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The Something Awful Forums > Archives > General Bullshit > What the fuck is going on with porn?

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

stepmom porn is good, op

# ¿ Aug 29, 2016 15:12

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# ¿ Apr 28, 2024 13:27

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

voting 1 because jfc

# ¿ Aug 29, 2016 15:13

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

big fan of the GAKGAKGAKGAKGAKGAKGAKing during a beej as well as long viscous ropes of mucus and bile and vom stretching from my dicktip to her facecunt when I pull out for a few seconds and allow her to gasp for air before going right back to forceful GAKGAKGAKGAKGAKGAKGAKing, bonus points for mascara running down her face because her eyes won't stop tearing because she's being forcefully gagged and choked

This is def cool and attractive and sexy and VERY normal

# ¿ Aug 29, 2016 15:27

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

vyst posted:

lol if you don't enjoy incest porn

Taboo 2 is my fav movie porn or otherwise

# ¿ Aug 29, 2016 15:44

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

it's like you go to redtube every day,no biggie, just ONCe you check out the shemale category because it's cool to have a dick and prob cool to have tits too and who never is curious about mixing up two good things? and now boom! every time you go there it's all shemale this and shemale that every ad and "suggested video" is like "CHECK OUT THE HUGE COCK ON THIS LADY! Do YOU want to be hosed by a tranny? HORNY SHEMALES GET DICKED DOWN CLICK HERE" even lil cartoons of chicks strokin their big donger

# ¿ Aug 29, 2016 23:37

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

Lucky Guy posted:

I want to make a porno where the guys are completely cropped out with green screening except for their dongs. just a chick and 7 floating disembodied boners, probably in outer space

i swear I saw something like this, it was called "the man who wasn't there" I think and it was this cleverly poo poo/cropped thing where you'd only ever see the dilz, never the man attached, and times when you absolutely should have been able to see some part of the man there was nuttin' at all, just a meg foster lookin broad enjoying a disembodied dilz

Six more floaterdicks would have been way cooler too, and space. I like that super white airy clean n' fresh lookin sets they all use now but space would be muuuuhch cooler

# ¿ Aug 30, 2016 15:30

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

The Dennis System posted:

Also, incest porn has been around for a long time. I remember that guy on Love Line talking about an incest porn called Taboo 2 like 20 years ago.

Cocksmith posted:

NOT his sister

lmao that theme song

https://youtu.be/z_9peBUo8VM

# ¿ Aug 30, 2016 15:34

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

drat taboo 2 is like forty five years old jfc it shall soon pass into myth and legend

Now we just get lovely pov "teachin my (step)sister how to give beejs" things and not fuckin incest art like taboo 2

# ¿ Aug 30, 2016 15:37

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

"mom is feeling distant from dad so her masseuse brings mom to an orgy so mom decides to bang her son who decides to bang his sister who decides to bang her dad who decides he loves mom again and family is saved also Ron Jeremy is there" is something that could never happen on this lovely internet today

# ¿ Aug 30, 2016 15:39

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

Taboo 2 is problematic af now that I think about it

# ¿ Aug 30, 2016 15:42

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

KakerMix posted:

*bass slap*

Int. MONK'S

GEORGE: "Have you seen this site? Stepbrotherlylove.com? It's the worst!"
JERRY: "Can we not do this right now? I told you, incest porn is not really part of my wheelhouse, George..."
GEORGE: "What the hell is a wheelhouse? It sounds nautical. What does sailing have to do with incest, Jerry? What does sailing have to do with anything?!"
JERRY: "Anyway, you were saying...?"
GEORGE: "This site, Jerry, it's just a bunch of videos of the same guy filming his 'stepsister'. Different girl every video. Same guy, different girl, every video. This guy has a thousand step-sisters! And he always says the same awful lines. 'Oh, I have a date this weekend but I'm afraid she won't like me, can I practice on you?' Like any step-sister is gonna go for that! Then before you know it, he's whippin' out this huge uncircumcised penis-"
JERRY: "Please, can we not do the circumcision thing again?"
GEORGE: "Oh, that's not even the half of it, Jerry! He whips out this firehose and says 'You don't think my girlfriend is gonna laugh at it, do you?' Smug little jerk. He knows he's big! He's just rubbing our faces in it!"
JERRY: "And his sister's, apparently."
GEORGE: "Step-sister, Jerry! STEP! Then he does the same five moves, missionary, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, doggy, moneyshot. No variety. A thousand different step-sisters, same five moves every video. It's obscene."
JERRY: "Well, it's pornography, George. Incest pornography. It's supposed to be obscene!"
GEORGE: "Dammit, Jerry, step isn't incest! It's no more taboo than teachers or cougars or milves!"
JERRY: "You mean milfs?"
GEORGE: "No, Jerry, I mean milves! Unless you've seen a pack of wolfs running around lately?"
JERRY: "OK, OK, milves. So you're saying step isn't taboo."
GEORGE: "Not at all! It's vanilla! And THAT'S what makes it obscene! When we were growing up, incest was a real taboo. A sister would sneak into her parents' room while they were asleep and she'd fellate her dad, who was circumcised, by the way, and pray mom didn't wake up. Or dad would have another late night at the office, so mom would wake up Junior and he'd dive right into that bushy muff! None of this step nonsense!"

