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MiracleWhale
Jun 30, 2015




can you imagine haha it'd be all like, parking? fuhgeddaboudit!

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Kuato
Feb 25, 2005

COMFY FLEECE SWEATERS ALT ACCOUNT

Buglord

This premise is a bit too outlandish for my tastes op

Moltke
May 13, 2009


Grimey Drawer

Not a very good setting for a diverse cast of interesting and funny characters, imo

naem
May 29, 2011



-Wears unfitted too tight jeans and faded solid color button down shirt untucked with "sneakers"
-frizzy permed hair
-never works out ever
-new super hot girlfriend every week

Stinky_Pete
Aug 15, 2015

:bernget:
Forever past
:bernget:
We live

Lipstick Apathy

George parks in concentric circles

angerbeet
Mar 23, 2004


the dlob days are over


These pretzels are satisfying the basic requirements for food that I, as a living being, require.

MiracleWhale
Jun 30, 2015




kramer: recycled chewing gum, jerry! think about it! we'll put wrigley's <spastic hand gesture> right outta business!!

jerry: i don't know where you come up with these harebrained ideas, kramer.

kramer: have you ever heard of... <whispers> mk ultra?

Tricky D
Mar 31, 2005



KRAMER: Come on, think about it Jerry! Jet fuel burns at fifteen hundred degrees fahrenheit. There's no way that's hot enough to melt steel beams!

JERRY: I don't know Kramer.

KRAMER: *interrupts with hand gesture* Ahhhhh!

Meanwhile at Monk's Diner.

GEORGE: You know what I heard? That the Bush family are in cahoots with the Saudi's.

ELAINE: Get out! *pushes George into a waitress*

LARRY: I told you George not to be bringing that crazy in here.

happyhippy
Feb 21, 2005

Playing games, watching movies, owning goons. 'sup


Pillbug

Kramer: JERRY! JERRY! I just saw something really strange. Like X-Files spooky.

Jerry: What. What was it?

Kramer: So I wandered into a coffee shop, called Central Perk.

Jerry: I'm stealing that.

Kramer: And there was six 30 something people sitting there, 3 guys 3 girls.

Jerry: So, three couples enjoying themselves.

Kramer: No Jerry, you don't understand. They were just one group, sitting there and complaining about everything.

Jerry: In New York? Get out of here!

Kramer: No, wait. One would say something, something normal and unfunny. And then it would happen.

Jerry: What?

Kramer: Laughter. The most forced laughter you ever heard in your life.

MiracleWhale
Jun 30, 2015




a laugh track is the audio equivalent of when a friend texts you something that isn't very funny and you respond "lol"

Secular Humanist
Mar 1, 2016

"Everyone who posts in this dogshit thread should become a cop cause it would be funny to watch the bodycam footage that pops up on youtube of them just fucking folding the second shit hits the fan in absolutely any regard."

IGNORE MY STUPID AND SHITTY POSTING


Kramer falls in love with Jerry's girlfriend, so he kills her and rapes her body and then slices her face off to wear over his own face, thus protecting his tribe from spirits.

pants in my pants
Aug 18, 2009

by Smythe


I need to be at my apartment in case she calls me! I can't go out NOW!!!!

Mao Zedong Thot
Oct 16, 2008



Nap Ghost

full circle ground floor

Stinky_Pete
Aug 15, 2015

:bernget:
Forever past
:bernget:
We live

Lipstick Apathy

a calzone place where you make your own calzone!

naem
May 29, 2011



Jerry, a famous and wildly successful comedian, spends every single waking moment breakfast lunch and dinner hanging out with:

-his bald chubby unpleasant childhood friend
-a weird gangly annoying unemployed guy who lives across the hall
-a woman he dated briefly who physically assaults him, but only her not any of the other women he dates and tosses aside
-a mailman. He not only knows his mailman, they socialize and interact and are somehow "enemies" despite coming from different social strata

Jerry spends his 7 (8? more?) figure income on meals at a grubby corner deli and lives in the same two room apt for a decade

MiracleWhale
Jun 30, 2015




jerry spends years finding trivial reasons to reject every woman he's every dated until it dawns on him: kramer is slipping pcp into his drinking water

givepatajob
Apr 8, 2003

One finds that this is the best of all possible worlds.


Dinosaur Gum

Jerry and George write a pilot for a show about nothing called "The Super Mario Bros Super Show"

veiled boner fuel
Oct 21, 2015


naem posted:

Jerry, a famous and wildly successful comedian, spends every single waking moment breakfast lunch and dinner hanging out with:

-his bald chubby unpleasant childhood friend
-a weird gangly annoying unemployed guy who lives across the hall
-a woman he dated briefly who physically assaults him, but only her not any of the other women he dates and tosses aside
-a mailman. He not only knows his mailman, they socialize and interact and are somehow "enemies" despite coming from different social strata

Jerry spends his 7 (8? more?) figure income on meals at a grubby corner deli and lives in the same two room apt for a decade

Jerry wasn't wildly successful nor rich on the show. Nor was he rich IRL when the show started, I suspect.

