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Just admit that you're gay. Come on, you picked the one urinal which would guarantee the next dude in the bathroom has to whip out his schlong and hold it in his hand right next to you. Seriously, if you're not cruising for rear end, there's no reason why you shouldnt use either the left or right urinal instead. That way if someone does come in for a piss it gives both of you a little privacy. Are guys who piss in the middle urinal trying to get more privacy? Like they don't want anyone to piss anywhere near them so they hope whoever comes in after them would rather just pee in the poop stall than bump elbows uncomfortably at the urinal line. If you piss in the middle urinal, please tell me more.
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Jun 1, 2016 19:39
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goddamn you are terrified about people seeing your dick in a public restroom. just go pee in a stall if you are that insecure.
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Jun 1, 2016 19:40
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i use this to assert cock dominance over other urinal users
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Jun 1, 2016 19:41
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When I unfurl my massive member, I need to lay it across the lip of two urinals in order to use the third one.
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Jun 1, 2016 19:42
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if u challenge me i will turn an piss in YOUR urinal
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Jun 1, 2016 19:42
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i piss in the toilet cause the urinals at work have a serious splashback problem.
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Jun 1, 2016 19:46
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Serious Frolicking posted:goddamn you are terrified about people seeing your dick in a public restroom. just go pee in a stall if you are that insecure. I don't like to pee in the stalls because everyone can tell I have a small wiener by the sound my piss stream makes when it hits the water.
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Jun 1, 2016 20:03
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Bloodfart McCoy posted:I don't like to pee in the stalls because everyone can tell I have a small wiener by the sound my piss stream makes when it hits the water. they can tell you have a small wiener by looking at you. everyone who bothers to notice you at all thinks "dang, that guy def. has a micropeen". at the urinals they are just confirming what they already know in their hearts to be true.
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Jun 1, 2016 20:05
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I just stand there and wait until the other guy is finished. I can't risk them seeing what is between my legs no one must know
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Jun 1, 2016 20:05
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Bloodfart McCoy posted:I don't like to pee in the stalls because everyone can tell I have a small wiener by the sound my piss stream makes when it hits the water. i have the opposite problem when i try to pee in the stall, my dongle dangles into the toilet water when i use urinal i simply rest it on top of the urinal cake, or use the little urinal that is on the ground
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Jun 1, 2016 20:05
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Agreed op but what about the horse trough urinals where everyone sees everyone's dicks if they want to or not Am I gay for going to football games?
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Jun 1, 2016 20:06
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Bloodfart McCoy posted:I don't like to pee in the stalls because everyone can tell I have a small wiener by the sound my piss stream makes when it hits the water. pinch your pee pee for a few seconds and then it'll sound huge
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Jun 1, 2016 20:06
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lmao if you dont peep on other dudes at the urinals and give a sage nod
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Jun 1, 2016 20:10
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It's almost as bad as freaks that'll go to the very end to pee. There can be 30 urinals and some people will go to the 30th one; they must have the smallest micro penises of all.
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Jun 1, 2016 20:10
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I piss on the floor, the dryers, the towels, the trashcan
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Jun 1, 2016 20:11
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i dont piss
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Jun 1, 2016 20:11
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op i am gay and i piss in the middle urinal so i can peek at the other guy's cocks 
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Jun 1, 2016 20:12
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what! its cold in here sheesh. never heard of shrinkage?
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Jun 1, 2016 20:14
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I like to piss next to people just because it makes them uncomfortable 
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Jun 1, 2016 20:15
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this pissing is making me thirsty
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Jun 1, 2016 20:15
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i piss wherever i please!
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Jun 1, 2016 20:15
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I'm going to start calling your mom "The Middle Urinal" now OP
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Jun 1, 2016 20:16
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Frequently Asked Questions About Time Travel made me scared to use the urinal, since i could walk out and see a bunch of dead bodies everywhere from the future due to my actions 
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Jun 1, 2016 20:17
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do a helicopter when you pee and then music will mysteriously start playing for your impromptu piss party
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Jun 1, 2016 20:17
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I hate urinals because i get embarrassed because i pull my pants all the way down to pee
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Jun 1, 2016 20:18
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I also sometimes just whip it out and piss on other people's legs, in the bathroom
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Jun 1, 2016 20:20
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op what if there's only two?
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Jun 1, 2016 20:23
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Then they are both middle urinals and you go piss in the sink like everyone else you pleb
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Jun 1, 2016 20:24
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eric posted:op what if there's only two? What if it's one of those bathrooms that only has a toilet and a urinal, but no dividers, and you can lock the door, but as you're about to lock the door, some other dude pushes past you and starts pissing in the toilet?
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Jun 1, 2016 20:24
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Even weirder than this, and it's only happened to me twice, usually very early in the morning, is when you are in a motorway/freeway service station bathroom and the place is empty as gently caress. You pick a random urinal out of 20, and mid piss, some dude comes in and picks a urinal right next to you, when there were 19 others to choose from. I don't know if this is some weird hookup thing, but I wish someone would tell me because it's like some weird serial murderer poo poo at 3am when you are so tired yet buzzing after 10 coffees.
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Jun 1, 2016 20:29
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k thanks dave barry
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Jun 1, 2016 20:29
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I pissed in a shoe once.
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Jun 1, 2016 20:30
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spud gets up in toronto still. it is very nice thing. probably from a crminal record.
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Jun 1, 2016 20:31
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If a building is designed with 3 urinals the architect was gay
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Jun 1, 2016 20:33
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Each of the bathrooms at work only have two urinals. Which one do I pick then?
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Jun 1, 2016 20:37
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Cthulu Carl posted:Each of the bathrooms at work only have two urinals. Which one do I pick then? it doesn't matter... the second guy that steps up is the one with the problem.
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Jun 1, 2016 20:42
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Cthulu Carl posted:Each of the bathrooms at work only have two urinals. Which one do I pick then? Cut off your dick and pretend to be a woman.
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Jun 1, 2016 20:42
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I am a middle urinal user. Everyone at my workplace knows that the middle one is mine but occasionally I will catch a new hire who hasn't learned yet taking a big long piss in there. If they take more than a few seconds I will confront them by telling them that the middle urinal belongs to me and that they need to plug it up and move over. They usually respond with a chuckle or two, as if it were a good-hearted joke between employees. I will respond with a hearty laugh and plant myself as close as I can do them, pull my pants and underwear down to my ankles, look them dead in the eye and start pissing right on next to them. Whenever I finish, the unfortunate urinal usurper usually just stands there, dumbfounded at what they see, and I tell him, "Well don't just stand there! You gotta shake it off!" This method has been fairly successful at deterring others from using the middle urinal. The only time it hasn't worked was with our latest employee, Chad. Now he just waits for me at the urinal during my lunch break with a little gleam in his eye. I'm not sure what he's trying to pull here but he seems a little too eager to share with me.
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Jun 1, 2016 20:57
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When I get drunk I like to use the urinal right next to the only other person and go, "I'm going to piss in the gently caress out of this urinal, HHNGGGAAAAAAAAAAGGH!!!!" and push as hard as I can until I poo poo my pants and loving die.
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Jun 1, 2016 21:00
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| # ? Apr 24, 2024 03:37 |
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I'm pretty sure a guy one urinal over was staring at my dick last night. Out of the corner of my eye it really looked like it, but I didn't want to blatantly turn and look at him because what if I was wrong and it was an optical illusion? Plus it was some old dude - maybe he was out of it or mentally handicapped or something, I don't know. Life, man, ya never know.
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Jun 1, 2016 21:02
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