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ArtIsResistance
May 19, 2007

QUEEN OF FRANCE, SAVIOR OF LOWTAX


try and figure out which pet is the worst one in this thread.

I'm thinking some kind of bird

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ass
Sep 22, 2011


Young Orc

its u

flerp
Feb 25, 2014


LITERALLY A BIRD
Sep 27, 2008

I knew you were trouble
when you flew in


ArtIsResistance posted:

try and figure out which pet is the worst one in this thread.

I'm thinking some kind of bird

Dreqqus
Feb 20, 2013

Yeah! Let's mash it up! Bigger, badder, better! Ahahahaha!


Any sort of monkey or ape. If you have a monkey or ape as a pet I assume you either love feces or hate having a face.

im_sorry
Jan 15, 2006

(9999)

Ultra Carp

I have several pet birds, and I have to agree that parrots are probably the worst pet.

If you *really* think you want a parrot, foster one before you commit for life - they're loud, messy, and they're often utter dicks. Especially the large ones... cockatoos and macaws are loving assholes.

To top it all off, they'll probably outlive you.

KomodoWagon
May 10, 2013



Dreqqus posted:

Any sort of monkey or ape. If you have a monkey or ape as a pet I assume you either love feces or hate having a face.

Yeah but that would only make sense since those people are shitheads

Mizuti
Jan 28, 2007

What a singularly inappropriate moment you've chosen to assert your pedantry.



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=raMSmk9ePWg

*the house phone rings*

"I WANT A DIVORCE I WANT A DIVORCE"

sneakyfrog
Mar 16, 2011




Fan of Britches

http://forums.somethingawful.com/sh...hreadid=3789603

this poor guy is gonna have his hands full, its a drat biped.

Tsaedje
May 11, 2007

*AUTISM INSTENSIFIES*



The answer is an Orca is the worst pet

Bert Roberge
Nov 28, 2003



Keeping a colony of fire ants might be up there.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lrnDOovsmfg

Ema Nymton
Apr 26, 2008

the place where I come from
is a small town


Buglord

Pet robots. Not because they're terrible, but because they're still not good enough.

Necoro, the robot cat, came out in the early 2000s. It was very expensive at the time. I had high hopes that future robo pets would be even better!



Now in 2016, these toy pets have gotten cheaper and more common, but they're not any better. Like FurReal Friends, Biscuit the Dog. It's still not a pet, and it still doesn't walk. I won't be satisfied with robot pets until they're intelligent enough to express pain and joy so well that their existence becomes a controversy over man's hubris and the rights of sentient robots.

BirdbrainedPhoenix
Mar 18, 2010


Ferrets are the worst pets. They're cute as hell, though.

Darkman Fanpage
Jul 4, 2012

ha ha






Mogwai. You see the trouble those guys cause?

Tofu Terry
Oct 4, 2015

by FactsAreUseless


Wasn't there a guy who posted his pet monkey in PI and like a week later it broke out and ate all his wifes antidepressants


Anyways the worst pet is definitely a house rabbit.

Mirthless
Mar 27, 2011


Tofu Terry posted:

Wasn't there a guy who posted his pet monkey in PI and like a week later it broke out and ate all his wifes antidepressants


Anyways the worst pet is definitely a house rabbit.

the monkey got into his girlfriend's purse and ate 30 ambien (unfortunately for the monkey it survived this and had to continue being somebody's neglected pet)

i bought him an avatar for his trouble

Tofu Terry
Oct 4, 2015

by FactsAreUseless


Knew my memory was a little off, but lmao. I hope the monkey's in a sanctuary by now

Cannon_Fodder
Jul 17, 2007

"Hey, where did Steve go?"
Design by Kamoc

Mirthless posted:

the monkey got into his girlfriend's purse and ate 30 ambien (unfortunately for the monkey it survived this and had to continue being somebody's neglected pet)

i bought him an avatar for his trouble

I want this to be true AND false.

El Gar
Apr 12, 2007

Hey Trophy...



it's sea monkeys

see u in the goldmine

Maully Millions
Aug 10, 2014

Inappropriate.



BirdbrainedPhoenix posted:

Ferrets are the worst pets. They're cute as hell, though.

