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a new study bible!
Feb 2, 2009



BIG DICK NICK
A Philadelphia Legend
Fly Eagles Fly


8-Bit Scholar posted:

Oh, well, then he really ought to know better. What's with the Olympic swimmers being kind of pricks? Phelps too, just a tall drink of boring and angst.

I thought I'd read that he'd just turned 21, maybe it was in this thread.

Swimming is one of the top choice sports for entitled rich kids, so expecting them to be pricks should be standard.

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8-Bit Scholar
Jan 23, 2016

by FactsAreUseless

CANNIBAL GIRLS posted:

Swimming is one of the top choice sports for entitled rich kids, so expecting them to be pricks should be standard.

And y'know what, tennis is probably the other entitled rich kid sport and it's pretty true that rich kids are pricks and a half. I know some real sweet tennis players though. It's money that really ruins a kid. Well, money and pride.

gimme the GOD DAMN candy
Jul 1, 2007
plus, you know, swimmer physiques. yowza! having both money and a perfect body is enough to make anyone conceited.

Nefarious 2.0
Apr 22, 2008

Offense is overrated anyway.

lol the people wagging their fingers at a brazilian security guard for taking money from a guy who roughed up a gas station are the same ones who said darren wilson was justified in executing michael brown because he roughed up a gas station

8-Bit Scholar
Jan 23, 2016

by FactsAreUseless

Nefarious 2.0 posted:

lol the people wagging their fingers at a brazilian security guard for taking money from a guy who roughed up a gas station are the same ones who said darren wilson was justified in executing michael brown because he roughed up a gas station

get a load of this guy

WhyteRyce
Dec 30, 2001

8-Bit Scholar posted:

Oh, well, then he really ought to know better. What's with the Olympic swimmers being kind of pricks? Phelps too, just a tall drink of boring and angst.

I thought I'd read that he'd just turned 21, maybe it was in this thread.

No Lochte's story was that he was afraid of telling anyone he was out drinking but then realized he was over 21 by 11 years and he figured he wouldn't get into trouble for that.

I mean it's a really weak defense but considering Mr. "I Stupefied Some Local Morning Talk Show Hosts" was coming up with his story on the fly it makes sense

WhyteRyce fucked around with this message at 06:09 on Aug 19, 2016

crackton
May 9, 2009
Following this story from the beginning, it just seemed so confusing. I couldn't think of what his motivation would be to make up a story about being robbed, but more so the part where he said he supposedly refused to follow directions from the "fake cop" that robbed the team, that part just seemed like something he remembered from a movie or something. We all know how that poo poo would've really ended up if it actually went down like that.

It made even less sense when the team members supposedly confessed to just having vandalized a bathroom. Why, why the gently caress would anyone make up a story about being robbed at gun point by the police when all they had to do was shut the gently caress up and take some xanax back at the hotel?

Then I saw this and realized its a miracle that he doesn't lose his toothbrush up his rear end every morning while trying to brush his teeth.

https://youtu.be/6dlyCTswYH0

Give the guy a break, he's clearly a handicap that ceases to function outside of a swimming pool. gently caress me, mommy must've had a few gin and tonics while pregnant with this one.

Metanaut
Oct 9, 2006

Honey it's tight like that.
College Slice

WhyteRyce posted:

No Lochte's story was that he was afraid of telling anyone he was out drinking but then realized he was over 21 by 11 years and he figured he wouldn't get into trouble for that.

Most of the countries have very strict rules about drinking/partying during the games. Some athletes have been sent home because they went out one night before they even got the chance to compete.

Nill
Aug 24, 2003

^^^^ Yeah.

A 33 year old adult was sent home before getting to compete just last week because of stupid drinking rules some delegations have so it's not completely outlandish that he had a moment of dread before realizing he isn't from a nation of fun-hating ninnies like the Dutch. :patriot:

Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
Fun Shoe
is this the thread where i post videos of brutal mob violence/torture/murder of people in brazil by fellow citizens?

speaking of murder in brazil check out this amazing video:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iVvRWU1RTsk

gimme the GOD DAMN candy
Jul 1, 2007
yeah, i must reluctantly admit that lying about the drinking thing makes more sense than trying to cover up his adventures with transexual prostitutes to his mother. the athletes must have talked about what happened to the dutch guy a lot and lochte is mildly retarded so he probably thought the same could happen to him even though he was done competing.

