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thread1 from 7/23/2009 to 8/3/2010 http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3175682 thread2 from 3/4/2012 to 5/23/2012 http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3470495 Since 5/23/2012 BFC probably called the majority of this - my daughter #2 born in early 2013 - 4 bedroom house purchased in mid 2013 - marriage slowly dying from 2013-2015. same old zaurg, same old zwife, both refusing to take it head on and fix poo poo or get out, just letting it slowly die. - wife says she wants to separate in mid 2015. - got counseling through professionals a couple times and 3 awesome friends - lawyered up, proceeded with divorce process - back and forth divorce process - finally divorced officially in early 2016 - refinanced house to take ex off - ex moved out of house - sold my condo - I'm still living in house - 50/50 time sharing - Told myself I'd live here with kids for the remainder of 2016 and see how it goes. I know I should sell. Giving it till end of year to see how it goes Just a small OP and will share a lot more about the finances. The past ~5 months has been the happiest most content period in my life.
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May 10, 2016 03:39
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| # ? Apr 20, 2024 01:32 |
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 late edit but this HAS to be in the first reply https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pAgnJDJN4VA ok zaurg is back but probably NOT in the black paperchaseguy fucked around with this message at 02:44 on May 27, 2016 |
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May 10, 2016 03:52
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Hi Zaurg how many MLMs are you on the mailing list for
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May 10, 2016 03:59
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Your wife moved out of the house instead of making you move out? That's surprising. This tells me that (a) your house is a shithole, (b) she wants to move in with the guy she's now loving, or (c) both. Which do you think it is?
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May 10, 2016 04:10
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thamk u zaurg more questions to follow but for now thamk u
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May 10, 2016 04:14
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This thread will feel like the guy who waited at the train station for the super awesome cool old train that will only ever pass by once and as soon as it starts to roll into view a commuter train pulls up and stops. Right now we are giddy that the train is arriving. This isn't the video, but it's Zaurg level effort close enough: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kBBK2hjcPuA
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May 10, 2016 04:21
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Why am I not surprised that the decision to divorce wasn't made by zaurg either? Good thing his lungs are on autopilot otherwise he'd have keeled over 2 minutes after being born
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May 10, 2016 04:22
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Weatherman posted:Why am I not surprised that the decision to divorce wasn't made by zaurg either? I just want to see how badly he got ripped apart in the settlement.
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May 10, 2016 04:25
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zaurg posted:thread1 from 7/23/2009 to 8/3/2010 Did you get a paternity test for the second child?
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May 10, 2016 04:27
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SarutosZero posted:Hi Zaurg how many MLMs are you on the mailing list for I'm not involved with any MLMs. Giraffe posted:Your wife moved out of the house instead of making you move out? That's surprising. This tells me that (a) your house is a shithole, (b) she wants to move in with the guy she's now loving, or (c) both. Which do you think it is? None of the above. House is nice. She tried for months to convince me she should remain here. She eventually had to give in and take my buyout and move out. House had about ~80k equity in it after fees, so 50% buyout would've meant giving her 40k. Divorce agreement ended with me giving her 20k. I used most of my IRA to cover that. I was desperate to get it done and that seemed like the only/best option aside from selling the house and giving her half. Of course this resulted in a tax penalty. My 401k stayed 100% mine. Her student loans that will never go away - are now 100% hers. My condo stayed 100% mine. Condo was rented for the past 3 years but was I not making a profit so I sold it recently and banked a little bit from it. I'm not paying any child support or alimony. Kids are split for childcare/school costs, I pay one, she pays the other. For other child costs (medical, activities), I pay 60%, she pays 40%. Furniture was split up. She took master bedroom set. Left kids rooms as they are which was nice to keep it the same here.
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May 10, 2016 04:29
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zaurg posted:I'm not involved with any MLMs. I'm starting to think you hired a good lawyer and had a reasonable judge
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May 10, 2016 04:32
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Gumbel2Gumbel posted:I'm starting to think you hired a good lawyer and had a reasonable judge A great lawyer and awesome advice from a bunch of older divorced guys. Without that I would've been something like what Weatherman would best describe. Spent $7k on lawyer which was a lot but I've heard horror divorce stories about much worse. The only court date was just to get the settlement agreement & parenting plan stamped.
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May 10, 2016 04:36
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How far in debt are you at this moment?
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May 10, 2016 04:40
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spinst posted:How far in debt are you at this moment? Technically I'm not in debt since my assets are higher than my debt (about 60k in the positive) but I'm definitely not in a very comfortable spot with only about 10k in savings account. I have a mortgage and no other debt. Tight budget month to month. Just this month is when I started tracking my expenses like I used to do years ago. I'm pretty much in a spot where when a significant expense emergency happens or job loss happens I'll have to sell the house.
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May 10, 2016 04:56
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Zaurg, I know I already said this in the other thread, but as someone who read your last two threads with a feeling of deep sadness...well, $7K was a fuckin' bargain to get out of that marriage. I'm not trying to slag off your ex- no point and I have no right- but that whole situation was horrendous and I'm glad you're done. Can I ask how the Devry loan got split up, if it did? Sorry if that's rude; you don't have to answer. 
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May 10, 2016 05:59
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Holky gently caress. It's zaurg. I'm sorry poo poo has gone badly for you, man. You deserve some self pity. Then... Use this as a springboard. Turn it all around. Be the poster child for redemption. I believe in you zaurg!
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May 10, 2016 07:16
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So who got the pool table?
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May 10, 2016 12:46
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bringmyfishback posted:Can I ask how the Devry loan got split up, if it did? Sorry if that's rude; you don't have to answer. zaurg posted:Her student loans that will never go away - are now 100% hers.
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May 10, 2016 12:56
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Ahhh finally a reason to read BFC again! Welcome back old friend!