Incorrect. Ferrets are the shittiest pets, but they are pretty awesome when they're not intentionally pooping in the corner while making eye contact.

Worst pets have got to be hedgehogs, but I may only be saying that because I can't get one (because ferrets).

KomodoWagon
May 10, 2013



I went to see a chimp rehab center in South Africa a while back and they told us about how one of the chimps had been kept by a super wealthy Dubai family who'd found it hilarious to shave her and dress her up in baby clothes and just generally treat her like a human baby. For ten loving years. poo poo was sad as hell.

Leviathan Song
Sep 8, 2010


Maully Millions posted:

Incorrect. Ferrets are the shittiest pets, but they are pretty awesome when they're not intentionally pooping in the corner while making eye contact.

Worst pets have got to be hedgehogs, but I may only be saying that because I can't get one (because ferrets).

Hedgehogs are awesome. They're incredibly easy to take care of, smart, friendly after a bit of socialization, and can live in a terrarium. The only downside is they're nocturnal so you have to be a bit of a night owl to enjoy them.

What about teacup pigs? Breeders claim they'll stay small for ever and then they grow to completely impractical size of a normal pig.

The Lord of Hats
Aug 22, 2010



Leviathan Song posted:

Hedgehogs are awesome. They're incredibly easy to take care of, smart, friendly after a bit of socialization, and can live in a terrarium. The only downside is they're nocturnal so you have to be a bit of a night owl to enjoy them.

What about teacup pigs? Breeders claim they'll stay small for ever and then they grow to completely impractical size of a normal pig.

Well, by pig standards they stay small forever.

Pigs get fuckin' big.

(Incidentally, credit to Paris Hilton for keeping her now-big pig and giving it the care it deserves)

The Lord of Hats fucked around with this message at Oct 6, 2016 around 16:45

Flaccid Trip
Apr 29, 2008



When I was a kid, we had a neighbor with a potbellied pig who would routinely escape and go root up yards around the neighborhood, then start screaming when the owners came to get him.

So, pigs unless you can keep them contained or just hate your neighbors,

peengers
Jun 6, 2003

toot toot

ferrets are the best pets when they aren't corner pooping or getting treated for insulinomas. rabbits are the worst pets.

porkswordonboard
Aug 27, 2007
You should get that looked at



I love dogs and work with them, but for me it's pugs, and improperly trained German Shepherds. Pugs are often desperately unhealthy, almost always wildly obese, and they're the toughest nail trims by far. It's like trying to wrestle with an angry squirming potato. Their personalities are ok and many are quite sweet, but they're all dumb as a bag of rocks and their constant struggle for breath unnerves me. No thanks.

GS are lovely dogs when trained but lately there's been a spate of young, first-time dog owners buying a puppy (often with already apparent health issues; ie knock-knees) and then just...not training them. Or they think one puppy class is enough, and never do any reinforcing. I've been working with THREE such couples at my job recently, and one bit the owner, a highschool-aged girl, in the hand so hard she bled. She was just like 'yeah he does that.' I'd say 80% of our highly reactive dogs are GS where I work.

I guess that's really way more about the owners then the dogs, but I decided a long time ago German Shepherds are at the bottom of the list (with pugs) as to dogs I'd ever consider owning. Good for you if you have one and care for it though! They are beautiful even if they're not for me.

Psychobabble!
Jun 22, 2010

Ask me about getting toned!


porkswordonboard posted:

I love dogs and work with them, but for me it's pugs, and improperly trained German Shepherds. Pugs are often desperately unhealthy, almost always wildly obese, and they're the toughest nail trims by far. It's like trying to wrestle with an angry squirming potato. Their personalities are ok and many are quite sweet, but they're all dumb as a bag of rocks and their constant struggle for breath unnerves me. No thanks.

GS are lovely dogs when trained but lately there's been a spate of young, first-time dog owners buying a puppy (often with already apparent health issues; ie knock-knees) and then just...not training them. Or they think one puppy class is enough, and never do any reinforcing. I've been working with THREE such couples at my job recently, and one bit the owner, a highschool-aged girl, in the hand so hard she bled. She was just like 'yeah he does that.' I'd say 80% of our highly reactive dogs are GS where I work.

