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EBB
Feb 15, 2005

Come on vote for me people I'm kicking all the browns out pinky swear. That lady has cobwebs in her vagina and she smells.

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EBB
Feb 15, 2005

No no no vote for me that guy has a dead animal on his head and has an expression like Maggie Thatcher queefed in his mouth.

Nice and hot piss
Jan 31, 2004

First off I'd like to thank all you fine people of GIP and the support you've given me on this campaign trail. EBB cares more about his posts per day than he does the QUALITY of his actual posts.

If elected GIP president I promise Kodiak dip rolls for every person , cheap affordable military special whiskey and a fat chick for every..single...bedroom!!!

CommieGIR
Aug 22, 2006

The blue glow is a feature, not a bug


Pillbug
I'm just asking questions, I swear.

Also, nukes should be used in place of normal bombs.

90% funding for NASA.

EBB
Feb 15, 2005

Murderbot says he's praying for a giant asteroid to destroy the planet. How can he explain the funding bill for NASA he supported that went towards paying for asteroid intercept missions? He can't. That's just science.

CommieGIR
Aug 22, 2006

The blue glow is a feature, not a bug


Pillbug

EVA BRAUN BLOWJOBS posted:

Murderbot says he's praying for a giant asteroid to destroy the planet. How can he explain the funding bill for NASA he supported that went towards paying for asteroid intercept missions? He can't. That's just science.

You Can't Explain That (tm)

bloops
Dec 30, 2010

Thanks Ape Pussy!
Which one of you has a dog and/or giant lovely breasts.

Mike-o
Dec 25, 2004

Now I'm in your room
And I'm in your bed


Grimey Drawer
We haven't heard the talking points of the third party candidate, giant meteor. The system is rigged.

Nice and hot piss
Jan 31, 2004

I think the topic of giant asteroids destroying the planet has been discussed at length, and every single time that it's been brought up into discussion there's a surmountable evidence that shows that I did nothing wrong praying for a giant asteroid. I have been under scrutiny for the past 2 months after putting "giant asteroid 2016" bumper sticker on my car, and subsequently taking it off after I was told to.

EBB is more focused on a border between GIP and GBS that he actually PRAISED the GBSEXIT which we all know has caused a large amount of internet meme suffrage.

bloops
Dec 30, 2010

Thanks Ape Pussy!
The giant meteor is Biden

EBB
Feb 15, 2005

Slander and lies. Lyin' Liberal Murderbot is the one who supported GBSEXIT. Now these refugee posters roam the forums looking for their orphaned bookmarked threads. Thanks to my opponent we've had to take on the burden of the F35 thread. Tell me, if I gave you a bowl of Skittles and told you three of them were shitposters, would you eat the Skittles?

Nice and hot piss
Jan 31, 2004

Release your web browsing history

bloops
Dec 30, 2010

Thanks Ape Pussy!
Vet new posters imo

EBB
Feb 15, 2005

MurderBot posted:

Release your web browsing history

BREAKING: Candidate MURDERBOT gets off on looking through our figuratrive bedroom windows!

Nice and hot piss
Jan 31, 2004

Just look at EBB's probation history. Is this who we want the future of GIP looking up to?

I have extensive relations in foreign forum policies to include YLLS the former GBS and business finance and careers. I am friends with the LGBT and hope for an endorsement from N4I, unlike EBB who would rather try and drag my name through the mud..


Besides, aren't you all ready for a MALE NURSE PRESIDENT!?! #ShatterTheMaleNurseGlassCeiling.

McNally
Sep 12, 2007

Ask me about Proposition 305


Do you like muskets?
If I'm elected, I promise to do absolutely nothing.

I don't see how that could be any worse than the last 227 years of people doing things.

EBB
Feb 15, 2005

I may not play by the rules, but I make tons of avatars.

Riot Carol Danvers
Jul 30, 2004

It's super dumb, but I can't stop myself. This is just kind of how I do things.
If elected, I promise two things:

A new economic stimulus package consisting of one free Subway footlong for all Americans*

A fresh start for the DEA in which they actually enforce drug use, as their name implies

*only from the menu, no custom sandwiches

Booblord Zagats
Oct 30, 2011


Pork Pro
I propose making that we remove the ability of Congress to veto supreme court nominees and instead allow each branch to nominate one person, and they must them battle for the robe at the next Wrestlemania in a no-holds-barred cage match with the chief executive as referee

EBB
Feb 15, 2005

I'm EBB and I love my dead gay son.

bloops
Dec 30, 2010

Thanks Ape Pussy!
To the candidates: do you believe boobs have been superseded by butts in this country? If so, how do you tackle that issue?

Please answer within 1 minute.

Booblord Zagats
Oct 30, 2011


Pork Pro

holocaust bloopers posted:

To the candidates: do you believe boobs have been superseded by butts in this country? If so, how do you tackle that issue?