Filthy Hans
Jun 27, 2008

by Fluffdaddy

(and can't post for 11 years!)

Serious Frolicking posted:

yeah, i must reluctantly admit that lying about the drinking thing makes more sense than trying to cover up his adventures with transexual prostitutes to his mother. the athletes must have talked about what happened to the dutch guy a lot and lochte is mildly retarded so he probably thought the same could happen to him even though he was done competing.

I prefer the theory from earlier in the thread that suggests he was broke after paying off the security guy and was calling mommy for more money and things got out of hand when she asked where did his allowance for the week go

a new study bible!
Feb 2, 2009



BIG DICK NICK
A Philadelphia Legend
Fly Eagles Fly


its probably the prostitutes thing

Rakosi
May 5, 2008

D&D: HASBARA SQUAD
NO-QUARTERMASTER


From the river (of Palestinian blood) to the sea (of Palestinian tears)
Also some people just make up poo poo just to have something to say

WhyteRyce
Dec 30, 2001

Metanaut posted:

Most of the countries have very strict rules about drinking/partying during the games. Some athletes have been sent home because they went out one night before they even got the chance to compete.

His event is over, he was apparently coming home anyway in a day or two, and his Olympic career is over anyway. And the 21 concern was explicitly stated, not speculated. Dumb story by dumb person.

WhyteRyce fucked around with this message at 14:21 on Aug 19, 2016

Nill
Aug 24, 2003

Well, the two guys pulled off the plane were released last night after the USOC issued a bribepology and the one who didn't even try to skip town has been offered a deal to "donate" ~$11,000 to some unnamed "Institute" to get his passport back.

Yep Rio, this is exactly how you convince the world that what happened at the gas station wasn't a shakedown. :thumbsup:

8-Bit Scholar
Jan 23, 2016

by FactsAreUseless

Nill posted:

Yep Rio, this is exactly how you convince the world that what happened at the gas station wasn't a shakedown. :thumbsup:

I mean, seriously, does the video actually show them breaking the door? The whole thing seems really blown out of proportion.

WhyteRyce
Dec 30, 2001

11k to the BumBum institute. Worth every penny

Elias_Maluco
Aug 23, 2007
I need to sleep
So, lets suppose a russian citizen went to the USA, got drunk, trashed some store and then lied to the police that he was attacked

Im supposed to believe he would get away without being arrested, or even paying some kind of fine (or making a deal to avoid being persecuted)?

But yeah, Brazil is 3rd world country, they booed that french guy, who those monkeys think they are to want to enforce their "laws " on american citizens

8-Bit Scholar
Jan 23, 2016

by FactsAreUseless

Elias_Maluco posted:

So, lets suppose a russian citizen went to the USA, got drunk, trashed some store and then lied to the police that he was attacked

But he didn't do that, he got drunk, maybe messed up a storefront, paid for the damages, and left. Later, for some stupid reason, he made up a story about being robbed for some media junket or maybe he just told his mom that and she went on to make a big media poo poo show about it.

EDIT: Why is it that on Facebook it's always the most disgustingly obese people who seem to have very righteous opinions about athletes

Why are sports fans so fat and gross

8-Bit Scholar fucked around with this message at 14:37 on Aug 19, 2016

Nonsense
Jan 26, 2007

maybe criminals shouldn't do crime

Nill
Aug 24, 2003

Elias_Maluco posted:

So, lets suppose a russian citizen went to the USA, got drunk, trashed some store and then lied to the police that he was attacked

Im supposed to believe he would get away without being arrested, or even paying some kind of fine (or making a deal to avoid being persecuted)?

