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Moridin920
Nov 15, 2007

by FactsAreUseless
tbh I think it's MORE strange that an olympic athlete with a gold medal needs to go to some seedy part of Rio to find a hooker; that dude was prolly robbed

:synpa:

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let it mellow
Jun 1, 2000

Dinosaur Gum
I think the whole story is hosed up and lol that a 32 year old Olympian was saying "I was afraid we'd get in trouble"

fuckin lol at this whole story

kindermord
Jun 5, 2003
ducks is chickens with swimmy toes

Nill posted:

So how hosed is it that a Brazilian judge can apparently just say "nah, you don't look sufficiently harrowed by these events you say happened, give up those passports."

imo this is the most concerning thing so far. brazil is clearly peeved about their totally peaceful and harmonious country getting a black eye from this story and their response is to round up the victims and put the heat on them for "making us look bad"

but lol i'm sure athletes getting robbed at gunpoint and then arrested and accused of lying about it will make tourists flock to their fair city

gimme the GOD DAMN candy
Jul 1, 2007

Moridin920 posted:

tbh I think it's MORE strange that an olympic athlete with a gold medal needs to go to some seedy part of Rio to find a hooker; that dude was prolly robbed

:synpa:

you don't understand the appeal of being in a strange city and getting some sleazy tail? how sheltered are you?

Moridin920
Nov 15, 2007

by FactsAreUseless

Serious Frolicking posted:

you don't understand the appeal of being in a strange city and getting some sleazy tail? how sheltered are you?

huh yeah let me, an Olympic athlete in my physical prime with a gold medal, go cruising around strange areas in Rio for the finest they have to offer instead of just sitting back and letting the numerous escort agencies bring me whatever I want direct to my room (in case I get tired of banging the nonstop sleazy tail that is all the other athletes present)







I understand that it's hard to relate to an Olympic gold medalist but come on guy

EngineerSean
Feb 9, 2004

by zen death robot
Does anyone believe the judge in this case? Can't tell but at this point I think it looks like business as usual in Rio.

WhyteRyce
Dec 30, 2001

EngineerSean posted:

Does anyone believe the judge in this case? Can't tell but at this point I think it looks like business as usual in Rio.

The beauty of the story is that you don't trust either party. It's like some low stakes version of a heist movie where the winner gets less embarrassed

gimme the GOD DAMN candy
Jul 1, 2007

Moridin920 posted:

huh yeah let me, an Olympic athlete in my physical prime with a gold medal, go cruising around strange areas in Rio for the finest they have to offer instead of just sitting back and letting the numerous escort agencies bring me whatever I want direct to my room (in case I get tired of banging the nonstop sleazy tail that is all the other athletes present)







I understand that it's hard to relate to an Olympic gold medalist but come on guy

i swear you are the dumbest dude alive. going out in a dangerous place for dangerous sex is good because it is wrong. by your logic no tourist in rio would ever frequent the nastiest whores available, especially not one that is all buzzed up on adrenaline and illegal doping.

Moridin920
Nov 15, 2007

by FactsAreUseless

Serious Frolicking posted:

i swear you are the dumbest dude alive. going out in a dangerous place for dangerous sex is good because it is wrong. by your logic no tourist in rio would ever frequent the nastiest whores available, especially not one that is all buzzed up on adrenaline and illegal doping.

you're right bro it's inconceivable that this rich white person was robbed in Rio


just makes no logical sense now that i think about it


(also lol you idiot illegal doping like they're taking speedball E pills or something)

EngineerSean
Feb 9, 2004

by zen death robot

WhyteRyce posted:

The beauty of the story is that you don't trust either party. It's like some low stakes version of a heist movie where the winner gets less embarrassed

You're right, I am definitely hoping that both parties suffer maximum embarassment.

Aesop Poprock
Oct 21, 2008


Grimey Drawer

jackyl posted:

I think the whole story is hosed up and lol that a 32 year old Olympian was saying "I was afraid we'd get in trouble"

fuckin lol at this whole story

Ryan Lochte is legit dumb to the point of possibly being mentally retarded, I have little to any doubt his mother prob still runs everything in his life for him and punishes him and stuff

Caeks
Dec 27, 2009

Why the gently caress would he make this up?

I genuinely want to know.

WhyteRyce
Dec 30, 2001

Runefaust posted:

Why the gently caress would he make this up?

I genuinely want to know.

