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Hey y'all I'm spinning this off from the Army thread where people have been calling out their leadership by name and thought a good old anonymous confessions/ call out / etc thread could be worth a shot. N4I has given his approval but of course will lock it if it gets too silly. Don't post crazy opsec poo poo because I honestly don't know if how you poo poo on an AWACS is classified and I don't want to look it up so use some sense Anyhow you can send emails to: gipsmdftbac@gmail.com If you're worried I'm gonna tattle you can use something like https://www.guerrillamail.com/ which is what the EN thread OP uses and that seems to work out for everyone. So go on gip, tell us about your warcrimes or the time you hosed your soldiers wife! edit gently caress I misspelled the thread title and forgot a tag non anonymous confession: I'm retarded CHICKEN SHOES fucked around with this message at 20:18 on Oct 17, 2016 |
# ? Oct 17, 2016 20:16 |
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# ? Mar 28, 2024 18:33 |
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Hillary Clintons Thong posted:
gg
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# ? Oct 17, 2016 20:31 |
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quote:I ordered Polish acid off of Silkroad when it still existed and soon forgot about ordering it. Fast forward 2 months. My mail went to squadron HQ for some reason that week instead of my mailbox so my platoon sergeant handed it to me in the troop hq office. I immediately knew what it was because the letter was addressed from some phony catholic charity based in Warsaw. I took it back to my barracks room that night and immediately did all 3 hits (sugar coated gelatin tabs infused with LSD). I was tripping my balls off but I was really hungry so I went to eat at the DFAC for dinner. The female soldier at the front checking CAC cards commented that she liked my smile, which almost resulted in a nervous breakdown. I ate as quickly as I could, paranoid as gently caress that someone was onto me. After I finished I went back to my room and looked at some porn before trying to go to bed, which didn't happen for like 5 more hours. The next day we had a ruck march with my platoon. I think I was still coming down from the high because I ran the entire thing without feeling any pain and beat everyone by 15 minutes. LSD is impossible to detect with a drug test so I never got caught and that was the only time I ever did drugs in the military.
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# ? Oct 17, 2016 20:46 |
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quote:http://www.stripes.com/news/army/army-major-convicted-of-being-drunk-and-disorderly-1.190866
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# ? Oct 17, 2016 20:46 |
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Tag fixed the typos staying in though since we collectively have to remember our enlisted roots. Friendly reminder to keep the opsec tea-spilling out of your confessions. I don't want another convo with the Feds.
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# ? Oct 17, 2016 21:15 |
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2spooky4me posted:I don't want another convo with the Feds. So you gonna submit that or...
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# ? Oct 17, 2016 21:21 |
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I never got any fed phone calls when I was a mod
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# ? Oct 17, 2016 21:30 |
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quote:
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# ? Oct 17, 2016 22:08 |
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Oh, and trying to figure out who the identity of the anonymous poster is not cool and kind of ruins the thread gimmick so don't do it!
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# ? Oct 17, 2016 22:38 |
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quote:I came back from my first deployment without seeing any combat, but I felt really guilty about it. It seemed like so many people had built it up to be this big grand thing that not shooting anyone felt like a big letdown. Like this was supposed to be the thing that was going to define your life and make a man out of you, and I missed out on it.
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# ? Oct 17, 2016 23:01 |
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quote:I once lied about seeing combat to shut a kid up in one of my classes who wouldn't stop talking about all soldiers being baby killers. It was flimsy as hell, I wasn't even in the Army, I was in Navy lol but the whole class bought it. On one hand I feel bad about it, but on the other I'm almost shocked at about how easy it is to lie to civilians and wonder if I can exploit it.
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# ? Oct 17, 2016 23:34 |
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quote:I did a lot of drugs in the military. I never got caught, but was super close to getting caught a bunch. Not just weed but coke and pills. Not like anyone doesn't abuse pain pills in the military.
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# ? Oct 18, 2016 01:46 |
at Navy guy for: 1) not claiming to be a Marine instead of being in the Army 2) not just saying you were in the Navy What the hell is wrong with you hahaha if you had told a bunch of civilians you 'deployed' to the Strait of Hormuz or something they wouldn't have known the difference
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# ? Oct 18, 2016 03:57 |
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quote:I'm not in the armed forces but I hosed an IDF member in the rear end once, does that count? He was in some kind of secret artillery unit. We didn't use protection. Insh'allah.
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# ? Oct 18, 2016 04:52 |
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quote:SO NO poo poo THERE I WUZ, a 19 year old private on the 4th week of EIB training, just after a "voluntary" Saturday. Training entailed marching 4 miles to the training site every morning and 4 miles back every evening. Needless to say, I was tired. Had just ordered myself a pizza and was ready to relax that Saturday evening.
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# ? Oct 18, 2016 04:54 |
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Hillary Clintons Thong posted:cum-stained ASUs I knew a guy once that got roomed with the person he hated more than anyone else. When he left the platoon to PCS he decided to take his revenge in spectacular fashion. He took his old cum-stained gently caress sock that he kept during deployment and never washed and decided to put it to use. He dusted everything that belonged to his hated roommate with the dried-up, crusty, Afghan dusted semen. Everything. He took special care to apply some to the toothbrush and pillow of the guy. Now, everybody in the platoon found out shortly after it happened, but we waited until a month after the PCS ceremony to tell the victim what went down. While we were training in Hohenfels. Dude started bawling. Funniest poo poo of my life.