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May 10, 2016 13:27
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What did you learn this year in 2016?
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May 10, 2016 13:40
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drat, did not expect the return of zaurg. Who has the zaurggetadivorce.gif ? Post up your budget Z man.
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May 10, 2016 13:46
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Sorry to see things were hard, glad to see things are getting better for you...even if in a tight spot. Goon support is a good thing too man. <3 Keep your head up. 
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May 10, 2016 13:59
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dreesemonkey posted:drat, did not expect the return of zaurg. Who has the zaurggetadivorce.gif ? Here you go, but it seems like it has served it's purpose. 
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May 10, 2016 14:02
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zaurg posted:Technically I'm not in debt since my assets are higher than my debt (about 60k in the positive) Not exactly how debt works... but glad to hear the mortgage is the only thing you are battling. Keep movin' in the right direction!
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May 10, 2016 14:48
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It's kinda impressive how much better your financial situation and outlook are now that zwife is out of your life. I'm happy for you.
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May 10, 2016 16:05
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Grumpwagon posted:quote Thanks, I missed that. Derp!
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May 10, 2016 16:24
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What up with the car loans?
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May 10, 2016 16:40
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I'm sad that the last couple of years went pretty much as BFC predicted - though the end result was much better than we all thought it would turn out (I think we predicted that you'd end up living a muddy shack that had a mortgage of a million dollars on it and eating your own shoes to survive)quote:The past ~5 months has been the happiest most content period in my life. I'm genuinely happy for you, dude.
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May 10, 2016 16:59
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Oh poo poo. This is the guy that inspired that gif. I've only ever heard stuff second or third hand. Dude, just like the rest, I'm glad things are going in a better direction now.
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May 10, 2016 17:02
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I came for the trainwreck but ended up happy to see that things seem like they've turned out for the best. Divorce sucks but I just don't think that marriage we saw through the other two threads was ever going to become a healthy situation. Hope things keep turning around! Wow, I just realized that Apr 2016 was the projected 'debt free date' for option one in the second thread. Kinda weird timing having this come back right about now.
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May 10, 2016 17:09
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zaurg posted:A great lawyer and awesome advice from a bunch of older divorced guys. Without that I would've been something like what Weatherman would best describe. Congratulations dude, I'm really happy for you.
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May 10, 2016 17:16
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Thanks for the kind words. Hearing congrats is still weird to me. Divorce is failing. But I admit I am much better off.GAYS FOR DAYS posted:So who got the pool table? Sold it while still living in the condo years ago. dreesemonkey posted:Post up your budget Z man. I'll do this tonight. It's ugly. spinst posted:Not exactly how debt works... but glad to hear the mortgage is the only thing you are battling. I confused debt with net worth. Total debt is a hefty 250k 30 year fixed mortgage @ 4.5%. RheaConfused posted:What up with the car loans? I don't have a car loan. I have an older car that only has about 45k miles on it, hoping it will last me a while. Planning for car replacement is a problem I have to find a solution for because it's not in my budget right now. SmuglyDismissed posted:Wow, I just realized that Apr 2016 was the projected 'debt free date' for option one in the second thread. Kinda weird timing having this come back right about now. Did not realize that. I started reading some of the older threads and man I was not in a good place.
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May 10, 2016 17:47
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  Glad to hear you're not sleeping on top of a pool table. I guess selling the house would have more to do with how much time you have the kids with you - if they are living with you, maybe not a good idea to sell. If not, then give it some time but remember that selling during the summer is usually best. When you say 50/50 timesharing, is that custody?
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May 10, 2016 18:13
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moana posted:Glad to hear you're not sleeping on top of a pool table. I guess selling the house would have more to do with how much time you have the kids with you - if they are living with you, maybe not a good idea to sell. If not, then give it some time but remember that selling during the summer is usually best. When you say 50/50 timesharing, is that custody? Big Louis CK fan. 50/50 time sharing... kids are with me 50% of the time, 50% with mom. The plan is 2/2/5/5 and it seems to be working ok. 2 nights with me, 2 nights with her, 5 nights with me, 5 nights with her, repeat. Huge adjustment for my girls. It has been a little over 2 months and I think they are handling it pretty well.
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May 10, 2016 18:22
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zaurg posted:Big Louis CK fan. I'm glad things seem to be working pretty well (for the time being, at least) With a large house and mortgage, is there any possibility of getting a roomate? I mean you'd have to personally know this person that they aren't creeps or something, but just something like that would help finances immensely. Or, since it sounds like you have equity in the home, could you find something significantly smaller/cheaper to buy/rent that wouldn't effect your custody agreement?
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May 10, 2016 18:34
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zaurg posted:Divorce is failing. Eh no, divorce is admitting you made a mistake and correcting it instead of you both just deciding you're going to be miserable the rest of your life.
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May 10, 2016 19:10
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So give the details on the stuff we wanted to know about her before that you didn't tell us because you were still married. Wonderhangers and custom chocolate bars couldn't have been the worst things she did.
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May 10, 2016 19:21
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Parallel Paraplegic posted:Eh no, divorce is admitting you made a mistake and correcting it instead of you both just deciding you're going to be miserable the rest of your life. Divorce is much like getting a household appliance removed from your rear end at the hospital: while that's may not be something to be proud of, it's just the ending of something that's gone seriously wrong with your life.
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May 10, 2016 20:03
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This is probably small potatoes compared to other issues but if your credit is in good shape and there's any chance you're keeping the house, you should be able to refinance into a substantially better rate with zero cash out of pocket. $100-200 in savings per month could make your monthly budget a lot less bad to live with.
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May 10, 2016 20:12
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zaurg posted:
This isn't really horrible all things considered.
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May 10, 2016 21:10
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