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

IN THE GRIM BARKNESS
OF THE FUTURE
THERE ARE ONLY DOGS


Clapping Larry

They bust ghosts.

mmmm
Jul 26, 2010

hey
you're one of them fancy lads, ain't ya?

Secular Humanist posted:

Kramer falls in love with Jerry's girlfriend, so he kills her and rapes her body and then slices her face off to wear over his own face, thus protecting his tribe from spirits.

yeah that's pretty much how I remember the 90s

Kurtofan
Feb 16, 2011


naem posted:

Jerry, a famous and wildly successful comedian, spends every single waking moment breakfast lunch and dinner hanging out with:

-his bald chubby unpleasant childhood friend
-a weird gangly annoying unemployed guy who lives across the hall
-a woman he dated briefly who physically assaults him, but only her not any of the other women he dates and tosses aside
-a mailman. He not only knows his mailman, they socialize and interact and are somehow "enemies" despite coming from different social strata

Jerry spends his 7 (8? more?) figure income on meals at a grubby corner deli and lives in the same two room apt for a decade

I know right, living the dream.

Kurtofan
Feb 16, 2011


also i've started watching seinfeld last month and i've come realize I am George Costanza

dads_work_files
May 14, 2008

Cowabunga!


I never watch sienfreld

Bert Roberge
Nov 28, 2003


There's no way middle America will tune in for that sort of poo poo.

DO IT TO IT
Mar 3, 2008

I know "mon" means man, but I don't think "Och" means anything.


Kurtofan posted:

also i've started watching seinfeld last month and i've come realize I am George Costanza

We are all George Costanza.

naem
May 29, 2011



DO IT TO IT posted:

We are all George Costanza.

Some of us are Kramer (minus the racism)

popewiles
Jan 8, 2006

Just chillin' in the sink

naem posted:

Some of us are Kramer (minus the racism)

Anyone who thinks they are a Kramer (minus the racism) is in fact a Double George.

Tricky D
Mar 31, 2005



naem posted:

Some of us are Kramer (minus the racism)

Plz don't conflate Kramer the character with Michael Richards the actor.

Tender Bender
Sep 17, 2004

I'm 22 years old and my opinions about Donkey Kong are sincere and unironic



DO IT TO IT posted:

We are all George Costanza.

If it's anybody, it's me.

Leon Einstein
Feb 6, 2012
I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.

FrankieGoes posted:

Jerry wasn't wildly successful nor rich on the show. Nor was he rich IRL when the show started, I suspect.

You're very wrong on both. Jerry was a very successful comedian before the show, and pulled in like 60k a week.

reallivedinosaur
Jun 13, 2012

Ogdober subrise! XDDD


Leon Einstein posted:

You're very wrong on both. Jerry was a very successful comedian before the show, and pulled in like 60k a week.

ya he was up at the top at a time when stand up comedy was super popular and comedy clubs were opening everywhere like starbuckses

there was such a market for stand up comedy in the 80s/90s we had guys like andrew dice clay and carrot top playing to packed houses every day and releasing smash hit concert tapes

poisonpill
Nov 8, 2009

The only way to get huge fast is to insult a passing witch and hope she curses you with Beast-strength.


A pizza place where you make your own pizza actually sounds exactly like the sort of stupid hip idea you'd hear about opening in LA next month, backed by some guy who's website got bought by Yahoo

FlimFlam Imam
Mar 1, 2007

Standing on a hill in my mountain of dreams

Levels Jerry, it's all levels.

reallivedinosaur
Jun 13, 2012

Ogdober subrise! XDDD


poisonpill posted:

A pizza place where you make your own pizza actually sounds exactly like the sort of stupid hip idea you'd hear about opening in LA next month, backed by some guy who's website got bought by Yahoo

ive been to plenty of those, it was all a rage to "choose your own toppings" for everything from burgers to pizza. like not just order it, but stand there and point and watch as the person spread the topping out

sometimes i just want a sammich and i dont got the time to walk the guy at subway through it step by step. just make it look like the picture and lemme alone

Roargasm
Oct 21, 2010

Hate to sound sleazy
But tease me
I don't want it if it's that easy


FrankieGoes posted:

Jerry wasn't wildly successful nor rich on the show. Nor was he rich IRL when the show started, I suspect.

the show is named after his real life persona dude

MiracleWhale
Jun 30, 2015




poisonpill posted:

A pizza place where you make your own pizza actually sounds exactly like the sort of stupid hip idea you'd hear about opening in LA next month, backed by some guy who's website got bought by Yahoo

a restaurant where you wear a onesie and eat cereal with a plastic spoon

spank my snatch
Jun 4, 2009



naem posted:

(minus the racism)

Speak for yourself

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015



MiracleWhale posted:

a restaurant where you wear a onesie and eat cereal with a plastic spoon

And there's just one big block of cheese eveyone can take a bite out of.

Bert Roberge
Nov 28, 2003


When is Michael Richards gonna get back into sitcoms?

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Foreskin Problems
Nov 4, 2012

It's doing fine, actually.

He's been on Curb a couple of times since the... unpleasantness.

He also did an episode for Seinfeld's Comedians in Cars thing where he wore a wig and dark glasses. I mean, he could've been doing a bit, but he seemed genuinely afraid to be seen in public.

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