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Tramadol Junkie
Aug 30, 2015

by zen death robot
Lipstick Apathy
A man has claimed he has been told to remove a pond in his back garden because it could pose a danger to burglars.

Kevin Sheehan said he was told by his housing association that if someone breaks into his garden they could fall in as it is hidden from view the other side of his fence.

The 62-year-old’s pond is home to 80 fish and is surrounded by concrete blocks to prevent his one-year-old daughter, Olivia, falling in.

He said he has been threatened with an eviction notice unless the pond is demolished within three weeks.

He said: ‘I was thinking of my daughter’s safety and was building it up another two blocks.

‘I had it at the old height for about 15 years and it’s never been a problem.

‘The reason they gave was if someone breaks into the back garden they can fall in the pond because there’s a six-foot fence all round and they can’t see it.

‘I said ‘well they shouldn’t be breaking in’.’

http://metro.co.uk/2016/05/25/man-told-to-remove-pond-because-its-dangerous-for-burglars-5905006/#ixzz4CCLTVFtJ



I don't want to live in this country anymore where criminals have health and safety rights for illegal occupations.

:smithicide:

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SLICK GOKU BABY
Jun 12, 2001

Hey Hey Let's Go! 喧嘩する
大切な物を protect my balls


Think of the criminals man, you can't booby trap your house like this.

RobattoJesus
Aug 13, 2002

You could tell from the title that this was Britain, not just because of the ridiculous legal poo poo, but because only British people build swamps at the bottom of the garden to feel at home.

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost
Stories like this always piss me off. Like when a burglar breaks into a house and cuts his hand on broken glass and successfully sues the owner. It's loving bullshit. Anyone who violates the sanctity of another person's home should consider their life forfeit to the owner's wishes.

Zorodius
Feb 11, 2007

EA GAMES' MASTERPIECE 'MADDEN 2018 G.O.A.T. EDITION' IS A GLORIOUS TRIUMPH OF ART AND TECHNOLOGY. IT BRINGS GAMEDAY RIGHT TO THE PLAYER AND WHOEVER SAYS OTHERWISE CAN, YOU GUESSED IT...
SUCK THE SHIT STRAIGHT OUT OF MY OWN ASSHOLE.

BUY IT.
it should be 100% legal to booby trap your house. It's your loving house.

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

Zorodius posted:

it should be 100% legal to booby trap your house. It's your loving house.

Professor Shark
May 22, 2012

You would have to be one dumb burglar to fall and drown in this thing:

Zorodius
Feb 11, 2007

EA GAMES' MASTERPIECE 'MADDEN 2018 G.O.A.T. EDITION' IS A GLORIOUS TRIUMPH OF ART AND TECHNOLOGY. IT BRINGS GAMEDAY RIGHT TO THE PLAYER AND WHOEVER SAYS OTHERWISE CAN, YOU GUESSED IT...
SUCK THE SHIT STRAIGHT OUT OF MY OWN ASSHOLE.

BUY IT.
A man who steps in a bear trap may sue.

A man who steps in a bear pit is never suing anything again.

Food for thought.

bitterandtwisted
Sep 4, 2006




man builds pond on property he doesn't own without permission, owner objects, resident make stdh rant about health and safety gone mad, OP posts month old click-bait article from garbage paper the Metro

Cthulu Carl
Apr 16, 2006

62 years old with a 1 year old daughter.

Maldoror
Oct 5, 2003

by R. Guyovich
Nap Ghost
gently caress all condo and housing associations

private property is private loving property

Professor Shark
May 22, 2012

bitterandtwisted posted:

man builds pond on property he doesn't own without permission, owner objects, resident make stdh rant about health and safety gone mad, OP posts month old click-bait article from garbage paper the Metro

Yeah I assumed that a Housing Association was a UK equivalent to Homeowners Associations, which would absolutely do this sort of thing.

1000 Sweaty Rikers
Oct 13, 2005

perhaps Trump could build ornamental garden ponds in front of his giant wall to increase effectiveness?