But yeah, Brazil is 3rd world country, they booed that french guy, who those monkeys think they are to want to enforce their "laws " on american citizens
If Russian Guy was already back in Russia so the US extorted three of his friends instead, then yeah, that'd look sketchy as gently caress.

steinrokkan
Apr 2, 2011



Soiled Meat

Elias_Maluco posted:

So, lets suppose a russian citizen went to the USA, got drunk, trashed some store and then lied to the police that he was attacked

Im supposed to believe he would get away without being arrested, or even paying some kind of fine (or making a deal to avoid being persecuted)?

But yeah, Brazil is 3rd world country, they booed that french guy, who those monkeys think they are to want to enforce their "laws " on american citizens


Did anybody actually file a frivolous police report ? I dont think so, and without that i dont see how they committed any crime

also im sorry you were born in brazil, you have my goondolences

turbomoose
Nov 29, 2008
Playing the banjo can be a relaxing activity and create lifelong friendships!
\
:backtowork:
Why are we blaming swimmers for peeing all over a gas station. They usually just pee in the pool so their aim isn't that great on dry land.

Elias_Maluco
Aug 23, 2007
I need to sleep

steinrokkan posted:

Did anybody actually file a frivolous police report ? I dont think so, and without that i dont see how they committed any crime

also im sorry you were born in brazil, you have my goondolences

After his story got to the headlines, the police went after him (and the other swimmers) for testimony. And than they flat out lied to cops too. That's a crime here, probably at the US too

Nill posted:

If Russian Guy was already back in Russia so the US extorted three of his friends instead, then yeah, that'd look sketchy as gently caress.

The other guys were also involved, Lochte didnt do it alone

And yes, Brazil is awful, the olympics were held in shameful conditions, RJ is a total hellhole. But is amazing that you guys cant admit that your hero was a total rear end in a top hat and an idiot is this case, and Brazilian authorities for once did they job

ROFL Octopus
Jun 20, 2014

LET ME EXPLAIN

Nonsense posted:

maybe criminals shouldn't do crime

Well committing crimes is in their job description

Nill
Aug 24, 2003

Elias_Maluco posted:

The other guys were also involved, Lochte didnt do it alone

Did they take turns holding his dick while he pissed? Was that part of the two minutes of missing surveillance video? :ohdear:

Preoptopus
Aug 25, 2008

Три полоски,
три по три полоски

Elias_Maluco posted:

So, lets suppose a russian citizen went to the USA, got drunk, trashed some store and then lied to the police that he was attacked

Im supposed to believe he would get away without being arrested, or even paying some kind of fine (or making a deal to avoid being persecuted)?

But yeah, Brazil is 3rd world country, they booed that french guy, who those monkeys think they are to want to enforce their "laws " on american citizens

Russian citizen was busy shooting some dude actually tryna rob him

Elias_Maluco
Aug 23, 2007
I need to sleep

Nill posted:

Did they take turns holding his dick while he pissed? Was that part of the two minutes of missing surveillance video? :ohdear:

They lied to the police to corroborate his story. Come on, is not so hard to understand

FormerPoster
Aug 5, 2004

Hair Elf

Nill posted:

Did they take turns holding his dick while he pissed? Was that part of the two minutes of missing surveillance video? :ohdear:

That's actually the entire two minutes because he spent a full 120 seconds releasing a single unbroken stream of piss.

Nill
Aug 24, 2003

Naerasa posted:

That's actually the entire two minutes because he spent a full 120 seconds releasing a single unbroken stream of piss.
Even knowing they have Olympic medals in watersports that's still impressive.

Yaldabaoth
Oct 9, 2012

by Azathoth

Elias_Maluco posted:

So, lets suppose a russian citizen went to the USA, got drunk, trashed some store and then lied to the police that he was attacked

Im supposed to believe he would get away without being arrested, or even paying some kind of fine (or making a deal to avoid being persecuted)?

americans are god's chosen people while russians are godless communists, you cant compare the two

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ihop
Jul 23, 2001
King of the Mexicans
Crazy that some petty vandalism and a little lying was by far the most heinous crime committed in Rio that night, possibly in the entire month.

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