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Inspector Gesicht
Oct 26, 2012

500 Zeus a body.




I'm looking towards the Longplays where Link saves the world wearing nothing but his briefs.

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Inspector Gesicht
Oct 26, 2012

500 Zeus a body.




Assassin's Creed IV is the best AC game, and the sole AC game I recommend if nothing else, because it doesn't weigh the whole gameplay on the same-old parkour, instead your pirate ship is a character in itself. You use it to free-roam and level it up to face off stronger foes. It may be a by-the-numbers sandbox game but it has a pleasant Carribean setting and by the time you unlock the diving levels halfway through the story the entire ocean is your oyster.

Money is actually useful for once because there's none of that Renovation nonsense before and after this title. Don't feel like hunting for crocodile skins to craft a bigger wallet? Just buy them from a shop. All the game systems are pretty straight-forward. Explore islands, take over forts, dig up treasure, assassinate dudes and sink enemy ships for money, buy upgrades, repeat.

The weakest parts of the game are when the modern-day meta-plot butts in ( I now loving hate French-Canadians) and there are too many tailing missions in the main campaign. There's also some online tomfoolery that gets in the way of 100% completion.

Inspector Gesicht
Oct 26, 2012

500 Zeus a body.




Rogue is good, but there's only a third as many naval missions, no novel sidequests like the Templar Hunts, half the collectibles don't reward you poo poo, and the renovations give you worthless money at the expense of valuable resources. I liked it better than the Ezio games, though. It also has the only storyline in the series that could stand to be longer. I respect it for being fresh take on reused assets, like Majora and New Vegas.

Ometeotl posted:

Nintendo's twitter showed off the box art



Female-Link option confirmed *sigh*

Inspector Gesicht fucked around with this message at 14:15 on Jun 18, 2016

Inspector Gesicht
Oct 26, 2012

500 Zeus a body.





Terrible.

Inspector Gesicht
Oct 26, 2012

500 Zeus a body.




This game is giving me Phantom Pain vibes, and while I don't think anything too bad will be left on the cutting-room floor, I wonder how the hell are they going to follow up after the open-world concept? Could this be like a sendoff game?

Inspector Gesicht
Oct 26, 2012

500 Zeus a body.




Zelda Boom.

Inspector Gesicht
Oct 26, 2012

500 Zeus a body.




I mastered Majora 3D twice, but I never could muster the effort to do the same to Ocarina 3D. Was it the fishing? Was it the big Poes? Was it the Gerudo Archery challenge? Or the race against Dampe?

Inspector Gesicht
Oct 26, 2012

500 Zeus a body.




Octoball Derby

Inspector Gesicht
Oct 26, 2012

500 Zeus a body.




I lament that I will never master A Link Between Worlds for reasons.

What are the better Zelda clones out there?

I really liked Okami back in the day in spite of the low difficulty, unskippable cutscenes, dreadful sidekick, and three Orochi fights. The game felt like an evolution of the Zelda formula: instead of one hub town there's multiple towns giving the world a sense of scope. You don't just have the one weapon, you can customise and switch it out or use it's alternate form. You kill the apparent final boss and the game just keeps going, and you travel to a whole new land. The plot doesn't rely on the same old Mcguffin Collectathon and even has legitimate twists, where every non-Majora Zelda game would just be predictable. Also you spend the entire game as a wolf that learns new tricks while Twilight Princess struggled to explain why the Wolf-form even belongs in the game.

Inspector Gesicht fucked around with this message at 20:34 on Jan 2, 2017

Inspector Gesicht
Oct 26, 2012

500 Zeus a body.




What would count as the least successful central-mechanic in the Zelda series? The Train? The Temple of the Ocean King? One of the instruments that use motion controls?
I hated how slow navigation could be in OOT3D since you needed to learn six separate songs to warp and you could only time-travel in the one spot. I effing hated how Minish Cap expected you to keep track of all the people you fused with without any in-game help.

Inspector Gesicht
Oct 26, 2012

500 Zeus a body.




What's to stop Link from binge-eating his hearts up in the pause menu every time he takes damage?

Inspector Gesicht
Oct 26, 2012

500 Zeus a body.




Majora's Mask does have a shitload of heart pieces, but the 3D version tracks every heart piece, stray fairy, and side-quest unlike the N64 version. If your fine with some archery challenges and dodgy platforming then MM is pretty easy to master. You can skip fishing entirely since there is no reward and it didn't exist in the original version either.

Inspector Gesicht
Oct 26, 2012

500 Zeus a body.




What could be worse than sailing the ocean for Animus Fragments?

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Inspector Gesicht
Oct 26, 2012

500 Zeus a body.




Screenrant is loving trash. They pushed an article spitballing about Black Panther 2 the moment it was announced Chadwick Boseman passed away.

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