Time_pants
Jun 25, 2012

Now sauntering to the ring, please welcome the lackadaisical style of the man who is always doing something...

Cthulu Carl posted:

62 years old with a 1 year old daughter.

Seriously. Can we talk about this?

RobattoJesus
Aug 13, 2002

Time_pants posted:

Seriously. Can we talk about this?

In Britain anyone who lives past 60 is treated as a King for they have won the genetic lottery and women want to mate with them in the hopes that their offspring might also make it out of their late 30s without succumbing to some kind of genetic disorder.

Owlofcreamcheese
May 22, 2005
Probation
Can't post for 9 years!
Buglord
the fact he's being evicted means it's not his property and the property owner should be able to do what they want (kick him out)

bitterandtwisted
Sep 4, 2006




lol at op's rap sheet he's 100% voting leave tomorrow

Node
May 20, 2001

KICKED IN THE COOTER
:dings:
Taco Defender

Professor Shark posted:

You would have to be one dumb burglar to fall and drown in this thing:



The housing association must think house robbers are comically stupid like the two from Home Alone.

Tramadol Junkie
Aug 30, 2015

by zen death robot
Lipstick Apathy

bitterandtwisted posted:

lol at op's rap sheet he's 100% voting leave tomorrow

I already voted leave by post and I used a marker so those fuckers cant change my vote.

They have pencils in the voting booths, they think we stupid.

Bob James
Nov 15, 2005

by Lowtax
Ultra Carp
The threat of hamburglars is very real.

gimme the GOD DAMN candy
Jul 1, 2007
thats funny, because no one other than you wants you to stay in that country either. or any country, really. no one likes impoverished cripples.

Professor Shark
May 22, 2012

Tramadol Junkie posted:

I already voted leave by post and I used a marker so those fuckers cant change my vote.

They have pencils in the voting booths, they think we stupid.

They would either dump the votes and/or make new ones, lol if you think they would erase and then put in the answer they want

ziasquinn
Jan 1, 2006

Fallen Rib

Tramadol Junkie posted:

I already voted leave by post and I used a marker so those fuckers cant change my vote.

They have pencils in the voting booths, they think we stupid.

Yes they probably do

Zorodius
Feb 11, 2007

EA GAMES' MASTERPIECE 'MADDEN 2018 G.O.A.T. EDITION' IS A GLORIOUS TRIUMPH OF ART AND TECHNOLOGY. IT BRINGS GAMEDAY RIGHT TO THE PLAYER AND WHOEVER SAYS OTHERWISE CAN, YOU GUESSED IT...
SUCK THE SHIT STRAIGHT OUT OF MY OWN ASSHOLE.

BUY IT.

Professor Shark posted:

They would either dump the votes and/or make new ones, lol if you think they would erase and then put in the answer they want

or just make up a number

RobattoJesus
Aug 13, 2002

Zorodius posted:

or just make up a number

Wait, do they have the technology to do this!?!??! :tinfoil:

Wee Stubby Nublet
Nov 20, 2015

by Lowtax

Tramadol Junkie posted:

He said: ‘I was thinking of my daughter’s safety and was building it up another two blocks.

Maybe not in his day, but these days kids can climb blocks... easily. Silly old bugger should've at least had proper pool fencing around his burglar deathtrap fishpond.

Spandex Bonerlord
Sep 30, 2014

Cthulu Carl posted:

62 years old with a 1 year old daughter.

Granddaddad

numberoneposter
Feb 19, 2014

How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

get your fascist on

gently caress liberals and conservatives

its time to tell people whats up

CRIP EATIN BREAD
Jun 24, 2002

Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T



Soiled Meat

RobattoJesus posted:

You could tell from the title that this was Britain, not just because of the ridiculous legal poo poo, but because only British people build swamps at the bottom of the garden to feel at home.