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# ? Oct 18, 2016 05:22 |
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quote:Here's two. One fun, one serious.
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# ? Oct 18, 2016 14:09 |
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quote:I hosed an E-7 running the academic poo poo for MCRD San Diego a few times while I was stationed at Pendleton as a lowly corporal. She was this super fit, tiny blonde thing with a killed body and an ehhhh face. but she was bossy as gently caress until he clothes were off, she then wanted to be tied up, called names and barebacked. So if any of you went to MCRD around 03-04 and remember a little blonde gunny chick, she totally had her g-spot half way up her rear end in a top hat
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# ? Oct 18, 2016 14:15 |
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To the guy who earned the SF tab: Yes, wear it proudly. I too was stationed with the SF guys on their compound. Our main task was "counter-insurgency" operations for two platoons, the other two platoons got tasked out with the SF guys and filled holes in gun trucks or got hauled up to Sadr City/other locations and provided security both in base and during missions, until about 6 months in when poo poo was getting pretty unstable and our command decided to pull us out and keep us on base and continue our primary mission of counter-insurg south of the airport. Even when we got back it wasn't uncommon to see a few people rolling with the SF combat patches from completely different units. I asked one dude where he was deployed and it was nowhere near where I was, but nobody will really give 2 shits unless you start the whole "yeah see this? SF bruh call me operator Joe" Just be honest, nobody will say anything until you decide to take the patch and throw it on your left shoulder.
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# ? Oct 18, 2016 14:47 |
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MurderBot posted:To the guy who earned the SF tab: QFT I was assigned to 3rd SFG, and was never tabbed out either.
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# ? Oct 18, 2016 15:15 |
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I thought I was going to read stories of privates strangling juicy girls to death, all this is boooring
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# ? Oct 18, 2016 21:08 |
It's the most military thread. The idea of it is way more fun than the actual execution.
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# ? Oct 18, 2016 21:33 |
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Ice Cream Barbara posted:I thought I was going to read stories of privates strangling juicy girls to death, all this is boooring
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# ? Oct 19, 2016 00:31 |
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one time the army sucked really bad, but then I realized it was my whole career, and I realized I spent most of my twenties not smoking pot and socializing with real people or being well-rounded, so I got depression.
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# ? Oct 19, 2016 06:31 |
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oh sorry make it anonymous.
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# ? Oct 19, 2016 06:33 |
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quote:i once had a female troop who was kind of cute in like a 'gently caress it, it's the only game in town' sort of way. i got her drunk one night and hosed her because i knew i could. i told her that if she told anyone what happened i would ruin her career. she had a nervous breakdown a few months later and chaptered out. last i heard she was back in her hometown living with her parents and i think has a drug problem.
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# ? Oct 19, 2016 14:30 |
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quote:Okay, one more, since Teflon Don wants anonymous choking stories.
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# ? Oct 19, 2016 14:30 |
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Hillary Clintons Thong posted:Hannibal Lector sex story. This is why we have SAPR training every goddamn year.
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# ? Oct 19, 2016 14:52 |
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Hillary Clintons Thong posted:"Hi, I'm the guy. The rear end in a top hat that makes us take SAPR every year" Jesus loving christ.
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# ? Oct 19, 2016 15:45 |
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loving kill yourself you rapey piece of poo poo. Not even loving joking.
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# ? Oct 19, 2016 16:09 |
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Hillary Clintons Thong posted:SHARP violation. Jesus gently caress, I hope you end up castrated, dude.
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# ? Oct 19, 2016 16:15 |
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Statistically at least two of you fucks are hiding a similar story.
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# ? Oct 19, 2016 16:21 |
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Godholio posted:Statistically at least two of you fucks are hiding a similar story. Rapists may self-select not to respond to that one.
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# ? Oct 19, 2016 16:22 |
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I'm gonna kick your freaking rear end guy
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# ? Oct 19, 2016 16:31 |
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J.A.B.C. posted:Jesus gently caress, I hope you end up castrated, dude. Bruh, its locker room talk.... all guys talk like that....
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# ? Oct 19, 2016 16:36 |
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I hope that's stdh.txt otherwise you need to have your balls snipped off. You're human garbage.
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# ? Oct 19, 2016 16:37 |
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you are giant pile of human feces
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# ? Oct 19, 2016 16:41 |
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# ? Oct 19, 2016 16:48 |
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What did you guys think this thread was going to be about if not petty criminality, covering up blatant TO violations, wanton disregard for human life, and sexual misconduct?
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# ? Oct 19, 2016 16:48 |
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# ? Mar 28, 2024 18:33 |
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I already spilled all of my gip confessions in the days of grover as I told opsec (not opsec) stories and he tried to scrub my posting history
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# ? Oct 19, 2016 17:04 |