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I adopted a cat year ago and this saturday is her birthday. I am going to buy a bird at the pet store and let it loose, so my cat can stalk and kill a live bird. She loves watching birds through windows and does that jaw clicking thing cats do but she inside only because Houston is full of some shady motherfuckers and terrible drivers. What birds taste the best to cats?
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Aug 12, 2016 00:01
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your cat secretly wants to be declawed as a birthday surprise
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Aug 12, 2016 00:01
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I think the point is the cat wants to chase and catch the bird. it's no fun if you just present the cat with a dead bird and go "tuck in, din din's on me!"
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Aug 12, 2016 00:02
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Geese
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Aug 12, 2016 00:02
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Sacrifice a toucan. Then when it's dead cook and serve it in it's own beak.
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Aug 12, 2016 00:05
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get the cat a falcon or something it desires honourable combat against a worthy foe
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Aug 12, 2016 00:06
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Put a sock over kitty's head for fun times!
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Aug 12, 2016 00:05
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Bring your cat to see Big Bird from sesame street (Clarence Spooney)
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Aug 12, 2016 00:05
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I hope the bird kills your cat instead.
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Aug 12, 2016 00:06
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a hole-y ghost posted:Geese That sounds like a sweet battle, I will throw em both in the garage. I used to work at restaurant with a wood burning grill and the mesquite wood would have scorpions in it sometime, the cooks would catch an american cockroach and make the cockroach fight the scropion. Only american cockroaches cuz those are the big nasty fuckers that can fly sometimes.
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Aug 12, 2016 00:07
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a hole-y ghost posted:Bring your cat to see Big Bird from sesame street (Clarence Spooney)
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Aug 12, 2016 00:06
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spud posted:I hope the bird kills your cat instead. gently caress you dude
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Aug 12, 2016 00:08
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spud posted:I hope the bird kills your cat instead. eat cocks in hell
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Aug 12, 2016 00:12
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birds is dumb kitties is good
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Aug 12, 2016 00:12
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ostrich
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Aug 12, 2016 00:13
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FB10nUpcMSw
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Aug 12, 2016 00:14
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jarofpiss posted:ostrich pretty sure those can kill me but maybe I am thinking of kangaroos or something
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Aug 12, 2016 00:14
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You adopted it you dont know when it was born so you can never celebrate its birthday
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Aug 12, 2016 00:16
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texaholic posted:pretty sure those can kill me but maybe I am thinking of kangaroos or something You are thinking of a cassowary
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Aug 12, 2016 00:16
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I hit a rabbit once on the freeway and it's poor little dead body got stuck in my grill and later I saw a stray cat pulling it out in my driveway so it got dinner and I got a new cat.
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Aug 12, 2016 00:26
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The best gift you could get it would be to put it down so it doesn't have to live with you any more 
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Aug 12, 2016 02:29
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that's quite a bold statement you've made there, nooner
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Aug 12, 2016 02:56
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criscodisco posted:I hit a rabbit once on the freeway and it's poor little dead body got stuck in my grill and later I saw a stray cat pulling it out in my driveway so it got dinner and I got a new cat. Man, that's like the start of a RomCom.
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Aug 12, 2016 03:34
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Have it kill a finch
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Aug 12, 2016 03:40
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They'll probably just become friends tbh
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Aug 12, 2016 03:55
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THE DOG HOUSE posted:They'll probably just become friends tbh There are no friends in nature, only predator and prey. It's survival of the fittest, just like in futures speculation.
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Aug 12, 2016 03:58
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No I saw a movie about a pug and a cat that fight bears together.
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Aug 12, 2016 04:01
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They are going to team up and plot your demise. Don't be fooled! Alternative answer, why don't you get some catnip and watch your cat roll loving face for like an hour. 
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Aug 12, 2016 04:02
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criscodisco posted:No I saw a movie about a pug and a cat that fight bears together. How many of those do you think they went thru while filming
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Aug 12, 2016 04:04
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cool let the winner fight ur grandma
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Aug 12, 2016 04:04
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My cat insists that I keep the door cracked in case he gets scared, then he brings live things inside to play with. Birds, mice, snakes he brings em back live
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Aug 12, 2016 04:06
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Champenema posted:My cat insists that I keep the door cracked in case he gets scared, then he brings live things inside to play with. Birds, mice, snakes he brings em back live There was this stray I used to feed and it would sometimes being me dead stuff then one day it brought me a live chipmunk and it dropped it at my feet and the poor thing ran up my pants leg like I was gonna save it but I freaked and did a panic dance and it flew off and the stray caught it and the chipmunk made terrible noises.
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Aug 12, 2016 04:10
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i'm not a fan of cats i'm a major fan of birds birds are extremely my poo poo
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Aug 12, 2016 04:11
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Cats bring you dead/alive things cause they think you're an idiot cat and they are trying to teach you how to hunt
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Aug 12, 2016 04:11
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I've always known my cats looked down on me.
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Aug 12, 2016 04:13
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Tuxedo Gin posted:i'm not a fan of cats i just found out that birds are the largest species of animals in the world by total number of birds. its literally about 3 birds for every chinaman.
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Aug 12, 2016 04:13
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Get your cat a dog Like a big mean Rottweiler so nobody will mess with them
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Aug 12, 2016 05:49
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Get like 50 bats instead and play weird sonar poo poo on your stereo so the bats freak out then your cat gets to kill 50 insane bats. Maybe like some dragonflies for the bats to freak out about too. Yeah now we're talking.
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Aug 12, 2016 06:17
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Hector Beerlioz posted:Cats bring you dead/alive things cause they think you're an idiot cat and they are trying to teach you how to hunt I think cats think we're giant magical cats who somehow get meat from a can They're like wait, what, haha how did, meat? again??
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Aug 12, 2016 07:30
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Aug 12, 2016 07:41
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