I guess that's really way more about the owners then the dogs, but I decided a long time ago German Shepherds are at the bottom of the list (with pugs) as to dogs I'd ever consider owning. Good for you if you have one and care for it though! They are beautiful even if they're not for me.

I love GSD's a ton and grew up with GSD mixes but yeah they're not right for everyone or even most people unless they have the time and energy to give a poo poo about training and working them. Same with any high energy breed.

Agreed that ferrets are awful but hilarious, except when I owned 3 and my friend and I were irresponsible pet owners so they had the run of the house, and we found out one of them liked to burrow in the couch. I got a text saying "I FOUND A POOP GRAVEYARD. THERE IS POOP EVERYWHERE OH GOD"

porkswordonboard
Aug 27, 2007
You should get that looked at



^ That bit about the ferrets is HILARIOUS, good god. A Poop Graveyard sounds like a good username.

But yeah, GSDs seem to rarely be owned by someone who knows what they're doing. When they are, they're amazing. When they aren't, they're not only annoying as gently caress but also super dangerous. It just makes me so sad to see a dog that would blossom in another environment being crated 9 hours a day, taken for one 10-minute walk, and grossly overfed/under trained. It's not specific to GSDs (high energy breeds all have this issue to some degree) but where I live they seem to be the poster dog for this sort of behavior between owner and pet, and unfortunately it's colored my entire opinion of the breed. Not proud of that but it's also saved my rear end a couple times when I blatantly disregard the owners (he's fine! He's just *anxious*) to muzzle the dog for a nail trim because gently caress no, being bit in the face once was enough for me.

Cached Money
Apr 11, 2010

respect the game and the game will respect you back


Guinea pigs are pretty crappy pets, they are about as dumb as rabbits but squeak at all hours and are generally annoying as gently caress.

ArtIsResistance
May 19, 2007

QUEEN OF FRANCE, SAVIOR OF LOWTAX


Cached Money posted:

Guinea pigs are pretty crappy pets, they are about as dumb as rabbits but squeak at all hours and are generally annoying as gently caress.

good coincidence, someone at work today wouldn't shut up about their 4 guinea pigs therefore I accept your nomination for worst pet

Jenner
Jun 5, 2011
Lowtax banned me because he thought I was trolling by acting really stupid. I wasn't acting.


I honestly think horses are the worst pet. They're stupid, they're expensive, they are prone to sickness and injury, they get spooked at everything and anything and they are a lot of work and effort. Even the hardier breeds are still quite fragile. Horses are just the worst.

Psychobabble!
Jun 22, 2010

Ask me about getting toned!


porkswordonboard posted:

^ That bit about the ferrets is HILARIOUS, good god. A Poop Graveyard sounds like a good username.

But yeah, GSDs seem to rarely be owned by someone who knows what they're doing. When they are, they're amazing. When they aren't, they're not only annoying as gently caress but also super dangerous. It just makes me so sad to see a dog that would blossom in another environment being crated 9 hours a day, taken for one 10-minute walk, and grossly overfed/under trained. It's not specific to GSDs (high energy breeds all have this issue to some degree) but where I live they seem to be the poster dog for this sort of behavior between owner and pet, and unfortunately it's colored my entire opinion of the breed. Not proud of that but it's also saved my rear end a couple times when I blatantly disregard the owners (he's fine! He's just *anxious*) to muzzle the dog for a nail trim because gently caress no, being bit in the face once was enough for me.

I just came home and the couch was gone. There was no salvaging it.

The rescue I got my husky from in SF has a TON of huskies and malamutes because SF is a tech company cesspool and people get them because ~it looks like a wolf~ and don't realize that they need a lot of exercise and work, which isn't really compatible when you're a computer nerd who wants to stay inside mostly(not that they're all like that obviously). I lucked out and my pup sleeps approximately all day and is content with a couple trips outside, brief bursts of playing and a bone to nibble on. Otherwise he's out like a light. Laziest dude ever and isn't the typical destructive type, which is nice.