Look at this noob who has never hooked up with a tranny and tried to hide it from his mom

let it mellow
Jun 1, 2000

Dinosaur Gum

WhyteRyce posted:

The beauty of the story is that you don't trust either party. It's like some low stakes version of a heist movie where the winner gets less embarrassed

this is correct

Caeks
Dec 27, 2009

WhyteRyce posted:

Look at this noob who has never hooked up with a tranny and tried to hide it from his mom

It's loving 2016 - isn't an Olympian hooking up with a tranny pretty much the norm? Why would anyone hide it?

extra stout
Feb 24, 2005

ISILDUR's ERR

Serious Frolicking posted:

i swear you are the dumbest dude alive. going out in a dangerous place for dangerous sex is good because it is wrong. by your logic no tourist in rio would ever frequent the nastiest whores available, especially not one that is all buzzed up on adrenaline and illegal doping.

i get way less sex than a gold medal olympic athlete and i'm passing up everything in rio from the food to the pussy

am i....boring?

let it mellow
Jun 1, 2000

Dinosaur Gum
lol they apparently pissed all over a gas station and broke its door down

old beast lunatic
Nov 3, 2004

by Hand Knit
Ryan Lochte owns

Flocons de Jambon
Apr 11, 2015
We all knew that having the Olympics in Rio meant a few athletes weren't coming home.

old beast lunatic
Nov 3, 2004

by Hand Knit
Jeah!

Prokhor Zakharov
Dec 31, 2008

This is me as I make another great post


Good luck with your depression!

Runefaust posted:

Why the gently caress would he make this up?

I genuinely want to know.

Dude is seriously as rock loving stupid as it is possible for a human being to be before his brain can no longer operate his heart and lungs. So who the hell knows I guess.

Lastgirl
Sep 7, 1997


Good Morning!
Sunday Morning!

Sir_Charles posted:

Ryan Lochte looks like Rutger Hauer from Blade Runner now



"Just call me.... Mr. Blade Runner"

Nefarious 2.0
Apr 22, 2008

Offense is overrated anyway.

man just own up to pissing all over a bathroom and busting up a door. reckless party boy is a way better reputation than scared lying racist gently caress boi

CharlestonJew
Jul 7, 2011

Illegal Hen
What if he was so mad and emotional about being robbed that he destroyed the bathroom

I've seen people wreck toilets over less

afeelgoodpoop
Oct 14, 2014

by FactsAreUseless
retard strength is a great passive to have.

OXBALLS DOT COM
Sep 11, 2005

by FactsAreUseless
Young Orc

Lastgirl posted:



"Just call me.... Mr. Blade Runner"

uh oh nobody let him own a gun

WhyteRyce
Dec 30, 2001

Lochte is basically my RPG character IRL. Minimize all the other skills and dump everything into strength, penalties be damned

pop fly to McGillicutty
Feb 2, 2004

A peckish little mouse!

Moridin920 posted:

tbh I think it's MORE strange that an olympic athlete with a gold medal needs to go to some seedy part of Rio to find a hooker; that dude was prolly robbed

:synpa:

I think it's more strange a white American thought they could commit crimes in a hell hole and get away with it.

pop fly to McGillicutty
Feb 2, 2004

A peckish little mouse!

WhyteRyce posted:

Lochte is basically my RPG character IRL. Minimize all the other skills and dump everything into strength, penalties be damned

Chyeah is my war cry

BigBallChunkyTime
Nov 25, 2011

Kyle Schwarber: World Series hero, Beefy Lad, better than you.

Illegal Hen

Gaunab posted:

Ryan lochte is a man at night and a man in the morning

And man enough to break down a door and pee on the floor, but apparently not man enough to face the consequences of his actions.

Oh, and man enough to run back home ASAP and hang his buddies out to dry.

What I'm saying is that Lochte is a piece of poo poo.

BigBallChunkyTime fucked around with this message at 19:49 on Aug 18, 2016

OXBALLS DOT COM
Sep 11, 2005

by FactsAreUseless
Young Orc

Zombie Boat posted:

I think it's more strange a white American thought they could commit crimes in a hell hole and get away with it.

uhh

WhyteRyce
Dec 30, 2001

Retail Slave posted:

And man enough to break down a door and pee on the floor, but apparently not man enough to face the consequences of his actions.tell his mommy what he did

paul_soccer10
Mar 28, 2016

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
can someone tell me the funny timestamps of that 6 minute interview video

pop fly to McGillicutty
Feb 2, 2004

A peckish little mouse!

In trump voice "sarcasm"

Gaunab
Feb 13, 2012
LUFTHANSA YOU FUCKING DICKWEASEL
uhh, have you guys thought that maybe the corrupt brazilian police are trying to make themselves look better by framing this american hero? have you?

Preoptopus
Aug 25, 2008

Три полоски,
три по три полоски
Swimmers are the biggest d bags out of any sport.

T.S. Smelliot
Apr 23, 2010

by FactsAreUseless
You can't stock the lochte

stump collector
May 28, 2007

paul_soccer10 posted:

can someone tell me the funny timestamps of that 6 minute interview video

none

Boon
Jun 21, 2005

by R. Guyovich
As someone who has travelled to nearly every continent and many, many countries... :lol: gently caress Ryan Lochte and that whole pack of idiots, but especially Lochte.

32 year old child.

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jamcadbury
Nov 12, 2004
South Side Mexican
We are all Ryan Lochte

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