Enter KRAMER.

JERRY: "I had no idea this was so important to you, George."
GEORGE: "Someone's gotta stand up against the step! Incest used to mean something in this country, Jerry."
KRAMER: "Just one more area where the Japanese are giving us a spanking! You wouldn't believe what they've accomplished, Jerry! Inter-generational bukkake! Oooh, mama! It's taking those islands by storm!"
JERRY: "Inter-what??"
GEORGE: "You hear that, Jerry?! JAPAN! It's Pearl Harbor all over again, Jerry!"

# ¿ Aug 30, 2016 16:23

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

WampaLord posted:

Yea, but on the other hand, we couldn't have had Pirates XXX back in the day without the ability to create cheap CGI.

wow excellent point, pirates and pirates 2: stagnettis revenge are unironically great

Evan stone is, and I hate using this overused meaningless phrase, a national treasure

# ¿ Aug 30, 2016 16:55

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

Moridin920 posted:

you know im starting to think you guys are just really loving bad at searching or something bc honestly it's not that hard to find either of those 2 things at all

either that or you all like the incest stuff secretly

who even has to search? out of the 20 or 30 vids on the first page of w/e porn site you use, there's plenty of "hot teen creampied" or "milf teaches paperboy how to gently caress".

Unless you're me, and every suggested video and ad and pop up is all CHICKS W/ DICKS!!!! because you got curious once

# ¿ Aug 30, 2016 17:00

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

I was gonna say "I just heard somewhere that as weird as it sounds, people overwhelmingly prefer seeing a close up of the guys puckered bumhole as he furiously nails some junkie to a mattress" but now that I think about it the "somewhere" was almost certainly this thread

# ¿ Aug 30, 2016 21:45

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

Moridin920 posted:

how come she's gotta be a junkie

to truly appreciate heaven u gotta live thru hell

# ¿ Aug 30, 2016 22:08

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

do they still do the "girl blowing a two foot long dildo while the camera guy makes cumsounds and pretends it's his dick and then finally they hose the girl down with a gallon of tzatsiki sauce"? that was good imo and should have evolved further until the dildo was so enormous the girls had to unhook their jaws like snakes just to get the tip in their mouth and then they get waterboarded with a bathtubs worth of yoghurt

# ¿ Aug 31, 2016 03:37

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

I remember some awesome horrors of porn thread back in the day about this terrifying lady named like kimberly or kelly, she would make these super weird choo-choo train sounds when she was sexing and she said the strangest poo poo, like it was a weird attempt at dirty talk but her voice/cadence was super bizarre like a child robot and she'd say poo poo like "yes sir there's nothing like two fat cocks to satisfy my stupid whore rear end in a top hat, please punish my oval office now WHOOOOOOOO WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" it was really funny but also scary

is this ringing any bells because every now and then I remember this crazy poo poo but googling "crazy eyed porn lady yelling chooooo chooooooo and talking like a little girl fuckdroid requesting nuts in her prolapsed rear end in a top hat" never turns up the right results

# ¿ Sep 2, 2016 14:55

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

she had eyes like that crazy bakery lady from that reality show with the angry British chef and she was always puking on dicks and insulting herself

Ppl say porn is art and usually it's like "yeah sure :jerkbag:

:jerkbag:

" but this really was art, scary starin-into-the-abyss art

# ¿ Sep 2, 2016 14:58

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

hemophilia posted:

joi is number 8... lmao

hmm never heard of it

lmfao

# ¿ Sep 2, 2016 19:19

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

lol yeah watching cum ooze out of a girls poose is fuckin gay. Watching the dick plunge in and out of the poose is good, esp if you can see dudes beanhole, but once he jisms it's gay af and you're a queer if you keep watchin after that

# ¿ Sep 2, 2016 19:31

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

hemophilia posted:

literally lol if you don't want to breed

# ¿ Sep 2, 2016 19:32

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

Jeepers I have no idea the jo instruction thing existed let alone was popular, this is amazing

# ¿ Sep 2, 2016 19:33

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

likin the hashtag, bout time we got some new visitors to this dead gay forum

# ¿ Sep 2, 2016 19:38

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

opus111 posted:

ah, i didn't write in a detail - I mean gangbang creampies.