I used to live with a guy who was your stereotypical moderately lovely GSD owner. Wasn't abusive but never did any kind of training with him, and he was an intact male that never, in months of living there, went for a walk(but there was a fenced in concrete industrial yard attached to the property that when the business was closed he was let out in, so that's cool, right?). He would regularly take off for days at a time and leave us with him with no explanation, but we kinda let that slide since our dogs were bros and hey, sometimes they watched our dog when we went out. He was just as neurotic as you'd imagine a pent up intact male to be, and felt the constant need to police everything, from the dogs playing(there were 7 dogs living at the warehouse, but 2 of them were kept separate), to also policing us. Like if I would tell my dog to leave something, he'd fly onto his feet and bark his head off. Or if people stood up too fast. Anything really. It was super obnoxious and basically reinforced my feelings about how most people aren't good for GSDs. Punk warehouse living spaces: not even once.


Anyways, more on topic, birds are great but I don't think I could ever own one. Same roommate that I had the ferrets with I mentioned got a green cheek conure. We worked staggered schedules so I got home earlier than her, and the drat bird demanded attention the second I walked in. It was a constant melody of the bird squaking, the ferrets chewing on the cage, and her fat cat meowing. So I started taking him out just for some drat quiet and hanging out with him, where he would proceed to quietly creep down the couch and pull out the hairs on my neck, then run away tittering. And poop on everything. He would bite my piercings when I wasn't paying attention. Birds are buttholes.

ANUSTART
Jun 26, 2013

"You get no thanks from your belly - it always forgets what you've just done for it and comes begging again the next day."


Not the worst but I was working when Petsmart first stocked scorpions and it never seemed like a great idea.

Cockmaster
Feb 24, 2002


Ema Nymton posted:

Necoro, the robot cat, came out in the early 2000s. It was very expensive at the time. I had high hopes that future robo pets would be even better!



Is that a robot pet, or an experiment to determine if the Uncanny Valley applies to animals?


Jenner posted:

I honestly think horses are the worst pet. They're stupid, they're expensive, they are prone to sickness and injury, they get spooked at everything and anything and they are a lot of work and effort. Even the hardier breeds are still quite fragile. Horses are just the worst.

I don't suppose you've been to the "Bad With Money" thread over in Business, Finance, and Careers. Quite a bit of that thread is stories of people buying horses without having made the slightest effort to understand what the gently caress they were getting into.

Mom Party
Dec 12, 2015


I've seen people in the midwest with alligators for pets.

Why??

ArtIsResistance
May 19, 2007

QUEEN OF FRANCE, SAVIOR OF LOWTAX


Mom Party posted:

I've seen people in the midwest with alligators for pets.

Why??

owns, big teeth, scaly skin, bite strength, the list goes on

Tofu Terry
Oct 4, 2015

by FactsAreUseless


Perfect for my moat now that God Lord Emperor Trump is in power

jlechem
Nov 2, 2011



Fun Shoe

I would have to say any kind ape. You have to put them in diapers from flinging literal poo poo at you. Plus chimps are super loving strong and could literally kill a human being. So they freak me the gently caress out.

Second would be anything small, furry, and rodentia like. Having mice and rats was a royal pain in the rear end for no benefit.

Eifert Posting
Mar 31, 2007

Atkins Diet


I had Egyptian spiny mice and the only thing they ever wanted to do was bite humans or each other. We got to choose between them starving themselves separated or tearing literal gashes in each other together.

I felt so bad but holy gently caress they were vicious little buggers.

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Avshalom
Feb 14, 2012

by Lowtax


porkswordonboard posted:

I guess that's really way more about the owners then the dogs, but I decided a long time ago German Shepherds are at the bottom of the list (with pugs) as to dogs I'd ever consider owning. Good for you if you have one and care for it though! They are beautiful even if they're not for me.
i will always remember walking my dog down the street in sydney late at night (he had a bit of gastro so needed to be taken out to empty himself) and this tiny old woman comes half-running along being towed by a german shepherd bigger than she was, she saw my dog and her face went white and she started screaming "CROSS THE ROAD! CROSS THE ROAD! HE'LL KILL YOUR DOG!"

obviously i crossed the road and my dog survived but drat imagine having to go through that every single time you encounter another dog in public. i'm guessing she had to walk at night (it was about 11pm) because the dog was so aggressive and too big for her to control

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