark Id posted:
I loved this.
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Jun 8, 2016 01:03
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Like, has there been anything up to this point to indicate that Cray's daughter died, causing him to willingly betray and then help murder his entire unit in order to protect/bring back from the dead? Because his bio mentions her exactly loving once and never again. You're loving stupid, The 3rd Birthday, and you're making poo poo up just to give yourself an excuse to make us fight people on the support team as bosses. At least, y'know, when we fought people who had been or were going to be in the party in other games, it had a point. Fighting Red and Caim had a point, even if that point was "Berserk goddamn dragon on the loose" or "OH GOD CAIM'S TRYING TO KILL ME". This is just trying to make you feel bad about being betrayed by someone you're supposed to care about but in reality you really don't even have a loving reason to give a poo poo here because he's been loving GONE in some way or another for most of this game so far, and we already did the sudden but inevitable betrayal bullshit route last chapter with Owen! You're loving stupid, The 3rd Birthday, and I hope saying that makes you feel bad and want to cry. 
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Jun 8, 2016 01:11
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Malachite_Dragon posted:See, I could follow the time-stream fuckery of XIII-2 just fine. And yet, this betrayal has the foundation of what is clearly something that was either dropped or heavily rewritten during development. With Owen, that was just dumb petty behavior all the way down and nothing in that twist held weight. Here, there is a kernel of potential in all of this mess that could have been turned into something: Cray suffering from what looks like severe PTSD and going crazy is a lead-in for an interesting plot development and a chance to expand Cray's character. But nope, the staff on this game think that Shocking Twists For Pure Shock ValueTM is all a game needs to have a plot. Fleshed out and well-developed characters are unimportant for this development team. The option to play as a bloodied, nearly naked protagonist is the #1 top priority, however.
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Jun 8, 2016 01:16
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AradoBalanga posted:
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Apophenia
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Jun 8, 2016 01:25
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I'll admit, Cray's betrayal looks more believable compared to Owen's, if only because we've gotten to (barely) know Cray more compared to Owen. And in the hands of someone who could write, this twist could be something better. But maybe I'm just looking for this game to start being coherent and not just drop things in because someone without anyone to reign them in thought it sounded good. I'm fully expecting this wind up being something dumb like a fever dream imagined by Maeda after a night of bar hopping or something even dumber. Hell, I'll take the St. Elsewhere twist at this point.
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Jun 8, 2016 01:41
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