Whybird
Aug 2, 2009

Phaiston have long avoided the tightly competetive defence sector, but the IRDA Act 2052 has given us the freedom we need to bring out something really special.

https://team-robostar.itch.io/robostar


Nap Ghost

Tramadol Junkie posted:

I already voted leave by post and I used a marker so those fuckers cant change my vote.

They have pencils in the voting booths, they think we stupid.

Follow this one crazy tip to prevent electoral fraud. The illuminati hate him!

www
Aug 4, 2010

its not his house, he rents. You cant rent a house and just decide to dig up the back garden for a loving pond.

Ivor Biggun
Apr 30, 2003

A big "Fuck You!" from the Keyhole nebula

Lipstick Apathy

Tramadol Junkie posted:

A man has claimed he has been told to remove a pond in his back garden because it could pose a danger to burglars.

Kevin Sheehan said he was told by his housing association that if someone breaks into his garden they could fall in as it is hidden from view the other side of his fence.

The 62-year-old’s pond is home to 80 fish and is surrounded by concrete blocks to prevent his one-year-old daughter, Olivia, falling in.

He said he has been threatened with an eviction notice unless the pond is demolished within three weeks.

He said: ‘I was thinking of my daughter’s safety and was building it up another two blocks.

‘I had it at the old height for about 15 years and it’s never been a problem.

‘The reason they gave was if someone breaks into the back garden they can fall in the pond because there’s a six-foot fence all round and they can’t see it.

‘I said ‘well they shouldn’t be breaking in’.’

http://metro.co.uk/2016/05/25/man-told-to-remove-pond-because-its-dangerous-for-burglars-5905006/#ixzz4CCLTVFtJ



I don't want to live in this country anymore where criminals have health and safety rights for illegal occupations.

:smithicide:

STDH.TXT

numberoneposter
Feb 19, 2014

How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

for sure its hilarious he was allowed to build a pond but now the strata or whatever are trying to get rid of this guys fish pond in backwards way claiming safety when they should just go right at the point

they should just have come out and said "NO FISH PONDS IN YOUR loving YARD" and be done with it instead of some dumb rear end excuse about burglars

Pvt.Scott
Feb 16, 2007

What God wants, God gets, God help us all

numberoneposter posted:

for sure its hilarious he was allowed to build a pond but now the strata or whatever are trying to get rid of this guys fish pond in backwards way claiming safety when they should just go right at the point

they should just have come out and said "NO FISH PONDS IN YOUR loving YARD" and be done with it instead of some dumb rear end excuse about burglars

They're probably taking this tack because the owners didn't have anything in the contract even vaguely related to the pond otherwise. If they add rules now, great, they can prevent future cases, but the pond has been there for 15 years which would make a great case for grandfathering it in.

Dravs
Mar 8, 2011

You've done well, kiddo.
The wording in the article seems to suggest the guy is actually running a business from his back garden by using the pond as some kind of viewing gallery?

In a house he is renting from a local housing association?

The probability of him being on benefits for disability and extremely racist is around 900%

Are we sure this isn't an article about the OP?

bitterandtwisted
Sep 4, 2006




Pvt.Scott posted:

They're probably taking this tack because the owners didn't have anything in the contract even vaguely related to the pond otherwise. If they add rules now, great, they can prevent future cases, but the pond has been there for 15 years which would make a great case for grandfathering it in.

I just signed a new lease that lets me keep cats or dogs but specifically says no pigs and I know there must be a reason that rule was added.

ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD
Jan 21, 2007

what happened to my taint oh no its been reaped

OXBALLS DOT COM
Sep 11, 2005

by FactsAreUseless
Young Orc

ScrotoTurboSperg posted:

what happened to my taint oh no its been reaped

RIP taint reaper

Rockman Reserve
Oct 2, 2007

"Carbons? Purge? What are you talking about?!"

my day was going an awful lot better when I thought tramadol junkie was dead

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Helical Nightmares
Apr 30, 2009

Zorodius posted:

A man who steps in a bear trap may sue.

A man who steps in a bear pit is never suing anything again.

Food for thought.

Coat the bear trap with blood thinners or poison.

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