Aaaaahhh yeah world of difference, that. I def don't wanna be dude #6 who slides his lil weiner into five other dudes worth of sperms

# ¿ Sep 2, 2016 19:41

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

hemophilia posted:

those boobs are nws man

No nipples, safe for Instagram or fb safe enough for work you prude

# ¿ Sep 2, 2016 19:42

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

hemophilia posted:

there are nipples though

You can see scarring around the alveoli from her tatty enhancement but that's it :colbert:

:colbert:

# ¿ Sep 2, 2016 19:52

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

what's the verdict on pissplay? is it finally ok for me to talk about it in public or is it still "taboo"

# ¿ Sep 3, 2016 01:12

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

Samuel L. ACKSYN posted:

i know what you are talking about but i dont want to post that i know because then everyone will be like lol trap spring and it just wont go wells

hahaha thx you this was helpful

I was able to find a video where she says "I love christ, thank you for blessing me with two cocks" while two dudes rub their peeners together inside her butt

# ¿ Sep 5, 2016 16:52

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

a happy snowman posted:

Read the first page of this

http://susannahbreslin.net/they-shoot-stars/

lol

# ¿ Sep 5, 2016 19:50

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

beep by grandpa posted:

I still like softcore, OP

same, unironically

# ¿ Sep 5, 2016 20:19

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

when theres no more room in porn the dead will gently caress on earth

# ¿ Sep 5, 2016 20:39

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

RestingB1tchFace posted:

Chicks with dicks is all the rage.

i think so as well

there's no denying it, dicks are COOL. they have a neat shape, the head is cool like a cobras head I mean not exactly but it calls a cobras head to mind if you're imaginative, not to start a derail but cut or uncut still super interesting, cut is more aesthetically pleasing afaik but uncut has that gruesome cronenberg factor that can't be beat like it's a monster with a too-big costanza head escaping from its own lil flesh sweater, plus BALLS

take a nice pretty lady with shiny hair and makeup that's just right and a tasteful butterfly tattoo on her ankle and a swell busom and curvy hips and between her silky soft thighs is a big fuckin dick lookin all interesting, sometimes they look like a lil dead limb I guess their femininity kills it off like an appendix, but sometimes it's a lively rip-roaring lil son of a gun just poppin up and pokin around and you think "mother of god it's bigger than mine!" but you don't feel inadequate because she's a tender, gentle soul, you can tell by her name (it's lorraine) and she makes you feel like it's ok that you don't know why you even go to work everyday, how you wake up in the middle of the night and you genuinely don't know who you are or why you're here, and that look in your eye, that craven desperation to end it all, it just vanishes when lorraine gets a hard on and pokes at your enormous gut with it leaving lil moist spots of glistening precum on your thick thatch of belly hairs, and you both laugh at such a simple pleasure

Yes I agree pally, chicks with dicks are the future, because there is no future mfers the future is NOW

# ¿ Sep 7, 2016 01:24

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

which cherokee are we talking about?

there's white lady cherokee who had a cool dumper and the loveline little girl voice

also there's woman of color cherokee d'rear end who i suspect made up her last name. it's porn, that's allowed, I just wish they'd be up front about it. She twerks on dicks. It's cool.

# ¿ Sep 12, 2016 16:46

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

8-Bit Scholar posted:

Y'know I thought it was bad enough that American porn has a lot of girls having their faces violently hosed. Like, gagging and choking on a dick isn't an arousing sight. Is it?

just lol

# ¿ Sep 15, 2016 23:03

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

I wanna gently caress a sister

Not mine obv

But someone's.....

# ¿ Sep 15, 2016 23:04

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

porn comments are the best :allears:

:allears:

# ¿ Sep 16, 2016 15:16

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

GBS v.69: I Want To Squirt Yeast Inside That Beast

# ¿ Sep 16, 2016 15:17

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

milves are typically ( in my imagination at least) like the mother of one of your contemporaries and not just a mother, full stop. Like poo poo, a 16 year old girl could be a mother. but she presumably without the interference of bad bad scientists could not be mother to your 20 y/o pal

# ¿ Sep 16, 2016 21:34

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

Germstore posted:

But the MILFs are my contemporaries but I still consider them MILFs.

you got old son

life changes in a daily basis

i have a headache juss thinkin bout it

you went from finding your contemporaries moms to be milves because they were like 40 and hot and you were a lil beansprout

Now the milves are your 40 y/o mama friends because they're 40s and hot, but you are a long donger with moons behind you

Time is completely and totally hosed

It's why I am so frequently thinkin about offin meself

# ¿ Sep 17, 2016 00:25

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# ¿ Apr 28, 2024 13:27

Gatekeeper: Aug 3, 2003; He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

loving is def more trouble than it's worth

Krishna gave us a dick that fits.perfectly in one hand And another hand to pleasure the butthole

Just lol if you gently caress

# ¿ Sep 17, 2016 01:02

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > General Bullshit > What the fuck is going on with porn?

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