Please answer within 1 minute.

I believe that neither is subservient to the the other, but instead we have reached a golden age of hourglass figures and realizing that the only people who gently caress fatties are degenerates who's opinions don't matter

Nice and hot piss
Jan 31, 2004

holocaust bloopers posted:

To the candidates: do you believe boobs have been superseded by butts in this country? If so, how do you tackle that issue?

Please answer within 1 minute.


First, let me be the one to say thank you to bring up this important question. In a time like now, we need to make sure we can answer these tough questions in regards to Butts and Boobs across this great country.

I grew up in a generation where butts and boobs were both equally cherished in this world. Where a man would be able to smack asses and motorboat tits without repercussion from their fellow man.

Unfortunately we do not live in these times now. I stand in full support of the butt movement towards a rekindling of equality between butts and boobs, but it will take a strong leader, a firm leader, a leader who enjoys a nice butt.....But also loves tits smashed in his face.

Null Integer
Mar 1, 2006

A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject.

Mike-o posted:

We haven't heard the talking points of the third party candidate, giant meteor. The system is rigged.

He's got my vote!

Mike-o
Dec 25, 2004

Now I'm in your room
And I'm in your bed


Grimey Drawer

Booblord Zagats posted:

I believe that neither is subservient to the the other, but instead we have reached a golden age of hourglass figures and realizing that the only people who gently caress fatties are degenerates who's opinions don't matter

Otherwise known as the deplorables.

EBB
Feb 15, 2005

holocaust bloopers posted:

To the candidates: do you believe boobs have been superseded by butts in this country? If so, how do you tackle that issue?

Please answer within 1 minute.

I think we can all agree that a modest natural rear end or rack far exceeds a heftier implant. A handful of supple Bs is superior to saline DDs.

CommieGIR
Aug 22, 2006

The blue glow is a feature, not a bug


Pillbug
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qI3K6p4LVc0

Minuteman III for president.

Time Crisis Actor
Apr 28, 2002


I sexually identify as a fat tinder girl,

Yeah lemme just clean my pannus first.

These candles smell amazing btw
I pose this question to both candidates: Who's a good dog?

Booblord Zagats
Oct 30, 2011


Pork Pro

Deathy McDeath posted:

I pose this question to both candidates: Who's a good dog?

All of them

Riot Carol Danvers
Jul 30, 2004

It's super dumb, but I can't stop myself. This is just kind of how I do things.

holocaust bloopers posted:

To the candidates: do you believe boobs have been superseded by butts in this country? If so, how do you tackle that issue?

Please answer within 1 minute.




I believe we live in a world where boobs and butts can be appreciated equally. Is that not what this country was founded on?

Deathy McDeath posted:

I pose this question to both candidates: Who's a good dog?

There are no bad dogs, only bad masters.

aphid_licker
Jan 7, 2009


This election has been going on for about a million years too long already. Thank god it's going to be the last one.

Terrible Robot
Jul 2, 2010

FRIED CHICKEN
Slippery Tilde

EVA BRAUN BLOWJOBS posted:

I think we can all agree that a modest natural rear end or rack far exceeds a heftier implant. A handful of supple Bs is superior to saline DDs.

:patriot:

Jaguars!
Jul 31, 2012


Mike-o posted:

We haven't heard the talking points of the third party candidate, giant meteor. The system is rigged.

Giant Meteor does not debate. It just delivers the sweet release of death.

Syrian Lannister
Aug 25, 2007

Oh, did I kill him too?
I've been a very busy little man.


Sugartime Jones

CommieGIR posted:


Minuteman III for president.

SS-18 for VP

shyduck
Oct 3, 2003


I want to die

Lazy Reservist
Nov 30, 2005

FUBIJAR
Which candidate promises to convince Katy Perry that doing naked jumping jacks will bring about world peace?

MA-Horus
Dec 3, 2006

I'm sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of how awesome I am.


Titan II for president.

I'll take the 9MT shot, thank you kindly.

CommieGIR
Aug 22, 2006

The blue glow is a feature, not a bug


Pillbug

MA-Horus posted:

I'll take the 9MT shot, thank you kindly.

Fair enough.

not caring here
Feb 22, 2012

blazemastah 2 dry 4 u
gently caress 'em all to death!

Garrison 2016

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Riot Carol Danvers
Jul 30, 2004

It's super dumb, but I can't stop myself. This is just kind of how I do things.

Lazy Reservist posted:

Which candidate promises to convince Katy Perry that doing naked jumping jacks will bring about world peace?

I plan to put large amounts of taxpayer dollars into cloning research, to advance the cause of cloning Katy Perry.

Picture a clone army made entirely of naked Katy Perry. We wouldn't even need to fight anyone.

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